Sweaty Beards is a 2010 Swedish movie which aims to answer the age-old question of what would happen if you mix Vikings with Monty Python and The Karate Kid. Oswald is a fat, cowardly Viking living in 10th century Sweden. He's regularly bullied and abused by his peers for his failings, including his considerably more badass brother Sigtrygg. One night, Oswald and Sigtryggs parents are murdered by the evil Finnish warrior, Perset Olale, so Sigtrygg and Oswald decide to seek out the help of Kolskägg, to awaken Oswalds latent powers as a Berserker. This fails spectacularly, not only causing Oswald to be outlawed, but leaving Sigtrygg halfdead as well. Oswald has no choice but to flee to Uppland, where he meets up with King Erik Widearm and the Uppland Freedom Army. Will Oswald be able to become a Berserker and reclaim his familys honor in the island deathmatch tournament?
All of the dialogue is done in an intentionallly exaggerated "Swenglish" accent which can be a real chore to sit through, if you don't find it funny.
This film contains examples of:
- Arrogant Kung-Fu Guy: Sigtrygg, in spades.
- Anachronism Stew: Jean Guillou is a Renaissance swordsman in the 10th century. The whole movie is also framed as a filmmaker shooting a documentary and getting a little too close to the action. (Gee, were did they come up with that funny and original idea?)
- Beware the Nice Ones: Oswald Swinesmell.
- The Berserker: Oswald again. we also get to see an unrelated one in the beginning.
- Berserk Button: For Oswald it's indecisive women. Of course, it's a literal Berserk Button for him, causing him to go Berserk and withstand Persets poisoned knife-blows, thus defeating him.
- The documentary filmmaker catches a sword to the midsection from a random Viking, because he mentioned Persets name.
- Covers Always Lie: You see that cover up there? Hildegunn is a passive love interest in the movie, she never fights. Oswald doesn't wear chainmail, and Sigtrygg is never seen using that giant axe.
- Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: Oswald, and it takes a while before he weighs over if favor of the latter.
- Devil in Plain Sight: In the tavern, Perset Olale calmly and clearly states who he is and that he killed Oswalds parents. Oswald promptly challenges him to a deathmatch... and then does the same thing to everyone else in the room.
- Implausible Fencing Powers: Jean Guillou fights equally well with both hands and can throw his Royal Rapier like a boomerang. Too bad nobody taught him no to drop his sword, though.
- Made of Iron: The documentary filmmaker has earned this title, going through all of the movie with a sword through his stomach and still managing to complete his documentary and fight Perset just for good measure.
- Villain Teleportation: This is Persets entire fighting strategy.
- Warrior Poet: Oswald tries to compose a Viking "kväde" after killing Jean Guillou. It's awful.
