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Blue Mountain State Football Team (The Mountain Goats)
As a Whole
- Book Dumb: The highest GPA that we know of a football player has had was a B+ (Craig Shilo in "Midterms"). In addition, they all have their own nerds doing their academic work for them, eventually leading to a boycott in the episode "Nerds" after Sammy accidentally puts one of the nerds in a coma.
- Dumb Jock: They're not the sharpest knives in the drawer.
- Everybody Must Get Stoned: "Drug Olympics".
- Frat Bro: They all fit the stereotype to some degree.
- Jerk Jock: Although they are the focus of the show, this doesn't mean that they're very nice people. The show doesn't really focus on their treatment of people lower on the social hierarchy than them, other than their personal nerds for Rule of Funny.
- Karma Houdini Warranty: Their antics cause huge damages to the school, involve many illegal acts, and violate various NCAA rules. They seem to get away with it until the episode "Death Penalty".
- Male Frontal Nudity: The players on the football team, after the student body suspected them of not having penises/sending dick pics that weren't their own, create a large poster that shows that they did have penises and that most of them sent their own dick pics.
- Wacky Fratboy Hijinx: Despite the fact that the football team isn't a fraternity (or if there is a football fraternity, there's never a mention of it other than the letters Sigma Delta on the Goat House), this is basically what the show revolves around.
- Wild Teen Party: They're not teenagers, but every weekend at the Goat House is a wild party.
Alex Moran
Alex Moran
Played By: Darin Brooks
The Second String Quarterback, later becoming the Starting Quarterback of the team.
- Brilliant, but Lazy: He's actually pretty smart, but does not really want to put in the effort, preferring to let the nerds do his homework while he gets drunk and/or laid. He's also a competent, talented quarterback, but likes being a second-stringer who doesn't get knocked around as much. When the coach makes him a starter, Alex works his ass off to get himself bumped back down to the bench. He starts changing in Season 3 though.
Backup quarterback is the best position in sports! It's like starting quarterback, only without the pain!
- The Casanova: Most of the football team is popular with the ladies but Moran is most popular with them.
- Deadpan Snarker: He comments a lot on the insane shenanigans of the school.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Sammy.
- Hidden Depths: During Season 3, it's revealed that the reason Alex slacks off is because he thinks that BMS will be the peak of his life and it will all go downhill afterward. He just wants to enjoy it as a benchwarmer rather than possibly screw up as a starter and let people down. He gets over it after Coach Daniels tells Alex that he has the talent to be great and go pro if he actually puts in the work.
- High-School Hustler: College version.
- Only Sane Man: Usually keeps his head and tries to fix whatever problem is going on.
- Professional Slacker: Gives Jeff Winger a run for his money with the way he plots to avoid responsibility and work. Though after a pep talk from Coach Daniels in Season 3, he starts in put in more work on the football field.
Sammy Cacciatore
Sammy Cacciatore
Played By: Chris "Romanski" Romano
The team mascot.
- Butt-Monkey: Nothing rarely ever goes right for him.
- Casanova Wannabe: He tries though even with the encouragement of his best friend and half-sister, he fails.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Alex.
- Lovable Sex Maniac: He's pretty likable despite his libido.
- My Sister Is Off-Limits: Inverted. Sammy is more than happy about his best friend dating his half-sister and even suspects the two will be married.
- The Team Wannabe: Sammy believes being the mascot entitles him to living the same high life as the football team. It takes Radon (who has befriended the nerds) to make Sammy realize he's no jock. He points out he's small, has no athletic abilities outside being the mascot, is not a chick magnet, does his own homework, is not concerned with his personal hygiene, has no sense of fashion and to top it all off, the BMS captains sold him out to the nerds as the one who put their friend in a coma.
Thad Castle
Thad Castle
Played By: Alan Ritchson
The Team Captain and Linebacker of the Mountain Goats.
- Ax-Crazy: Thad is completely and utterly nuts.
- Big Brother Instinct: Naturally to his little sister Alma.
- Extends to the team as well, as Thad will tolerate no offense to any of his teammates from anyone who's not a football player. Even if the teammate getting pranked/threatened/assaulted/insulted is somebody he normally treats like crap.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: This guy is a savant at football to the point where he made captain as a sophomore. Also, his utterly bizarre ideas when it comes to football (such as the infamous oil change) do work and shows he has a good grasp of how the team is. However, he is colossally insane. Alex puts it best in the movie: "Really good football player. Really horrible person."
- Expy: He is the early 2010s equivalent to Steven Stifler. The biggest difference being his dedication to football.
- Freudian Excuse: His father was a soldier who was KIA during the US intervention in Bosnia when Thad was in preschool, which severely impacted his childhood development.
- I Call It "Vera": His pocket pussy, which he received as a memento of his father, is named Oksana.
- Hypocrite: Wants his sister to leave a stripclub arguing that it’s degrading towards women, even though he arrived before her.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Sometimes, he is shown to not be all bad. Many of the things he does are because he genuinely believes—in his own completely batshit way—that he's helping.
- Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: Other times, he's way too selfish.
- Large and in Charge: He's the tallest and biggest of the main cast, as well as team captain and the instigator for a lot of their schemes.
- Large Ham: He is loud, dramatic and bombastic, treating football with a large amount of devotion and gravitas.
- Mr. Fanservice: He's quite good looking and buff so little surprise he is quite popular with the ladies... and some of the guys.
- My Sister Is Off-Limits: He invokes this word for word when Alex asks Alma out. Initially he’s not successful, especially since Alma is perfectly fine with going on a date to a Stripclub, twice. While he does have this attitude, he cannot stop Alma from dating Alex and the best he can do is try to tell her off.Thad: “ALMA, NO. DIRTY!“
- No Indoor Voice: Certainly fits with being a ham. He can be quiet at times.
- Only Known by Their Nickname: His first name is actually Kevin. Everyone started calling him "Thad" back when he was a kid and tried to say he was sad his dad died, but he had a lisp and it sounded like he said "Thad" and everyone picked on him. He eventually started calling himself Thad to suck it up.
- Psychopathic Manchild: Beyond acting like a stereotypical frat boy, he's got a pretty childish and warped view of the world and how he pursues things. Heck, his flashback showed him being pretty child-like as a teenager. The psychopathic part comes from being pretty goddamn nuts.
- Screams Like a Little Girl: His scream is unexpectedly more similar to a prepubescent girl than you'd expect from a 6'2" muscular football player.
- Serious Business: Practically everything. The more ridiculous, the more serious. Weirdly enough, this is why Coach Daniels named him captain in the first place.Daniels: All he does is care. He would light his mother on fire if it would help us win a game.
- Testosterone Poisoning: With a side of rabies...
Craig Shilo
Craig Shilo
Played By: Sam Jones III
The Starting Running Back.
- Back for the Finale: He comes back for the film and helps out Alex.
- Butt-Monkey: For much of season 1, nothing went right for him. Its telling that things turned around for him as soon as he dumped Denise.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Alex.
- Only Sane Man: Compared to The Slacker Alex, the Ax-Crazy Thad, Manchild Sammy, and the rest of the football team, he's much more reasonable and tries to avoid the worst of the shenanigans.
- Put on a Bus: After Season 1, he leaves Blue Mountain State and transfers to Georgia Tech. Justified, as he probably didn't feel an attachment to the place anymore after dealing with everyone's antics and finding out his girlfriend was cheating on him.
- What the Hell, Hero?: After finding out his girlfriend has been cheating on him while forcing him to be abstinent, he promptly gives her a brief one of these and walks out on her.
Radon Randell
Radon Randell
Played By: Page Kennedy
The Starter after Craig leaves.
- Dark and Troubled Past: Played for Laughs. He grew up dividing his time between the inner city and juvenile detention centers.
- Glass Cannon: While he's a talented player, he's also injury prone. Eventually he has to retire from football entirely.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He's very egotistical and can be a massive asshole, but he does have his positive moments. Notably, he quickly befriends his nerd and supports them in their campaign against the football team.
Larry Summers
Larry Summers
Played By: Omari Newton
The Defensive Back.
- Ascended Extra: He starts of as a Satellite Character to Thad, but starts hanging out with the other players in the third season.
- No-Respect Guy: In the movie, he's become a graduate assistant coach. Unfortunately, none of the players treat him as a superior because they still see him as their friend/teammate.
- The Quiet One: In some episodes, he doesn't speak at all.
Donald "Donnie" Schrab
Donald "Donnie" Schrab
Played By: Rob Ramsay
The Center.
- Straight Gay: Is revealed to be gay in The Movie.
- Those Two Guys: With Harmon.
Harmon Tedesco
Harmon Tedesco
Played By: James Cade
The Placekicker.
- Hidden Depths: Moran walks in on him...painting a remarkably good classical rendition of St Basil’s Cathedral. From memory.
- Only Sane Man: Less so than Moran, but he is often the voice of reason (or at least lesser stupidity).
- The Stoner: He is by far the biggest drug user on the team.
- Those Two Guys: With Donnie
Coach Martin "Marty" Daniels
Coach Martin "Marty" Daniels
Played By: Ed Marinaro
The Head Coach.
- Cool Old Guy: While he's strict with the players, he's also a former NFL star who has lived the high life. He and Alex wind up bonding over tales of their exploits.
- Not So Above It All: Normally, he's frustrated by his players' off the field antics and reminds them that their college days are going to end very soon. However, there are times when he gets caught up in the craziness with them, such as when he learns about the prank war with the lacrosse team and orders Thad to do what is necessary to get back at them for burying Alex in the practice field.
- You Are Better Than You Think You Are: Gives Alex one of these speeches to motivate him into pushing himself to live up to his potential.
Coach Jon Hendricks
Coach Jon Hendricks
Played By: Kwasi Songui
The Assistant Coach.
Other members of Blue Mountain State
Denise Roy
Mary Jo Cacciatore
Mary Jo Cacciatore
Played By: Frankie Shaw
Sammy's younger sister who joins the cheerleader squad.
- Abhorrent Admirer: To Alex. While different in that she is exceptionally attractive, she's also the younger sister of his best friend, whom Alex doesn't want to hurt. They eventually hook up at the end of Season 2, but Sammy is not only fine with it, but ecstatic.
- Ambiguously Bi: Spends most of Season 2 chasing after Alex. Starts ignoring him in Season 3 in favor of girls. Eventually tells Alex the truth in The Rise of Thadland.
- Brilliant, but Lazy: Entered BMS on a full academic scholarship, is in Pre-Med, but doesn't attend a single class because she'd rather drink and party.
- Foolish Sibling, Responsible Sibling: She's more level-headed than Sammy, though that's not really a high bar to clear.
Dean Simon
Dean Simon
Played By: Ted Atherton
- Dean Bitterman: He hates that people only care about the BMS football team and partying and not the academics.
- Jerkass Has a Point: He's highly antagonistic against the Goats.... because they're a bunch of drunk, horny, destructive jerks who bring the university's reputation and credibility as an academic institution down.
Debra Simon
Debra Simon (formerly Debra Daniels)
Played By: Denise Richards
Marty's ex-wife and current girlfriend.
