Funny / Jonathan Creek

• This exchange, whilst Maddy is locked in a jail cell on suspicion of conspiracy:
  Maddy: What if they give me some kind of truth serum?!
  Jonathan: It wouldn't stand a chance.
• Adam's attempt to cash in on the success of Derren Brown, which ends with him being attacked by an angry mob of persons of small stature. (Amazingly, It Makes Sense in Context.)
• The episodes featuring Adam's attempts to play Follow the Leader with David Blaine are also strong candidates.
• When Adam's latest Girl of the Week (an Austrian seamstress) misinterepts his need for a frock coat for a Jack-the-Ripper sketch and ends up making him a giant frog costume, complete with papier-maché head and flippers for his feet. Even better is Jonathan's reaction to it:
  Jonathan: Is this it then, is it? Through the swirling fog of Victorian London a young girl is slashed to ribbons by Toad of Toad Hall!
  • (Sounds like the most hilariously weird fanfiction premise ever, doesn't it?)
  • She also gives him a choice of shirts to wear for his act which are all black. Adam confides in Jonathan that he's after her because he's heard she's from an isolated 'very conservative' valley and therefore must be naive and easy to manipulate. The payoff comes at the end, when we find out just how conservative that valley is—she's a Nazi!
• Maddy and Jonathan, mid-case, stopping to have an extended argument about the lyrics to the chorus of "My Friend the Witch Doctor", as well as who sang it (Maddy claims it was Charlie Drake, somehow getting it mixed up with "My Boomerang Won't Come Back".) It almost qualifies as a Big-Lipped Alligator Moment considering it has absolutely nothing to do with anything they've been discussing in the episode up until that point, and is never mentioned again (though it's mentioned that the argument started offscreen earlier in the episode, and was somehow precipitated by a suspect's interest in voodoo.) It also serves to illustrate the fact that despite their sniping at each other, the two of them are happiest when they're squabbling over nothing.
• Nigel Planer's cameo in "The Reconstituted Corpse" as Maddy's blind date. A stereotypical British gentleman, reminiscent of John Cleese, who briefly speaks of sex in a rather loquacious fashion. He also returns from the toilet in a restaurant with water all down the front of his trousers and loudly declares "It's not urine so it won't stain!"
• Almost any time Adrian Edmondson is on-screen as Carla's pompous, pretentious but strangely loveable husband Brendan.
• Maddy's flat is burgled and the lock on her door is taking a while to fix. In the meanwhile, she leaves a post-it note on the door to deter others: "Burglars, don't bother - I've been done." Jonathan remarks:
  "Interesting security system."
  • And the burglar answered her phone for her when it went off while he was burgling her flat!
  Jonathan: Oh no - he told me he was doing something with your computer.
  Maddy: He was. He was stealing it!
• The time when, due to not paying attention to what the man on the other end of the phone line was saying, Maddy ended up at a nudist meeting.
• In "Black Canary", Rik Mayall cameos as DI Gideon Pryke who saves Jonathan from having his neck broken by a thug in a car park:
  Thug: What's your game?
  Pryke: (whipping his police badge out) This. What's yours, tiddlywinks?
• In "The Curious Tale of Mr. Spearfish", Maddie has Jonathan do her laundry. This includes his ironing her bra.
• The episode "The Three Gamblers" features a scene in which Maddy is nervously eating sweets in a dark, stone cellar and puts the packet on the floor. With her attention focused on Jonathan, she fails to notice anything that finds its way into the packet, leading to this exchange and a well-warranted I Ate WHAT?! moment:

  Maddy: Jonathan, you appear to be taking leave of your senses!
  [stars chewing on what she thinks is a black sweet]
  Jonathan: [without even turning around or missing a beat] Possibly, but I haven't just put a live slug in my mouth!
  Maddy: No, but you could...[realizing] [Spit Take] ACK!!! ARGH!!! EUGH!!!

• All of Ridley's parodic Sherlock Scans with Entertainingly Wrong conclusions in "The Letters of Septimus Noone" - specifically mercilessly mocking Sherlock. The fact that his actor strongly resembles a young David Tennant just adds a surreal twist to it.
• In Angel Hair, Jonathon orders a ventriloquist's dummy for a new trick from a maker he notes is "slightly dotty". When he calls to confirm that the dummy will come with "12 feet" (spares since the trick involves sawing it in half), we cut to the maker, who is working on a 12 foot high dummy. The fact that the show actually made a freakishly large dummy for the gag makes it all the funnier.
• In "The Curse of the Bronze Lamp", Horace Greeley contacts Jonathan about Poppy Mason, a woman who shares his interest in unexplained phenomena and would love to meet him. Jonathan texts him back, asking him if he could arrange to bring Poppy along on Monday if possible. Horace later shows up with a Grey Heron in the back of his van, much to Jonathan's confusion.
  Horace: I can let her out if you want to inspect more closely. But we'll have to box clever in case she suddenly takes flight - they're a devil for that.
  Jonathan: Mr Greeley, what are you talking about? Why in heaven's name would I want to inspect it more closely?
  Horace: Well, as you specifically asked me to bring her along, I naturally assumed-
  Jonathan: Asked you to bring her along?
  Horace: Well, I don't think I imagined it, did I?
  Jonathan: Yes, strange as it may seem, I'm not in the habit of inviting semi-domesticated water-fowl round for morning coffee.
  Horace: What kind of nincompoop do you take me for? (He pulls out his mobile phone) "Hi Mr G.Re Poppy, happy to oblige. Will you arrange? If at all poss, could you bring heron Monday?"
  Jonathan: Well, quite patently I missed the space out! It's a tad of a non-sequitur, wouldn't you say?
  Horace: Well, I'm sorry. I was under the impression you took an interest in these things. If you knew how long it took me this morning to round this one up in the garden. It was only by the grace of God and three large tins of sardines I eventually managed-
  Jonathan: Mr Greeley, I despair. I completely and utterly despair.
  • Later, after Jonathan tells Polly about this:
  Polly: I'm not laughing. Really and honestly, I do empathise. Cos that must have been so disappointing! (Struggling not to laugh) Poor thing. Was expecting to meet a serious ornithologist and what happens?
• "The Omega Man" opens outside a theatre, showing a poster for a stage production of The Odd Couple, apparently starring Steve Martin and Harrison Ford. Jonathan and Maddy walk out, distinctly unimpressed to say the least: "If Steve Harrison and Martin Ford get out alive, it'll be a miracle."