A list of the presenters and team captains over the years. Prior appearances on the show before becoming captain/main host is denoted in (brackets), while primary time on the show aren't in brackets.
Mark Lamarr
"This has been Never Mind The Buzzcocks, and they said I couldn't polish it."
1996-2005
The original host of the show; TV and radio personality as well as a former team captain on another comedy panel show.
- Author Appeal: He is a big fan of reggae. When Jimmy Cliff was on the show, Mark kept awarding Phil's team points for "just having Jimmy Cliff in".
- Digging Yourself Deeper: Invoked by his "I say I liked it, I tolerated it - I say I tolerated it..." routine.
- Driven to Suicide: Parodied, as he seemingly becomes more and more fed up with his job.
- Farm Boy: Often portrayed as this in earlier series and tie-in books due to being from Swindon, occasionally putting on an exaggerated "oo ar me deario" voice and claiming it's his "natural" accent.
- Important Haircut: His original 'Fifties Throwback' quiff was cut off as a charity stunt in between series.
- Jerkass: Deadpan Snarker extraordinaire to the point of obnoxiousness. In all fairness, some of this is somewhat justified due to the arrogant and/or irritating nature of some of the guests.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Notable when a guest he particularly liked appeared on the show, such as Jimmy Cliff and Faye Tozer.
- Running Gag: From around Series 8 onwards he seemingly tried to invoke at least one of these per episode, such as THE VOICE OF ROCK or constantly playing with clips of a particular song.
Phill Jupitus
"Need room to work? Shouldn't be on TV with me then, sweetheart."
1996-2014
Team A captain and the only regular to have appeared in every season of the original run of the show; stand-up comedian from Essex who also appears in other panel shows such as QI.
- Author Appeal: Likes Star Wars and will take any opportunity to segue into doing a Chewbacca impression.
- Big Eater: If Mark's jokes are anything to go by:Mark: Phill cooked Christmas dinner for eight, but before he could eat it, some people turned up...
- The Constant: Has appeared on every main episode of the original run of the show until 2014.
- The Hyena: Every other episode he is often caught howling with laughter at someone else's joke.
- Impossibly Tacky Clothes: Some of his shirts in the earlier seasons were questionable at best.
- Man of a Thousand Voices: Parodied. Mark claims the majority of Phill's impressions consist of saying a celebrity's catchphrase (e.g., "Ooh Betty" for Frank Spencer) in the same throaty Bernard Manning voice.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Blue to Bill or Noel's red.
- Self-Deprecation: "I'm the Jabba the Hutt of jokes."
Sean Hughes
"Well, I'm getting it from all sides now!"
1996-2002
The original Team B captain; Irish comedian, writer and actor who was best known for his tenure on this show.
- Beware the Quiet Ones: Just because he was the more laconic of the original three regulars, doesn't mean that he wasn't equally as capable as Mark or Phill to make a cutting insult.
- Deadpan Snarker: Helped by his monotone southern Irish accent.
- For the Lulz: Would often just make silly noises during the Intros Round, and more than a few times he would lose an episode against Phill's team despite being in the lead before Next Lines due to him preferring to give stupid answers and goof around.
- Puppy-Dog Eyes: Once successfully used on Mark to score a point.
- The Quiet One: When he left the show, Mark commemorated him with a montage of 'his contributions to the show', which consisted of clips of Sean's other team members answering questions while Sean sat quietly in the background.
Bill Bailey
"The last time I was on, you called me a Klingon nonce!"
(1998, 1999),2002-2008
The second Team B captain; comedian, musician, actor and all round Renaissance Man known for his ability to play many musical instruments as part of his comedy.
- Author Appeal: Likes science-fiction, especially Star Trek.
- Butt-Monkey: Under Mark Lamarr's tenure. Not that Phill and Sean were much better off.
- Cuckoosnarker: While most of his humour is light, quirky oddball stuff, he can be snarky when he wants to be.
- Early-Bird Cameo: Was a guest on the show before becoming team captain.
- Nice Guy: As team captain or as a guest on the show, he's generally friendly to his fellow panelists.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Red to Phill's blue.
Simon Amstell
"I'm Simon Amstell — and if you think I'm a poor booking, let's meet tonight's guests!"
(2003, 2005), 2006-2008
The second permanent host; former Popworld presenter, where he quickly became known for his vicious put-downs during interviews with various pop stars.
- Author Appeal: He's a fan of Patrick Wolf. When Patrick appeared as a guest, Simon didn't insult him once.
- Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: His general persona on the show. Nobody is safe, unless you're one of the rare people Simon likes.
- The Dog Bites Back: Falls victim to this when he mocks his guests one too many times. One notable moment was when Davina Mccall found footage
of Simon's appearance as a young lad on a 90's morning show, imitating Dame Edna Everage. His first line in that clip made the audience laugh. - Early-Bird Cameo: Appears as both a guest host and panellist prior to time as a host. Notably, Lamarr jokingly accuses him of trying to steal his "act", which he does a year or so later.
- Heroic Comedic Sociopath: Not only would he cut his guests and other celebrities down to size, he would do so with the utmost glee.
- Jerkass: Consistently smug, condescending and arrogant, with the occasional glimpse of Jerk with a Heart of Gold, such as Amy Winehouse's infamous second appearance - though he did find the time to mock her in the same show as well as during Mark Ronson's appearance.
- Twofer Token Minority: Simon is gay and Jewish.
Noel Fielding
"I'm loving this show this week, 'cause I'm usually the weird one."
(2007), 2009-2014, 2021-Present
The third and final Team B captain; co-creator of The Mighty Boosh and TV personality.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Like Bill, he’s known for being eccentric and occasionally wears unusual costumes onto the show.
- Dude Looks Like a Lady: As is the case with Noel Fielding.
- Early-Bird Cameo: Like Bill, was a guest on the show before becoming team captain.
- Impossibly Tacky Clothes: Pretty much his trademark.
- Perky Goth
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Red to Phill's blue.
Rhod Gilbert
"I'll take you down into battle right now! Go on, you start!"
(2006, 2009, 2011), 2014
The third permanent host; Welsh stand-up comedian who regularly appears in other panel shows such as Mock the Week.
- Early-Bird Cameo: Like Simon, he was a guest on the show, as well as a guest presenter before becoming a regular host in 2014.
- Nice Guy: Compared to Simon and Mark at least — but like every other host, he tends to make fun of those not on the show.
- Off the Rails: Tends to forget rules due to his inexperience at hosting, so the team leaders either have to remind him what happens next or let it slide for comedic effect.
- We Hardly Knew Ye: Was the host for only one series.
Greg Davies
(2009, 2011), 2021-Present
The current host of the rebooted version of the show; Welsh stand-up comedian who appears in multiple other panel shows and is best known as the Taskmaster.
- Early-Bird Cameo: Appeared multiple times as a guest host and guest during the original series prior to becoming the host.
- Large and in Charge: He is perhaps the most physically intimidating host of the show.
