Funny / Weight of the World

Warning: Spoilers Off applies to Funny pages. Proceed at your own risk.

Weight of the World

• The first meeting with Penny. She fails to understand America's figures of speech and metaphors. When she departs, America struggles to finish his goodbye ^note  He didn't want to call her "dude" and then have to explain why he called her that. and accidentally calls her his friend. Penny immediately declares them friends and leaves America to smack his head into the countertop. Canada's following comment that America is lucky Penny did not leave believing she was his girlfriend cinches it.
• The twins' first day at Beacon, America cannot locate any of the classrooms but immediately finds the cafeteria and teacher's lounge. The next morning he steals coffee for himself and Canada from the latter.
• Canada's inability to recall Team RWBY and JNPR's names at first. His point of view constantly changes their names during their first meeting. He questions whether he is recalling their names right before internally declaring that of course he is correct. Then America immediately calls Nora by her name.
  It was Numa, wasn't it? Of course it was. Canada was great at remembering names.
  "Nora, right?" America asked.
  Not Numa then. Crap, Canada thought.
• When Ruby starts describing the breach battle with sound effects, a horrified Canada wonders if Ruby is America's counterpart from another dimension.
• America's reaction to Port. He mutters under his breath about how crazy and boring Port is as he squeezes Canada’s shoulders while saying he (America) "isn't that bad, right Mattie? Right Mattie?" Yang snaps him out of it.
• Yang and Canada fight over the latter's cup of coffee while Ruby and America look on in deadpanned resignation.
• Operation H.A.M. ^note  Help Alfred and Matthew.

The Shattered Soul

• While scolding her and saying she will catch a cold, England pulls Ruby's hood up, leaving her with a bewildered, whiplashed expression.

The Depths of Deception

• The kitchen scene. America comes home after his doctor's appointment to find the nations in his kitchen. They intended to make dishes from their homeland for America to make him feel more comfortable, but ended up getting in each other's way, resulting in a huge mess. The scene must be read to be believed. A snippet:
  The kitchen was in chaos. China and a brown-haired man— Romano?— were arguing, France looked ready to strangle Italy, Japan and a blond-haired nation—Germany?— were covered in flour, the white-haired nation— most definitely Prussia— was laid out on the floor, and Russia stood in the corner, cackling madly. Red stuff dripped from the ceiling and after a moment of pure horror America recognized it as pasta sauce.
  Some type of batter was sprayed on the walls and cabinet along with the before-mentioned flour, with the only clear spot around Russia. If America did not know any better, he would swear the nation scared the mess away from him with pure intimidation. The thing that was smoking was revealed to be something in a pot on the stovetop. Since everyone else was standing around frozen like idiotic statues, America shoved his way past Canada and grabbed the pot, putting out the fire with a wave of his hand before dousing its contents in the sink for good measure.
  • Even better, the nations (whose food survived) fight over who gets to give America their food first. America's deadpan reaction (and eventual laughter), and Australia's dry exasperation just make it better.
  Australia: And they say I'm the crazy one. (leaves)
• During the World Conference: The nosy nations' attempts to figure out why America is acting differently is hilariously pathetic. He immediately knows what they are trying to do, and some of them (like Denmark) don't even bother with subtlety. The whole scene would not be out of place in canon Hetalia.
• After the above, Lithuania asks a clearly stressed America if he is alright. America's response?
  America (internally): DAMMIT. NO I AM NOT OKAY. I AM NOT THE SLIGHTEST BIT OKAY. WHY WON'T PEOPLE LEAVE ME ALONE?!
  America (verbally and with a forced smile): "I'm great. Just a little… overwhelmed."
• When the nations realize Pyrrha is the girl who returned with the others through the portal and gawk at her, America throws up his hands and declares he's going back into isolation.

The Atrocities of Atlas

• Ruby has to stop Weiss from— in her words— "performing Boarbatusk Attack: The Sequel" on another trophy wife.
• When a woman insinuates the guards should arrest Sun and Blake for no reason, Ruby resists the urge to punch her in the face by thinking about Yang and Qrow's disappointment if she were arrested. She then realizes they would be proud of her and adjusts her thoughts to how her dad would be disappointed if she was arrested.
• America tells Penny 2.0 they need to turn out the lights. She proceeds to stick a sword in the electrical outlet and her hair puffs up.

The Charlatan of Choice

• Penny joins America in the "important ritual" to wake up Canada. She admits flipping his mattress on top of him is effective, but giving him an electric shock would be even more so. Canada squeaks in terror.
• Penny thinks England's ability to make any dish explode would be beneficial in combat situations.
• The pun battle at the breakfast table and Jaune's increasingly annoyed reactions. Ruby's overdramatic horror when she accidentally says a pun is particularly hilarious.
• Apparently a drunk Qrow taught Ozpin how to play fighting games. Oscar uses Ozpin's knowledge to kick Australia's butt.
• Japan beats Canada at Remnant: The Game. Yang is delighted someone dethroned the evil Emperor Curly and hugs a horrified Japan. He begs her to let him go and flails pathetically, reminding Ruby of the poor cat Yang "tried to hug to death when she was twelve".
• Yang and Australia's combo attack is named "Boomeryang". (Goddammit, Barb!)

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