Characters from the roleplay No Matter What Happens I Still Won't Be An Anime Character
Kokoro Sakura
Our protagonist, and an absolutely normal girl. She lives the most boring life imaginable, as opposed to every anime character in existence.
- Cosmic Plaything: Throwing Call after Call at her, and preventing her from dyeing or hiding her hair.
- Crazy-Prepared: She owns body armour and a pile of burn phones incase a Call slips by her.
- Dark and Troubled Past: Partially Defied.My father offered to hire some abusive grandparents, but I declined.
- Fourth-Wall Observer: Only the inner one, hence the event flag avoiding.
- I Just Want to Be Normal: Her tireless pursuit of being normal drives the main Conflict.
- Ironic Name: It's Japanese for "Cherry Blossom of the Heart."[Introducing Self]: "Kokoro Sakura, 3-C."Newbie immediately starts snickering. "'Kokoro Sakura', seriously?"
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: She'll sacrifice anything (including other people) to avoid The Call, but she's as nice as can be whenever she's not doing that.
- Missing Mom: Invoked by the Mom herself.When I was six, my memory still developing, my mother left us in tears. She said it would further my character development.
- Name Order Confusion:
Word of God says that which of her names is which is undefined, but that he prefers to think of it as "Kokoro" being her given name because it "ensures 'pink haired protag[onist] named Sakura' literally runs in the family." For clarity, all other characters in this work are referred to by either their given name first or their given name by itself. - Parental Abandonment: In addition to her mother's complete abandonment mentioned above, Sakura's father doesn't live with her anymore. Justified since he and she both know how dangerous a teenager is to be around in this world.
- Pet the Dog: The Red Shirt Memorial web page.The site login barely takes a few minutes; adding their names takes longer.HideakiShouKatashi
- Properly Paranoid: She thinks that the universe is trying to drag her kicking and screaming into a fantastical and dangerous adventure through innocuous events. She's right.
- Seen It All: Her response to a news program about giant monsters appearing out of a portal in an ocean is dry annoyance.
- Utility Belt: She keeps her pepper spray and burn phone in one of these.
Kumiko Vasilyevykh
A childhood friend of Sakura's, which is to say she should be treated with extreme caution.
- Butt-Monkey: She gets lots of comical mishaps. At first.
- Childhood Friends: With Sakura, which is one of the reasons that she an antagonist. Those things are inherently linked to the plot.
- Custom Uniform: She wears the jacket of the male uniform over the shirt of the female uniform, with suspiciously bulging pockets, and a beret on sideways.
- Eyes Are Unbreakable: Averted (presumably) for one eye and played straight for the other.
- Forgotten Friend, New Foe: At first. To be fair, it’s not her fault; it's just that Sakura's goal is to avoid getting roped in to whatever it is that's going on around her.
- Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain: Insofar as she is a villain, with her main motive being to warn us of something. She is still certainly an antagonist, and the tutorial villain, so she can't be the most competent of foes we will have to deal with. Sakura has even started treating her alright whenever she shuts up about the plot.
- Overly Long Name: Kumiko Fujioka Leblanc Cartwright Vasilyevykh.
- Violence is the Only Option: Her reaction to being mugged? We're not sure, but it involves multiple explosions. It gets deconstructed in that she kills someone the audience genuinely cares about.
Hayate Kurosawa
Leader of the Red Shirt Gang and a friend of Sakura's.
- Face of a Thug: ExaggeratedHis face terrifies yakuza, curdles milk and gets threatened with exorcisms every other Thursday. Crows flock in his wake; lunch money falls out of pockets as he goes past.
- Fourth-Wall Observer: Though, like Sakura, only the inner one.
Kiyoshi Kita
A Red Shirt with a surprising combination of common protagonist qualities.
- Always in Class One: He's in 1-A.
- Anime Hair: Specifically, spikes.
- Idiot HeroA young brat, new but brash; spikey haired, short, determined to win at card games because that's what important in life.
