Secretly Gay Activity

Keith: Besides, you're always hugging [Catarina] and touching her and stuff yourself!
Mary: Oh, but that's completely normal between two girls! [blushes and swoons] Eventually, we'll also bathe together...
Keith: There's clearly nothing normal about you saying that!

— My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom!

Character A is in love with Character B of the same gender and wants to make a move, but is worried that their beloved (or outside observers) may be repulsed by the advance.

Thus, they disguise their flirtation within a wholesome, innocent, totally-not-sexual-and-completely-platonic activity that is perfectly acceptable for people of the same gender.

This trope is very much Truth in Television. It's especially common with young teens or adults who are trying to figure out their feelings or sexuality, especially if such topics are taboo in their home or community. After all, parents that would right out dismiss a boy and girl being alone together for just five minutes would barely give a thought to an all-girls sleepover or two boys "playing rough". Even amongst adults, it can be scary (or even dangerous) to make one's attraction known, and LGBT men and women have used coded words and body language to signal each other for centuries.

A Japanese-specific variation of this trope is the Skinship Grope. Being a hierarchal society (as well as very conservative about things like gender and sexuality), Japanese people see bathhouses as one of the few places where everyone is equal regardless of status or age, and since same-sex bathing is the most common, people may use this opportunity to "check out" or even grope members of the same sex.

Amongst women, giving one another massages or rubbing suntan oil on each other under the justification of "It's okay because we're both girls" is also common. As mentioned before, a male equivalent would be full-contact sports like wrestling or rugby (which makes this a zig-zagged subtrope of Men Are Tough). Women and young people of both genders may utilize a Fanservice Faux Fight.

The characters involved may be trying to test their Gaydar. If a work does this so subtly that non-intended audiences can miss it, this is Homoerotic Subtext. If it's offscreen and never shown, it's Hide Your Gays and Hide Your Lesbians. This trope can also be considered an invoked and targeted version of Stupid Sexy Flanders and the inverse of Gay Bravado.

May also involve the Hands-On Approach and a Subordinate Excuse. More subtle or incognito versions may try to cover up with Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today?. See also Practice Kiss.

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Examples:

Anime & Manga

• Ayakashi Triangle:
  • After Matsuri is turned female, Suzu is surprised to find she's still physically attracted to him. Following this, she using being "girl friends" as an excuse to get physically close to Matsuri in ways she wouldn't if he was still male, like sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the school bus or inviting him to her bedroom alone.
    Matsuri: Aren't we sitting too close?
    Suzu: It's normal. It's not weird for girl friends to sit like this.
  • Reo, meanwhile, has taken any excuse to get much more affectionate to Matsuri since he became a girl. She's smelled his whole body when analyzing the spell that changed his sex, groped his breast while applying suntain oil, and stripped him topless to apply ointment to his injuries. Most of the time, Reo isn't trying to hide that she's into girls (she even flirts with Suzu after explaining this to her), Matsuri just seems to be blind to or willfully ignorant of it.
  • When Matsuri temporarily thinks he always was a girl and loses his memories, things work out differently. Reo's absurd closeness sends Matsuri running off screaming. Conversely, Suzu's attempt to seduce Matsuri by asking for a massage ends up with Suzu collapsing in ecstasy while Matsuri walks off completely clueless.
• Zigzagged in No Matter How I Look at It, It's You Guys' Fault I'm Not Popular!: Tomoko frequently does many activities with Yuu and later Asuka as a means to lust after then, but she's hardly secretive about it. For instance, as the both of them dye Tomoko's hair, she is visibly aroused and afterward acts as if she owed them money for sexual service. Both seem to think she's joking, even though Asuka shows signs of sharing Tomoko's feelings. She ends even up pulling a few similar moves herself, including taking a Hands-On Approach to adjust Tomoko's posture and switching a cellphone call to video while taking a bath.
• Tsugumomo:
  • In the manga, Kasumi Kagami was able to pull both Kiriha and Kukuri into a three-way lesbian relationship by disguising her activities as "skinship", as well as the standard training and bonding that a tsugumomo must do with their master. Eventually, all pretext ended in private, and the three of them were in a very sexual lesbian relationship.
  • In the present, Psycho Lesbian and Comedic Lolicon Taguri Kanayama disguises her sexual activities with Kiriha and Kukuri as being part of a game of chance. Even when the stakes of the game involve things like licking, kissing or dressing in sexy outfits, she pretends that it's just harmless fun for the three girls. At one point, Kiriha even tries to help Kukuri and Kaguya cheat by claiming to Taguri that she needed help going to the bathroom—an offer to which Taguri immediately jumps up and drags Kiriha to the bathroom to "help her" with. (It ends up backfiring anyway since Taguri had already set up backup rules to the game that stated no one was allowed to change the board or cards except herself.)

Comic Books

• During the "Dead Wrong" arc of Runaways, Molly and Klara have a picnic together, and Klara at one point can be seen watching dreamily as Molly plays on the grass. Note also that at the time, the entire team was under a spell that rendered them mentally incapable of tolerating each other's presence for more than a few minutes unless another emotion interfered with the spell (like Karolina and Xavin's love for each other or Victor's unresolved feelings for Nico...)

Film - Live Action

• A.W.O.L.: Joey starts to work for Rayna as her daughters' babysitter to cover them spending time together as lovers.
• In Brokeback Mountain, Ennis and Jack go on yearly "fishing trips" together away from their wives. Ennis's wife figures out the truth behind these trips when she opens Ennis's fishing box and sees that his tackle has never touched water.
• Carmen y Lola: The title characters' relationships starts out appearing like just a very affectionate friendship to other people (which does not seem uncommon for Roma girls), with them spending a ton of time together as they hold hands, while having private kissing sessions while they slowly fall in love.
• In Dr. T & the Women, Dee Dee uses the seemingly endless preparations for her impending wedding as an excuse to spend lots of time with her maid of honor Marilyn, who is also her secret lover.
• In Plan B, Bruno decides that the best way to win his ex-girlfriend Laura back is to get her new boyfriend Pablo to fall for him and leave Laura single and for the taking, which gives him a perfect, 100% heterosexual reason to do things like hang out with Pablo as much as possible, talk Pablo into kissing him for "acting practice", and have half-naked sleepovers with him because, well, they have only one bed available. Of course, by the end, he realizes that he's been duping himself even more than he's been duping Pablo about the true meaning of their "just being really good friends" activities.
• Rafiki: Kena and Ziki go off together often, supposedly as just friends. They use being together privately to kiss and have sex.
• The Truth About Jane: Jane and Taylor use the ruse of simply being friends visiting each other's houses and hanging out for dating as a lesbian couple.
• In The World Unseen, Miriam and Amina use their "driving lessons" as a pretense to meet up and pursue their relationship behind the back of Miriam's jealous husband.

Literature

• In American Elsewhere by Robert Jackson Bennett, two minor female characters secretly meet once a month to simply stroke each other's hand through a fence separating their backyards (both are married, and for various sinister reasons homosexuality isn't allowed in their town).
• A Certain Magical Index: Kuroko is a very aggressive lesbian girl who is deeply infatuated with Mikoto Misaka. Upon learning what school Misaka would be attending, Kuroko manipulated and somehow rigged the dormitory assignments so that she and Misaka would be sharing a dorm together. Unlike most versions of this trope, however, Kuroko is completely unsubtle about her desires (amongst people they both know, anyway) but will still often try to disguise activities like bathing with Mikoto as completely innocent. Rarely do Misaka or their friends buy it, and even if they do, Kuroko's over-eager and often lecherous desire to do the activity will usually tip them off.
• The Change Room: Sophie frequently having sleepovers with Binta it turns out was cover for their having sex together, as they're actually girlfriends. Binta's parents knew about and were fine with this, but Sophie's mom was unaware (which she's initially very upset by).
• The Chronicles of Dorsa:
  • The fact that many handmaids and mistresses sleep in the same bed helps keep it secret that Tasia is having sex with her handmaid Mylla, not just doing this platonically.
  • The same thing later also happens with Tasia and her bodyguard Joslyn, whose duty is staying at her side for protection, whether in her living quarters or not. It makes their sexual relationship easy to hide.
• If Her Flag Breaks: Megumu is a very pretty boy who grew up with sisters who liked to force him into feminine habits. Because of this, he has no idea how to look or act masculine and "befriends" (highly implied to be a romantic crush) Souta because he was the first person to recognize him as a "he". Because of this, Megumu often wants to do "manly" things with Souta, such as going to the bathroom together, which usually carry very romantic or sexual connotations.
• The Love and Lies of Rukhsana Ali: Rukhsana uses doing homework with Ariana as cover to make out with her to hide their relationship from her parents.
• My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom!:
  • The protagonist Catarina Claes forms an Unwanted Harem of both men and women. Ironically, Catarina herself provides the perfect cover for her female suitors to disguise their advances by creating a Romantic Literature Club. Many of the books in said club (again, of Catarina's own choosing) are sapphic stories of two girls sharing Forbidden Love. These stories not only give Catarina's female suitors a pretext to gush about the beauty and allure of girl-on-girl relationships but provide the means for them to spend time alone with Catarina. Sophia Ascart is the most blatant example, as she was the one Catarina originally started the club for, and Catarina is later taken aback by how much Sophia seems to enjoy yuri stories. In one scene involving a Lotus-Eater Machine, Sophia even tries to use her library of romance novels as an excuse to seduce Catarina with moves straight out of a yuri scene and convince Catarina to move in with her permanently.
  • On a more subtle scale, Catarina's other female suitors (especially Mary Hunt) will use swimming, bathing, cooking, and at one point even a possible illness to try and get Catarina alone with them in intimate situations, and directly use the fact that they're "both girls" as an excuse why it's acceptable and why the male suitors won't be allowed to interfere. It still backfires because, as stated, half of Catarina's harem is female, so one girl rarely ever gets to have her to themselves.
  • This trope is also Played for Laughs when the girls all have a slumber party together. When the male characters find out and wonder just what girls would do at such a party, Catarina suggests that the boys have one for themselves. All of the boys (except Nicol) are absolutely put off by the idea, as they can't think of anything boys would talk about for an entire night. However, Sophia (Nicol's little sister) begins imagining what she thinks boys would do in such a position, and turns wide-eyed and blushing. Further, during the actual slumber party itself, all of the girls continue flirting with Catarina and dropping subtle hints about their interest in her.

Live Action TV

• The Confessions of Frannie Langton: It's apparently common for a maid to sleep in the same bed as her mistress. This is used by Frannie and Marguerite to hide their relationship.
• Euphoria: Rue initially asks to sleep over at Jules's house because she's high and doesn't want her mom to find out. However, after watching Jules undress in front of her, Rue decides to keep contriving reasons to sleep over because it means getting to snuggle up with a scantily-clad Jules. It eventually becomes an actual explicit relationship between them.
• In Everything's Gonna Be Okay, autistic Drea has a crush on classmate Matilda (who is also autistic), and thus comes up with every pretense imaginable to get close to her - sleepovers, practice kisses, even at one point convincing Matilda to take a shower at school while she "keeps an eye out" for any peeping toms. Matilda, not being a complete idiot, eventually asks Drea if she'd like to come around to her house to fool around.
• In Friends, Susan and Carol used the excuse of being tennis partners to sneak around without Ross noticing. Carol eventually comes out to Ross and divorces him before the series begins, and apparently it came as a shock at first - though he later admits that she and Susan did play tennis a lot.
• In the Law & Order: Special Victims Unit episode "Lowdown", the squad investigates the death of a gay lawyer, and stumble across a black poker club that's actually a front for closeted gay black men.
• Midsomer Murders: When John Barnaby moves to Causton in "Death in the Slow Lane", he is approached by a man from the local rugby club who tries to entice him into joining, and explains how several members get together to 'enjoy each other's company'. He beats a hasty retreat when John asks if his wife would be welcome at these evenings.
• The Republic of Sarah: Alexis uses filing a (fake) police report for a chance to hook up with AJ (a cop) in her office. She then fills in as the police station receptionist to facilitate this.

Videogames

• Mass Effect 3: Samantha Traynor's romance subplot has a scene where she visits female Commander Shepard's quarters and gushes about how spacious and functional the Commander's showers are. She makes a passing remark that the standard showers in the women's quarters are crap, and Shepard can offer to let her use her own. If the Homoerotic Subtext wasn't thick enough with that, once Traynor steps inside, the two of them discuss a "hot date" that Traynor is getting cleaned up for "if she's interested". The player can then end all further subtlety by saying "she's interested" and joining her in the shower.

Web Comic

• Best Friends Forever: Turns out to have been happening a lot. The Noodle Incident was the fact that in a drunken state while the two were at Teddy's summer house by themselves, Vincent made a move on him and tried to kiss him (which Teddy thinks was Vincent playing a prank on him while drunk). It's later revealed, when Vincent tells his side of the story, that this was simply the only time Teddy ever realized he was making a move on him. From Vincent's perspective, he actually tried subtly hit on Teddy during that entire trip, including cuddling and singing for Teddy, all of which he took as platonic.
• El Goonish Shive:
  • In Moperville South, it becomes a widespread belief that Ellen is a lesbian (more-or-less true) and Grace is straight (true for all intents and purposes) and extremely naïve (partially true), and that Ellen is trying to secretly trick Grace into a physical relationship by suggesting such activities, including hugging her a lot (very false; Ellen is in a secret relationship with Nanase and considers her relationship with Grace to be entirely platonic, while Grace is the one initiating the hugs — she's a very physical person in general.)
  • It turned out that the reason Lucy kept going on double dates with Diane, even though she didn't like the guys she dated much and knew they were getting a reputation (which Diane was unaware of), was so she could pretend she was dating Diane.
  • A running gag in the Fourth-Wall Mail Slot was that Lisa kept attempting these sorts of things with Amanda, who seemed oblivious. "Seemed" being the key word - Amanda knew the whole time, and it's implied Lisa knew Amanda knew, and that they were simply going through the motions as a joke.

Western Animation

• South Park: In "Butters' Very Own Episode", Butters catches his dad Stephen sneaking off to a gay bath house. It's revealed that Stephen had become bi-curious at some point, and this act kicks off the plot of Butters getting drowned because of his mom's Sanity Slippage from the reveal.

Real Life

• Cottaging - the act of going to public lavatories to seduce other men - used to be common among gay men, until homosexuality became more accepted and, more importantly, legal.
• Sleepovers are frequently this for teenage lesbians and bi women, who can safely experiment under conditions of plausible deniability (hanging around in sleeping clothes together, "practicing kissing for boys," and conducting pranks that involve undressing like the bra-in-the-freezer trick).
• Lucius Beebe and Charles Clegg were arguably one of America's first gay celebrity couples; but their primary public output was on writing articles on railroad history, food and travel adventures. The two were also crucial in boosting the public awareness of Virginia City, Nevada and helping it become a tourist spot for those looking to visit the old west. Although never quite a secret, their relationship was not completely common knowledge and its not uncommon for railfans today to be surprised to find out the two were a couple.
• gay artist Tom of Finland formed a club with his friends, the Motor Sports Club, where members could dress in their favored leather motorcycle suits. Suspiciously absent? Motorcycles. MSC still exsists but is now openly a fetish group.
• the first Gay Rights organization in the Netherlands started out as an "athletic club".

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