History WebVideo / StuartAshen

Self-described "failed psychologist"[[note]](He does, in fact, have a doctorate in psychology, though he claims to have never professionally worked in the field)[[/note]] Dr. Stuart Clive Ashen, or simply Dr. Ashen or Ashens, born 16 December 1976, is the premier source on Website/YouTube for {{review}}s of {{Shoddy Knockoff Product}}s -- primarily electronics and toys. He also reviews equally horrible retro British games in a series called ''Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of'' (which evolved into a crowdfunded book published by Unbound of various bad, old computer games), and [[BileFascination most horrifically of all]], really cheap and/or really old processed food. He has also created two small series of comedy videos for the BBC Comedy Extra website, named ''Ashen's Tech Dump'' and ''Back Space''.

His Website/YouTube page is [[https://www.youtube.com/user/ashens here]] (his overflow channel is [[https://www.youtube.com/user/extraashens here]]) and his Twitch channel is [[http://www.twitch.tv/ashens here,]] which is usually live on a Wednesday. He also served as the narrator for ''WebVideo/NinjaTheMissionForce'', duplicating the LargeHam British narrator of Godfrey Ho's films. In 2016, he and Internet chef Barry Lewis created the channel WebVideo/{{Barshens}}, which is available to watch [[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCDYytfm5PZin4N0hT_nLxDQ here.]]

* BitingTheHandHumor: During the WLL review, [[spoiler: the Website/YouTube staff terminate the video when he mocks the partnership program.]]

** Another one that's been going for a while - a single frame of a bald, bearded man popping up in several videos as a RunningGag (see SubliminalSeduction below). It finally comes to a head in ''Quest for the Game Child'': [[spoiler:it's Website/YouTube user WebVideo/{{Mentski}}, the actor who plays one of the prisoners that beats up Nemesis during the credits]]. This one has climaxed with Ashens providing a link to the man's [=YouTube=] channel at the end of the ''MCM May 2015 and other stuff'' announcement video.

** In his Website/YouTube ''Series/{{Knightmare}}'' "[[InNameOnly remake]]" Stuart lists as his special skill: "[[VideoGame/TheSecretOfMonkeyIsland he can hold his breath for ten minutes]]."

* SurrealHumour: Occasionally indulges in this; in the 10th Anniversary Anti-Spectacular Ashens says Website/YouTube used to be a "little mouse made of tarpaulin that orbited the Earth and beamed down psionic waves that told you about the cheeses of the world".

Self-described "failed psychologist"[[note]](He does, in fact, have a doctorate in psychology, though he claims to have never professionally worked in the field)[[/note]] Dr. Stuart Clive Ashen, or simply Dr. Ashen, born 16 December 1976, is the premier source on Website/YouTube for {{review}}s of {{Shoddy Knockoff Product}}s -- primarily electronics and toys. He also reviews equally horrible retro British games in a series called ''Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of'' (which evolved into a crowdfunded book published by Unbound of various bad, old computer games), and [[BileFascination most horrifically of all]], really cheap and/or really old processed food. He has also created two small series of comedy videos for the BBC Comedy Extra website, named ''Ashen's Tech Dump'' and ''Back Space''.

He co-starred in the sci-fi webseries/[[AlternateRealityGame ARG]] ''WebVideo/TheProxy'', which ran through March 8th-17th, 2012. Unfortunately, the contest aspect, [[ProductPlacement not-so-subtly sponsored by Alienware]], [[OfferVoidInNebraska was available only for those living in the UK.]] Regardless, it is available to watch worldwide [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTY9p4-nT6k here]].

He has made two crowd-funded films. ''[[WebVideo/AshensAndTheQuestForTheGameChild The Quest for the Game Child]]'', is a Z-movie in which he searches for the eponymous knockoff game system, while ''Film/AshensAndThePolybiusHeist'' is a fully produced indie film in which he organizes a team to steal the only remaining copy of the eponymous urban legend. He also appeared in the ScienceFiction film ''Film/TheDarkestDawn'' and the indie horror film ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7hWK-AhikE Paper Jam]]''.

* BigDamnMovie: ''WebVideo/AshensAndTheQuestForTheGameChild''. Followed up with ''Ashens and the VideoGame/{{Polybius}} Heist''

** The game [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0I7aGuOdtHo has been]] [[http://www.mediafire.com/?znmyfxnufmm defictionalized]], including a UsefulNotes/ZXSpectrum [[http://www.worldofspectrum.org/infoseekid.cgi?id=0024891 homebrew flavor.]] At least one Let's Play channel not familiar with Dr Ashen reviewed it ''under the impression it was a real game''.

** His review of the Chintendo (or "Ken Sing Ton") Vii showed that it was a simplified [[UsefulNotes/NintendoEntertainmentSystem NES]] in design with a UsefulNotes/{{Wii}} controller slapped on, 2D Platform/PlayStation 1-esque graphics, weighed nothing even with a small lump of useless metal inside it, and had cost him financially and mentally very much. His reason for giving it a 0/10? No lanyard (when the box said there would be one included).

* AutoTune: His review of [[UsefulNotes/IOSGames LaDiDa]] has him turn the Auto Tune up as high as possible because of RuleOfFunny. [[HilarityEnsues Improvised hilarity does indeed ensue]].

** He [[RageQuit rage quits]] the Welcome Park app in his UsefulNotes/PSVita review after he felt patronized by it.

** In [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hLP-v3JXxM the 8th Pop Station Watch episode]], Stuart remarked that the only good thing about the [[UsefulNotes/WiiU Wii U's]] name was that if you said it repeatedly in a high pitched voice, it'd sound like a police siren. Cue him doing [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BH9QPZA8sK8 exactly that]] a year later in his review of the Wii U.

** And twice more during [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nor09lJ80zE his video of the original]] UsefulNotes/GameBoy:

** At the end of his Game King review, he calls the British royal family an "ugly and outdated embarrassment with no real power behind it." (Comparing them to the Game King unit.) After he says this, a fake UsefulNotes/Xbox360 achievement notification pops up reading: "Achievement unlocked: Treason".

* TheElevatorFromIpanema: The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJXlFcAaSIk [=HaiPad=] review]] has him humming this tune during the many loading lags. Later, the UsefulNotes/WiiU's lags almost destroyed his ability to whistle, he was called on to do it so much.

* AccidentalMisnaming: During the [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9R1DoxviIKY PCP Station LTPS Handy Game]] review, Ashen accidentally refers to the [[UsefulNotes/PlayStationPortable PSP Go]] as the "PCP Go", immediately correcting himself after doing so.

** His review of the Chintendo (or "Ken Sing Ton") Vii showed that it was a simplified [[UsefulNotes/NintendoEntertainmentSystem NES]] in design with a UsefulNotes/{{Wii}} controller slapped on, 2D UsefulNotes/PlayStation 1-esque graphics, weighed nothing even with a small lump of useless metal inside it, and had cost him financially and mentally very much. His reason for giving it a 0/10? No lanyard (when the box said there would be one included).

* MatryoshkaObject: Lampshaded in his UsefulNotes/PlayStation4 unboxing video, referring to the packaging as going "Russian doll on us."

** A subtle EasterEgg one: in [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnF-1viB6nY this video at 3:35]], all of the UsefulNotes/PlayStation2 games on the shelf are [[ShowWithinAShow Games Within A Show]] from other pieces of media (except for ''VideoGame/{{Polybius}}'', which is more of an [[Main/UrbanLegends urban legend]]).

* ViewersAreMorons: He takes offense at the UsefulNotes/PlayStationVita's "Welcome Park" tutorial program, which has the voiceover of a children's show. He doesn't even give it 10 seconds before he [[PrecisionFStrike rudely cuts it off]].

** His very early reviews are very short compared to later ones, sometimes running to less than 3 minutes, though this can also be attributed to YouTube's video length policies of the time.

* ChuckCunninghamSyndrome: In the early years of the channel, bit characters like the Silver Skull, Chef Excellence (namely in puppet form before the release of the Game Child movie) and Quincy, the caterpillar who sang obscure Beatles songs, made regular appearances in his videos. Since the mid-2010s, these characters have been quietly retired and their appearances had gotten scarcer even by that point.

* PutOnABus: Noseybonk and the Godmonster of Indian Flats, once recurring characters from Ashen's early videos haven't reappeared in years. He's explained that there wasn't much suitable footage of the Godmonster in the first place, so maybe he ran out and didn't want to recycle anything. Even Chef Excellence who at a time appeared so often he was practically a CreatorsFavorite, rarely appears anymore. Quincy the Caterpillar Who Sings Obscure Beatles Songs was also a recurring favorite, but he was fired for singing a Monkees song instead (presumably he was dropped to avoid the legal hassles, just like the original version of Chef Excellence).

* LimitedWardrobe: When he films himself, he almost always is wearing a suit with his trademark red tie.

* DroppedABridgeOnHim: A mild example. In the end of [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6e6r-NOq5U POP Station Watch 6]], Chef Excellence makes an appearance as a puppet and Stuart asks him how he is now that he was replaced on the Stay Fresh line. They parted on sour terms.
** The Chef Excellence puppet did eventually reappear--a better example is the fate of Quincy, the caterpillar who sings obscure Beatles songs.
** And now Chef Excellence, this time played by a regular actor instead of appearing as a puppet, is scheduled to appear in Ashen's movie. Dan Tomlinson is playing the Chef.

** His earlier videos occasionally had his pet guinea pigs making cameo appearances but the passing of time resulted in them dying of old age. His go-to pet since then has been Oscar, his poodle.
** His very early reviews are very short compared to later ones, sometimes running to less than 3 minutes.

He co-starred in the sci-fi webseries/[[AlternateRealityGame ARG]] ''WebVideo/TheProxy'', which ran through March 8th-17th, 2012. Unfortunately, the contest aspect, [[ProductPlacement not-so-subtly sponsored by Alienware]], [[OfferVoidInNebraska was available only for those living in the UK.]] Regardless, it is available to watch worldwide [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iOfVgZYu28 here]].

* TheArtifact: Ashen's stylized illustration in his title card depicts him with hair, even after he shaved it off in 2020.

* MascotWithAttitude: At one point he said that Chef Excellence's Stay Fresh Cheese Bags sounded like the sign-off of an Eighties mascot — "Stay fresh, cheesebags!"

** After making the Gingerb- shortbr- cookie house during his [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTeQs4-3CAY 2013 Chrismas food video]], he sang a little while cleaning up.