Funny / Close Enough

Like Regular Show, Close Enough has hilarious moments, a lot of which derive from surreal and ribald situations.

Moment Subpages are Spoilers Off.

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Season 1

• "Quilty Pleasures"
  • Josh getting distracted from buying thread includes purchasing a zoot suit and a bird that looks like him, who he names "Bird Josh". Bird Josh repeatedly calls Josh a "Dumbass Whiteboy" in Spanish, which Josh interprets as declarations of love.
  • Upon returning to Emily, Josh has to admit he didn't get the thread:
    Josh: I never had time to get the thread. It took me a lot longer than I thought to get that BJ.
    Emily: [slaps Josh] What?!
    Josh: Bird Josh!
  • Emily and Josh run into a bunch of street urchins:
    Calamari: My name is Calamari. And these are my friends—Walleye, Tilapia, Troutface, and Scrode.
    Scrode: It's pronounced "Scrawd"!
  • Emily's "We're Making a Quilt for Candice" song, which heavily implies that they're using the British orphans for sweatshop labor.
  • Josh and Emily wind up having sex under the family quilt that the street urchins made, while Scrode watches from above.
    Scrode: Scrode likey.
  • Upon waking up, the two discover that the street urchins are not actually British children, but short, wrinkly adults with American accents. And they want Josh and Emily to be their parents.
    Josh: We're not your parents!
    Calamari: Of course you are. That was the price for the quilt, remember? Remember? [spiders crawl out of her mouth]
  • Upon Bird Josh's Heroic Sacrifice, Josh is aghast and starts beating up the urchins, using one of them as a bludgeon. Despite only having known Bird Josh for several hours, most of which Bird Josh spent flying away and calling him a "Dumbass whiteboy" in Spanish.
  • Scrode latches on to the front of Josh and Emily's car, whereupon they manage to shake him off, causing Scrode to fly into a mailbox and explode!
  • The revelation that Candice made a quilt patch herself, showing her and her parents naked (which is obscured with pixelation).
• "The Perfect House"
  • Josh, Emily, and Candice coming home from the open house to find Alex creating a conspiracy web trying to link Garfield the Cat to Jesus Christ (and keeping a jug of urine at his side, which Emily thinks is moonshine) and Bridgette trying to paint the kitchen by rolling around in paint in a bikini and tossing herself against the wall.
  • Josh gets so distracted by ordering himself a family bicycle, he loses track of what day it is.
    Josh: Hey, how'd you guys get here so fast? I only ordered it like 20 minutes ago.
    Delivery Guy: Says here you ordered it three days ago.
    Josh: THREE DAYS?! Where the hell is Emily?!
    • The delivery driver thinking that the "Emily" Josh is panicking over is a sex doll that didn't come in the mail (and the delivery driver revealing that he got his own sex doll as a passenger in his truck).
    • He then has to take the family bike, all by himself, out on the streets to find Emily. A bike which, to note, requires eight people.
• "Skate Dad"
  • Josh's attempt at demonstrating his skateboarding skills to his family. It ends badly.
• "100% No Stress Day"
  • The montage of stress triggers in Emily's life: getting an absurdly long student loan bill, putting her clothes in the dryer, only for her load to catch fire ("Sweet cashmere Jesus!"), and finding Candice playing with Bridgette's vibrator (which, for some reason is pixellated, even though the show is on streaming and not television^note though this could be a leftover from when the show was planned for television).
  • Emily freaks out while being high when its effects take a dark turn, and ends up punching Timothy in the eye.
    Timothy: BITCH! Use your words!
  • Alex being stalked by stripper clowns because of a bet he made that one of them couldn't twist his penis into a giraffe (which Alex almost won because the clown twisted his penis into a dog. He lost when the clown got an erection and made the neck longer).
• "Prank War"
  • Josh's coworker, Dante, saying that Josh is so old, if he said something racist, they wouldn't get offended over it.
  • The reason why Bridgette and Emily are taking self-defense lessons from Pearle: Bridgette ditched Emily when the two of them think that they're being stalked by a predator. Turns out it's a Manchild who still plays Pokémon GO years after it stopped being popular and asks Emily if she's seen a Poliwrath anywhere.
  • Josh trying to scare Emily by hiding in the trunk of her car and pretending to be Jason-style serial killer...which backfires when Emily takes an off-road shortcut because of traffic.
  • The sign outside the Pretty Good Samaritan Hospital: "Requiring Employees To Wash Hands Since 1997"
  • One of the rioting female prisoners is a Gremlin from the movie Gremlins.
  • Josh trying to wake up the homeless man in a coma by hitting him over the head with a hammer. He's stopped by the doctor because "hammers are for amnesia".
  • Candice's sugar rush and Alex trying to stop her.
  • Alex: "For the record, I feel really weird holding your daughter while my ass is in this guy's face!"
• "Cool Moms"
  • The "Single Mom" clique, which consists of burned-out and shabbily-dressed moms, one of which is on fire and doesn't notice or care.
  • Randy, Alex, and Josh riding on a pterodactyl who talks to them about the Bible (and says that adultery is his favorite reason for stoning women).
  • The fact that two of the moms in the Cool Moms clique have given two male celebrities diseases (Jojo^note the head of the Cool Moms gave Michael Douglas throat cancer while Billie^note the pink-haired, tattooed one gave Usher herpes).
• "Robot Tutor"
  • When trying to read the tutor's controls to find the self-destruct, Candice needs to remember things with similar letters. So she uses Alex's book on self-esteem, the computer saying the letter D, and an inexplicable "Estruct" shirt Josh bought that we've never seen before. Which are real now, by the way.
• "Golden Gamer"
  • When he taught at UCLA, Alex lectured in-character as "Professor Dorpen-Borat". In a Borat-thong.
    Alex: [Borat voice] Joan of Arc was hot. She burned at stake. Wah, wah, wee, wah!
    • Later on, his students come out to discourage him from doing a dangerous stunt just to impress them.
      Student: It's like that dude Sisyphus. He kept trying to push that car up the mountain, but he couldn't handle it, and he quit.
      Alex: Eh, technically, Sisyphus couldn't quit. But you know what? You got most of it.
      Lee: Well, check this out, Dorp. You're our Sisyphus.
      Alex: [tears of joy] Wah, wah, wee, wah.
  • And then Alex attempts to jump across the buildings, only for him to tumble in the middle between them. Cut to an ambulance with a paramedic carrying him like a baby to the vehicle.
• "Clap Like This"
  • Bridgette discovers that the mannequins at the department store she works at come to life at night and party.
    Bridgette: But, you're man—
    Quinn: Before you ask, yes, we have sex, yes, it's basically licking smooth plastic, and, yes, it's amazing! Whoo!
• "The Canine Guy"
  • Bridgette gets sick of Emily checking on her phone, which distracts her from practicing her guitar. When she does it one more time...
    Bridgette: Here. I'LL SHOW YOU A POST! (throws it, which bounces off a post that scares a blue jay away, a mail post truck, a Post Cereal box, a man reading The Washington Post, a couple who just had sex (with the subtitle on reading post coitus), a copy of The Post, Post Malone, and a basketball player as he says "post up-", ending with the phone flying at the deeper parts of the forest in the distance.))
    Emily: MOTHERF-
  • When Josh finds the address to Dog Boy's kidnapper, he's more annoyed by the fact that it was typed out in Comic Sans than the fact his new friend got taken.
  • Why was Pearl after Meredith Breedmore in the first place? Not for the illegal genetic experimentation,but 6 unpaid parking tickets.

Season 2

• "Josh Gets Shredded"
  • Emily's attraction to Josh's new musculature. It gets to the point she has to shove a lot of ice down her pants in order to talk straight with him.
  • After achieving the "Absolute Unit" level of buffness (which basically means turning into a Super Sayian), Josh accidentally kills his personal trainer by throwing his polaroid camera through his chest after taking a selfie. The trainer is completely fine going out this way.
  Trainer: Worth it, bro!
  • The last guy who tried to achieve the Absolute Unit died after his hamstrings exploded during a squat. There's a memorial plaque of him on the wall.
  • The disgusting protein powder Josh eats during his workout obsession. He prepares it in the yard by pouring it in a bucket then mixing it with water from the garden hose.
  • In the opening, Candice comes home from school talking about how her class watched this super-old movie called King Kong (1933)... only to find out that she actually meant the 2005 version with Jack Black!
• "Sauceface"
  • The list of banned food Mr. Campbell puts up in the cafeteria. A lot of schools do have banned foods, mostly due to allergies since some, especially peanut allergies, can be set off just by being in the same room as the food. Here? The food is banned for ridiculous, PC reasons such as General Tso's chicken (for promoting militarism) and hot sauce (triggering towards people with sensetive palettes).
  • Mr. Campbell recommends expelling Maddie not just because of the hot sauce smuggling, but because the entire operation was clearly lifted from an R-rated movie.
• "Meet The Frackers"
  • Pearle told Randy that his birth parents were astronauts who died fighting aliens on Mars. He never questioned the validity of this until this episode.
  • Pearle tells Randy how his parents abandoned him: When she busted them for siphoning gas, his mom reached behind her, at first to the gun tucked in her pants, but then to the release switch for the baby harness to toss baby Randy at Pearle as a distraction.
  • Randy's parents might be wealthy now, but they're still white trash through and through; their idea of fine dining is a Mc Rib, because they're rich enough to have it on demand year-round, rather than seasonally. There's also the "Hillbilly Mai Thai", which is just a mix of rum and Mountain Dew.
  Randy: This tastes like I'm banging my head on a pole!
• "Haunted Couch"
  • Throughout the episode, Josh keeps trying to sit on the eponymous couch. He never gets a chance, as it turns to dust at the end of the episode.
  • Candice's reaction to seeing Bridgette going at it with her ghost boyfriend.
    (to Josh) [grabbing his collar] "DO. NOT. Go in there." [runs off with tears in her eyes]
• "Man Up"
  • The actor dressed as an alien gives Josh his card via a second mouth in his regular mouth.
  • Randy dresses up as a dog as part of Josh's training.
  • After completing the first phase of his training, Josh accidentally destroys the replica of Emily (a mannequin Randy built out of eggs) that he's supposed to protect.
• "Handy"
  • After Randy catches Pearle and a handyman trying to unclog the toilet, Pearle tries to claim that they're lovers.
  • Randy's less than stellar attempts at repairs, such as duct-taping a beer can to a broken chair leg, or "fixing" a wall clock that's been broken in half by painting numbers right on the wall.
  • While stranded on a deserted island, Randy creates rock duplicates of the other characters, and starts talking for them.
    Rock!Pearle: Son, I'm going to say this in the least racist accent I can do. I'm proud of you!
  • During his time on the island, Randy is visited by three spirits; Bob Vila from This Old House, Tim Allen as Tim "The Toolman" Taylor (who only speaks in his iconic chortle), and the IKEA Mascot, who mentor him in becoming a better handyman.
  • The Reveal that the island Randy was stranded on wasn't deserted at all, it's home to a large vacation resort just beyond the strip of jungle which he apparently never bothered to explore. Not to mention that the "spirits" decide to go get some burgers there after Randy leaves on his raft, making it ambiguous whether or not they're spirits at all, but the actual Bob Vila and Tim Allen who just happened to be there, though the IKEA guy makes it even more confusing.
• "Birth Daze"
  • After several kids birthday parties in a row, an exhausted Josh asks for someone to just kill him already. Cue a kid running up and hitting him in the knee with a bat.
  • The Parents Only party quickly spirals out of control, due to all the adults having lost their alcohol tolerance after having kids, so they end up drunk off their asses.
    Mom: Let's get naked and fight!!
    Dad: I just had a Corona! [slams himself into a table]
  • When fighting sentient pizza slices, Josh and Emily decide to just eat them, scaring the remaining slices away.
  • Alex and Bridget have to babysit all the drunk parents so they won't notice their kids are missing. After Josh and Emily get back after saving them, Alex and Bridget are telling the parents a bedtime story about things only 90's kids would get.
• "Time Hooch"
  • When Josh and Alex first drink the Hooch, they see that Alex's room now has lava lamps, psychedelic posters, a fuzzy rug, and a newspaper with the headline "Man Lands on Moon!". Alex correctly deduces that they're three years in the past, when he started collecting things from the 60s.
  • In the past, Alex said that Kevin Spacey can do no wrong while the present day Josh and Alex cringe as they realize that in hindsight, Alex shouldn’t have said that.
  • All of the past versions of Alex refuse to believe the others are him from the future until they answer a question only they would know... what year he was born! (1982). Once they're convinced, they're always impressed that their future selves are still hot, even though they all look almost identical since Alex's marriage to Bridget didn't last that long.
  • The Alex who's wearing a Borat swimsuit.
  • The Alexes (Alexi?) from the various parts of the past all decide that the only logical thing to do when stuck in dinosaur times is to have an orgy. They get frozen in amber and get their DNA harvested by a scientist planning to clone a caveman, implying that this is how Alex was born, and the entire episode was part of a Stable Time Loop.
• "World's Greatest Teacher"
  • Mr. Campbell's attempt to be cool by joining in on the River Lake's song as "Dr. Jam" is as funny as it is cringe inducing.
    Campbell: (while doing the floss and wearing Jamaican fashion) Gotta floss, airy day.
    Random Student: This feels racist.
• "Where'd You Go, Bridgette?"
  • Bridgette pays so much attention to her phone that she's oblivious to everything else around her.
    • She walks over Randy as he's laying in his inflatable pool.
    • She bumps into several people on the sidewalk.
    • She causes a traffic accident due to taking a selfie in the middle of a busy street.
    • She walks into the cargo hold of an airplane and ends up in Tokyo before entering another plane's cargo hold and ending up back in Los Angeles.
    • This eventually ends up with her being arrested, which she still doesn't notice until Pearle bails her out.
  • After Pearle convinces Bridgette that she needs to deal with her cellphone addiction, she stops texting. After Emily announces to the others that she hasn't gotten a text from Bridget in two minutes, they're all horrified, and Candice tearfully asks is Bridgette dead.
  • When Emily is about to send out a picture of Bridgette asking if people have seen her, Josh questions if the picture they're using is appropriate. It shows Bridgette lounging in a sexy pose while wearing only her underwear.
    Emily: It's the one she told me to use if she ever went missing.
  • Josh joins in on the people accusing him, Emily, and Alex of killing Bridgette because they were given a cool sounding name.
• "The Erotic Awakening of A. P. LaPearle"
  • Alex reads the novel he is working on to his friends. However, it turns out to be heavy erotica, and when it cuts to them, they all have their jaws dropped.
    • Even better, Emily has to cover Candice's ears.
  • Upon seeing Alex, the head of the publishing company vomits into a nearby trashcan.
    • She tells Alex that readers won't accept an author who looks like "a werewolf that got stuck halfway through transforming".
• "Men Rock!"
  • When asking Candace if she really needs to pee, Josh accidentally lets out some of his own anxiety.
    Josh: Do you, really need to pee? Or are you just anxious about mom becoming a celebrity because it makes you feel like less of a man?
    Emily: ...What?
• "Secret Horse"
  • When Josh goes installing TVs in houses with the horse, he eats the money he's paid with the way the horse eats sugar cubes it's given.

Season 3

• "The Weird Kid" has a touching moment between Emily and Candice end in hilarity due to Emily not wearing pants after being restored to adulthood.
  Emily: Candice, I'll never betray your confidence again! I promise you can tell me anything!
  Candice: Okay. I can see your butt. (camera zooms out to show that Emily is hugging her daughter while bottomless with the other kids at school staring at her)
  Emily: Oh, Gosh! (gets up and awkwardly waddles away while trying to cover her nether regions with her shirt) I'll see you at home!
• "Never Meet Your Heroes" has Alex comes to Josh, panicking because someone stole his original body and he's stuck in the guise of an old man. Josh immediately believes him... because apparently the thought of Alex's body being stolen makes more sense than Alex becoming excellent at impressions.

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