Funny / Lexx

• "May His Merciful Shadow fall upon... me, preferably."
• Insane!Kai's Badass Boast from "Wake the Dead" is darkly hilarious once he gets to the end of it:
  Kai: (crazed) I've killed mothers with their babies. I've killed great philosophers, proud young warriors, and revolutionaries. I've killed the evil, the good, the intelligent, the weak, and the beautiful. I have done this in the service of His Divine Shadow and his predecessors, and apparently the fun never ends!
• Zev and 790's complete lack of sympathy with Stan's threat to kill himself in "Super Nova."
  Zev: Stan? What are you doing [on that ledge]?
  790: I believe he's attempting to put an end to his pathetic life. But he seems to be taking all day!
  Stan: Don't try and stop me, Zev.
  Zev: Oh, I wasn't planning to.
  Stan: I'm going to jump. And then you'll be alone. Drifting in a space craft you can't control through an empty universe. What do you think about that?
  790: I think you should get on with it!
  Zev: Makes sense to me. Realistically, Stan, there's just not much to like about you. You're old... unattractive...
  Stan: Define "unattractive!"
  790: Well! Where to begin?
  Zev: ... self-centered... vain... weak-willed... treacherous...
  Stan: But if you'd just give me a chance, one little chance, maybe you'd learn to love me!
  Zev: Mmm... No.
• From "Terminal":
  Dr. Kazan: Your home will be the entire universe, aboard the Lexx, with me at your side! We'll be the crew, you and me! Be bold, Zev, don't compromise yourself with sentiment! Together we can own the universe! You know this is what you want! You are one of the chosen, we both are! Seize your fate!
  Zev: ...Can't we just have sex instead?
• Zev: What kind of robot are you?
  790: I am a robot that wants to live in your underpants.
• 790's verdict on Stan when performing a medical analysis of him: "There does not appear to be anything wrong with him, aside from being utterly repulsive in every way."
• Mantrid's gurning facial expressions when he's taunting Brizon in the episode of the same name have to be seen to be believed.
  • The childish insult-fest between the two of them is also a ridiculously amusing moment in an otherwise dark episode.
• Kai being turned into a complete and utter Cloud Cuckoolander in "Twilight".
• "What does the word "cancel" mean, Stanley?"
• Stan: (regarding Kai) He was alive dead for two thousand years, but this time he was dead dead! Really!
  Bog: Two thousand? That's a lot of birthday p-p-parties.
• Stan getting the Lexx to call him by an assortment of ridiculous titles in "Giga Shadow".
  Stan: Lexx, when you eat, can you separate out the yummy stuff from the nasty indigestible bits?
  Lexx: Yes, Stanley the Perfect, the mighty and terrible champion of the oppressed.
  Stan: And - unjustly maligned majestical being!
  Lexx: And unjustly maligned majestical being.
  Stan: Cool...!
  • Cranked up when Stan realizes the third-person aggrandizing is becoming more of a hassle than it's worth, and (accidentally) is now:
  Lexx: As you command Stan, Stan, only Stan.
• 790 on distress signals: "They only lead to trouble, so I always ignore them."
• "SLUT GERMS! SLUT GERMS!"
• "Metalhead!" "Leatherass!"
• In Super Nova, a horribly injured Stan stumbles into one of the Brunnen-G's memory recorders, which causes him to relive the memory of the person who he was touching. The Time Prophet uses this opportunity to relay a message to him through a confused miner, who just wanted information on a business venture and is now being bombarded with urgent information for a guy who won't exist for several thousand years. What's hilarious is the fact that Stanley forgets a detail and walks back, and the Prophet foresaw his blunder and shouted the detail at him.
• In "Tunnels" the character of Doctor Rainbow played by one of the creators Lex Gigeroth, he offers to cut off Stan's 'unnecessary parts' to help him. Rainbow is later stabbed by another evil "doctor", Stan escapes and makes an understated remark "Stupid doctors!"
• Kai instructs the living on the nature of the dead.
  Kai: The dead do not feel stress.
  The dead do not feel pain.
  The dead do not feel disgust.
  The dead do not get frustrated.
  The dead do not get distracted.
  The dead do not get high.
  The dead do not sleep.
  The dead do not contain protein.
  The dead do not eat.
  The dead do not have stomachs.
  The dead do not poo.
  The dead do not fear needles.
  The dead do not care about acting.
  The dead do not care about tasty things.
  The dead do not normally suck blood.
  The dead do not "squeeze and please."
  The dead do not "shoo-bop-a-loo-la."
  The dead do not think the way you think they think.
  • What do the dead do?
  Kai: The dead are unpredictable.
  Stan: The dead are weird.
• In "Luvliner", the male prostitute Xev tries to hook up with falls in love with her, and decides that theirs will be an epic love, with lots of romance and courtship and taking it slow. Xev does not care about love and romance and just wants to have sex already. She ends up trying to wrestle him into doing the deed already.
• In Stan Down The goofy cat puppet possessed by a carrot probe.
  • President Priest tries to cover up the Lexx's destruction of Orlando which he collaborated in a botched plan to betray and kill his Master, Prince. He releases a video with him poorly disguised as a generic Cuban general, taking credit, all whilst the Washington monument appears in the background.
• In "Bad Carrot", Kai needs to prong all the crew up their buttocks to see if they have been possessed by the carrot probe on the loose. Prince tries to weasel out of it and say he's a deity and that it's unnecessary. The crew pressure him to take the prong and we have a scene where all the principal characters are pronged, with the camera focusing on their facial expressions, and the 'prince of darkness' expression is left for last.
  • The carrot finally tries to take over Kai, but he has such absolute control over his body that he is able to crush it while it is inside him. He then excretes it, leading to..
    Stanley: So, dead man - how was your first bowel movement in 6000 years?
    Kai: Dry.
• "Dutch's Treat" Lexx eating Holand for a treat. "Oh goody, a tasty Dutch treat" and a stereotypical shot of a Hollander painting some bread in front of a windmill before he notices the Lexx about to eat the country
• In "Moss", Cloud Cuckoo Lander General Moss of the terrorist group the America Freedom Rangers, forces the trio in a Kangaroo Court for allegedly being Prince's associate and ally, he plays all the roles in court, wearing a wig or glasses to differiate the roles.
• In "769", 790 teams up with Prince to construct a body so he can have sex with Kai. Later a moth builder/790 hybrid is escorted to the oval office where Prince orders a group of marines to drop their trousers and 790 chooses the biggest 'equipment' to retrieve.
• In "Yo Way Yo", President Priest trying to weasel out of fighting the plant aliens on a fighter jet, by saying he forgot his toothbrush and the naive Bunny offering him one she has.
  • Doctor Longbore tells his fellow scientists there is not enough space to join him on his voyage to escape the Earth's predicted destruction. They defy him and tell him he's only choosing the good looking women to join him, Longbore feebly makes excuses and says they were chosen for who passed his histocompatable smell test and then uses a bit of Insane Troll Logic to suggest their immature and aggressive objections is why he wouldn't have chosen them.
• In K-Town, Stan remarking on a pattern throughout the series, ''She'll never learn. She will never, ever, never ever ever learn. Never ever. She goes off. Somebody comes along, tries to eat me..."
  • The awkward humour of Xev trying to reset Kai's rods, located in his groin area, after he sustained damaged from descending into Planet Water.