Funny / Wanted

The comic book series

• "LEE HARVEY OSWALD!"
• This bit of Black Comedy:
  Wesley: Enjoy your goat fucking, Mr. Rictus.
  Rictus (indignant): I don't fuck goats, Mr. Gibson, I make love to them!
• Johnny Two-Dicks. JOHNNY.TWO-DICKS.
  • And according to Professor Seltzer, it's a "thirteen-inch mastermind".
• The last phrase in the last panel: THIS IS MY FACE WHILE I FUCK YOU IN THE ASS!

The movie

• Fox comments on Wesley's Verbal Tic.
  Wesley: [having turned around to suddenly see Fox standing next to him] ...I'm sorry?
  Fox: You apologize too much.
  Wesley: ...Uh... I'm... sorry for that.
• Wesley being in a constant state of panic as Cross chases him and Fox in a Car Chase Shootout.
  • Cross using a pet food truck, with maybe 20 bobbleheads of cats and dogs on its dashboard, and doesn't switch to another vehicle during the entire chase. It somehow manages to be in better condition than Fox's sports car by the end of the chase.
• When given the task of shooting the wings off some flies, Wesley mistakes the order for some kind of Koan.
  Sloan: [Hands Wesley a pistol] Shoot the wings off the flies.
  Wesley: [Freaked out, stammering, and panicking] I- I d- I don't know what that means!
  Sloan: [Looking dumbfounded and in a tone like he's speaking to a child] Shoot. The wings. Off the flies.
• Wesley saying "I'm sorry!" while shooting a guy (from above, in a spinning car).
• Wesley slamming a keyboard into his former best friend Barry's face, leading to a slow motion close-up of letters flying off the board toward the screen, spelling "FUCK YO" with Barry's broken tooth forming the "U".
  • In a Hilarious in Hindsight way, we now have the hilarious mental image of Young!Professor X laying the smack down on Star-Lord.
  • If you want another mental image: Young!Professor X just battered Mario with a keyboard.
• Wesley waking up after his second dip in the Healing Factor bath.
  Wesley: I feel, I feel, I feel, I feel... [surprised] I feel kinda good!

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