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* MagnificentBitch: [[SocialClimber Ethyl Ermengarde Stubbs]] is TheIngenue, a DamselInDistress, and the single most intelligent GoldDigger in the story. Coveted by a variety of romantic suitors for her beauty, the wicked Squire Hardman tries to force Ermengarde's hand in marriage by threatening to foreclose the farm of Ermengarde's parents. Ermengarde attempts to elope with a rich nobleman, only to show her true nature by figuring out his infidelity and pitching him out of the window of a moving train. Ermengarde manages to convince an old woman to make her her heiress, making her a rich woman--but not as rich as Squire Hardman. Even when it's revealed the old woman is Ermengarde's mother, Ermengarde instead brilliantly reverses the Squire's [[AndNowYouMustMarryMe forced marriage scheme]] back on him to ensure she gets as much money as possible under the threat of prosecuting him for his prior crimes. When all is said and done, sweet, seemingly innocent Ermengarde is the only winner in the story.

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