"Living well is the best revenge."
— George Herbert, "Outlandish Proverbs", 1640
It is often said that Revenge is a dish Best Served Cold. However, some people think it's best not served at all.
Distinct from Forgiveness (though there can be overlap), this is when a character who could seek revenge instead chooses not to. Not because they forgive their enemy or understand them, or because they worry that revenge will turn out to be ultimately unsatisfying, or even because seeking revenge would be impractical. But simply because they know it's better for them to live their own life. They might rub it in their enemy's faces if they get the chance, though. Other times, while the character will never take revenge, the audience will be shown how the enemy ruined their life through their own actions. May overlap with Thriving Ex-Crush.
Essentially an aversion of Revenge Before Reason. Can also involve Know When to Fold 'Em. Not uncommon to involve Evil Cannot Comprehend Good, as their enemy cannot understand why anyone wouldn't want revenge. Contrast Paranoia Gambit, where the important part of the revenge is to drive the enemy crazy believing you will perform a more regular revenge when you're doing this instead.
Examples:
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Fan Works
- At the end of Bruises, one of Hiro's students asks him why, after everything Callaghan put him through, he chose to major in the same subject Callaghan taught in, become a professor like he did, and even teach out of the same classroom and office that he used. Hiro's response?
Hiro: Because it's a nicer way of saying: F--- you.
- In part 2 of Interviews with a Screenbug
, Taylor Hebert doesn't bother tormenting Emma when they finally meet again in Hollywood years later as she's already so successful that it's pointless. Instead, she offers a bit of genuine help in getting her an audition and the only revenge she gets is that Emma is auditioning to be an Alpha Bitch in a high school movie.
- The My Hero Academia fanfic Revenge is a Life Well Lived runs on this trope. When Dabi is sent back to past, his first thought is to kill his little brother Shouto and their Abusive father Endeavor for revenge. However, he instead kidnaps Shouto and decides to raise him, as a means of turning him against Endeavor. As the fic goes on, Dabi becomes more empathetic and attached, and in time he is satisfied with the life he builds and doesn't want to kill anyone. Instead he takes great pleasure in rubbing in Endeavor's face how much better off his family is without him.
- The Palaververse: When talking about Saddle Arabian religion, they now believe that God Is Evil, hating their Creation and:
its more philosophical inhabitants inclined to regard the very act of living happy lives as an act of defiance against the Creator.
- Story Shuffle: "Last Trump": Queen Ferana's last words to her friend, before she died in single combat against The Monstrosity, were:
Live well, for that is the best revenge
- Wish Carefully: As Lucius bitterly notes, while the Death Eaters and other dark-aligned figures are suffering in the Hell that their own ideologies created, Harry Potter, as well his fellow Light-aligned friends and family, have been noted to be living it up in the new magical society they created in the Pacific Islands, with Harry being rumored to have fathered a dozen children. Voldemort was not happy when he learned about this and it only drove him further into Ax-Crazy madness.
Film — Live-Action
- Legally Blonde: Elle goes out of her way to attend the same law school as the boy who dumped her, hoping in parts to win him back and in parts to show him up. She ends up making friends with his new girlfriend (and new ex), getting a much better boyfriend, and graduating ahead of him in law school, while he didn't succeed in much of anything despite thinking he was too good for her.
Literature
- Cradle Series: Lindon was spat on and mistreated his entire life by the people of Sacred Valley, who saw him as a cripple who couldn't do anything useful. He spent that life trying to make something of himself regardless and never considered fighting back. When he discovered that a great catastrophe was coming, he left the Valley to train to become strong enough to defeat it. When he finally comes back, he tries to get all his old enemies to evacuate. They cannot understand why he would possibly want to help them, assume it's all a trick, and try to murder him multiple times.
- Trapped in a Dating Sim: The World of Otome Games is Tough for Mobs: In volume 1, after befriending both Livia and Angie, Leon advises them that the best revenge on their respective opponents (Livia's bullies, Angie's ex-fiancé and his new girlfriend) is to be happy, because directly taking revenge on somebody is too much work for too little gain. Leon's way, the other person will see you being happy despite them and it'll make them miserable.
"Classic revenge takes an insane amount of effort, and it only makes the other person unhappy. Meanwhile, you don't really get anything in the process. You both go down together. If you're going to spend that much effort on something, you might as well spend it on making yourself happy."
Live-Action TV
- Atlanta: After leaving Princeton (for what's revealed to be a very minor misdemeanor that gets escalated out of all control or proportion), Earn says that he was motivated to come back to Atlanta and make a success of his life to show them he didn't need them. He does ultimately earn a lot of success, but the implication gets deconstructed in "The Homeliest Little Horse". Earn discusses at therapy that, while all the success has given him a lot of material benefits, he's never really faced his past so his success doesn't mean as much. He eventually comes around to it, though.
- Harry & Meghan ends with the titular couple living their best life in a beautiful house in California, surrounded by family and friends. Harry, having been hounded by toxic British tabloids his entire life and feeling like his role in his family was to deflect criticism from his older brother, feels free and happy, though he misses his home country and friends he left behind.
- Seinfeld: Discussed in the episode "The Revenge". George quits his job and when he tries to return, the boss won't hire him back and tells him he's a loser. George plans to get him back by slipping a mickey. Jerry suggests the best revenge is to live well, but George says there's no chance of that. And later in the episode, Jerry does a stand-up scene where he talks about the concept. He states that it wouldn't work in a Charles Bronson movie and goes on a spiel where Bronson has his family killed by thugs. A person suggests to Bronson he should get a new car, a custom-made suit, and a home makeover to get back at the thugs.
Music
- R.E.M.: The opening track on Accelerate, "Living Well Is the Best Revenge", revolves around the narrator facing an onslaught of insults, attacks, and other vitriol and brushing them all off in favor of simply living life to the fullest. According to Michael Stipe, the song was penned as a Take That! to both right-wing pundit Bill O'Reilly and an unnamed person he admired who badmouthed the band, summarizing the song as "fuck you! Sing like this, you talented fuck."
Video Games
- Assassin's Creed II: Ezio Auditore beats the ever-loving stuffing out of Rodrigo Borgia, the man responsible for the murders of Ezio's father and brothers, in a final fistfight beneath the Vatican. Content to leave Rodrigo to wallow in his humiliating defeat, Ezio lets him live and attempts to retire. Defied in the Immediate Sequel Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood when Rodrigo's son Cesare destroys Ezio's home on the first "official" day of his retirement, putting himself and Rodrigo at the top of Ezio's hit list with it being noted that in spite of the humiliation the Borgias are still in power by the end of II.
- God of War (PS4): One of Jötnar shrines tells about the Frost Giant Bergelmir, who alongside his spouse was the only surviving Giant from the blood inundation caused by the death of Ymir, the first Giant, in the hands of the Aesir gods. Mimir notices how Bergelmir could've sought vengeance against the Aesir for drowning his people in the blood of their ancestor, but he instead chose his revenge to be living on, having many children with his wife and thus ensuring that the Giants would continue to thrive instead of disappearing.
Webcomics
- Grrl Power: Referenced. Deus is quite possibly the richest man in the world (he is personally one of the strongest economies in the world), handsome, charismatic, and has an impressive dating history. When Sydney mentions his impressive accomplishments, he claims that he is "getting revenge on many, many people" (by living really, really well).
- Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal has The Best Revenge where a guy runs a mini golf course in response to his family having been murdered by a man rather than taking revenge. Judging by his shaking in the last panel, he's...probably not doing so well despite his insistence.
- The Adventures of Dr. McNinja: Franz Rayner explains to Gordito that his genocide of the ninjas was a mix of this and the more conventional way of revenge because it (and the movies he made documenting the slaughter) got him fame and fortune.
Western Animation
- Batman: The Animated Series: The Joker attempts to do this in the episode "Joker's Millions", using his inheritance to clean up his reputation and live the high life right in Batman's face. Penguin even congratulates the normally erratic clown for making this decision. Unfortunately, the whole thing turns out to be a vicious last act of revenge against the Joker as most of the money turns out to be fake.
- Gravity Falls: In "Irrational Treasure", Mabel Pines decides not to spill the dirt on Pacifica's family cover-up as revenge for Pacifica calling her silly, because she has learned that "being silly is awesome" and no longer cares what Pacifica thinks. Immediately defied by her brother, who "hasn't learned anything" and spills the dirt for her.
- Moral Orel: Implied in the Distant Finale. Orel never sought revenge on Clay for the abuse and manipulation he endured throughout the series, but he got it anyway — he and his brothers have grown up happy and successful, while his parents are still trapped in their miserable facade of a marriage.
