While the Seattle Mariners have usually never been a particularly good baseball team, they do have a reputation for making interesting and unusual television commercials. Most of them feature the players themselves acting (or at least trying to act), and they often shoot for a Kitschy Local Commercial feel despite having the budget to do "better". They also tend to be surprisingly trope-heavy.
All the ads can be found here.
Tropes
- The Ace: Ken Griffey Jr. (aka "Junior") was often presented this way, being able to hit the ball anywhere he wanted, catch any fly ball in the city of Seattle, and generally do whatever he wanted.
- Acid Reflux Nightmare: After the Mariner Moose had a nightmare about being replaced by a latte mascot, Jamie Moyer blames it on the nachos he ate before bed.
- Alleged Lookalikes: José López and Yuniesky Betancourt as the "doubleplay twins" dress identical, but look absolutely nothing alike.
- Autobots, Rock Out!: Gold glove winner Kyle Seager gets his own
So Bad, It's Good Hair Metal theme, "Hawt Corner" - Bald Head of Toughness: Invoked as the commercials liked to portray bald right fielder Jay Buhner this way, as a leader figure who's baldness makes him more imposing. However, that didn't stop his baldness from also being used as a joke from time to time. One ad had him distracting opposing players with sunlight reflected off his bald head.
- Call-Back: During his Mirror Routine with Robinson Canó, Edgar Martínez displays the "light bat," a bat-shaped lamp that he made in a commercial 15 years previous.
- Catapult Nightmare: The team's mascot, the Mariner Moose, bolted up after a nightmare about being replaced by a latte mascot.
- Clapper Gag: One ad had Edgar Martínez install a Clapper on the stadium lights so he could easily turn them on and off during late night batting practices. Predictably, this caused problems when the fans were applauding during a game.
- Comically Missing the Point: After an extended Mirror Routine comparing Robinson Canó and Edgar Martínez, some coaches decided that Canó's swing was similar to Junior's.
- Companion Cube:One commercial showed designated hitter Edgar Martínez treating his bat this way, hanging out with it in the park, taking it for car rides (even buckling it up), and even bringing it to a massage parlor. Unfortunately, tragedy struck when the bat broke. Fortunately, he found another bat that he liked just as much
- The Dreaded: One ad featured an opposing pitcher seeing a psychologist over his fear of facing Ken Griffey Jr.
- Early-Installment Weirdness: The 1995 ads didn't feature the players at all, but rather showed actors talking about them.
- Elvis Impersonator: One ad showed pitcher Félix Hernández (aka "King Felix") dressed as a variety of different kings. One of them was the King of Rock.
- Good Old Ways: Third baseman Kyle Seager is shown to be a practitioner. He's "so old school that he tweets on a manual typewriter."
- Handy Remote Control: According to one ad, Edgar Martínez has a remote in his car that controls the Safeco Field (now T-Mobile Park) retractable roof. He keeps it right next to his garage door opener.
- Inkblot Test: An opposing pitcher sent to therapy over psychological trauma from having to pitch to Ken Griffey Jr. is shown a variety of inkblots, and sees Griffey in all of them.
- Me's a Crowd: In one ad, the Mariners cloned Ken Griffey Jr. so that he could play every position at the same time.
- Mirror Routine: One ad had Robinson Canó and Edgar Martínez (at the time of airing, Edgar had retired from play, and was acting as the team's hitting coach) perform such a routine. Robinson adjusts his hat, and Edgar adjusts his hat. Robinson touches his ear, and Edgar touches his ear. Robinson holds up a lamp, and Edgar holds up the light bat, a baseball bat-shaped lamp that he made in a commercial 15 years earlier. Immediately afterwards, two coaches decide that Robinson Canó's swing is a mirror image of Ken Griffey Jr.
- Painfully Slow Projectile: Jamie Moyer's changeup was treated as being so slow that the catcher could take off his mask and carry on an extended conversation with the batter before it reached home plate.
- Shibboleth: One ad had Edgar Martínez teaching non-English-speaking rookies some useful local phrases, as well as a few Pacific Northwest shibboleths, like "geoduck" or "Puyallup".
- Super Fly Reflexes: One ad had Jay Buhner hit an annoying fly with his baseball bat. It splats against the outfield wall, causing Buhner to complain that he "didn't get under it."
- Totally Radical: Parodied: At the advice of a PR person, "Old School Kyle Seager" re-invented himself as K-Swag, a jewelry-wearing, slang-spouting walking stereotype.
