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Film / Project Million

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Project Million, or Fuck the Internet: A Summer Vacation is a forty-five-minute long short film made by Robert Million. Inspired by the Channel Awesome Anniversary Movies, it is the first internet-reviewer-based movie to be created that is not officially associated with them.

As Diamanda Hagan sits comfortably in Haganistan, contemplating her "invasion" of Channel Awesome, she decides to turn on the news to see what they're saying about her. Upon tuning into Critic TV, she discovers that all of the staff has left because of an impromptu Floridian vacation, which is no biggie since nothing important happened that week. This doesn't go over too well with Hagan.

Meanwhile at Disneyworld...

Robert Million, Shark Wayne, Spazzmaster, The Wire, and LC have arrived in Florida to enjoy a relating vacation at Disneyworld. They are later joined by Cin Wicked, who came for fun, and Mikey Insanity, who stowed away in LC's suitcase. Unfortunately for them, Diamanda has crossed the Atlantic and plans to murder them all one by one...


Project Million provides examples of the following tropes:

  • Ass Shove:
    Minion: That sniper rifle was a pain in the ass to get through security. Literally...
  • Berserk Button:
    • Diamanda’s invasion of Channel Awesome being deemed “nothing important”.
    • Cin’s reaction to the Canadian artists on display.
  • Chekhov's Random-as-Fuck Guy: Conspiracy Guy.
  • Deadly Guest: Hagan in Shark Wayne’s bathroom.
  • Funny Background Event: Spazz spends several minutes in the background trying to determine exactly what the hell the Wire was trying to say.
  • Hand Wave: How The Wire got out of her TV. See Mind Screw below.
  • Little Stowaway: Mikey Insanity.
  • Mind Screw: The Wire trying to explain how she got out of her TV to Spazz.
    Spazz: How did you get here?
    Wire: Get where?
    Spazz: Like, here. In reality.
    Wire: I'm not here.
    Spazz: *poke* You are.
    Wire: No I'm not.
    Spazz: Well then what the hell am I doing, dreaming?
    Wire: No, not this time.
    Spazz: I thought that was an insane Inception reference?
    Wire: It was, that time. This time it's a Dream Within a Dream.
    Spazz: But isn't that also an Incep - how are you here?!
    Wire: I crawled through a river of shit and came out the other side clean, okay?!
  • No Spazz Puppets Were Harmed: That’s a lie.
  • Noodle Implements: Several suitcases during the opening montage contain these, which include a large stuffed dinosaur, a baseball trophy, their cat, and at least 100 boxes of playing cards.
    • Special mention must go to Robert’s, which contains only these: a bra, a hard hat, a porcelain duck figurine, a cinderblock, a clown wig, candy canes, a Bedsheet Ladder, and a Renoir.
  • Poke the Poodle: The Minion’s plan to torture Mikey: steal his vegetarian pizza!
  • Offhand Backhand: LC to Spazz when the latter tries to run away in Disneyworld.
  • Roaring Rampage of Revenge: Diamanda's reason for coming to Florida.
  • Shout-Out: “It’s time. To hit the beach.”
  • Squee: Spazz concerning Disneyworld.
    Spazz: Disneyworld? You mean the Disneyworld the one that opened in 1971 housing the four theme parks home of the Magic Kingdom Animal Kingdom Epcott and Hollywood Studios? Why aren’t we there now?!
  • Suckiness Is Painful: “It’s a small world” causes Diamanda noticable stress.
  • Too Kinky to Torture: LC.
    Diamanda: I used all of my most powerful torture techniques. Thousands perished when I was creating them...and he fucking enjoyed it!
  • Unusually Uninteresting Sight: Averted. Diamanda knows that she doesn’t exactly “blend in”, especially in Disneyworld.
  • Why Don't You Just Shoot Him?: Because we’re in the happiest place on Earth, and we’re going to make killing them fun!
  • Worked Shoot: The promotion for the movie on Reviewtopia was played as the people involved in the Project (and supporters) getting into an argument about hosting the movie, resulting in an invasion by the Robert and the changeover to Milliontopia, with parodies of reviewers coming up. Eventually, a video was posted revealing that Robert was assisted by Mr. E (An alternate personality for Enigma and Mr. McMahon Expy) and the site hosting Project Million.
    • What Could Have Been: The plan was for the Project Million guys to be the heroes of the whole fight, but Reviewtopia's fanbase refused to side against the site, thus turning the entire work on its head.
  • You Are Number 6: The minion featured in this is specifically Minion # 14933121

Aleister: Why the fuck wasn't I in this?!

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