Despite being a drama about a sociopathic Stalker with a Crush, YOU stil manages to have its moments, though usually Black Comedy.
All spoilers are unmarked.
Season 1
- In the Pilot, Joe says that you have to buy something else to mask the fact you enjoy Dan Brown. Nearer the end of the season, Dan Brown comes up again - this time, as the ideal choice of book to use as a toilet seat cover.
- Joe's reaction to Benji calling him "bro" from the same episode.
Joe: Bro? You waste of hair.- Joe's complete lack of self-awareness while stalking Beck, from being aghast that she has a huge window looking into her apartment ("Haven't you ever seen a horror movie?") to chastising her for walking to the train drunk because some "sicko" could have followed her.
- During the cab ride near the end of the Pilot, when Joe mentions Beck's poetry and Beck wonders how he knew she was a poet, the look on Joe's face as he fumbles for a believable answer is priceless.
Joe: Isn't every young writer in New York? - At the party when Joe and Beck have a talk on the balcony. She smiles at him, the romantic music swells, she leans in closer... then she plops her head on his shoulder and tells him that she's glad they're friends.Joe: For the love of Christ.
- While holding Benji hostage, Joe makes him do a blind taste test with three cups of soda to see if Benji can spot his own brand. Benji samples all three and says they all taste like cheap run-of-the-mill sodas. Joe states that they were all Benji's. Cue Benji throwing a hissy fit.
- Joe is utterly appalled that Peach is stalking Beck. Blissfully aware that not only is he doing the same thing, he actually crosses way more boundaries.
- This exchange, after Beck's made her friends aware of her and Joe's eight-second first time together.Joe: Did Beck tell you I started jogging?
Peach: Fun! Runner's high is better than sex. And for some, may last longer.
Joe, thinking: Touché, bitch.- Beck's monologue:
Beck, thinking: What was that? 8 seconds? (looks at Joe staring into space) Oh yeah, he's got that "Trump just took Pennsylvania" look. Say something, say..."Happens all the time, NBD." No, you'll sound like a slut. You could say "Let's order food", move past it. Is Grey Dog open late? (phone buzzes) Oh, thank God.- Joe fist-pumping when he sees Beck message her friends that he's worth a second shot. They (except for Peach) later cheer after their much more successful second time.
- When Beck goes to Joe for a second tryst, he has her journal, underwear and phone littered around his apartment. While making out with Beck, he manages to hide them away.
- After braining Peach with a rock Joe starts freaking out and is either justifying his actions or coming up with convoluted reasons as to how he wouldn't be caught.That's right [she] fell. An accident. It happens all the time. She fell. Into a rock over and over again. Okay, let's be real, she was attacked someone attacked her. But maybe they had a good reason, you ever think of that, detective? Shit! Detectives are real and DNA is a thing and I just hit that girl with a rock.
- A lot of Joe's narration is darkly hilarious. For instance, when he takes up jogging to stalk Peach:...and now your best friend is a stalker and a sociopath, and oh God, a liar. Runner's high is a myth. Why the hell did I take up jogging again? I'm in hell, Beck.
- When Joe is concussed and on medication, his narration suddenly takes on a sing-song tone.
- When Claudia is detoxing, Karen and Joe don't want Paco to see it (or Ron to find her), so they move her to the bookstore's basement... where Joe killed Benji months ago. Soon, Claudia starts rambling about seeing someone else in the cage.Karen: She thinks it's haunted.
Joe, thinking: Impossible. Benji was too lazy to run his own business, let alone haunt mine. - After Joe cheats on Karen with Beck on the cruise ship, the two are ashamed and say that they should never do so again. Cut to a montage of them having sex and calling Dr Nicky to say everything is fine.
- Later in the episode at Ethan and Blythe's housewarming party, Joe hesitates to help Ethan open beer bottles.
Joe, thinking: If I leave them alone, they will talk about me.Karen: Christ, babe, go. If you don't leave, we can't talk about you. - From "You Got Me Babe", Joe runs all the way to Beck's house lamenting that it's not raining because it would have made for the perfect romantic movie moment. He tries calling out to Beck, but she can't hear him so he taps her window with a pebble. It shatters and she screams.
Season 2
- With the darker aspects relegated to Joe's escapades with Will and Henderson, the season is general plays out like a straightforward Romantic Comedy.
- After Candace's unwelcome reunion with Joe, they go to a surprisingly artisan fast food restaurant, where Candace orders fries and a milkshake before continuing her business with Joe.
- One of Joe's very first interactions with Love.Love: Does this peach look like a butt to you?
- When Joe catches Ellie hanging out with Henderson and confronts her, she does not appreciate it:Ellie: "Oh my God, you're so kind, you're so protective, you're like my daddy." Is that what you like to hear? Do you want to FUCK ME, William?! No? Yeah, of course you do! Of course you do! (storms off) Everyone wants to FUCK the 15 year old!Joe: Yeesh. She's precocious, alright.
- After seeing the Hannibal Lecter-style setup Joe is keeping the real Will in, Jasper actually cracks up a bit, and says, in the most casual voice:Well, this is a first for me. You do realize you need psychiatric help, right?
- As Joe wishes for a sign to keep his relationship with Love platonic as he munches on a snack she left him, Forty arrives and starts talking about "Love's buns":Joe: Well, that's accidentally horrifying.
- The real Will says that he has a fiancée named Gigi in the Philippines. Joe says it disqualifies him from giving romantic advice and is the "least promising plan ever", but it turns out that Gigi actually is real.
- Joe meets Love's mom, Dottie, and she immediately starts talking about her vagina. In particular, she mentions that it suddenly became "drier than the Sahara Desert".
- Joe lamenting that Candace "resurrected like some sort of ginger vampire to suck my life away".
- "Murdered by an unhinged dominatrix. Remember me, Love."
- The entire scene is this, making us think that he was caught and about to be tortured by Candace, only to find out it was just the houseowner who was into bondage.
- His excuse that the whole thing is a misunderstanding because his girlfriend was into rape play. She checks his bags, finds a home depot receit and concludes that he's very vanilla and that this isn't his type of thing.
- Ellie wants to assure Will that he didn't do anything wrong regarding Delilah.I’m sorry, Will. My sister's a little upset and she’s also a bitch.
- After Forty persuades him to keep working at Anavrin and reassures him he still has a chance will Love, Joe reevaluates his perception of him:Forty: You're not one of those self-hating Jews, are you?Joe: I spoke too soon.
- Love's new makeout buddy is a dude named Milo, who is described as having an Avenger's body. Joe wants to deal with him the same way he dealt with Peach, by ambushing him on a hiking trail while jogging. However, Joe's physical incompetence prevents him from even keeping pace with Milo.
- On his part, Forty hates Milo "traversing Love's vagina" and does his best to get Joe back together with her.
- Ellie finds out that Joe and Delilah made love and goes up to him, telling him to "fuck anything else" and then threatens to run away if they do it in the laundry room. When she returns, she catches Joe just as he's taking a look at Delilah's ass, to Ellie's annoyance.
- Joe tries his hand at online dating. He has three dates: a vain lady who makes him takes pictures of her, an oversexed woman who asks about his fetishes and smooches him before setting up a sex session and a erudite alcoholic who starts sobbing as she quotes Hemingway.
- Gabe offers to do some acupuncture therapy on Joe, to which Joe snarks to himself that one of the needles in his neck might slip and turn him into Sloth from The Goonies. By the end of the session, Joe's blubbering like a wuss.
- That night, Joe throws up some "healthy" juice all over Delilah.
- Joe and Delilah decide to go out and get drunk, which leads to her admitting she thought he was a weirdo.Delilah: Okay, my turn. What was your first impression of me. Be honest.Joe: (thinking) Definitely do not be honest. (talking) I thought you seemed nice.Delilah: (laughs) Okay, you're such a liar.
- Joe and Delilah get picked up by the cops for having sex in an alley. Joe calls Forty for help, who gladly provides it, but is cracking up the whole time.I'm So Proud of You! [hangs up, still cackling] In an alley!
- The entirety of Joe's acid trip and the circumstances leading up to it, a very well-deserved Humiliation Conga:
- Firstly, Joe desperately needs to catch a flight to Mexico City; Delilah discovered his secrets and he needs to escape before she escapes the time-release handcuffs he placed on her and reports him to the police. His whole plan is sidetracked when Forty decides to drag Joe on his writing retreat.
- Forty and Joe are kidnapped by Russians, Joe freaking out that they were Jasper's friends seeking revenge. Forty explains that it's because he's not who Joe thinks he is. He reveals he's an addict and Joe angrily points out he already knows. Forty explains he's a gambling addict and Joe laments that his end is a result of someone else's stupidity.
- It turns out Forty planned the entire kidnapping and posted a Russian guard to confiscate Joe's passport and kill them if they tried to leave the room. Meanwhile, Ellie is around and can come and go as she pleases.
- Midway through their writeup, Forty introduces Joe and Ellie to his mixology innovation:
Joe: What are you drinking?Forty: Kombexy. It's kombucha and dexedrine. It's my secret weapon to staying focused. I'm diagnosed ADHD.Ellie: Of course you are.- Just as Forty finishes the (poorly written) script and Joe is almost let go, Ellie decides to pipe up and tells Forty that it sucks, to Joe's frustration.
Forty: Beck was real. She humped a pillow multiple times!- Prior to being dosed with four times the usual amount of acid, Forty heads to the bar by jumping off the window into a dumpster and Joe has to follow suit.
- As the drug trip hits, Joe sees a vision of the child version of himself. He wonders whether he should follow or, as every horror fan is screaming at him (as he says), not.
- It turns out the above was entirely unnecessary because there was a safe word.
Forty: Of course I have a safe word, I'm not crazy!- Joe is freaking out because he sees hallucinations of blood on his hands. He asks Forty about it and he responds he couldn't tell because his hands were lobsters.
- Joe is attacked by Calvin for breaking into the store and trying to steal things. The funny part is that Calvin is laughing it off the next day, as though it were nothing.
- Apparently, Joe was ranting that the peaches were mad at him. Well, one Peach was.
- Forty lampshades that incredulous fake name that is Amy Adam.Was Britney Spear taken?
- Joe's reaction to Love showing her true face.
- The ironic turn of events that Joe is trapped in his glass cage by a person madly in love with him.
- Love's plan to pin the blame of Henderson's death on Ellie, knowing that she won't actually be arrested because of her family's connections. Joe is very skeptical about it.Joe: Nope. Okay, I have to get free. That's clear.
Season 3
- Season 3 is by far the funniest of the seasons, as it really amps up the Black Comedy to absolutely insane, over-the-top levels; a key component of its comedy being that Joe of all people is the Only Sane Man among the suburban couples.
- Cary Conrad. He's very loud, quick to get his clothes off so everybody can see his muscles and his interactions with Joe are so vague you're not entirely sure if he's coming onto him or not. Once you find out Cary and Sherry are both bisexual swingers, it's not the least bit surprising.
- Joe and Love see a couple's counselor. She reassures them that for all their anger and frustration with each other, they are not killers. Joe and Love both look at her like "Shit, we picked a dumb one".
- During a session with the counselor, we get another dose of pitch-black comedy in the form of a flashback.Joe: Yeah, well like I said, nothing was ever going to happen with this woman. But, after the fight I felt obligated...to get rid of her for good.Counselor: "Obligated"?Joe: Forced.[...]Counselor:: How did that make you feel?(Cut to Joe dragging and disposing Natalie's body)Joe: Fuck Love. Fuck her. Fuck this. Fuck whoever made these fucking bags.
- After Love knocks Gil out with a rolling pin and drags him into their storage unit, Joe paces around the unit waiting for him. Meanwhile, he thinks to himself that he should acknowledge and appreciate that Love did not murder him and it "represents growth".
- Gil is surprisingly affable when he wakes up, leading Joe to muse that Love may have assaulted the one person in their neighbourhood who would forgive them for it.
- Gil defends his choice not to vaccinate his daughters, even suggesting that it was beneficial that Henry caught it as he built immunity. Joe responds by subtly cracking his knuckles.
- Theo holds a boom box over his head outside Love's house to win her over and justifies it by saying "this is how your generation flirts".Love: First of all, I’m not that old…
- Made funnier by the fact that Theo's actor is older in real life than Love's.
- Joe and Marienne's bonding is momentarily interrupted by the sprinkler above them going off.
- Joe's response when he learns Sherry and Cary's safeword(s): Hukuna Matata.Joe: Disney should sue these people.
- Pretty much every scene involving Sherry and Cary after they're imprisoned in Joe and Love's glass cage, with them alternating between placating Love and screaming at each other.
- "I AM A FEMINIST!"
- A very obvious Chekhov's Gun early in the series: Joe and Love each hide a key in the basement cage just in case. When they finally come into play, it's when Cary and Sherry are locked in the cage and Sherry hysterically (and successfully) tears the whole place apart to find the key.
- At the end, right after The Reveal that Joe is in Paris, his inner dialogue narrates to Marienne and calls her "mon amor".
Season 4
- Joe bemoans that he's in the lowest form of literature; a whodunit.
- Despite initially dismissing Simon's art as lame, Joe is soon mesmerised by the eyes of his cat painting.Joe: Okay. I'm the asshole. Simon is a genius...
- As he gazes into the cat's eyes, the same music that played when he first saw Beck plays. When he talks to Rhys, Joe's eyes are noticeably teary.
- After the stalker threatens Kate, Joe takes it upon himself to "protect" her, noting that she seems to be searching for the best places to be murdered in London as she visits a 300 year old crypt.
- The stalker taunts Joe, saying that they believe that Joe gets off on killing. When Joe ends up killing someone later, he insists to himself that his "dick has never been softer".
- As he buries his victim in an empty grave, Joe muses on whether to eulogize him, but decides that his victim probably wasn't a Didion fan.
- While Joe and Kate are trying to dispose of a body, Phoebe waltzes in so she can whine about her problems to them. Kate gets her to leave by telling her that she and Joe are about to fuck.
