Funny / First Encounter Assault Recon

Dark humor abounds in the FEAR series.

First Encounter Assault Recon

• At the very beginning of the game, while you're getting briefed on the situation and Betters sums up the situation, Jankowski is very annoyed:
  Jankowski: You've gotta be fucking kidding me. This is why nobody takes us seriously. Military clones?
• Betters has plenty of commentary to add over the course of the mission, like when dealing with Alice Wade:
  Betters: Those soldiers are after you. If they capture you again, they're going to interrogate you - and believe me, their methods are very unpleasant.
  Alice Wade: I'll take my chances.
  Betters: Stubborn little bitch, isn't she?
  • Later, when Jin and the Point Man meet back up:
    Jin: Thank God you're alright!
    Betters: You two can make out later, now get on the chopper!
• Alice freaking out if the Point Man decides to leave the elevator to take the fight to the Replica.
  Alice: You don't have to kill everybody!
  • Really, the entire escort sequence. Between the incongruously cheery (and incredibly irritating) music in the elevator to Alice's increasingly horrified reactions to the Point Man getting his Blood Knight on, it's one of the most hilarious moments in the game.
• When it comes to unscripted moments, smacking an enemy while in Slow-Mo will produce a hilarious bobblehead effect. You can almost imagine a Looney Tunes-esque boing noise whenever their heads start bouncing back and forth. Except for a very small amount of static ones, almost every corpse in the game can be thrown about by melee. Since they're almost always on the ground, the easiest method to reach them is the slide-kick... and using that will fling then twenty feet away.
• Speaking of smacking people around, the three Replica soldiers after you pop Fettel's head. Walk up, bitchslap, repeat.
• In Interval 9, there is an Easter Egg in a semi-hidden area: a radio playing Negai (Wish), the theme of Shogo: Mobile Armor Division^note another game made by Monolith Productions, along with a whiteboard that specifically requests no art to be drawn on it... on which is a very detailed and carefully-labeled drawing of a cowboy.
• One of the signs found throughout the warehouse and Armacham Lab:
  Remember it's:
  Quantity
  Quality
  Safety
  IN THAT ORDER
  • There's also a "Help Keep This Room Clean" sign in a room covered in at least two humans worth of blood coming from the vent above.
• The second time you meet Norton Mapes he's cowering behind a couch while holding a cactus over his head.
  • The final time we see him before the vault is the sight of him trying to cram his fat body into an air vent to escape you.

FEAR 2: Project Origin

• In Project Origin, Jankowski's reactions if you screw around in the plaza.
  Griffin: What kept you?
  Jankowski: Bucket had to take a bath in the fountain.
• Everything about Snake Fist.
  Stokes: Who the hell are you?
  Snake Fist: You can call me...Snake Fist.
  Stokes: (incredulous) ...are you fucking kidding me?!
• Later on:
  Snake Fist: You could even say [Alma] covets you. She's a...coveter. You're like free pizza at an anime convention. She can smell you. And she wants to consume you.
• Still later, you get to see Snake Fist's little informative video - which he apparently filmed on the toilet using hand-drawn cards. His cartoony naked Alma with big round black button eyes, a frowny face, wiggly hair and a black censor bar across her breasts is particularly silly.
• Keegan and Jankowski get sadly little banter, but what is there is hilarious.
  Jankowski: A lot of blood. Looks like he got hit in the aorta.
  Keegan: The aorta? You think it was the carotid or the subclavian artery?
  Jankowski: Dude, making fun of a man for his knowledge is a sign of insecurity.
  • A few moments later, after the first encounter with an Armacham goon:
    Jankowski: Keegan, you okay?
    Keegan: I think they hit my aorta!
    Jankowski: Dude, give it a rest.
• Hiding behind the cardboard donkey in Wade Elementary's auditorium causes the enemy soldiers to utter this hilarious line.
  Armacham Troops: The ass! He's behind the ass! Shoot the ass!
• Manny's commentary during the Hold the Line segment at the end:
  Mmmm! Those bullets taste like chicken, don't they?
• In the hospital, a group of Armacham goons have stopped Becket's elevator. They cut the elevator line, and the mercenaries start joking about how killing him was too easy. Cue Becket, who slipped out of the elevator through a nearby vent, coming through the door right behind them...
• Some of the intel items are funny, usually in an unintentional sort of way.
  INSTRUCTIONS FOR USE OF SUPPLEMENTS:
  
  1. Do not add supplements to foods until cooled to avoid premature breakdown of active ingredients.
  2. Supplements are best added to foods with a strong taste.
  3. If student begins to hyperventilate or projectile vomit after ingesting supplements, decrease dosage.
• A lot of the signs, in particular in the hospital, are littered with jokes to the point its very clear the developers had fun making them.
• Though most of the art descriptions in Genevieve Aristide's personal gallery are serious commentary on the works, one mentions the artist started eating turpentine around the time he painted this particular work so they have no idea what he was doing.
• Another sign in the Auburn Memorial Hospital mentions how "shock therapy" is a new and effective means of medical treatment.

FEAR 3

• FEAR 3 is a little less humorous, but Fettel, of all people, gets a painfully hilarious pun in at the end of Interval Six, when the Point Man gets dropped off a bridge into the river.
  If this is your plan, I'd say things are going...swimmingly! (Evil Laugh)
• The Phase Commander threatening his own men if they retreat is one of the most darkly humorous moments in the entire series.
  Hold position or suffer dismemberment.
• You can pick up nail guns in all of the games, and they can be used to provide hilarious results by pinning your enemies head down on the ceiling, or nailing their limbs to a painting on the wall. Here's an example.◊
  • The linked picture gives a perfect example of the primary source of comedy in these games: the Ragdoll Physics are just amazing, from enemies flinging themselves over guardrails to getting limbs stuck in walls.