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Funny / 80's Dan

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  • 80's Dan: MCDLT
    • "Why do you hate me lord, is it because I was built by man and not your steady hands?"
    • Dan happening to have a tape about the MCDLT
    • ROB hitting on Mrs. Crabtree throughout the episode.
    • Everyones reactions to Dan's MCDLT, in addition to Dan being completely unfazed by it being covered with green moldy gunk.
      • Dolly: "I"m Pretty sure this is how Invasion of the Body Snatchers started".
      • Dolly: "Dan I've seen Creepshow, this doesn't end well for you."
      • Travis: "I'm, pretty sure I saw one of those pus bubbles winking at me, I'm not sure how I feel about it"
    • The Opening with Dan scaring the crap out of his friend and ROB's joy about him messing himself on the floor "It was worth it"
    • Dan shrugging off ROB telling him that while he came along because he can save him, he won't and just wants the irony to sink in.
    • After Dan throws up the MCDLT:
    Travis:Today, was a good day.
  • 80's Dan: Automan:
    • The constant lampshade hanging about the various parts of the show that it has in common with 80's Dan (having an out-of-place non-human sidekick, not explaining how Dan got where he was, slowly introducing characters... etc.)
    • "Is it too late to name you '80's Douchebag'?"
    • "You remember my lecture on Manimal?" "Yeah, because you started masturbating in the middle of it."
      • What makes it even funnier is Brad's own obessesion with Manimal.
    • "How could you sell out like this Cursor? I saw you do Shakespeare."
    • "Rape is what happens."
      • "Not if you're Automan."
    • "I can turn Gyros and Stack Circles. Screw you Dan. Screw you." (Laugh Track)
    • Dan constantly acting like Dolly knows nothing about the 80's
    • Rob interrupting Automan with Phantasm.
    • Dan attempting to kiss Dolly... only to get a punch in the face.
    • "He doesn't need to scream, he's got Automan."
    • "I sincerely believe that his dreamy good looks killed that man."
    • This exchange after a street light with a lady's voice let's Automan pass:
    Dolly:Does this mean he had sex with that street light?
    Dan: That streetlight had a woman's voice, that clearly means it has a vagina.
    • "I'm not interested in your gangbang videos, Travis"
  • 80's Dan: World Games:
    • The Opening with ROB confident that his letter will be one of many Mrs. Crabtree gets, thus keeping her husband from getting suspicious.... only for Dan of all people to point out she doesn't act and that his peeping doesn't count.
    • "There's only one time to get excited about the Olympics... while watching Cool Runnings".
    • After ROB sees them playing the NES
    ROB: What are you doing with my sex box?
    Dolly: Dammit, ROB, is that why it smells like battery acid?
    Dan: It's okay Dolly. Believe it or not ROB's sex juice is the only thing that can get it started on the first try.
    ROB: Her name is Nessie... and can we quietly change the subject?
    • "Technically, I'm 47."
    • "You actually expect one of those add-ons to work?", "You and me, pistols. Tomorrow. At noon."
    • "As long as all the athletes are white, that can't possibly be racist."
    • "The first 80's cokehead joke of this new series is brought to you by the MCDLT"
    • Any time Dan slaps his knee and laughs way too loud.
    • "Can I ski now?" "Sure, let's watch you die."
    • "You need some classic 80's ski music"
    • Dan and Dolly doing nothing until they notice the commercial is over.
    • "I used to hang out in a lot of bathhouses in the seventies. I'm kind of afraid of large men in diapers."
  • 80's Dan: Hot to Trot:
    • During Travis' griping about Dan and R.O.B.
    Travis: I don't like the way that robot looks at you. I think he has X-Ray vision.
    (cut to R.O.B.)
    R.O.B.: I can also hear upstairs.
    Travis: Oh. No wonder it's terrible.
    Dan: And just what do you have against Oingo Boingo?
    Travis: Nothing I guess, they were good in Back to School.
    Dan: Uh-huh. That's what I thought.
    Dolly: "Most of the time he was on screen I kept wondering if he forgot to take a dump before they started rolling."
    • After R.O.B. takes a dump (which comes out as a battery), Dan goes into a fit of knee-slapping laughter:
    Travis: See Dan? Your reaction there? That's why you like Hot To Trot.
    • The discussion of the villain's teeth
    • "The only reason I'm embarrassed is because I'm around people who don't' like Hot To Trot"
    • ROB's story about a man stuffing thousands of Micro Machines up his ass... and then using ROB's gyros to clean it out it in a sepia toned flashback.
    R.O.B. I still have nightmares about what he did to Polly Pocket.
    • R.O.B.: "Why did he have to sneak a horse around in the first place? He was rich and it was The '80s. It was his god-given right to own a horse."
    • R.O.B's indecision on the ending of his fan-script for Hot To Trot 2: Stable Condition.
      R.O.B.: I'm not sure weather Don should win the medal of freedom for saving the president from a buffalo stampede or die in a mine shaft explosion.
      • And his reason for writing it: he wants to occupy his time doing something no one else could conceivably be doing.
    • "You're thinking too hard about it, they just wanted Burgess Meredith as a fly."
    • The Reveal that they've been talking about Hot To Trot for 8 hours.
    • "I'd stick petrified dog turds in my eyes just to make you feel uncomfortable."

  • In the 80s Dan review of Halloween III: Season of the Witch, the gang is visited by the Ghostbusters of Chicago, who proceed to rob them blind. While ecstatic Dan does nothing have fangasms over meeting the "real" Ghostbusters saying lines from Ghostbusters II.
    • Dolly lamenting why Dan hasn't complimented her costume. Prompting Dan to say that it's the best Donald Duck crossdressing he's ever seen. The Death Glare Dolly gives Dan is simply priceless.
    • Dan's constant grumbling about the film... for the sole reason of not having Micheal Meyers.
      • Dan finally warming up to the film at the end... only to reveal he's done some coke while they weren't looking.
      • Dan's justification for why he didn't watch the Halloween III trailer pointing out it was a seperate universe from the previous films:
    Dan: No one watched trailers in the 80's! We were too busy getting handy j's from the girl peddling Jolt Cola in the lobby.
    Travis: If by "we" you mean you. I don't think everyone had the same experiences in the 80's as you did.
    Dan: Look in the glassy stares in your parents eyes next time you see them. Trust me, we all snorted from the same mirrors.
    • After learning what film they're watching next:
    Dan: Huh, Vampire's Kiss. I'm going to have to call my contact and get us 20 more kilos of the fun stuff.
    R.O.B.: It's me you idiot! I'm your contact!
    • Dan's disappointment at the fairly quiet night the gang's having instead of the wild drugs and sex parties he had in the 80's.

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