Funny / Fire Emblem: The Blazing Blade

• "Help Eliwood? Sounds like a convenient excuse for more violence."
  • Just after this, if you're on Eliwood's route, Hector tells Matthew to go hide somewhere with Serra. Matthew proceeds to complain about getting stuck with her.
• Upon Florina's doubts of becoming a pegasus knight, Sain steps in to convince her that she should continue, since Lyn's group with the inclusion of Wil is basically a freelance mercenary group that she needs to train with. Cue Wil being confused about what Sain said.
  Wil: Wait, did you just include me?
• Admittedly, even the tactician gets a few good ones to certain characters.
  Serra: What I'm getting at is... I'm thinking of healing [Erk] for free. I know, I'm generous to a fault... Hm? Why are you giving me that look?
• Chapter 6 of Lyn's story has an interesting one. Rath berates you if you don't move him to the trigger after Matthew unlocks the door.
  Rath: Do you see a trigger there? I didn't think so.
• Also in Chapter 6, Serra and Matthew have a Talk option where, although she seems to miss him, he comments on getting stuck in the same party as her.
  • Then, in Chapter 7, if you send Serra to the house where Hector is, Hector outright hides from her, leading Serra to assume the house is empty.
• Deciding whether to take Nils and Ninian into Lyndis's Legion:
  Lyn: What do you think, Kent?
  Kent: I think leaving them here will make you more worried than taking them with us.
  Lyn: Sain? [Beat] Oh. Never mind. I know what your answer is.
• When the resident Large Ham Wallace urges you to use his crest.
  Wallace: A GIANT WALKS AMONG YOU! MY DEFENSE IS IMPENETRABLE!! COME, BREAK YOUR WEAPONS AGAINST ME!!!
  • Many players proceed to do just that and unequip all his weapons to use him as a brick wall, allowing other units to do unlimited Level Grinding.
• Among the credits for Lyn's story, Sain, Florina, Serra, and Wallace are probably the most notable for potential humor.
• Speaking of Wallace, his tendency of getting lost can become even funnier in hindsight no matter which version of Four Fanged Offense you get. If you get Lloyd's map (in which Wallace returns), Wallace's ending will talk about how he got so lost he somehow ended up in Ilia. In Linus's map, Wallace doesn't even show up and is never referenced again, so the last thing he does in the game is get lost either way.
• Hector's comments about Matthew.
  Man, why do I get stuck with all the lame henchmen?
  • Also, his comments about Matthew and Serra in Chapter 12, along with them each insisting he was talking about the other one.
• Hector and Eliwood's C Support, displaying Everyone Hates Mathematics.
  Eliwood: Well, I'm in the right. You're wrong.
  Hector: And what makes you say that?
  Eliwood: Whose snoring was it that shook the rafters in numbers class?
  Hector: Ah, good point.
  • Hector doesn't even get a break in the B support. He has a dream about his future daughter falling in love with Eliwood's future son, and declaring that there is absolutely no way he's allowing that to happen. Sorry buddy, it's happening.
• Hector teasing Eliwood about his potential crush on Lyn in the first sidequest.
  • Then later, blundering around when confronting Merlinus.
    Eliwood: Hector, your manners are terrible.
• Erk and Serra's reunion. Erk isn't so happy about it, while Serra flips what he says around.
  Erk: Oh, Serra... you're the last person I wanted to see.
  Serra: Oh, that's so sweet! You wanted to see me again!
  Erk: ...
• In Chapter 15, you have the option of bringing certain characters to talk to Lyn on the battlefield. Some highlights include Matthew blowing his cover, again, and Hector running off to fight and prompting Lyn to call him back.
• Serra and Lucius' supports.
  • C Support: Serra gets bitchy at Lucius because she thinks he's a girl. Lucius confesses to Serra that he's a monk, therefore a guy. Priceless.
  • B Support: she has a full-blown crush on him, and Lucius is oblivious to it.
• Guy and Matthew's C Support. It consists of Matthew dragging out the favor as long as he can. Guy isn't amused.
  • In a later support, Matthew sneaks into Guy's tent to ambush him in his sleep after Guy challenges him to a duel.
  • In the A Support Guy goes after Matthew in the same fashion to earn his payback. It does not end well for poor Guy. Not only Matthew realizes as he gives Guy a pretty bad bump on his head. The way Matthew starts the conversation is what sells it.
• Chapter 17: after pulling up the dory, we find that it's Ninian in the ship. Dart, not knowing how to help her out, specifically, "where to grab her", asks for Lyn's help. In the most awkward way possible. Hector doesn't miss the chance for a comment.
• Fargus calling Dart an idiot before he joins. Then, Dart later calls Fargus's crew a "suicide squad," possibly in part to get back at him.
• Hector and Lyn's argument in the Chapter 18 sidequest. The argument? Figuring out who's making more noise; Hector's armor or Lyn's yelling.
• Hector, the red oni to many characters in the team, being nice at any point in time.
  • An example? Giving Nils a piggy back ride! It's also heartwarming too!◊
  • The other characters frequently commenting on anything nice Hector says/does. It's mostly Lyn/Eliwood/Nils doing the lampshading, but (apparently) even Mark gets in on it once or twice.
• Chapter 20, we have Hector worrying about what Lord Uther will say to him when he finds out he's traveling with Eliwood and Lyn. Cue some rather funny Mood Whiplash when Eliwood (who had earlier been mourning over his father) suddenly starts teasing Hector about it.
• Chapter 21 has Lyn commenting on how unconventional the Ostian family is when Lord Uther tries to make his way to the castle. Hector, being Lord Uther's brother, is displeased.
• Eliwood's confusion when trying to talk to Hawkeye and Lord Pent.
• If Hector goes to talk to recruit in the chapter Living Legend this will lead to a rather humorous dialogue:
  Hector: Ahhhh... Shade... Wait. Shade?!
  [turns around to see Hawekeye right behind him]
  Hector: AGH!
• Chapter 22, if Hawkeye makes a trip to the house, he'll have a special conversation with Fae, gleefully coming in from the last game. She'll go on to criticize Hawkeye for always responding with his trademark catchphrase. What happens next?
  Hawkeye: Is that- ...sorry.
• After reaching Dread Isle, the fortune teller starts getting cranky for dragging her to scary places starting at Chapter 17. At one point, she upright quits to let Nils take over her job.
• Priscilla and Heath's supports.
  • C Support, Heath introduces himself and his wyvern Hyperion, who seems to be feeling unwell. Consulting Priscilla, she admits to overhearing Merlinus complain about something raiding their supplies...
    Heath: ...I don't suppose we could keep this between us?
• There's something funny about after bringing Merlinus in enough maps (in the seventh game), you soon will find enemies struggling to hit a tent (or a wagon), in vain.
• Wil entitling himself as "Normal Archer #3" when Rath calls him strange. Rath, who is usually The Stoic, seems to get confused by this and rides away. Wil calls him out on this later, Rath actually being the one to look back on the awkward situation.
  Rath: Before? ... ... Number three... ...
  Wil: See!! You're doing it again!! I can't believe it!! You never laugh, but the whole "three" thing just slays you every time! Why!! Why!!
• Canas and Vaida's supports. The latter is annoyed by the fact Canas can't stop reading (including a book with hilariously wrong Wyvern descriptions) and orders her wyvern to eat the book.
  Canas: No, please don't... Ohh... Ohh... Why does he have to devour it as if it were so...appetizing?
• Canas' recruitment is worth a couple laughs. He describes the army as "playing tag with these pirates", and he invites himself along because the army is going to Valor and he's had no luck trying himself. He even caps it off by admitting it sounds selfish. Also, while he's explaining that he can help in combat, he says offhandedly that 'dark magic' is "a rather biased term, if I must be blunt" before getting back on track.
• Many characters have very funny things to say about your competence as a tactician if you got a low rank, but none are so hilariously, brutally blunt as Canas. It's even funnier because he's such a Nice Guy.
  Canas: You seem to lack even basic skills.
• Sophia's cameo in the penultimate chapter involves your units finding her in some ruins. Or more accurately, she does a Stealth Hi/Bye on them as they're looking inside, startling whoever you sent. Even Jaffar, a stoic master assassin.
  • Serra and Farina's interactions with Sophia are just the two former screaming their heads off for the entire conversation, at least until the latter gives them an item.
• Supporting Kent and Fiora has the two realize how alike they are. Due to their insistence on being professional soldiers, the two agree to meet up and set up a policy cutting any potential intimacies within the army. Unfortunately for them, Support Conversations are essentially a Matchmaking Simulator. So One Thing Led to Another...
  Kent: Fiora... I must ask you one more thing. When this battle ends, if we both still live...
  Fiora: Please...say no more. I...already know what you will ask... Of course. I feel the same way.
  Kent: Really? I am glad... But...about that policy I suggested... What should we do?
  Fiora: Well... Perhaps... It can wait...
• Fiora and Farina's C support is quite funny, with them starting out trying to apologize to each other, then getting into an argument as they insult each other while trying to apologize.
  Farina: Aw, now look, it’s all behind us... I was just an idiot! You did nothing wrong...
  Fiora: How can you say that? I was terrible to you, and you were right all along! Why can’t you get that through your thick skull?!
  Farina: I’m telling you...I was not right all along! I never should have flown off in a tizzy like that, you dope!
  Fiora: Stop contradicting me! I was wrong! I should have tried harder to grasp your greedy, insensitive ways!
  Farina: Now you listen here, you uptight, worn-out... I—! ...Hey.
  Fiora: ...It’s weird, isn’t it... Why are we even fighting?
  Farina: Um... I dunno.
• In their C support, Canas is shocked to meet Pent, gushing that his wife won't believe it and his wife thinks Pent is "the bee's knees".
  • In their B support, after Pent learns that Canas' unique book (which he accidentally picked up before their C support) was supposed to be passed to one of his ill-fated brothers, he insists on returning it despite how much he enjoyed reading it. Canas says that it's not a problem, because he can just ask his mother to write it again, and that his mother happens to be Niime from the last game. Pent is shocked that he's Niime's son and can't wait to tell Louise, but Canas is just confused about how he knows who Niime is and why he's so worked up.
• While most of the death quotes are pretty sad, Serra's manages to be amusingly unfitting for her death.
  Serra: Ooh! Why me? This is SO annoying!
• It's actually possible to have a character's ending read as "Died at Battle Preparations", as proven in this video.
• Almost anything regarding Sain would count, really, but his support with Louise definitely takes the cake, for one simple reason: in the C-support, he realizes a moment too late that the lady he's flirting with this time is already married. Whoops. Cue self-scolding and intense inner conflict, made worse if he builds up to a B-support with her (the highest he can get with her, by the way). Meanwhile, Louise's reaction to all this?
  Louise: ...What a funny man.
• Denning, the boss of Ch29E31H is also prone to being this, to the point of becoming an Ensemble Dark Horse. While he only has three instances of dialogue, they're all pretty funny:
  Denning, start of chapter: "This is a message from Lord Nergal. 'I await you on the Dread Isle.' This is a message from Lord Nergal. 'I await you on the Dread Isle.' This is a message..."
  Denning, in battle: "This is a message from Lord Nergal. 'I await you on the Dread Isle.'"
  Denning, upon death: "This is...a message...from... Lo...rd...Nerga..."

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