I'm Ziltoid, the omniscient.
I've come far from across the omniverse.
You shall fetch me your universe's ultimate cup of coffee: black.
You have five Earth minutes.
Make it perfect!"
Ziltoid the Omniscient is the tenth studio album by Devin Townsend.
The album is a concept album about an extraterrestrial being named Ziltoid from the planet Ziltoidia 9. Ziltoid travels to Earth in search of "your universe's ultimate cup of coffee". Townsend describes the album as a mix between Strapping Young Lad and The Devin Townsend Band, with a storyline like that of Punky Brüster's Cooked on Phonics. This album is also what made Devin decide to continue his career as a musician since, prior to this, he was going to leave music and become a puppeteer.
Received a sequel album, Dark Matters, in 2014.
Tracklist:
- "ZTO" (1:17)
- "By Your Command" (8:09)
- "Ziltoidia Attaxx!!!" (3:42)
- "Solar Winds" (9:46)
- "Hyperdrive" (3:47)
- "N9" (5:30)
- "Planet Smasher" (5:45)
- "Omnidimensional Creator" (0:48)
- "Color Your World" (9:44)
- "The Greys" (4:15)
- "Tall Latte" (1:03)
Personnel:
Devin Townsend: vocals, guitar, bass, keyboards, drum programming, production, mixing, engineering.
Ziltoid commands you to read his tropes!
- Album Intro Track: "ZTO" ends with Ziltoid introducing himself.
- Alien Invasion: Naturally.
- Aliens Are Bastards: Ziltoid declares full scale war on Earth because the coffee they gave him was "fetid".
- All Just a Dream: The entire story was actually just a Starbucks employee day dreaming.
- Being Evil Sucks: For Ziltoid, it does.
- Breakout Character: Devin's fans absolutely love Ziltoid, to the point where Devin took note by giving Ziltoid a cameo in Deconstruction and another starring role in Dark Matters, on top of Ziltoid becoming Devin's Metal Band Mascot.
- Character Catchphrase: Ziltoid's "Yeeeeeeeeeeees" could be seen as this.
- Disproportionate Retribution: Ziltoid attempts to destroy the Earth after being served a bad cup of coffee.
- Evil Gloating: Ziltoid. All the time.
- Fluffy the Terrible: Herman the Planet Smasher.
- Gosh Darn It to Heck!: "Phooey! And double phooey!"
- Harsh Vocals: The Planet Smasher speaks exclusively like this.
- Large Ham: Ziltoid loves being this. The Planet Smasher also qualifies.
- Laughably Evil: Guess who.
- Lighter and Softer: After Accelerated Evolution and the two ambient albums, this album is pretty light-hearted by comparison (though musically it's actually heavier).
- More than Three Dimensions: Ziltoid is a fourth-dimensional guitar hero after all. The Planet Smasher is evidently seventh-dimensional.
- Must Have Caffeine: The reason behind Ziltoid's invasion.
- Precision F-Strike: The only notable one occurs during "Color Your World" during Ziltoid's Villainous Breakdown. "I'M ZILTOID! I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!"
- Random Events Plot: The first half of the album tells a somewhat coherent story: Ziltoid demands coffee, only to be dissatisfied with the cup he's given and destroying the Earth, then fleeing while Captain Spectacular pursues him. After "Hyperdrive", the plot starts to make less sense, with Ziltoid just encountering alien after alien with little connection between them. Justified when it's revealed that Ziltoid's adventures are All Just a Dream.
- Rule of Funny: This is Devin's second comedy album, the first being Cooked on Phonics.
- Self-Backing Vocalist: Devin performed all the vocals for the album, so this is a given.
- Soprano and Gravel: An interesting example since Devin is the primary vocalist on the album. He goes through a pretty impressive range of clean singing and Harsh Vocals.
- Summon Bigger Fish: Ziltoid attempts to do this by awakening the Planet Smasher. Backfires when the Planet Smasher rejects him. Turns out he hates musicals.
- This Cannot Be!: "The humans are no longer on our radar!" - "What?? Curses!"
- We Will Meet Again: "Until we meet again, commander!"
- Wham Line: "I. AM. A. PUPPET! YOU. ARE. A. PUPPET! WE. ARE. ALL. PUPPETS!"