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  • The first "Egg Files" episode sees Alton sneaking into a diner kitchen to teach the audience how to properly fry eggs over-easy. He is soon accosted by the diner's head chef who demands Alton to get out (the first in a series-long set of running gags). The chef's redneck accent and missing teeth are funny enough, but what sends the sketch over the edge is where Alton tries to demonstrate the difference between a raw and hard-boiled egg, the chef grabs the raw egg and crushes it in his hand, sending yolk and albumen all over the both of them. AB's flinch sends everyone behind the camera audibly laughing and the chef's actor (Steve Rooney) corpsing as Alton calmly walks off set.
  • "A Pie in Every Pocket" has Alton explaining the history of Cornish pasties, quoting a bit of folklore claiming the devil wouldn't go to Cornwall for fear he'd get baked into a pastie. The devil appears and denies this, only to get chased off-screen and beaten up by a pair of Cornish housewives.
    • The Stinger of the same episode is an outtake where an object is supposed to fall on a person sitting next to Alton but fails to do so. Alton then goes on to briefly explain the importance of timing in comedy.
  • In "Roll Call" Alton replaces his usual more lively yeast puppets with "more realistic" ones. They consist of stuffed socks that sit there, leading to Alton's frustration.
  • The opening segment on the episode on tea has Brown attending a little girl's tea party. She reports that the teddy bear called him "goofy."
  • In "Dill-icious", Alton goes all Mad Scientist and demonstrates the old "pickle lamp" science experiment. The lamp lights up...then Itchy & Twitchy cut the juice and hand AB a Don't Try This at Home statement.
    Alton: Lights! Power! PICKLE! Ahahahahaha—Hey, that's my experiment!
  • In "Tricks for Treats" Alton makes some peanut brittle, then wonders how many licks it'll take to get to the center. He then does the same thing as Mr. Owl from the Tootsie Pop commercial and takes "three" licks.
  • In "Feeling Punchy", Alton is at a dry wedding at some church hall, where the "punch" consists of ginger ale and sherbet. While he's talking, a little old lady comes in and spikes the punch, and begins handing out cups of it to everyone.
  • The episode, "Give Peas A Chance", which spoofs The Exorcist....complete with the Good Eats theme done in the style of Tubular Bells as incidental music.
  • From the first Oat Cuisine: Alton, in a goofy fantasy sequence with a bumbling assistant, shows us how to make haggis (which contains oats as an ingredient). Both guys are outdoors depicting themselves as bargain-basement Braveheart clones in silly wigs and kilts. Alton speaks with an over-the-top fake Scottish accent. It's all pretty silly. In addition, Alton admitted on the 10th anniversary special that they accidentally filmed that scene on top of a yellowjacket nest.
    • "Oat Cuisine 2", where he focuses on the health benefits of oats, opens with Alton dressed as his "brother" Dr. Xavier Brown trying to sell a health book titled Eat Oats or Die Screaming.
  • He often says things like "don't buy what you can make", so it's funny when prepping his meatloaf recipe in "A Grind is a Terrible Thing to Waste", he confesses (in an ashamed tone) that he bought garlic croutons to put into his meatloaf.
  • In "Live and Let Diet" (discussing weight loss), Alton's lawyers have him on the couch making him read statements that he isn't a doctor or otherwise qualified to be giving people real dieting advice while a doctor (whom Alton is quick to point out isn't a doctor either, but the cameraman) is behind the couch running tests on Alton. The second they hear his Glove Snap behind them, Alton and the lawyers all look at each other in horror and run for it.
  • At one point while advising how to buy a propane tank, he suggests strapping it into a child's car seat to keep it from rolling around the car. In the end, he asks "Where do the kids go? What do you think the trunk's for?" and drives off laughing.
  • In "Fruit 10 From Outer Space," the Dungeon Master recommends a blender to AB for juicing pomegranates. When Alton comments on how he doesn't recognize the blender, the Dungeon Master replies, "It's mine. For goldfish." After a few seconds of silence, Alton claims to hear his mom calling.
  • In the Reloaded version of "Fry Hard", Alton starts to explain that Marshanote  is not his sister, when Marsha and several TV family membersnote  walk in, only to proceed to troll him by claiming he’s just being mean to them, despite the fact that he’s an only child.
  • In the Reloaded episode of "Use Your Noodle", Alton recalls an accident he had with a Vespa scooter during filming. Cue re-enactment with flailing puppets.
  • Episode 1 of Good Eats: The Return kicks off the return of the show with "American Classics 10: Chicken Parm", served up by Alton with a bit of Self-Deprecation and a little subtle Take That! involving a certain other Food Network show related Memetic Mutation while giving the list of breading ingredients he'll be using for the Chicken Parmesan.
    Alton: Representing the dry team, 120 gramsnote —that's a cup—of plain breadcrumbs. You can use homemade, these are store bought. Don't judge me!
  • Two words: The Waffler! Alton in a very silly Batman like costume going around stealing waffles.

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