Tumblr moments
- It looks like ponies don't really like Survival Horror games.
- Does this count for the "Wet Ponies" meme?
- Pinkie Pie: Breaking the fourth wall and thinking with portals.
- Who wouldn't be scared in this situation?
- Never miss a welcome party from Pinkie Pie, or else you'll receive her surprise edition.
- There's nothing funnier than a pony trying to wear pants.
- Because we all know that this is how the real Rainbow Dash would act in this situation
- Nothing here, just a talking bush
- Looks like Princess Luna was really having fun inside.
- Some replies can be really funny too.
- Twilight's favorite three human scientists? Albert Einstein, Reed Richards and Emmet Brown.
- And this is how Human Studies 101 with Lyra started.
Things I’m not allowed to do in Equestria
- #1: Gangnam Style is not the new Equestrian anthem, and neither is the coreography considered “the new salute to the flag”.
- #2: I won’t leave alone and/or without surveillance anypony who surfs the Internet. We don’t want another incident like the last time.
- #3: Fanfiction isn’t considered literature. The next works are forbidden: Fallout Equestria, Cupcakes, Rainbow Factory and The Conversion Bureau.
- #3.5: My Little Dashie is NOT a biography of Rainbow Dash past.
- #4: There’s no such thing as a “trolling Cutie Mark”.
- #5: Laziness is not considered a human talent that must be practiced 24/7.
- #6: Adapting to Equestria’s costums doesn’t mean I’m allowed to walk around naked.
- #7: Ponies wearing clothes is not the same as nude humans.
- #8: I can’t enlist Spike’s help for reprising Dragonheart, How to train your dragon and such.
- #9: I can’t send Spam to Princess Cestia about enlarging her horn.
- #10: Fluttershy’s chickens can’t be used to descend high ledges like in Legend of Zelda.
- #11: Refering to #10, I can’t try it with pegasi.
- #11.2: Not even Rainbow Dash, even if she dares me to do it.
- #11.3: Scootaloo is a pegasus, not a chicken. Refer to #10 and #11.
- #11.4: Just don’t do it with any items or living beings that have wings.
- #12: I can’t tell Lyra that a centaur is the result of a night of passion between a pony and a human after its parents had a crazy night.
- #12.5: That goes for anything formed by two different creatures.
- #13: Pinkie Pie is not allowed to watch Project X and any other movie consisting of a macro party.
- #14: I won’t send love letters to Rarity and sign them as “Your biggest fan, Prince Blueblood”.
- #14.2: Neither as Fancypants.
- #14.3: Or “Your secret admirer”.
- #14.4: Just don’t write fake love letters.
- #15: I can’t hide my arm under my shirt and run all over the town screaming “I managed to escape from Nighmare Moon! Run before she devours you!”.
- #15.2: Especially in Nightmare Night.
- #15.3: Neither can I leave a mannequin of myself at the base of the statue and then spend the entire night sleeping in Fluttershy’s cottage.
- #16: I can’t write fake love letters and make it look like X pony sent it to Y pony and viceversa. Refer to #14.4.
- #17: Asking Rainbow Dash to perfom a tornado to clean the trees from their leaves goes against the idea of Running of the Leaves.
- #17.2: A vacuum cleaner goes against the rules too.
- #17.3: Just don’t do anything aside of running through the forest.
- #18: Just because in Earth we don’t celebrate Winter Wrap-Up it doesn’t mean I’m allowed to evade any responsibilites to help the other ponies.
- #19: I can’t wear scary Heavy Metal shirts in presence of anypony.
- #19.2: Especially fillies and Fluttershy.
- #19.3: Just don’t wear scary shirts. Period.
- #20: I can’t bring any copies of Twilight inside the library.
- #20.5: Giving copies to everypony and telling them that it’s a biography of Twilight Sparkle counts towards #20.
- #21: No matter how cute I think ponies are when they wear socks, I can’t go around hugging them.
- #21.5: Especially if I don’t hug stallions too. That’s sexist.
- #22: I can’t point at random ponies and scream “There’s a changeling around here!”.
- #22.2: Especially if one of them is a twin brother/sister.
- #22.3: Even though it was eventually discovered that I was right every time.
- #23: I can’t bring movies and make everypony think it’s a recorded footage of a real event.
- #23.5: Especially horror movies like Cloverfield.
- #24: I’m not allowed in Twilight’s laboratory under the library.
- #24.2: Neither can I ask somepony to enter in my place and bring me things.
- #24.3: Or press any big/red/suspicious buttons.
- #25: Baking suggestive cakes for Princess Celestia is not funny.
- #25.5: Especially if they involve the Mane Six.
- #26: I can’t place Rarity’s mannequins inside her bed while she sleeps.
- #26.5: That includes taking photographs and showing them to her friends.
- #27: I can’t use a “You must be this tall to join this line” sign as tall as me to be the first one at anything.
- #27.5: No matter how many times everypony falls for it.
- #28: I can’t have suggestive/erotic dreams if Princess Luna pays me a visit.
- #28.5: Even though I can’t control my dreams. Just because everypony can it doesn’t mean humans can do it too.
- #29: I can’t use Poison Joke to make pranks.
- #29.5: Neither can I hide them along with a dozen of blue roses and give them to other couples on Hearts and Hooves day.
- #30: I can’t “borrow” one hundred of Zecora’s rings to see if I can get an extra life.
- #31: I can’t place Poison Joke in Angel’s salad
- #31.5: Even though that rabbit deserves it.
- #32: I can’t mention how much I love meat in front of Fluttershy.
- #33: I can’t say that Princess Celestia and Discord act like an old married couple.
- #33.2: They’re only offended because I called them “old”.
- #33.3: Even though they really are old.
- #34: I can’t ride other ponies.
- #34.2: Not because it’s considered offensive, but because they can barely support my weight.
- #34.3: Only Princess Celestia, Luna and Cadence can support my weight, but they’re too busy with royal business to take part in such childish games.
- #34.4: Even though Luna really loves to play, working is her first priority, no matter how much she wants to take a break.
- #35: No matter how well can I make a fake document, I’m not a doctor.
- #35.2: Or a veterinary.
- #35.3: And I can’t go around giving hugs because it’s been scientifically proved to cure loneliness.
- #35.4: Any report written by me can’t be considered scientific nor official by any institution.
- #35.5 Especially if it’s been confirmed by any institution founded by me.
- #36: I can’t jump over Ponyville’s roofs wearing a sweater hoodie trying to emulate Altaïr Ibn-La’Ahad.
- #36.2: Or Ezio Auditore da Firenze.
- #36.3: Or Connor Kenway.
- #36.4: Just don’t jump over the roofs.
- #37: I can’t keep a Timberwolf as my pet and call him “Woody”.
- #38: Earth ponies are not Muggles.
- #38.5: Whatever that word means, it can’t be a good thing.
- #39: I can’t go with Rarity in search of gems and later sell them in Earth.
- #40: I can’t carry around a typewriter to save my game.
- #40.2: Or banana coins.
- #40.3: Or play the magic flute to call a Moguri.
- #40.4: We’re still studying how the heck did a Moguri appear from nowhere.
- #41: I can’t sing “That old grey mare is not my old grey mare” with Derpy.
- #41.5: Especially if my pants are down.
- #42: I can’t cut the apples from Applejack’s orchad as a training to play Ninja Fruit.
- #42.5: That goes for all the fruit I can find in Equestria.
- #43: I can’t use a Master Ball to capture Celestia.
- #43.5: Although she feels honored that I consider her a Legendary type.
- #44: Refering to #43, Pinkie Pie can’t tag along.
- #45: The party canon is for parties. It can’t be used to play Paintball.
- #45.5: Neither can I pour an entire bag of flour and make everypony think it’s snowing in the middle of summer.
- #46: I can’t dress one of Rarity’s mannequins with a smokin and place it in front of the Everfree Forest to make everypony think it’s Slendermane.
- #47: Just because I always wear a full set of clothes, that doesn’t make me the richest creature of Canterlot.
- #48: I shouldn’t mention that I like oranges more than apples in front of Applejack.
- #49: Even though ponies don’t wear pajamas in a pajama party, that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t wear mine.
- #49.5: Especially if Lyra is attending the party.
- #50: I can’t replace sugar cubes with salt cubes in Pinkie Pie’s chocolate. We don’t want another incident like last time.
- #51: Danger is not my middle name.
- #51.5: Even if I legally change it, it won’t be considered official.
- #52: I can’t mix Zecora’s potions to see what will happen.
- #53: I can’t give new ideas to get a Cutie Mark to the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
- #54: There isn’t a Cutie Mark for playing videogames.
- #54.5: And even if it existed, it wouldn’t count as a profitable job.
- #55: Belonging to another world doesn’t automatically make me an ambassador.
- #55.2: Or a duke.
- #55.3: Or a prince.
- #55.4: Or a king.
- #55.5: I can’t have any other title aside of “visitor with special rights”.
- #56: Luna game is forbidden all over Equestria.
- #56.5: That goes for Story of the Blanks too.
- #57: Refering to #56.5, there isn’t a hidden village of blank flanks within the Everfree Forest.
- #58: The staircase of the Crystal Empire tower is not a landslide.
- #58.5: That means that I can’t sell tickets for everypony to take a ride.
- #59: Heavy Metal is not the best kind of music to play at 3 A.M.
- #59.2: Especially in Celestia’s room while she sleeps.
- #59.3: Even if Luna gives me permission. Just because she rules at night doesn’t mean she’s allowed to change the laws at will.
- #60: I must wear a swimsuit whenever I visit the spa.
- #60.5: Only ponies and any other creatures from Equestria are allowed to be nude.
- #61: Gum does not belong on the underside of the library table.
- #61.2: Or on the door.
- #61.3: The floor.
- #61.4: In the shelves.
- #61.5:Gum is banned from the library.
- #62: I’m not allowed to host a karaoke night in the library.
- #62.5: Or anywhere else aside of the karaoke bar.
- #63: I can’t send prank letters to Celestia.
- #64: If the doorbell rings, I am not allowed to say “Bring out yer dead!”
- #64.2: I can’t say “Ding dong, the Witch is dead!” neither.
- #64.3: Especially if Rarity is present or within earsdrop territory.
- #64.4: Anything aside of “Please, enter”, “the door is open” or “it’s your turn” is not allowed.
- #65: I am not allowed to graffiti any interior or exterior surface of the library or any other building, for that matter.
- #65.5: Sticking stuff on the walls of my side of the guests room is okay as long as I do not damage said walls.
- #66: I am not allowed to leave my homework around the library.
- #66.2: Twilight will finish it, and it makes my teachers suspicious.
- #66:3: She will make fun of me when I have trouble understanding a “simple” concept. Like trigonometry.
- #67: I can’t blame anypony else when I scream like a little girl.
- #68: I can’t replace Twilight’s books with edited versions where all the answers are 42.
- #69: I can’t give her a book about networking computers and then laugh at her face when she asks me “What’s a computer?”.
- #70: I can’t laugh at everypony an call them dinosaurs just because in my world our technology is far advanced than Equestria.
- #71: I cannot flirt with Princess Luna.
- #71.2: She’s a 1000+ year old Princess (even though she preserves herself pretty well). It wouldn’t work.
- #71.3: Besides, Celestia never falls for it. It stopped being funny after the first time.
- #72: Doors are locked for a reason.
- #72.2: Rarity doesn’t appreciate me kicking her bedroom door down at 3 A.M. to suggest a disco inferno.
- #72.3: Even if Rainbow Dash does the kicking.
- #73: I am not allowed to peek inside the spa when Rainbow Dash is showering.
- #73.2: Even though she’s always nude.
- #73.3: Even if she does have a lovely plot.
- #73.4: I am certainly not allowed to take pictures and send them to everyone I know.
- #73.5: But Rarity said I could look in at her anytime I like.
- #74: I can’t say “Give her jewels. Bitches love jewels” when we talk about Rarity’s birthday gift.
- #75: Bananas are not toys.
- #75.5: Princess Celestia has been informed of this too.
- #76: I am not allowed to say “But we do this in Earth all the time” whenever I break a rule.
- #76.5: Quoting “Rules were made to be broken” doesn’t work.
- #77: Dracula isn’t hiding inside the old castle of the Everfree Forest.
- #77.2: And the villagers aren’t lying to me.
- #77.3: Even though telling me things like “GET A SILK BAG FROM THE GRAVEYARD DUCK TO LIVE LONGER” makes no goddam sense.
- #78: I can’t blame Discord for all the problems in Equestria.
- #78.5: Even though he admitted that most of them are his own fault.
- #79: I can’t tell horror stories because I always end up scaring everypony.
- #79.5: Especially stories about how we sacrifice horses when they break their legs.
- #80: I can’t keep a manticore as a pet.
- #80.2: Or a changeling.
- #80.3: ESPECIALLY a changeling.
- #81: Playing with Gummy doesn’t automatically turn me into the Crocodile Hunter
- #82: Drawing a fake Cutie Mark with a marker on the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ flank is not funny.
- #83: I can’t threaten anypony with Dark magic.
- #83.2: Or White Magic.
- #83.3: Or Red Magic
- #83.4: I can’t threaten with any color of magic.
- #84: I can’t make Wanted posters with the face of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
- #84.2: Even if it was the Cutie Mark Crusaders idea.
- #84.3: Even though they’re bullies, they deserved it, and
- #85: I can’t play the Jaws theme and throw Gummy wearing a fake shark flipper whenever somepony bathes in the spa.
- #85.2: Or play the Psychosis theme when Rarity is taking a shower.
- #85.3: But I can play “Don’t stop me now” when Rainbow Dash runs. She loves it.
- #86: Nopony is conspiring against me. Yes they do. No, we don’t.
- #87: I can’t make any space jokes from Portal 2 if Princess Luna is present.
- #87.5: Mostly because she joins the fun and always uses her Royal Canterlot voice, destroying everything in sight.
- #88: I can’t ask Fancypants why does he have such name if he isn’t wearing any pants.
- #89: Body paint is not considered clothing.
- #90: Beating Trauma Center doesn’t automatically turn me into a doctor.
- #90.2: Especially since I used cheats to beat the game.
- #90.3: I’m only allowed to take care of minor injuries and placing bandages if there’s a real doctor watching.
