The Argentos
José "Pepe" Argento
Played by: Guillermo Francella
Pepe Argento, victim of a universe turned against him
Pepe Argento (AKA: Al Bundy) is the father of the Argento family. His life is a complete hell, in all possible manners you can conceive... and then some others.
- The Ace: Prior to his marriage.
- Alpha Couple: With Moni.
- Awful Wedded Life: If you ask him...
- Butt-Monkey
- Can't Live with Them, Can't Live Without Them: With his family, and perhaps with María Elena too, if the series finale is anything to go by.
- The Chew Toy
- Chick Magnet: Turns into one in an episode, much to Moni's dismay.
- Deus Angst Machina: He lost his chances to be a football player, he has a lazy wife that is always asking for sex, two mistakes of nature as children, a dog that just stays there, a pathetic job, ugly and demanding customers, a neighbour that hates him and always tries to humiliate him, perpetual poverty... and that's just the Status Quo, each new episode provides yet another way of being turned down.
- Go-Karting with Bowser: He played football with Death himself!
- I Coulda Been a Contender!: He wistfully thinks that he could have been a player of "Club Atlético Racing Club", but unfortunately for him, it could not be.
- Jaded Washout: Argentinian version of the former trope namer.
- Smite Me, O Mighty Smiter: Pepe always complains to "Barba" (a nickname for God, lit. "beard") about his pathetic life and all the ways the entire universe turns against him.
- Tranquil Fury: When he wants to kill his wife. Once, he even attempted to do it, but got constantly interrupted by other anti-climactic events when he took a knife and marched towards her.
Monica "Moni" Argento
Played by: Florencia Peña
Moni Argento (AKA: Margaret "Peggy" Bundy) is Pepe's wife. All she wants in life is to have sex with him and watch Susana Giménez on the TV.
- Alpha Bitch: It's revealed in the episode of her high school reunion that she was one back in the day.
- Catchphrase:
- "¡Cafecitooooo!" (Coffee!) when something goes to hell.
- "¡Callate, mierda!" (Shut up you turd!) when silencing the stupid antics of her children.
- When she, angry, says the word "mierda", she tends to draw out the first syllable and roll the R.
- Deadpan Snarker: She has her moments, most often with Pepe and María Elena.
- Dreadful Musician: She tends to break out into song-and-dance numbers, and (unwilling) spectators often react poorly.
- Humble Goal: Just have passionate sex with Pepe for more than 5 minutes. Is that so much to ask for?
- Lazy Bum: Watches TV all day, while neglecting to do basic tasks like grocery shopping and feeding her children.
- Lovable Sex Maniac: Much to the horror of her husband, Moni has bouts of sexual desire for him.
- Tomboy and Girly Girl: With María Elena. María Elena is always angry, violent, resented and plotting vengeance against Pepe, while Moni simply wants to see half-naked men and have sex with her husband.
Paola Argento
Played by: Luisana Lopilato
Pepe and Moni's daughter.
-
Dawson Casting: Averted. Unlike her brother, the actress was 17/18 years old when she started to play Paola.
- Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold: She does have a good heart, and cares about her family and defends them, for instance defending Coqui at school.
- Lovable Alpha Bitch: A few moments hinted this. The most notable one is when she tied up a girl in front of the school wearing just her underwear, for everyone to see (then again, she did deserve it after doing something similar to Coqui previously).
- May–December Romance: She briefly dates the state governor, but leaves him upon finding out he's married.
- Put on a Bus: Due to the actress being unavailable at the time of filming, Paola was sent to a modeling school for some episodes of the second season.
Alfio "Coqui" Argento
Played by: Darío Lopilato
Pepe and Moni's son.
- All Love Is Unrequited: For María Elena.
- Catchphrase: "Papucho/Mamucha" (Daddy/Mommy) when referring to Pepe and Moni.
- Dawson Casting
- The Ditz
- Even the Guys Want Him: His good looks have been emphasized by many male characters throughout the series.
- Favors for the Sexy: All the time.
- Humble Goal: Just to have sex for the first time. Is that so much to ask for? YES!
- Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places
- Lovable Sex Maniac
- Only Known by Their Nickname: Few people even know his real name is Alfio, in honor to a football coach Pepe admires.
- Precocious Crush: Coqui loves María Elena with all his heart, and wants to have sex with her... and her rejection for him is only second to Pepe.
- Stalker with a Crush: Has been known to spy (or trying to spy) on María Elena showering.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: With Paola. He most often mocks her promiscuity and her inability to control her sexual desire.
Fatiga
The Argentos' dog. True to his name ("fatigue"), he's often seen lazily sitting or laying down on the couch or on the floor.
- Cross-Cast Role: An animal variation, as Fatiga is actually played by a female dog.
- Empathy Pet: He is as lazy as Pepe — if not lazier.
The Fusenecos
María Elena Fuseneco
Actress: Erica Rivas
- The Alcoholic
- Berserk Button: Pepe. Pepe. PEPE ARGENTO!!
- Catchphrase: "¡Callate, pendejo!" (Shut up dumbass/twerp!) when rejecting Coqui's advances.
- Cute and Psycho: Of a non-Ax-Crazy variety. She's cute, hot, and honestly believes she has a daughter that only she can see!
- Deadpan Snarker: With Pepe, for any reason. With Moni, when they argue. With Dardo, when he desires other women, or to remind him of his old guilts. Well... with everyone.
- Evil Laugh
- Happily Married
- Insatiable Newlyweds: With Dardo, often making a display of their active sex life, in contrast with Pepe and Moni's almost non-existent sex life.
- Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy: With Dardo.
- Sitcom Arch-Nemesis
- Straw Feminist: Sometimes goes into rants in which she passionately tries to empower women and denounce men as pigs.
- Tomboy and Girly Girl: With Moni. Moni just wants sex, love, sex, romance, sex; but who will plot Pepe's ultimate downfall if not María Elena?
Dardo Fuseneco
Actor: Marcelo de Bellis
- Chick Magnet
- Happily Married
- I'm a Man; I Can't Help It
- Insatiable Newlyweds: With María Elena, often making a display of their active sex life, in contrast with Pepe and Moni's almost non-existent sex life.
- Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy: With María Elena.
- Mr. Fanservice
