Funny / The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged)

• An index card mix-up gives us this gem:
  Shakespeare invaded Poland September 1st, 1939, thus precipitating World War II. I didn't know that...
• All of Shakespeare's tragic heroines barfing on the audience members before they die.
  • "I threw up on that guy in the hat."
• Their rendition of Titus Andronicus. One would think that making such a violent play funny would be impossible. The Reduced Shakespeare Company found a way... by performing it like a cooking program.
  Titus Andronicus: When he is dead, which should be... (Lavinia kills her rapist) ...Now.
• Soothsayer: Beware the Ides of March...ooo...
  Caesar: What the hell are the ides of March?
  Soothsayer: Well, that's the 15th of March!
  Caesar: Why that's today! *Hrk*
• Shakespeare's histories performed as an American football game.
  • When King Lear comes in, we get this gem:
  Adam: Fictional character in the field, Lear is disqualified!
• "Cut the crap, Hamlet! My Biological Clock Is Ticking and I want babies now!"
• Hamlet, backwards.
  • "OOB"
  • The Brick Joke when Ophelia drowns. The actor takes a cup of water, splashes it in his face, and walks off. When they do it backwards, he comes onstage and spits a mouthful of water into an empty cup.

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