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I've Got an X, and I'm Not Afraid to Use It!

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https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/ivegotanimageandimnotafraidtouseit.png

Stock threat/warning that you, er... Exactly What It Says on the Tin. Contrast with He's Got a Weapon!.

Only actual quotes please. I've Got an Edit Button Too and I'm Not Afraid to Use It.


We got Examples, and we're not afraid to use them!

    open/close all folders 

    I've got Comic Books and I'm not afraid to read them! 

    I've got Fan Works and I'm not afraid to read them! 
  • In a fan-art by BobTheDalek inspired by the Friendship Is Magic episode "Father Knows Beast", Starlight Glimmer has had enough of being bothered in her bath:
    Starlight Glimmer: I HAVE A BRUSH THIS TIME AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!!!
  • one day at a time (Nyame): In a flashback to his second daughter's prom night, Jason uses this threat on Helena's boyfriend, the Kryptonian clone Damien Kent (a.k.a. Dam-El, the third Superboy, fourth Nightwing at the time of the flashback, and eventually fourth Superman), to ensure he doesn't try anything with Helena while keeping her happy.
    Jason: And a quick reminder: I have a vault full of Kryptonite downstairs, and I'm not afraid to use it.
  • The Pieces Lie Where They Fell: In chapter 20 of the sequel, Picking Up the Pieces, Vix-Lei uses this in order to get Night Blade out of bed, claiming she's got a foghorn and she's not afraid to use it. After the threat serves to get him up, she admits she was kidding and that Rex (who's back in Equestria, whereas Night Blade and Vix-Lei are in the Griffish Isles at the time) is the one who actually has their foghorn. (Co-writer Anon e Mouse Jr. admits it's a Shout-Out to This Bites!.)
  • This Bites!: In chapter 52, when Cross is getting irritated at his allies laughing at him:
    "I have a foghorn and I'm not afraid to use it," I growled, bringing that little episode to a close.

    I've got Animated Films and I'm not afraid to watch them! 
  • Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman: The Sevilles' neighbor has got a lemon zester and he's not afraid to use it!
  • The Amazing Maurice: After being briefly knocked out by the Pied Piper, Kieth comes woozily comes to and hears this exchange:
    Malicia: I've got this, and I'm not afraid to use it!
    Pied Piper: That's a fork.
  • Atlantis: The Lost Empire: Used by Dr. Sweet to Mole.
    Dr. Sweet: I've got soap, and I'm not afraid to use it!
    [Mole loudly hisses before hiding under the covers of his bed]
  • In the Babar movie, when Babar, Celeste, and Zephir's attempts to get past the rhinos Totem Pole Trench style fails:
    Zephir: It was the voice, wasn't it? Stand back!
    Rhino guard: Look out, he's got a banana!
    Zephir: And I'm not afraid to use it!
  • An Extremely Goofy Movie: PJ has a biscotti, and he's not afraid to use it!
  • Corpse Bride:
    • Victor Van Dort's got a dwarf, and he's not afraid to use him!
    • He's also got a fork, and he's even LESS afraid to use it!
  • Shrek:
    • In the first film, Donkey's got a dragon and he's not afraid to use it! Made even better in the French dub, where Donkey says, "I've got a dragon and I won't hesitate to fire it!"
    • Shrek 4D: The main trio's got a loaded dragon and they're not afraid to use it!

    I've got Live-Action Films and I'm not afraid to watch them! 
  • Cats & Dogs: Like the Lizzie McGuire example, the Brody mother and father have a bat and a mitt and they aren't afraid to use it.

    I've got Jokes and I'm not afraid to tell them! 
  • Random bumper sticker says "I have an attitude and I'm not afraid to use it!"

    I've got Literature and I'm not afraid to read it! 
  • Discworld
    • Feet of Clay: "I've got a bow and I'm not afraid to use it!" The crossbow's point moved uncertainly, proving him a liar.
    • At the climax of The Wee Free Men, the Nac Mac Feegle have a cheap lawyer, and they're not afraid to use him! "With prejudice!"
  • Good Omens: "I've got a pin and I'm not afraid to use it."

    I've got Live-Action TV and I'm not afraid to watch it! 
  • Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Gary Murray's got detention slips, and he's not afraid to use them — against vampires!
  • Everwood: Dr. Andrew Brown's got mind-altering drugs in the other room and he's not afraid to use them!
  • Horrible Histories: While reporting on the Battle of Marston Moor, Mike Peabody is caught in a surprise attack by the Roundhead forces. He snatches a butter knife off Price Rupert's table and announces "I've got a butter knife and I'm not afraid to use it!"
  • House's got a full bladder and he's not afraid to use it!
  • Lizzie McGuire: His wife has a bat. Mr. McGuire has a mitt and he's not afraid to use it.
  • Naturally, Sadie: Rain has frozen pitas and he's not afraid to use them!
  • The Flying Karamazov Brothers used this line in a televised version of their stage show. "Back! Back! I've got a rubber rat, and I'm not afraid to use it!"
  • Night Court: Mel Torme grabs Harry's stuffed armadillo points the rear end at Harry and yells, "back off! I'm not afraid to use this!"
  • Sherlock: While Sherlock is communicating with John, and a police inspector who John believes (with good reason) Sherlock is about to insult, via a laptop:
    Sherlock: Pass me over.
    John: All right, but there's a mute button, and I will use it.
  • Wednesday: In the first episode, when Wednesday tries threatening Enid so she'd stop her music, the werewolf girl shows off her retractable fingernails.
    Enid: Don't mess with me! This kitty got claws, and I'm not afraid to use them.

    I've got Music and I'm not afraid to listen to it! 
  • Brad Paisley, "Flowers": "I've got a Visa in my wallet / And I'm not afraid to use it" (to continue buying roses to ask for forgiveness).

    I've got Video Games and I'm not afraid to play them! 

    I've got Webcomics and I'm not afraid to read them! 
  • Dork Tower: Ken has a bar of soap at a gaming convention and he's not afraid to use it!
  • From the lawyers duo in The Order of the Stick:
    Mr. Jones: Get back! I have a restraining order and I'm not afraid to use it!
  • From Lenny the Ranger in Our Little Adventure:
    Lenny: S-stay back. I've got a magic shield and I-I'm not afraid to use it...
  • Schlock Mercenary: A protester who pilfered Schlock's BFG threatens Breya with it. "I've got this nifty plasgun now, and I'm not afraid to use it on you, hot cheeks!" Unfortunately for him, Breya isn't afraid of using her Sonic Stunner, either.

    I've got Web Videos and I'm not afraid to stream them! 

    I've got Western Animation and I'm not afraid to watch it! 
  • Carl²: A security guard trying to get Carl Crashman and his friend Jamie to stop playing a video game demo in an electronics store:
    Security Guard: Beat it. I've got a walkie-talkie and I'm not afraid to use it.
  • Near the end of one CatDog episode, Eddie the Squirrel shows up with a tick in his hand, resulting in the following line:
    Shriek: He's got a tick!
    Eddie: And I'm not afraid to use it, either!
  • Chipn Dale Rescue Rangers: Dale, trying to intimidate a crab menacing him: Watch it, pal! I've got a thimble full of butter sauce and I'm not afraid to use it!"
  • In Chowder when the lead character is trying to fend himself against Panini.
    Chowder: Back off woman, I have a fish, and I'm not afraid to use it!
  • Ed, Edd n Eddy: When Edd seems someone intruding in his kitchen at night and eating the food out of his refrigerator, he's using a cactus named Jim for protection, and utters this line when the intruder is nowhere to be seen as a window blows open:
    Edd: I've got a cactus!
  • From Garfield and Friends, when Garfield is dealing with a Man-Eating Plant.
    Garfield: I've got a food processor and I know how to use it!
  • Hilda: Episode 11, Hilda and David find the homeless Nisse Tontu in the woods, and accidently startle him:
    Tontu: Who'se there? Show yourself! But let me tell you, I have a branch and I will use it.
  • I Am Weasel:
    I.M. Weasel: All right, nobody move! I've got a loaded baboon, and I'm not afraid to use it!
    I.R. Baboon: Click, click!
  • Kim Possible's got a website and she's not afraid to use it!
  • The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh: Piglet with his spring. He didn't know what it was and he said it while using the trope.
    Piglet: I've got a-a... I've got a- whatever it is, and I'm not afraid to use it.
  • The Smurfs: A Christmas Carol :
    Grouchy: I...I've got a blue belt in...in Smurf Fu and...and I'm not afraid to use it!
  • Taz-Mania: In "Tazmanian Lullaby", one of Francis' fellow tribesmen mocks his musical aspirations with the words "He's got an accordian and he's not afraid to use it!"

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