Funny / The Miracle at Palaven

• Just before the deployment for SLENDER SCALPEL, a turian Corporal in the 52nd Recon Legion develops a cough and is told to sit out the mission. He goes, "Fuck that", and jumps onto a shuttle at the last minute, so that he can go to war with his buddies... and finds out he got on the wrong shuttle.
• How do krogan and turian troops at Firebase Arterius pass the time? Come up with even more ridiculous and inventive ways of blowing up Reapers. Let the turians play with the Graal spike thrower shotguns; The turians get a kick at how gruesome it is on its targets, the krogan get a kick out of watching the turians try to handle the recoil and aim leading. Or maybe roll useless fuel barrels down the hill, watching it squish hapless husks, and then shoot the barrel at the bottom. Or maybe take a brace of grenades, set them to proximity fuse, and roll them down the hill...
• Urdnot Bakar, a krogan commando, saves Maximus Benessius from getting hit with a Thanix Cannon, though he gets his hump burned off in the process. As he's being medevaced, he does his best to cuss at and chew out Maximus for being a dumbass. Years later, Bakar is a cadet at Cipritine Hill Services Academy, with the goal of taking part in the Krogan military reformation... and his drill instructor is Maximus.
• Patrus Castellus, XO of the carrier Example, takes it upon himself to visit the family of Captain Irenna Ixius, who has been declared dead after a Dying Moment of Awesome, to inform them personally that she had been declared KIA, after 3 years of being declared MIA. Except that the person greeting him at the door is Captain Ixius herself, who tells him she didn't get the memo.
• Service Chief Solana Optimi was lucky enough to make it to the surface alive in her orbital drop glider during the opening of FORWARD FLAME, despite a crash-landing. However... the location of her landing site was rather embarassing: a sex shop. Another nearby landed soldier found it hilarious, until she threatened to shove a toy up his ass if he didn't stop laughing and help her out.