Lost in the Andes! is a Donald Duck story written by Carl Barks in April 1949 and published in Dell Comics' Four Color Comics #223.
Our story starts in the Duckburg Museum, where 4th assistant janitor Donald Duck is tasked with dusting off a collection of rocks taken from an archeological dig in Peru. While handling some strange stone cubes, Donald drops one and it breaks open to reveal egg yolk. The discovery of "square eggs" sets off a flurry of excitement; scientists are perplexed by their nature, egg dealers are giddy at the thought of eggs that are easier to stack, and farmers wonder at what kind of chicken laid the eggs. With the record of the eggs' origin lost in the Great Chicago Fire, all anyone can figure is that they were found somewhere in the Andes of Peru. An expedition sets out, an expedition that includes our favorite family of Ducks.
During the voyage to South America, Huey, Dewey and Louie are tasked with preparing omelettes, but they can't find any regular eggs. They decide to use the square eggs, and this causes the rest of the expedition to fall ill from eating well expired food. By the time the boat arrives in South America, the only ones recovered enough are Donald and his nephews, who spend the entire time blowing bubblegum.
Their attempts to find the source of the square eggs starts badly, with locals regarding the Ducks as either goofy or potential suckers. Finally, they meet an old Peruvian who tells them that his father found the "blocks" on an American explorer he found at the edge of the region of mists. The American died shortly after, and the eggs were sold to a friend in Cuzco, from where they made their way to the Duckburg Museum. With a solid lead, the Ducks head off into the mists.
After some wandering, the Ducks find a lost, isolated village full of little people with blocky bodies. Even stranger, they speak English, with a Southern American accent. This is because the last visitor was from Birmingham, Alabama, Professor Rhett Betlah, so the locals have patterned themselves off of southern hospitality. The village is called "Plain Awful", named after Proffessor Betlah's description. The "Awfultonians" live on good cheer and a diet of square eggs. However, they have no idea what chickens are, simply finding the eggs lying around on a plain outside the village. While looking around, the nephews put one of their bubblegum on a larger block, and discover it's in fact a square chicken folded up.
The discovery of the square chickens causes a stir, and the Awfultonians take to starting their own square chicken farms. But when showing how they found the chickens, the nephews get in trouble- it is forbidden to bring anything round to Plain Awful! However, since they found the chickens, the president of Plain Awful gives the Duck brothers a chance to redeem themselves; All the have to do is blow square bubbles! Although an impossible task in practice, during the moment of truth, the nephews pull it off! Confiding in their Unca Donald, the nephews reveal that they hid square chicks under their shirts, and gave them some bubblegum to chew. Then, they just squeezed and made it look like they were blowing square bubbles.
Nonetheless, the Ducks are still trapped in the Andes, as they have no way to get home. While exploring Plain Awful, they find a museum full of things left behind by Rhett Betlah. One of these things is a "magic gizmo" AKA, a compass! The Ducks teach the Awfultonians square dancing in exchange for the compass, and with a bunch of square eggs for rations and a pair of square chickens, head back to America.
At the Duckburg Museum, Donald presents the square chickens, only for both of them to crow- square roosters! Thoroughly humiliated, Donald, Huey, Dewey and Louie retreat to a diner for a proper meal. Upon hearing the menu of ham and eggs, omelettes, and roast chicken, Donald flies into one of his trademark tantrums.
Don Rosa would later create a sequel to this adventure, "Return of Plain Awful", featuring Scrooge McDuck.
Tropes
- Ascended Extra: The ancient hunter who points Donald and the kids towards the Region of Mists would show up again in a couple of Don Rosa stories, usually with his Catchphrase "These Americanos are crazy!"
- Berserk Button: The chickens of Plain Awful have an instinctive loathing for anything spherical or round; they attack the kids after Huey unknowingly sticks a round bubblegum bubble on one. The people have a similar visceral reaction, calling round things "sacrilege".
- Blind Without 'Em: Reaching his limit, Donald breaks a square egg open in front of an old man and asks if he's seen anything like it. The old man replies that he can't see anything at all because his glasses broke. He's able to recognize the square eggs by touch, however.
- Chekhov's Gag: The kids spend much of the early part of the story chewing bubble gum, and annoying the people around them with the bubbles. Unfortunately, it turns out that making round objects is illegal in Plain Awful, and the kids get in serious trouble over it.
- Damned By a Fool's Praise: While looking for the source of the square eggs, Donald and the kids run into a man who's trying to fly by tying wings to his arms. He introduces himself as the "Goofiest Guy in the Andes", then asks what Donald's up to. Donald tells him about the square eggs, and the guy decides Donald's got him beat for the title.
- Delegation Relay: A brief Running Gag at the beginning is that Donald is typically at the bottom of these.
- Disproportionate Retribution: For blowing bubble gum (more accurately, ROUND bubbles), the kids are sentenced to be put to work in the local rock quarry for life - unless they can blow square bubbles before the populace in five days' time.
- Eldritch Location: Plain Awful is a bizarre place, though not particularly dangerous. It's a Lost World in a valley in the Andes where everything - the geography, the people, the buildings, the chickens, the eggs - are patterned in square and cubical shapes. We never learn why such a strange place exists, or anything about its history before Professor Betlah came along. The closest thing we get to a hint is an ancient four-foot-high stone wall in the Region of Mists, ringing the cliffs around Plain Awful.
- Fog of Doom: The Region of Mists, which covers Plain Awful and keeps it isolated. People without a lot of luck (or a compass) tend to wander around in the thick vapor, totally disoriented, until they starve, fall off a cliff, or wander back out.
- Foreshadowing: During the brief showing of the Awfultonian raiasing square chickens, there's a brief gag where one Awfultonian claims to have a coop of chickens that only crow. Sure enough, Donald probably took his chickens from that one.
- Funetik Aksent: The Awfultonians, due to the influence of their last vistor, a professor from Birmingham, Alabama, speak with southern drawls.
- Hidden in Plain Sight: The Awfultonians themselves don't even know about the square chickens at first, and simply collect the eggs they leave behind. It turns out that they live in a nearby valley away from their village, and curl up into cubical stone-like forms to hide whenever anyone comes near. The only way anyone else discovers the truth is when Huey sticks a round bubble on one.
- I Don't Like the Sound of That Place: Plain Awful itself. It's a Non-Indicative Name, though, since the people are helpful and friendly.
- Loony Laws: Producing something round is the most heinous crime known to the people of Plain Awful.
- Multipurpose Monocultured Crop: The square eggs are (initially) the Awfultonians' only source of food. Downplayed in that this little tidbit of information sends Donald and the kids into a panic, realizing that they won't be able to survive such a diet in the long term.
- Perfect Pacifist People: The Awfultonians are extremely peaceful and friendly. Just don't show them anything round. The "round" bit is apparently the only law they have on the books, because they don't need any others.
- Rage Breaking Point: After an entire adventure for square eggs and nothing to show for it, Donald and his nephews go to a diner for a meal. When the chef offers ham and eggs, cheese omelette, and roast chicken, we cut to a police patrol car who gets an alert about a duck wrecking a diner.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: The leader of Plain Awful. He mostly serves as a representative of the people, and seems genuinely saddened when the kids' bubble gum gets them in trouble. When they seem to blow square bubbles, he's overjoyed at the sight.
- Running Gag: Huey, Dewey, and Louie blowing bubblegum.
- "Shaggy Dog" Story: Ultimately, because they brought back a pair of square roosters, the expedition for more square eggs nets a big, fat, goose egg.
- Small Reference Pools: An in-universe example. The Awfultonians have had no contact with the outside world in nearly a century, and their civilization seems to be stuck in the stone-age version of Medieval Stasis. Any outside influence is an enormous development in their history. As a result, they remember a single visitor from decades ago with great fondness.
- Tastes Like Chicken: Surprisingly averted - the Plain Awful chickens are extremely tough, and the Awfultonians have a very hard time trying to eat them.
- Trauma Button Ending: After enduring over a week of eating nothing but eggs (and some very tough chicken) in Plain Awful, and almost getting killed several times in adventures surrounding them, Donald and the kids go to eat at a diner. The fellow manning the counter suggests a handful of chicken and egg-based dishes to eat... see Rage Breaking Point, above.
- Way Past the Expiration Date: The nephews make an omelette from the decades-old (probably older) square eggs and give the rest of the expedition stomacheaches.
