"Reinforcing booze? You genius!" The spearman roared in approval. "Why the hell didn't I think of that when I was alive?! I love this bastard!" "Yer not so bad yerself blueboy!" Sirius laughed, already getting along far too well with the heroic spirit for Bazett to feel comfortable with.
Archer EMIYA's reaction to being in this universe and realizing that this world's Shirou is pretty similar to him already in terms of looks and powers and that he needs to do something to prevent people from making the connection. Rin suggests he shave his hair since he should have no problems conjuring up something to do the job, The next line after this just makes it so perfect.
And Taiga's reaction when she finds out Saber can ride it.
With this grand finale:
"Fine. I'll ignore it for now. Just please don't let anyone see you on that thing. A bunch of gramp's men would go nuts if they saw someone other than Shirou riding it." Shirou nodded, silently patting himself on the back for putting on the rune sequences that make it easy for normal people nearby to ignore the bike as it ran.
And for an encore, an omake in chapter 54 has Rider be sent to retrieve the bike, and she promptly goes joyriding on it, causing Saber to watch the resultant car chase on the evening news with a twitching eye as Rider performs stunts like a hextuple shaolin backflip on her beloved bike while she evades the police.
Rin, Sakura and the Edelfelt sisters along with their butler showing up at Shirou's home to get help for a business deal at the same time Bazett is crashing there. It can't be summed up with words.
Taiga showing up during negotiations and mistaking it for Shirou buying a harem from a Yakuza, deciding Shirou needs to be punished and attacking with the cursed Tora Shinai. (Though, technically, it isn't Tora Shinai but a near-permanent copy made by Shirou. The real one was dismantled by Kirei on Rin's request.)
Merem Solomon (the 20th Dead Apostle Ancestor) telling Lancer (who is part-god) how much he would like to partake in such high-quality blood as his.
Lancer:[stepping back nervously] Wait, are you saying that because I'm part god my blood acts like an aphrodisiac to you? Merem: No. More like an extremely tasty and rare meal that is literally impossible to obtain in this day and age that has nothing that can possibly match it. It is rather addicting to those who are fortunate enough to have ever tasted such an unrivaled blessing on the organ that we call tongues. Not to mention the rush we get from drinking blood of such quality is indescribable to those who do not share our physiology. Blood of your particular quality is unheard of in this day and age. I have no doubt that Van-Fem would be willing to pay a small fortune for just a single well preserved bottle of yours. Lancer: Well it's good to know that Apostles have good taste in people, but I'm afraid that my neck is not… [notices that Bazett is staring at him] [Beat] Lancer: Oi, Master? What exactly are you thinking? Bazett:* who is in financial need and knows that Van-Fem (the 14th Dead Apostle Ancestor) is an honest businessman A small fortune... Lancer: Ok. Hold up. Both of you. Can we get back on track please? For example, that half-dead kid who nearly got killed by one of the strongest legends out there on magical steroids is still out there.
Lancer basically describing most generic Stock Shōnen Hero and being derisive of them.
"Is he one of those types that for some stupid reason gets stronger every time you wail on him, because I really hate those masochists. All they have to do is live and they get a power boost."
Shirou, Archer, Kirei, and Assassin noting at numerous points in the story their opinion of Witch!Caster's decision-making and tactical skills, mostly about how she isn't good at it. Each time they do it they more or less explicitly think to themselves all the mistakes she's making.
Chapter 23:
When Saber brings up Shirou's injuries during breakfast with Sakura and Rider, Rider assumes that Shirou got into a fight with Caster since he was still alive after fighting a Servant one-on-one. Then Shirou reveals that he fought Berserker. Rider is understandably startled, and raises Shirou several notches on the threat meter.
Rider messes with Shirou by pointing out that men tend to find her body appealing and asking his opinion. With him being painfully aware that saying the wrong thing and provoking the three girls would result in him being hurt very bad, he gives a half-hearted excuse and flees the room.
Archer has an Open Mouth, Insert Foot moment when he accidentally reveals that he's seen Rin naked when he was alive. He has a moment of Oh, Crap! at Rin's expression before she demonstrates why Shirou was so worried in the above scene by breaking out the gem magecraft.
Rin and Luvia end up tag-teaming to make fun of Shirou and Sakura, declaring that there was no way that the knightly Emiya and the soft-spoken Matou would do anything untoward with each other while still managing to keep it a secret... unaware that Shirou has taken Shinji's place in Zouken's Mana Transfers, meaning that they've been sleeping together for years without anyone being the wiser.
In chapter 26, the Edelfelt sisters attacked the Matou manor, burning it down in the process. In chapter 27, Shirou and Sakura stay home (at Shirou's), so Taiga has a classmate bring them the homework. Her choice? LUVIAGELITA EDELFELT. Princess!Caster's reaction is priceless.
Unnoticed by all, the Princess displayed a rare moment of frustration and put her face in her hands in despair. Hopefully Saber and Rider would not hold a grudge for last night's events and… Oh who was she kidding? She was doomed.
Actually not so funny when it is finally revealed that Taiga knows a lot more than she let on, and did this on purpose to nudge the conflict in the right direction.
Chapter 27's omake shows Kirei saving an American tourist during the clean-up of Louvre's familiars and why Kirei and the Church hate Hollywood.
The American Tourist commenting on Kirei's technique: "Holy fuck it's Wolverine!"
Bonus Points for being one long Shout-Out to the Don't Interrupt Kotomine Kirei While He's Jogging Meme. Really. Read the Omake. Then read the meme immediately afterwards. Then read the Omake again, immediately after reading the meme. Every single picture is referenced.
After that, Taiga asks if Sakura's lack of sleep is owed to her having sex with Shirou all night long.
Shirou and Sakura looked at one another skeptically. Technically they HAD done what Taiga was jokingly insinuating, along with other surreal and potentially illegal activities, but they weren't going to tell her that… "No, Sensei." Sakura smiled sincerely. "We were just talking about the secret war and conspiracies that we are currently involved in that may or may not involve our violent deaths in the near future." ... Or maybe they were. [...] Refuge in Audacity. The nobles of the Association do not use this tactic when dealing with secrets, probably because they gave people the impression that they sucked at humor and imaginative sarcasm to pull it off believably. Other than them though, it was still very commonly used among everyone else involved in their world.''
How did Shirou react to Sakura getting away with that?
"Scary…" Shirou shivered at the girl's ability to get around sensitive situation. The more he saw it, the easier it was for him to believe that she was Rin's sister.
Luvia and Princess!Caster's reactions when Shirou is forced to explain that Gilgamesh wants Saber as his queen.
The scene between Bazett, Lancer and Merem. With Bazett continuously threatening Lancer to use a Command Seal to have him sodomize himself.
From chapter 32:
Taiga meeting Illya out in the night. This is just the start.
Illya: If it's so dangerous then why are you out, sensei? Taiga:[flinching because she was just walking around out of boredom] Urk! Ah well... you know. Just walking around to see if I can help out some friends with... stuff... Illya: Stuff? Taiga: Grownup stuff. Things kids like you shouldn't bother yourselves with. Illya:Really? You mean like the time I once went to see mommy and daddy in their room and they were naked and... Taiga: Waa! Different stuff! Different stuff!
Following this exchange, Illya dupes Taiga into bringing her to Shirou's home for a snack (with Taiga reasoning the lost little foreign girl would tickle his fancy of being a superhero), and Taiga warns Illya to not let herself caught in the harem of stereotypes Shirou is building for himself note According to Taiga, the harem already includes the following stereotypes: a School Idol (Rin), two Foreign Beauties (Luvia and Saber), and an Overly Attached Underclassman (Sakura). Also, Shirou may be planning to include either Bazett or Taiga herself as the Older Sister type, and themaleIssei Ryoudo may be in it as the Class Representative. Illya, of course, would be the Little Sister. The latter claim causes Illya to be terrified of Taiga.
Chapter 33:
Taiga's sequence is beyond description.
Sakura's reaction to Rider telling her of Zouken's death:
Sakura: Rider, as much as you seem to be enjoying this, and I can indeed tell you are, can you please start from the beginning and not be so mysterious? While being told that Grandfather is dead is great news, I'm afraid I'm too tired and confused to be any more shocked than I currently am. Rider: Do you wish for me to do so before or after you get some coffee? Sakura: Hopefully, after. Thank you.
Chapter 37: As Lorelei Barthomeloi walks through through the Sealing Designates' cell area, the narration hints that one of them is there for making Pokémon.
Chapter 38 has Rin using her second Command Seal to force Archer to speak full, accurate, and elaborated truths, rather than the technical truths, half-truths, and outright lies that he'd been telling her. Though most of what he tells her is as horrifying as one would expect, given who he is, he does take a small measure of revenge by showing them how he could identify Gae Bolg accurately: taking off his armor and showing them the scar he received from it, stretched across his very muscular chest. Rin, Luvia and Princess-Caster are all stunned speechless by the sight.
Sella offers to do the dishes after a meal prepared by Shirou, and gets hit with a speech in which Shirou patiently explains that the list of people he allows into his kitchen is shorter than the list of people he allows in his workshop, and she has not proven herself worthy of setting foot in there, even though she has no intention of trying to cook anything. What makes it so funny is the fact that Shirou is completely serious.
This gets a Call-Back in Chapter 52, when Merem Solomon tries to raid the kitchen without permission and Shirou stops him. That's right, Shirou stood up to a Dead Apostle Ancestor over who is and is not permitted in his kitchen. This is not worth more than a single sentence and yet it's both hysterically funny and interesting in the implications.
Practically every time Taiga stops by Shirou's house, sees a female she didn't expect inside, and starts overreacting.
The fabulous belt, with its sword shaped gems which this troper visualized as Goku Uniforms star marks from Kill la Kill, and everyone's comments about it:
"But you look ridiculous!" Illya couldn't tear her eyes from the gems. There was a time and place for showing off one's affluence and now was certainly not it. "You're supposed to be a badass mercenary, not some hip hop poser from States showing off your bling!" "My eyes are up here." For the love of all that was decent he prayed that Sakura and Saber found the sleeve for his belt soon. The last thing he needed was for Gilgamesh to be fixated on his crotch region when they started to fight.
How Archer gets whipped by Luvia, Princess!Caster and Rin:
"I'll prepare the tea," Archer excused himself, completely unaffected by the day's events unlike the others. "DAMN STRAIGHT YOU WILL!" All three women shouted at him at the same time just as he disappeared around the corner.
Most of the moments can be summed up in one word : "Waffles".
During his preparations of the Einzbern manor for the War, Shirou made alterations to their plans for the kitchen. Including a waffle iron for Illya, enough first-rate kitchen gear to allow Shirou to continue cooking up to his usual standards while there if he ends up staying there, and a walk-in industrial freezer large enough to hold Berserker.
Chapter 42: So Rin prepares this huge magic array for an awesome spell that should, if not end the fight right there, at least give her and Luvia an edge. In the meantime, Luvia frantically tries to keep Bazett at bay, and herself outside of the array, especially with Rin being ominous and simply stating "You'll live". And then, it turns out to be something outright ripped fromHigh School D×D, a stripping spell not unlike "Dress Break", which came from a book penned by Zelretch three hundred years ago.
Chapter 44 Omakes:
Why Illya didn't spend much time with Shirou when arriving (because the bombs went off and totaled Einzbern Castle, or what was left of it)
Why Saber didn't feel like talking much after leaving the Castle (because she left her precious bike in the wrecked castle's garage)
Chapter 46: Shirou vows to subject Witch!Caster and maybe Assassin to a very, very painful and merciless death. They messed with his kitchen, and rigged it with traps. Saber readily agrees.
But by far the worst of the traps was… Shirou: They will die. Slowly. Painfully. I will show no mercy. Rin: They just had to rig the kitchen. As if they didn't give him enough reasons to be pissed. Rin sighed, ignoring the aura of pure murder hovering around Shirou as he held the brick of C4 in his hand, diffused thanks to a few cut wires. Luvia: Well given who Assassin is, it does make some sense. Luvia laughed nervously, slowly edging away from the teen. Saber: Molesting a chef's kitchen. Such sacrilege was not tolerated even in my time. Saber seemed to be on the same wavelength as her Master, though that may be simply because if Shirou lost his kitchen he wouldn't be able to cook anywhere as adequately for her for a while.
Chapter 47 has this exchange between Witch!Caster and Archer:
Luvia: Why have you graced us with your attention, Caster? Surely you have faith in Assassin. Caster: I have faith he will do all that he can to countermand my orders. It appears we all have learned that Servants who bear the name Emiya are rather arduous to control. Archer: We also apparently have a tendency to get frequently summoned by irrational women.
Chapter 48 has several :
When Lancer offers a drink to Shirou once the battle is over, he replies he is underage.
The brick comes back quickly as Merem gives Shirou a quick boost for effort... a vial of Lancer's blood. Let me rephrase : a vial of an Irishman who was so inebriated his blood is naturally saturated in alcohol. Shirou nearly throws up upon downing it.
Archer's crass Double Entendre with how Witch!Caster likes to take red sticks from behind. Shirou is not amused.
Archer: From what I've been told, you have a habit of taking it from behind, and the opportunity presented itself. I couldn't help myself. Archer shrugged. Archer: This makes it the third time, right? Shirou: Really? Shirou deadpanned, finally breaking his silence and taking a few steps away from the Servant.
Chapter 49 has Shirou joke that women's legs will now be a turnoff for him after the beating Rider gave him. Rider's response is to become indigent and sulky for several minutes and mentally complain that swords will be herturnoff. Then she does a mental double-take at her own thought process.
Rin of course, notices this immediately and complains about Shirou adding "another one". Merem laughs his ass off at the sight, and Shirou remains oblivious.
Chapter 50:
Saber states that even with how much Shirou loves Kiritsugu, he WILL end him if he dares set foot in his kitchen again, topping it with the implication that only at such times would what normal people refer to "survival instincts" kick in for Shirou.
Saber and Shirou's mutual teasing : everyone decided to crash at Shirou's place, Shirou blanches, Saber states that if he has anything to say about this he should take it with them, to which Shirou calls her out on not bailing him out of a dangerous situation, and to which Saber answers she gave up since she understood she would never be able to stop Shirou. All in the best of moods, of course.
Archer going over the situation in his head, mulling how This Is Gonna Suck being stuck as Rin's Servant, and having to deal with his younger counterpart in this timeline, who somehow hates him MORE than Archer hated canon Shirou, along with Illya and Kiritsugu. Yet, he still states in his thoughts that he really wants to see how Shirou will cope up with being involved in the ensuing chaos, probably because as he said to Princess!Caster, he only has the little things left.
A very good example of Brick Joke set up as early as Chapter 2 when Kiritsugu wonders what Old Man Acht did with the computer he had set in their castle.
A small smirk appeared on the man's face. He wondered if they still had that computer he had set up in the middle of their cathedral still. He remembered how irritated he had made the elder of the family, bugging him about how it would increase his chances of victory in the 4th war if he had it until he had finally given in… Odds were that it was utterly destroyed upon word that he had betrayed them. Oh well… these newer models were much better than the one there anyways.
Hilariously, it is still active by Chapter 44, and Old Man Acht actually had to modernize and get computers for everyone in the younger generation.
Despite what many would have guessed ten years ago, he hadn't destroyed the infernal device that Kiritsugu Emiya had installed into castle during his stay. While he certainly had a distaste for modern technology even he could not deny that it had its uses. From what he understood, the computer was rather old and antiquated by modern standards, but it didn't change the fact that the item was incredibly useful for documenting reports and research. Obviously, things such as handwritten notes, circles, runes, and drawings were better on scrap paper, but errant reports and notes were just words and easily stored on the device.
Chapter 51:
It's hilarious to realize how, for as paranoid as Shirou is, he never once checked Taiga for recording devices.
Illya manages to use a mix of guilting and threatening to feed Berserker all of the leftovers to make Kiritsugu have dinner with everyone.
Saber commiserates with Shirou over being fought over by terrifyingly dangerous women, something that the King of Knights has experience in thanks to her life as the king of Britain and therefore the most eligible husband, bachelor or not.
The Omake at the end of the chapter detailing some more hijinks Shirou gets into in Chaldea. Not only does he have a tendency to incinerateArcher whenever he is summoned, but for once even the Counter Guardian determines that Shirou's anger is justified when he is forcibly summoned to Chaldea and meets Chloevon Eiznbern.
Seeing Shirou bullshit his way out of explaining how he could fight Gilgamesh.
Both for the reaction of the audience and the sheer Refuge in Audacity along with a healthy blend of "I was very lucky and benefited of unique circumstances", and "Are you seriously expecting me to be able to pull such outlandish feats? Let's get real for a second. Move Along, Nothing to See Here."
Kiritsugu mentally facepalming HARD upon hearing this, as he now wonders why he didn't think of what Shirou did with Time Accel on Saber to destroy his opponents.
Shirou deliberately bringing up Zelretch, which is considered akin to speaking of the devil in the Clock Tower. The best part? The man actually answering and saying hi.
Also major troll points for using Exact Words and saying EMIYA is always at the center of the Grail Wars.
Chapter 53:
The Archibalds being borderline Too Dumb to Live, providing illegally acquired evidence stolen from the Vice Director (murdering members of her staff to boot!), without bothering to notify the prosecution of where it came from. By the time Shirou certified the documented information was authentic, he flipped the problem on its head and turned it into a major Oh, Crap! moment for the prosecution... And all his clients get a Mass "Oh, Crap!", since Lorelei now has probable cause to investigate in atrocious detail ANYONE that the prosecution had ties to. What sells it is Lorelei's reaction of "pleasant surprise", akin to receiving an early Christmas present she didn't know she was getting.
Kiritsugu showing off the Thompson Contender at Lorelei's request, and Sirius's reaction to the fact a weapon he made actually made it to the Throne and is considered a Noble Phantasm. To say he was gobsmacked would be politely understating it.
The celebration party that followed ends up being the stuff of legendary Noodle Incidents, and gets Sirius barred from hosting parties and selling his McGinty's Moonshine.
The whole exchange with Lorelei Comically Missing the Point when telling Sirius to stop embarrassing himself, is also worth mentioning.
"I… how?" For once, the old man was at a loss of words and no amount of swearing and crass language would be able to cover for it. "I have been told that keeping one's mouth shut is the best method," she coolly answered, before leaning in, manifesting a small air based mystery that would prevent her lips from being read and her voice from being heard by anyone she did not approve of. "I believe that congratulations are in order, McGinty. It is a notable accomplishment to have verification that one's project has made it to the Throne of Heroes." The Mystic Code Crafter's eyes blinked as the woman left him. Once. Twice. His lips twitched. His breath hitched. And then… "A. Aha. Ahahaha. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The drunk old giant leaned back and laughed so hard that the legs in the back of his chair gave way and he landed flat on his back. Even then, it did absolutely nothing to stop or even interrupt what had to be the loudest and hardest bellowing of laughter that wasn't magically or insanity induced in the Association in recorded history.
Almost all the females ganging up on Shirou to try and make sure he doesn't do anything headache inducing while everyone else is busy.
Saber decides that pumelling her master in the name of training is a perfect punishment for keeping the secret about Dead Apostle Ancestors in Fuyuki (both himself and Fina) from everyone.
Chapter 55:
Waver being completely despondent at the beginning of the second part of the trial. Everyone assumes a Fate Worse than Death in waiting... Well, they're not wrong. He's going to be hitched to Reines El-Melloi Archisorte.
Even funnier, Yvette is one of those who hears this, and let's out a hilarious Big "NO!" in response.
Zelretch showing up at the end, and the whole omake with him basically vehemently going Not Me This Time.
Chapter 57 (Omake Chapter):
Saber stops all hostilities from Primate Murder by suggesting they first discuss something else, and then repeating "Kill Merlin" several times while pantomiming hand movements like she's making an epic speech. It worksspectacularly well, and Saber rides off on Primate Murder as a mount to go look for Merlin so they can kill him.
Altrouge, seeing Saber run off with her dog, begs Shirou to consider dogsitting for her sometime. When Shirou vehemently says "NO" she resorts to clutching his leg in desperation while complaining about the logistics of taking care of a dog bigger than a horse.
Altrouge: "Take him! Take my murder puppy! Do you know what it's like to constantly have to walk something twenty times your size?! He doesn't let anyone get close to him! I have to clean up after him every day!"
Chapter 58:
Shirou trying to structurally grasp Arcueid's hair and mistakenly triggering his Pure Eyes and nearly giving himself brain damage. Then Fina, having a background in magecraft, tries it too, and nearly gives himself an aneurysm. Merem understandably enough facepalms.
Archer feels the need to explain why inaction is the best course of action, and mentions that over the eons he HAS seen Beast IV and Grand Servants. And been on the receiving end of Grand Assassin/First Hassan's sword. Once. To drive the point home, the narration states that he remembers THAT death more vividly than the actual end of his mortal life.
Chapter 59's Omake: Da Vinci conducts an experiment to check how much influence the human container's consciousness will have on Pseudo-Servants: she does so by grabbing several Sakuraface Servants and putting them in the same room as Shirou. Shirou explains how he stabbed Zouken in the back, murdered him, and destroyed his soul while he screamed in agony and betrayal. There is a pause, and Hilarity Ensues as they all start fighting over him.
Chapter 60:
Irisviel's conversation with Caster and Luvia is derailed when the former asks if her son is cute.
Caster:What. Irisviel: You heard me. If I'm going to have a child that I was completely unaware of, he should at least be cute. Or handsome.
When Luvia starts blushing, Irisviel concludes that her son is indeed cute before asking Luvia several personal questions about Shirou.
There is something darkly funny in Waver managing to bullshit his way out of a direct question from Lorelei asking if Shirou was the Ash of Miracles.
And the end of their discussion:
"Pardon my language, but how is it that Shirou is your Dog but I'm treated as your bitch after everything has transpired?" "Don't be ridiculous Lord El Melloi. As the Vice-Director of the Clocktower, it is common knowledge that nearly everyone in my domain falls under that crude title."
Irisviel learning about Shirou counts as one. Kiritsugu flat out mentions that he has a Reality Marble, works for Barthomeloi Lorelei, and is a Dead Apostle. Iri thinks that he's trying to make a joke, until she realizes that he's serious and starts demanding that he explain himself and how she suddenly has a son. Kiritsugu responds by quickly vacating the area without saying another word, and Iri descends to shouting indignities after her husband and asking Illya to make her father stay and answer her questions.
Despite the heaviness her appearance has, it's nice to know that some of Irisviel's eccentric nature survived. Especially when it concerns her wanting to know more about Shirou, her adopted son. She often derails her conversation with Luvia to ask questions about him and pester Luvia about her feelings for him.
Chapter 61:
Irisviel nonverbally threatens the other women with her when she asks them to never use Merem's rats to communicate with her.
When Merem, Irisviel, and the rest who're with them enter the Emiya household, they find that Shirou is sitting in a seiza in front of a stern looking Rin and Sakura.
While Shirou is speaking with Lorelei, Irisviel interrupts and makes a crack at the latter for being single.
(about how much she trusts Kiritsugu to kill her) "It comes with being married and being in love with someone you truly trust with all you're heart. From the way you speak, I take it you are still single?"
It was as if the world's most violent, vicious, scarring, and most destructive car crash had taken place in the living room, and it was on mute. Slowly. Ever so slowly, everyone turned to Irisviel. Their faces morphing into a mix of absolute horror and disbelief. "… Huh?" Shirou literally squeaked. He had faced Servants and Noble Phantasms. Been mentally tortured by Zouken. And fought Apostles. But he would not lie if he said that he had never been more terrified than he was at that very moment.
After a pause, Lorelei asks that Irisviel repeat what she said as if she couldn't believe what she just heard.
Lorelei: … Care to repeat that, Servant? I didn't quite hear you the first time. Irisviel: I was just curious. You are my son's supervisor, and you sound quite young and capable. Even as sheltered as I was when I was alive, the Barthomelloi name and reputation held substantial weight. No doubt you are a talent worthy of your family name. Yet, to not be familiar with the idea of love and the intimate implication it carries… from my perspective, that's an existence closer to that of a homunculus than a human.
This exchange causes the other occupants of the room to really start panicking.
Sakura: Did, she actually just say that? Illya: Mama?! What on earth are you doing?! Rin: Someone shut her up before she gets us all killed! Luvia: Shirou! Snap out of it and get her away from the phone! Shirou: (with a dazed look in his eyes) Ah… so this is how I die in the end. Who knew?
Unlike the others, Merem is enjoying this and thinking of spreading it to the other Ancestors.
Illya resorts to summoning Berserker and having him grab her mother to get her to stop insulting Lorelei.
Archer has some fun when telling his father some of the things that happen in the Extra timeline.
Waver finds that the possibility of the Vice Director being fond of him is too much for him, even compared to everything that has already happened, and decides that he needs to get some sleep.
Waver's eyebrow twitched. The Holy Grail War he managed to handle. Being on trial and having the Clocktower ready to hang him, fine. Getting engaged to Reines left him in a perpetual nightmare, but a tolerable one. Lording over the El Melloi family in its entirety, possible, if not maddening. Being a potential target of affection by a Barthomelloi? Nope. That settles it. He was clearly overworked and needed to get some rest asap before he started to hallucinate and see some even more twisted shit that even a Caster couldn't come up with.
When Sirius finds out that Shirou is indeed the 10th Dead Apostle Ancestor, and that Shirou himself only found that out near the end of the Holy Grail War, he has a few choice words on what he's going to do to Solomon the next time they meet face to face.
"Four limbs be damned. If I ever see Solomon again, I'm wringing that Catholic toy's neck till he shits sermons to Type Moon so hard the Pope can smell it an add it to his speeches."
While Waver's realizing that he's in a meeting with Altorouge Brunestud, he begins panicking and thinking that surely his luck isn't that bad.
. Really. Read the Omake. Then read the meme immediately afterwards. Then read the Omake again, immediately after reading the meme. Every single picture is referenced.