Characters appearing in What the Cut.
Antoine Daniel
The host of the show himself, somewhat cynical and misanthropic, maybe even insane and/or psychopatic, but given the quality of the videos he watches, it's understable. Nevertheless, he subjects himself to it for the work.
- Anime Hair: He's got a crazy hairdo most of the time.
- Berserk Button: Vertical black line on the sides of videos filmed with iPhones. He often fills them up with himself doing stupid stuff afterwards.
- Hypocritical Humor: Claims that burning toilet paper to get revenge on them is a stupid idea because toilet paper doesn't talk, then asks Samuel for approval. Samuel is a talking fan.
- They Killed Kenny Again: He often kills himself (after viewing a video especially weird or disturbing) or is shot by someone standing offscreen (or, sometimes, an other Antoine) after saying something especially bad. Anyway, he always is back one in full health one second later.
- Instant Soprano: During a couple of seconds in #29, after lighting his pants in fire to imitate the German artist. He regains his normal voice after clearing his throat.
- It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time: Tries lighting his trousers on fire after seeing the "Pipi Caca" guy doing the same with his diaper. He claims to be fine for half a second before screaming in pain.
- Large Ham
- Pædo Hunt: Comes across quite a bunch of videos with creepy adult men acting too touchy-feely with kids, and is appropriately disgusted.
- Porn Stache: Grows one for the Indian Videos special.
- Pungeon Master
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: Decides to leave his own series after witnessing the "Pipi Caca" music video. He still comes back right after to keep reviewing it.
- Self-Deprecation: Tends to get his sarcastic remarks or bad puns called off... by himself.Antoine: What would you say if I asked you to imagine together eagles, bodybuilders, ugly 3D, dance music... and Tunak-Tunak?Another Antoine: You really are the worst of all shits!Antoine: What? No! Well, yes, but... No!
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: He even starts every video by insulting the audience.
- Steel Eardrums: Averted, a video where the (bad) singer sings too loud makes blood sprinkle out of Antoine's ears.
- Strangely Arousing: Whenever something sexual, no matter how weird, happens.Antoine: Why am I having an erection?!
- Suckiness Is Painful: Likes to iron his face or light his hair on fire to alleviate the pain from a bad song.
- Talking to Themself: Often has sosies of himself respond to his comments or questions, or simply his own voice from off-screen.
Richard
Antoine's talking plush dog. Has a gravelly voice and many vices not expected from a plush.
- Ax-Crazy: In the intro of episode 36 he shout: Fuck yeah, I love killing people!, while gunning down mooks.
- The Dog Was the Mastermind: Is sometimes revealed to be behind very weird videos.
- Mr. Vice Guy: Whenever the video has sexual content in it, Richard will manifest enthusiasm.
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Gets one of himself to replace him while he goes to Michel's music video.
Samuel
A talking electric fan. He doesn't talk very much however, and mostly stands silently and motionless in the background.
- Distressed Dude: At the start of #34, he's kidnapped and Antoine and his friend go to save him.
- Robo SpeakI-am-a-fan.
- Trailers Always Lie: His first appearance is in the What The Cut?! spoof trailer, and seems important in it, but actually talks once in a blue moon.
The Clear and Accurate Explanation guy
A character that occasionally appears in short segments in order to explain some of the weird stuff that is too baffling even for Antoine to properly react to. However, his explanations often don't help at all. Played by Antoine.
- Non-Answer: Is a master of this.The congolexicomization of market laws is when the market laws are congolexified.Because it's shit.Because Japan... Anyway, how's it goin'?
Professor Pedoncule
A drunk geography professor who appears whenever someone mentions something confusing about geography. His interventions don't help at all. Played by Antoine.
- Japan is... orange...
- The Alcoholic: He's always drunk.
- Gag Penis: According to him, a map of Norway, Sweden and Finland looks like a dick.
Jeff Surf
The leader of a pacifist movement introduced during the war against the space pirates. Constantly tries to convice people to stop fighting, but always ends up getting killed himself.
- Actual Pacifist: He's a pacifist whose mindset is to consider everyone his friend. Too bad for him that he lives in a chaotic web series where people act violently for no reason.
- Character Catchphrase: In two out of his three appearences, he says "We're all friends, after all". In both case, he's killed right after saying that.
- Nice Guy: He genuinely wants to be friends with everyone.
- They Killed Kenny Again: He dies in the intro of every episode he appears in. Due to the random humor of What The Cut, no one questions him coming back alive.
- Too Dumb to Live: Gets shot in the head while giving a pacifist speech to Antoine, who then says:I knew we shouldn't have come for a picnic near that paintball field with real bullets and no paint!
The Squirrel Man
Also known as the Murderous Squirrel from the Deep Void, he's a mysterious man wearing a squirrel mask. He's insanely fond of nuts; according to Richard, both types of nuts, in fact. He first appeared in a few cutaway gags, but gained greater importance in #36: after pestering and stalking Antoine for weeks, he stole Richard's nut (not really, as plushes have no penises or nuts; he actually owed him 25 bucks) leading Antoine to start a massive search for him all over the world.
- Ascended Extra: He's originally a minor character, and he becomes the villain of episode 36's intro.
- Funny Animal: He's an anthro squirrel.
- Not Quite Dead: He was left for dead in the battle of episode 36's intro, but The Stinger reveals that he's still alive.
- Stock Animal Diet: As a squirrel, he loves nuts, obviously.The Murderous Squirrel From The Deep Void presents his new restaurant, where you can eat nuts, nuts and more nuts, goddammit!
