"What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch?"
— The first line of this masterpiece
"The Navy Seal Copypasta" is an extensive, over-the-top spiel by a person claiming to be a Navy Seal, in response to some perceived insult on the internet. It's often reposted with some of the words changed to more closely match the context. First found on 4chan, it soon became well known for its Large Ham writing style and trying way too hard to look threatening while likely having nothing to back it up.
For more history on this post and its origins, check this page
over on Know Your Meme.
The Post, In Its Entirety
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
"The Navy Seal copypasta" contains examples of...
- The Ace: He's the top sniper in the entire US armed forces, kiddo!
- Artistic License – Military:
- The top US sniper at the time of writing was Chris Kyle, who only had 150 kills.
- The US doesn't have spies that hunt down people for annoying comments on the internet. Though the writer did specify that it was a secret network of spies.
- A Navy SEAL would almost certainly not have access to the entire arsenal of the US Marine Corps, being in a separate command.
- Ax-Crazy: He's rather blatantly unhinged and violent, claims to have killed hundreds of people, and threatens to murder whoever angered him for a minor slight.
- Badass Boast: He sure knows how to sound threatening. Special mentions to the parts about the "precision" and the "storm that wipes out your life".
- Cluster F-Bomb: He swears in almost every sentence!
- Disproportionate Retribution: Tracking down and killing someone for an internet comment is a bit harsh, don't you think?
- Hair-Trigger Temper: He clearly has an extremely short fuse, considering that he's threatening to track you down and murder you in 700 different ways (with just his bare hands) just because you posted a comment that rubbed him the wrong way.
- I'll Kill You!: He threatens to kill someone, expanded upon in a long-winded rant.
- Internet Jerk: He'll kick your ass for that "clever" comment.
- Killer Gorilla: You know he's tough, because he's trained in Gorilla warfare.
- No Kill like Overkill: He vows to use the entire arsenal of the USMC to wipe out one random civilian for an internet comment. Scared yet?
- Retired Badass: He claims to be this, at least.
- Unstoppable Rage: There is no way to avoid being hunted down.
