“Luke: Plague son of Nurgle” is a forum-based Web Original story told by a 4chan /tg/ user only known as “Walrus” as well as a couple other users known as “Sirk” and “Nairda”, in what was meant to be a trilogy of horrible university roommates they had been forced to live with during their studies.
Luke (the titular plague son of Nurgle) however became the main attraction due to their eccentricity, lack of personal hygiene, lack of social skills and general horribleness.
The story can be read here https://1d6chan.miraheze.org/wiki/Luke
Be warned: you're going to need a lot of Brain Bleach.
Tropes found in the story:
- A Nazi by Any Other Name: Luke lists lighter skinned characters as “normal coloured”.
- And Then John Was a Zombie: The girl that discovered Lukes "stain" and lived in his room becomes as monstrously dirty as Luke himself.
- Blatant Lies: Luke was a compulsive liar and told several blatantly untrue stories about himself, the funniest one was when he claimed to be a master hacker that the secret service had hired to aid them with security; but then fell for a prank with a fake computer virus (Ginyu virus) and didn’t know how to deal with it.
- Body Horror: Two words: Shaved Palms. Walrus had resorted to using decoy playing card decks to avoid Luke from destroying them with his greasy hands, Luke protested that he couldn't have been at fault since he had shaved his palms the week before.
- Did this mean Luke grew hairs out of his palms?
- Did Luke intend to peel off a layer of skin in leu of washing his hands?
- Were Luke's hands so caked in filth that it took a razor blade to remove it?
- Bring My Brown Pants: Luke shat himself at least once in bed and did nothing to clean up other than flipping the bed over before leaving it there for a whole year. The stain was only discovered by some poor girl who tried to flip the mattress herself to get away from the filth of the rest of his room.
- Comically Inept Healing: Knowing how unbelievably gross Luke is and his general stupidity, god help the people he ends up treating if he managed to actually become a doctor (yes you heard us right, Luke was training to become a doctor).
- Dream Within a Dream: Luke’s dungeon master writing skills led to this with both the epilogue and the next few hours of gameplay being these; leading to mass confusion for the other players.
- Eldritch Location: Luke was so gross he had somehow managed to turn his room into this; since even when he had left and the window was left open the air itself was so stagnant it was said to resemble some sort of film that was somehow floating in place, the floor had also adopted a spongey texture.
- Evil Is Petty: Well, evil might be a bit extreme but he was definitely a Jerkass:
- Every time his roommates got something expensive or nice he would immediately get his parents to buy a more expensive or nicer version of it just so he could have the best thing.
- Every time he was insulted (or had his massive ego challenged in any way) he would spend every night for weeks playing Linkin Park at full volume all night to deprive them of sleep.
- He also enjoyed rummaging though everyone else’s stuff, while leaving a greasy stain on everything. Despite being very rich he also stole things regularly.
- Evil Tainted the Place: Even after Luke's room was cleansed, spending too long in it started to turn a formerly human girl into another Luke.
- Jerkass: Luke, named as "That Guy". See above. The biggest moment is when he found his former roommates and had the gall to call them out for their uncleanness (after they had to clean his 'nasty' room and he threw a hissy-fit after they basically told him good riddance.)
- Fauxreigner: Walrus pretends to be a german to avoid having a conversation with Luke later in life, he achieved this by putting on a cartoon accent and nothing else, Luke fell for it, or at least was confused enough to give Walrus time to escape.
- Get Out!: After Luke gets together with the other guy’s years after university and has the audacity to accuse the others of being messy roommates, he’s on the receiving end of one of these.
- Here We Go Again!: The girl who ended up inheriting Luke’s room begins to turn into his Distaff Counterpart.
- Humanoid Abomination: Luke’s sheer level of grossness transcends mere dirtiness, he is somehow capable of eating and talking with a mouth full of green rotten teeth without being in debilitating agony, his shit was described as a black tar like substance, his presence makes inanimate objects edge away from him and even years after he has left a location, sleeping in a room that he has occupied will turn you into a clone of him.
- Noodle Incident: Luke had apparently been gnawing on a windowsill before he had left his dorm.
- Said window had also acquired numerous greasy handprints during his stay there, despite him reportedly never opening the window.
- Occidental Otaku: Luke was this, every character he came up with was inspired by some form of anime. His dungeon master stories would also include large amounts of katanas and other Japanese things.
- The Pig-Pen: Luke had an odour that preceded him by several minutes his teeth were a dark green colour. He was said to have never showered or bathed in any way, implied to have never wiped his ass, never did dishes, washed his hands, never shaved and never performed any other form of personal hygiene during the year which the story took place; the only form of cleaning he got was when he was quite literally forced to wash by his parents (once every month or so).
- Porn Stash: Luke has his discovered pretty early in the story; predictably the type of porn he enjoyed was just of gross as he was (things such as scat, piss, gore, maggots ect.) Walrus theorises that Luke sexually enjoyed being disgustingly filthy.
- Rail Roading: When he played dungeon master his games were this to absurd degrees, to the point where everyone else was literally forced to do nothing for a significant amount of it (and most of it being a dream sequence).
- Scary Teeth: More like incredibly gross teeth; they were said to be dark green while his gums were black with red blisters growing on them.
- Scenery Gorn: Luke’s room was something straight out of Dante’s divine comedy.
- Screaming at Squick: How the putrid black stain on Luke’s bed was discovered by Walrus as some poor girl had overturned the mattress and screamed at the sight of it.
- Sticky Fingers: Literally and metaphorically, his hands were both incredibly sticky and he had a habit of stealing things for no reason.
- Spoiled Brat: Luke’s parents in the story are incredibly rich, at one point Walrus had saved up for a while to buy a top-of-the-line PC and was incredibly proud of it, Luke saw said pc and got his parents to buy a near identical one (but with slight improvements) just for the sake of having the best one.
- When Walrus, Luke and the other housemates were going to decide who gets which room in their new house, Luke called his family lawyers to scour out the inconsistencies in the housing contract, where the landlord cannot refuse, which granted Luke the largest room in the house.
- Stupid Evil: Luke numerous times played a chaotic evil character in dungeons and dragons, during said gameplay he would do things that would ruin his own experience, such as going up to a city guard and offering his assassination services.
- Another case in game would be when he intentionally let his team mates get killed by a swarm of tyranids so he could “take all the glory for himself” by winning the game on his own, despite there being no way of doing so without his team mate.
