History WMG / MyImmortal

[[WMG: It's AllJustADream]]
Events happen one after another without explanation. Odd names are associated with familiar characters - sometimes many names for a single character. Some articles of clothing in the fic don't exist in RealLife - for example, leather fishnets. And that's only the start.

* Though in the case of leather fishnets, they could be one of the things made possible by Hogwarts magic. After all, chocolate frogs that actually jump around don't exist in real life either.

[[WMG: The reason why there's 2000s emo music in the 1980s.]]

...is because Morty Mcfli downloaded them on his iPod and brought them back to show his friends in 1980. In Back to the Future, Marty was in a rock band. It makes sense that he'd want to show his friends what music in the future would sound like.

[[WMG: Expanding on the above theory: Morty Mcfli jammed with Lucian's band in the 80s.]]

That's why he gives Enoby the time machine besides not knowing her at all. He wants her to go back and save his friend, Draco's dad, from getting shot. He can't go do it himself because he never got along with Satan/Vlodemort. Enoby would have the advantage of none of the players in 1980s scenario knowing who she was.

[[WMG: Ebony doesn't actually travel to the past]]
She actually just projects herself into the mind of Tom, thus altering his perceptions and filtering the world through her own viewpoint. This explains his knowledge of the future and why she can't be killed. In his new state Tom causes changes to history that make the world into the crazy wannabe goffik nightmare from Ebony's time, thus allowing her personality to be formed into what it is and go back into hsi mind to make the changes. Stable time loop created through the use of the Pensieve ad Time Turner together.
** Did you just make a coherrent guestamation about My Immortal in a way that is actually plausible and sheds light on the story?
** But how do you explain Dumbledore remembering his meeting with Enoby in the past? And he calls attention to them being "stupid goffs." And how she saved Lucian's arm. Unless Ebony is projecting herself into everyone else's mind and the world is also changing.

[[WMG: It's AllJustADream on the part of one of the canon characters.]]
They might've released the books under fiction, and someone had a bad dream after reading some very weird FanFic involving a MarySue.

[[WMG: There are no [[GroundhogDayLoop Groundhog Day Loops]].]]
What she was actually going for was the same thing you see in the beginning of books and sometimes the beginnings of acts, where you have an excerpt from later on as a way of enticing people. She just handles it as well as she does everything else, so it comes off instead as incredibly clumsy and appears to be part of the story.

[[WMG: There ARE [[GroundhogDayLoop Groundhog Day Loops]]!]]
Think about it. Voldemprt (Yes, I spelled that right) could travel though time, and Ebony does so later on. Notice how ''all the Groundhog Day Loops somehow involve Volxemort.'' ~anonymous

[[WMG: Voldemort is grooming Enoby to take his place as the Dark Lord.]]
Think about it: she's certainly dark and evil enough. She just needed a little incentive to turn her from a lazy JerkAss into the powerful, har-working witch she becomes later on. He saw potential in her.

Think about it. There is very little physical evidence that she like-liked Vampire before Draco was kidnapped (besides ''one'' observation on his looks). When she finally screws him, she mentions before-hand how he looks ''exactly like Draco.'' She keeps him around as a love interest because she has a fear of being left without Draco. (Once, when he screams that no one understands him, Ebony is very hurt and freaks out.)

Thus explaining why they're allowed to keep their jobs. I mean, they spied on a girl taking a bath, videotaped her, and had sex in the hallway. Not to mention, being against Enoby. Think about it. ~anonymous

Think about it. How do you explain him getting Enoby and Draco out of trouble in the earlier chapters? Either he's [[TheMole working for Enoby while pretending to be working for Voldemort while pretending to work for Dumbledore]], or her dating Draco was important to Voldemort. [[FridgeBrilliance And it is important for Ebony to be with Draco, so Voldemort could extort her.]]

[[WMG: The iPod that chonges into a time machine is a [[WesternAnimation/TheTransformersTheMovie Transformer]]]]
Specifically, a new Triple Changer incarnation of Soundwave who was sent back in a bid to spread the Decepticon ideology to the wizarding world so the Decepticons could find a way to use magic as a new weapon against the Autobots. Unfortunately, the way interferes with technology caused him to be locked in iPod mode and sent his consciousness offline. When he chonged into a time machine, that was his consciousness coming back online and him regaining at least some of his ability to transform. However, he has elected to hide his true nature until such time as the circumstances are right to gain trust of Volsemort and the Death Dealers and take them to the future to aid the Decepticons. It is possible that the cideo camera/caramel is another transformer, who may also be mode-locked and unconscious/offline.

[[WMG: My Immortal is an alternate universe...]]
Where Music/JohnLennon survived being shot by Chapman (December 1980). After the assassination attempt, Music/TheBeatles, who were already discussing having one in our timeline, go on a Reunion tour. During the tour, they start jamming, write some songs and eventually collaborate on an album afterwards. Between experimenting with their styles and Lennon still recovering (mostly psychologically by this time) from the assassination attempt, it is a fair bit darker than their previous albums, hence "Goffik" in Ebony's eyes.


[[WMG: There's actually been a severe [[ThePlague Ebola Zaire]] outbreak at Hogwarts, and this is the [[ApocalypticLog disjointed ramblings]] of a sufferer.]]
Think about it. The [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ebola_Zaire#Signs_and_symptoms symptoms]] include irritability (explaining why everyone's so angry at each other), psychosis (explaining...[[CrackFic well, everything, really]]), bleeding from needle sites or cuts (explaining how much blood flows out when Ebony slits her wrists), red eyes due to internal haemorrhaging (explaining Vampire's "red contact lenses"), occasional haemorrhaging ''from'' the eyes (explaining the TearsOfBlood), [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Petechia petechia]] (perhaps explaining the odd makeup patterns), general malaise (explaining how depressed everyone is), and extreme and disturbing inflammation of the sex organs (explaining why the author says "thingy" and "u-know-wat"–she doesn't want to {{squick}} us out.) The story, which a sufferer believes to be her life's chronicle, ends abruptly when the author goes into the final stages of the disease, [[NightmareFuel convulsing on the ground, gushing blood, virus, and bits of sloughed-off internal tissue everywhere]] before she finally, almost mercifully, [[CruelAndUnusualDeath dies.]] The only thing ''not'' explained here is that Ebola usually causes you to puke up massive amounts of food, digestive juices, and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick your own intestinal tissue]]. Then again, the author may have left that out in order to prevent her readers being squicked (like why she called genitals the above euphemistic terms), or else it might be an entirely different strain of Ebola that doesn't cause bloody vomiting.

[[WMG: "Azerbaijan" isn't a misspelling of "Azkaban"; Professor Sinister, Snap, and Loopin were all ''actually sent there''.]]
* More specifically, they were imprisoned in [[VideoGame/ModernWarfare Al-Asad's safehouse.]] The remnants of Ultranationalist force sent to assault the village after Al-Asad's death saved them and sent them back to Hogwarts.

More specifically, a Franchise/StarTrek-type mirror universe - good guys go bad, while the bad guys don't necessarily become "good" (although they view themselves as good, of course).
Some character traits are "flipped", some are "twisted" to become darker.
Look at the characters:

Draco is... actually a bit in character, but his dislike for Harry Potter comes from a different reason.

Harry is in Slytherin, which is just the House he was ''begging the Sorting Hat not to be placed in.'' He also hates Muggles.

The Weasleys seemed to be an intact family - now they're a complete mess.

Hermione was a Muggle-born bookworm - her My Immortal version never touched a book and has dead vampire parents.

Neville, the other option for the ChosenOne, now has a backstory that is similar to what the Dursleys told Harry, the ''real'' Chosen One. Also - ever seen a clumsy vampire?

Dumbledore, who always seemed a little crazy, but in a ''good'' way, has a serious mental illness.

[=McGonagall=] seems to be her usual strict self, but then she hands over students for Snape to torture...

Snape, who used to favor Slytherin, now is in Gryffindor (which, in a strange way, even makes a tiny bit of sense) and hates Slytherin more than he used to dislike Gryffindor.

Lupin, whose lycanthropy has been taken as a metaphor for child abuse, now is a pedophile (says Ebony).

Professor Trelawney's drinking problem has been turned into a (sort of a) drug problem.

Hagrid was never expelled.

Professor Umbridge... well, just went completely off her rocker.

Mr. Norris and Filch - well, Filch used to be a Squib. Now he might very well be an Animagus, and so is [[GenderBender Mr. Norris.]]

Voldemort, who has always used others to get to his goals, now is unable to do anything but that. Also, he cannot, in canon, feel love, but now is able to be seduced by Ebony.

Hedwig... Goth nothing.

Due to the changes in the structure of the universe needed to make the events of the fic possible, the prophecy now doesn't limit the number of Chosen Ones.

Ebony becomes a Chosen One only during the course of the story.

How? Voldemort "marked her as his equal". Not with a scar or a bit of his soul, but by giving her a task he only trusts ''himself'' with otherwise - killing Harry Potter.

The story actually takes place after the final book. Ebony found the ring in the forest, which is why she can see characters who shouldn't be at Hogwarts in 2006. The only person remotely in-character was [=McGonagall,=] who was still there and very real.

Unfortunately, having such a powerful object drove Enoby insane. She's still in St. Mungo's, imagining all this happening.

[[WMG: The Ebony-horcrux fuck fantasy theory]]
WARNING: SUM OF DIS WMG IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VOIWER EXCRETION ADVISD
Okay, that lame joke out of the way, here's my thought: At some point circa 1991, after the death of Quirrell, Voldemort's spirit was off elsewhere, and briefly was in America for fear his near-return would cause enough attention for someone to try and track him down. While there, a bit of his soul flaked off, kinda like it did with Harry, and made its way into a newborn American squib child. Probable named Marilyn Susan.
When she was six years old, Harry Potter defeated Voldemort and the wizarding world was saved. Yay. Mary Sue heard many stories about his great accomplishments and the adventures of those around him, including Draco Malfoy, as the evilness of one last bit of Voldemort’s soul grew inside her.
In 2004, at the height of the emo craze, Voldemort’s bit of spirit unleashes a terrifying hidden potential inside the girl. She has no real idea how the hell magic functions (again, she’s a squib) but wields ridiculous power. And, having had her sexual awakening, she decides she wants to have a crazy goffic orgy. So wielding all that power, she renames herself “Ebony”, goes off to Hogwarts and tortures everyone there into playing her insane game of pretend. Including random oddities like making Hagrid play both Hargrid and “Sedric”. It’s no wonder everyone’s always slitting their wrists: they’re being tortured to partake in this sick game!
And, in a further ironic twist, the last piece of Voldemort’s soul is the OnlySaneMan who [[EvenEvilHasStandards has standards]] and has abandoned his plans on ruling the wizarding world to try and put an end to Ebony, trying to make amends for bringing that abomination into the world.

* Voldemort, also known as "Satan", is [[NamesTheSame Satan]]. He represents the angel who rebels from Dumbledore, the God figure. Draco and Ebony are Adam and Eve, who live in blissful harmony until Satan shows up to tempt them. Then they become aware of their sexuality and start banging all the time. The ForbiddenFruit in this case is the "amnesia potion" that Satan uses on Ebony to convince her to fall in love with him and do stuff together. Voldemort's insistence that Ebony kill Vampire represents Satan's role as TheCorrupter -- he needs Ebony to do the work so that he can [[YourSoulIsMine take possession of her soul]] (his threat to kill Draco shows that he's ''capable'' of doing it himself, but won't). He's already got Snap (''a.k.a.'' "Snoop" and "[[MeaningfulName Snake]]") to execute his orders for him.

She certainly ''tries'', but she's manifestly unsuccessful. A serious analysis of the Goth subculture in an American HighSchool will reveal that Goths are ''way'' down on the social ladder. While they're hardly the ''only'' high school clique that gets bullied, the difference between goffs and your ordinary {{Hollywood Nerd}}s is that goffs ''want'' to be down there; they don't aspire to move up in the pecking order and hold pretty much everyone else in total disdain.\\

[[WMG: Tara is actually a prep, and based Ebony on an annoying emo girl from school.]]

Tara is your average, well-adjusted teenage girl. She has basic tastes for someone of her time period. She likes Aeropostale, Hilary Duff, bright colors, and the Disney Channel. There is some evidence to suggest this. In one scene, Enoby favorably compares her and Draco's kiss to "A Cinderella Story" and at one point rattles off a list of prep stores. Also consider how stereotypical the goffs act and how obvious the references to goth culture are.

At school, Tara was bullied by the emo kids for being basic (preppy, in 2000s lingo). There was one annoying girl in particular who was obsessed with Gerard Way, Malfoy, and fan fiction. She and her friends thought they were better than everyone for shopping at Hot Topic and liking emo music.

Tara decided to go on fanficiton.net to get back at these goths. She and her friend Raven wrote a Harry Potter fanfic from the perspective of a strawman emo teen. Being preps, they didn't know the difference between goth and emo so they called the clearly emo teens gothic. People thought the authors were serious, and flamed them for their outrageous plot lines and bad grammar. Tara and Raven decided to give the people what they came for by making the gramerrrm progressively worse and the story crazier.

The reason Tara abandoned her account was not that she was driven off the internet, it was because her satire was complete. While we're on the subject of Tara's account, consider how stereotypical a name XXXBloodyrists666XXX is.

[[WMG: Tara Misspelled the names on purpose to avoid copyright infringement.]]

All right, we have to get this out of the way first -- Tara is who you think she is at first glance. She's not a MagnificentBastard {{Troll}}, nor is she an eternal wannabe emo-Goth. This may seem like it's missing the point of Wild Mass Guessing or otherwise being TheKilljoy, but there's actually something interesting to this when you think about it.\\

There's been a ''lot'' of digital ink spilled about this fanfic -- not just on [[Website/TVTropes This Very Wiki]], but elsewhere on the Internet. But why? What's so special about ''this'' fanfic? Well, it's entirely because it was written by an ordinary teenage girl. It's an insight into teenagers on the Internet in its halcyon days, before anyone had [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny seen that kind of thing before]], before the parade of imitators who lacked the earnest drive of the original. It was a bizarre, understated, perfect collision of two otherwise distinct worlds -- attention-seeking teenage girls, and intrepid Internet explorers.\\

Tara actually fits the profile of an "ordinary teenage girl" remarkably well. She's at the age where she starts to have a little bit of knowledge about the world, which as we all know is [[TooCleverByHalf a dangerous thing]]. She now technically knows about sex, drugs, and rock and roll-- erm, Goth music. She's discovering the hormones that will soon [[HormoneAddledTeenager consume her]]. And she's in desperate need of attention. So she decides she's going to prove that she knows just as much as everyone else, throwing all of her newfound knowledge of the world into this cool thing that people are doing on the Internet: FanFiction. Tara's contribution to the world of fanfic includes:
* A lot of sex, most of which is nonsensical, [[MakingLoveInAllTheWrongPlaces hideously unrestrained]], [[IkeaErotica awkwardly described]], and totally lacking in the human elements of a real relationship that someone who's actually ''been'' in one would identify as one of the things which makes sex stories so compelling.
* A lot of "serious issues" (one chapter is even dedicated to them) -- things like drugs, pedophilia, depression, and self-harm. Tara's probably not ''really'' depressed, but like many teenagers, she ''(a)'' wishes people would take her more seriously, ''(b)'' has just started learning about the complexity of the range of human emotions, including mental disorders, and ''(c)'' is prone to self-diagnosis. A lot of teenagers claim UsefulNotes/AspergersSyndrome; she claims depression. The fic is clearly designed for Tara to show her "smarts" (more on that a little later), as opposed to something she's using to ''actually'' work through mental health issues.
* A potpurri of all the things she likes -- obviously ''Franchise/HarryPotter'', goth culture, and all the bands she likes -- and also the things she [[PraisingShowsYouDontWatch thinks she should like]]. That's why you see random references to other works -- ''Film/BackToTheFuture'', ''Literature/TheLordOfTheRings'', ''Film/TheExorcist'', ''etc.'' -- which tend to prove that Tara hasn't actually read/seen/consumed any of them. Tara wants you to think she's "cultured" -- for a 13-year-old girl's definition of the term. You ''know'' you've met someone like this, if not ''been'' someone like this.[[note]]If you're in the "Tara must be a troll camp" and wondering why she would mention Tom Bombadil, who doesn't appear in the films and has no real bearing on the plot, remember that he shows up relatively early in the first book -- plausible for Tara to remember him if she tried to read ''The Lord of the Rings'' and gave up pretty quickly.[[/note]]
Tara wants to make you think she's [[WiseBeyondTheirYears Wise Beyond Her Years]]. But she doesn't want to spend ''too'' much effort doing that. This explains the [[RougeAnglesOfSatin horrendous spelling and grammar]]. It's not simply a matter of Tara not employing a spell-checker; she ''disdains'' proper spelling and grammar, thinking that ''(a)'' she knows better than all those teachers who are insisting on what she sees as the arbitrary rules of the English language, and ''(b)'' it makes her look [[XtremeKoolLetterz cool and edgy]]. Observe her use of "da" for "the", "dis" for "this", "c" for "see", or "ur" for "you're". Some spelling mistakes are deliberate -- and others are not. It's part of the fic's mystique; the reader is looking at it and thinking, "who thinks this is ''cool''"? ''My Immortal'' being one of the earliest fics of this genre, it fascinated the mid-2000s Internet crowd -- in an era without much in the way of algorithms and suggestions, when everyone was an amateur, and when if you wanted to find something remotely worth consuming, you had to surf Website/{{Newgrounds}}, Website/{{YTMND}}, a nascent Website/YouTube -- or Website/FanFictionDotNet.\\

This is important to grasp: the fic is not ''enjoyable'' to read. It's actually quite frustrating to see someone who thinks this level of illiteracy, shallowness, and fake drama is actually ''cool''. Like most things SoBadItsGood, the character ''behind'' the story is more interesting than the story itself. And the readers wanted to find out more about the character. So they provoked her, and prodded her, and flamed the story. And Tara, who just wanted to enjoy herself, wasn't enjoying the negative reviews. She wanted to write the fic ''her'' way, and she lashed out at her reviewers. This is why the spelling gets ''worse'' as it goes on -- Tara resented being told that her way of doing things was wrong and doubled down on it. She similarly booted her friend Raven off of proofreading duty.\\

Like most girls that age, Tara grew up. Nowadays, the fic is a massive OldShame. She has no reason to talk about it, nor to even reveal her identity. She's a grown woman now -- and she's had time to learn about how little she knew when she wrote the fic. It's what we all go through -- no matter how smart you were as a kid, not only do you know very little, you can't even ''grasp'' how little you know. Best case scenario, you were [[Franchise/HarryPotter Hermione]]. And Tara was no Hermione. Most teenagers weren't.\\

And to a big degree, that's ''why'' this fanfic struck so many chords. Many people on the Internet are hopelessly nerdy -- places like TV Tropes wouldn't exist without that mentality. Many people, on this site and off it, know deep down how dangerously close ''they'' were to writing a fanfic like this. Many have had sexual fantasies about fictional characters. Many have thought enthusiastically at the Internet's publishing platform, where they could open their hearts and be seen for the brilliant souls they are. Many have found themselves unable to resist dropping references to their favorite things, even when it wouldn't be appropriate. Many have failed to see the point of spelling and grammar. Many of the Internet people won't admit it, but they know deep down, they're not so different. And "Tara Gilesbe" was simply the one who went just a little bit farther than everyone else. So the Internet decided to pile on her to disguise their own insecurity. And in the echo chamber that is the Internet, ''My Immortal'' [[MemeticMutation mutated]] into the gold standard of "product of obnoxious Internet personality", serving as a teaching moment.\\

With that out of the way, let's have some ''fun:''\\

!!Who is Tara, exactly?

[[WMG: Tara was an extremely drunk and high Music/MarilynManson.]]
During the time frame of the fanfiction's creation, his marriage was imploding -- that's likely to have a negative effect on one's psyche. He was also supposedly working on a new album, which would be finished but never released. Said album was part of the "Celebritarian" art movement, a sarcastic critique of American media culture and celebrity worship. The only song that is suspected of surviving its shelving, "Mutilation Is the Most Sincere Form of Flattery", is a missive against pretty much everything Tara likes.\\
\\
Around this time, his marriage finally implodes;[[note]]Take note, kids: never marry a stripper! (Okay, fine, burlesque dancer.)[[/note]] he starts dating Creator/EvanRachelWood, then a 19-year-old moron; and he ups his intake of drugs and absinthe. For a while, he goes completely insane, and he hammers out ''My Immortal'', a fanfiction in the vein of the album he had been working on.\\
\\
There are some signs of Manson's authorship, if you know where to look. The constant "preps v. goffs" theme mirrors the music video for "The Fight Song", which is an UsefulNotes/AmericanFootball game between jocks and goths. "Tara" also drops some pretty obscure pop-culture references, historical or philosophical icons, and correctly spelled (albeit misplaced) big words like "eructation" and "Azerbaijan", interspersed with Manson's drug-addled attempt to mimic the writing style of the braindead teenagers he so despises. And Manson was known to have episodes of writing a whole lot of nonsense -- when he broke up with Rachel-Wood, he had a genuine psychotic break in which he [[RoomFullOfCrazy vandalized his mansion with incoherent writing on the walls]].\\
\\
"Raven" may not exist, she may be Rachel-Wood, or she may be Madonna Wayne Gacy (his legitimately schizophrenic keyboardist and best friend at the time) trying to keep a handle on the situation. If "Raven" is Gacy, that might explain who published it.

[[WMG: Tara is Creator/JKRowling.]]
She secretly has a poor opinion of her [[FanDumb admittedly insane]] fans, and she wanted to {{troll}} the heck out of them. She was particularly disgusted with what she was seeing on Website/FanfictionDotNet -- {{Mary Sue}}s, CharacterDerailment, [[WeAllLiveInAmerica Americanizations]]. She decided that she could not only write that kind of story and get more reviews than anyone in her fandom, she could do it with ''worse'' spelling, grammar, and characterization. It explains how "Tara" guesses some of the plot elements of the last book -- she ''wrote'' it. It also allows her to pretend she's only seen the movies but reference elements that only appear in the books.\\
\\
Her knowledge of Tara's favorite music is uneven, to say the least. Yes, some of the songs mentioned in the fic, like "Demolition Lovers", are pretty damn obscure. On the other hand, if she knew anything about the genre, she'd know that Music/GreenDay is not as "emo" as people think. She probably skimmed her fans' profiles on FF.net and did some cursory research on Website/{{Wikipedia}} -- enough to pick up the name of a song and learn that a store called Hot Topic is popular among wannabe-emo kids, but not enough to pass for a legit fan. It's eerily reminiscent of her canonical "generic rock star" description of Bill Weasley.\\
\\

Unbeknownst to Ebony, and indeed to everyone else in the story except Dumblydore, everything Snap has done so far is a ploy to gain Voldemort's trust as part of an overarching plan to defeat him. Among the direct hints at this are that the character discover that he's a genuine goff, and he lets Ebony and Draco off the hook for screwing in the forest (which, in some demented way addressed elsewhere on the page, is part of the plan).\\

* Lucius "Luscious" Malfoy. His animagus form is a ferret. And one shudders to think how he feels about ferrts.

She came to Earth in an attempt to conquer it. Just being around her causes people to go insane and become hopelessly attracted to her or want to follow her and become her clone. Prepz are people who can somewhat resist her, they still go insane and often turn evil, just not as perfect clones of her. The only hope for the version of the Potterverse that she resides in is for [[Series/DoctorWho the Doctor]] to come and save the day.

And that's how she can "talk in silence". However, it is Goffik Sign Language and can only be understood by other Goffs. Perhaps it is by knowing and being fluent in Goffik Sin Language (geddit) that one can become Goffik when they were not before, and how a Goff can sort out the Posers from the real Goffs.

[[WMG: Voldemort really is [[Creator/JRRTolkien Tom Bombadil]]]]

[[WMG: There are actually more than just preps/posers and goffs]]

At least two refferences to punks exist, so maybe the goffs and the punks are common allies against the preps/posers. What happened to the punks is anybody's guess.

The reason he shows interest in both goff and prep things is because he's trying to prove a point that people don't have to fit into the prep/goff binary--They can be whoever they want.

[[WMG: Voldemort keeps flying away because he wants to mess around.]]
He does his random threats and stuff; but he's already put the characters into a secret hell, and they're suffering already.
* That would require him finding out that there are [[FateWorseThanDeath worse things than death]]. NoodleIncident?
* Nope,he figured that one out after 2 minutes in Ebony's presence
* Voldemort created Ebony, to torture the Wizarding World before he kills them all.

He's trying to stop Ebony from poisoning fanon, but he has underestimated her.

He's also the most powerful character. Voldemort never seems to kill anyone despite threatening to do so, and only becomes dangerous in Chapter 44 when he summons Navel's wand. Presumably he requires a wand to summon Navel's wand, and the only reason he doesn't use his own wand to kill everyone is, Navel is the owner of the Elder Wand, and wields the most power over everyone. To prevent Navel from defeating him he steals the Elder wand from Navel. Voldemort's own wand probably is rather ineffective. Since in canon, Navel was one of the possibly contenders for Voldemort's defeat this is likely. As Navel is now a goff, making him the true hero is conforming to Tara's principles.

Aside from Hagrid being a Hogwarts student, able to use a wand, and not, from what we can tell by the story, actually half-Giant or bearded, as well as his name always being spelled as "Hargrid", it's likely he's a different character, another OC based off of a friend that she just forgot to mention in an author's note.

[[WMG: Related to the above: Hargrid is meant to be Cedric and Hedwig is meant to be Hagrid.]]
Tara herself says that Hargrid was a mistake and it was supposed to be Cedric at one point (but then calls him Hargrid in later chapters anyway). About Hedwig - well, it makes sense and fits her other mistakes.
* This makes sense considering that Hagrid and Tom Riddle/ Voldemort did go to Hogwarts in the same period. Maybe Tara interpreted Tom Riddle's framing of Hagrid as a revenge for having had his heart broken by him.

[[WMG: Vlodemort/volxemort/Tom Bombodil is actually a time lord.]]
When Ebony returns to the past, Tom "satan" Bombodil seems to function exactly like a time lord. He knows things that will happen in the future as if he has been there I.E. travelled in time. In the last chapter, it says Satan transformed into Voldemort, which sounds like a regeneration.
So my theory about this is that Tom's TARDIS broke in the 80's and he somehow died. Then he regenerated into Voldemort(the guy with no nose). Wanting to have a time machine, he manipulated several people within a grand scheme to get a new one. When he saw Ebony, he knew the girl would be stupid and self-absorbed enough to use in this plan. In the normal timeline she was but a minor human student who wasnt noticed, but Voldemort made changes to the timeline which made Ebony a vampire with the ability to seduce everyone she wanted. Then he posed himself as an evil person, so Ebony would go back in time to prevent his 'start of darkness'. After that, his former self would manipulate Ebony into taking him to the future. After that, he would kill Ebony(for her existence would now be useless and actually dangerous, since her vampire powers where a match for his Time lord powers) and rebuild Ebony's time machine into a TARDIS and use it to take over the universe. [[TimeyWimeyBall Because time went all wimey wibbly wobbly]], he regenerated before he was shot with 'abra kedabra', during the final chapter. The story stopped at the last 'abra kedabra' because Voldemort had killed her after that. (probably by holding a barbeque with lots of steak)
To add a more confusing variation to this timey wimey theory, Morti [=Mcfly=] is a future regeneration of Voldemort. Both Share 'Mort' in their names. He brought Ebony a TARDIS to give to his past self. He had to give it indirectly since [[NeverTheSelvesShallMeet the selves shall never meet]].

The reason why this plan was not very evident in the story itself, was because it was written from the POV of Ebony, who is actually chosen to be the centerfold of this plan because of her stupidness, which is not a very reliable point of view.
* Alternatively, he's a Time Traveling Con Man, possibly even Jack, with an as-of-yet unknown motive. Remember how Dumbledore looks completely different in the 80s? Maybe it wasn't actually him. It may have been Tom Satan Bombadil Anderson's partner in crime. Ebony may never have even traveled to the 80s at all, which would explain the numerous mistakes about people attending Hogwarts in the 80s when they shouldn't, and about the 80s in general.

[[WMG: The 'Severus' in chapter 30 is a manifestation of Snap's surpressed good side.]]
In chapter 30 Snap is torturing the main characters. But suddenly Severus appeared. This character didnt do anything but distract Snap, so the real help could come in. So it could be that his good 'goffic' side manifestated itself to stop Snap from harming goffs.

[[WMG: Tara never misspelled any of the names. Those are all different characters.]]
It would explain various characters surviving death, and/or slashing their wrists all the time and drinking the blood.
* Think about it; the same misspellings (Enoby, Dumblydore, Volsemort, etc.) keep reappearing throughout the story. Can it be mere coincidence?
* Since other characters often refer to the main character as Enoby, Evony, etc., this would imply that all those names (Enoy, Ibony, etc.) refer to Ebony's identical, or at least very similar, sisters and that other characters keep mistaking her for them. It's possible that all Ebony's sisters died before the story began (Hey, that would give her an actual reason to be depressed).

[[WMG: Slutborn is Ebony's son.]]
Think about it. The Prof. is (apparently) GOFF (Saying "oh my goff" in the later chapters), and is at least once called "Slutborn." SLUT. BORN. And who is a goth ''and'' a slut? Everybody, but Ebony is the star! Plus, she is the only one (besides Voldemort). She's had sex so many times and never seems to use protection. (Lupin asked her for condoms, but she never indicated she had any). Perhaps she gave birth in the past and (since Tara does not want children) abandoned him so he can have a tragic background. Who his father is could be anyone's guess, considering she's slept with Vampire, Draco and [[spoiler: Voldemort]].
* That...kind of makes sense.
** Also, nearly died laughing with that theory, great job.
* Probably Voxymort.
* He could be the son of Jezebel from ''FanFic/{{Imma Wiserd}}''. (her last name is SLutborn)

[[WMG: Filch and Mrs. Norris are anamangi.]]
In My Immortal, Filch (a human in Harry Potter canon) is a cat, and Mrs. Norris (a cat in Harry Potter) is a human. This at first may seem like Tara's mistake, but in reality, both Filch and Mrs. Norris are human and are both anamangus who can turn into cats at will. During the time of My Immortal, they each simpily changed from the forms we know them as.
* But Filch is a Squib, so how can he be an Animagus?
** J.K. Rowling's version isn't as funny.
** Because J.K. Rowling was the one who misspelled it! Filch is not a Squib, but a ''Squid''!

[[WMG: Slutborn, Loopin and Sirius are [=OCs=].]]
They're not supposed to be Slughorn, Lupin or Sirius. Tara made them up. That would explain why there's never any mention of Lupin's transformations or Sirius being Vampire's godfather. Also, this fanfic is too shitty to be made by a seventeen-years-old girl(which Tara claims to be). Tara wrote the fanfic before the second book came out. She sent it to J.K. Rowling, who got quite a laugh. She then decided to name some of her characters names resembling Tara's. It would also explain the "Tara is Gilderoy Lockhart"-theory above.
** {{Jossed}}. "Serius" is reffered as Vampyre's "dogfather".

[[WMG: Marty [=McFly=] works for Dumbledore.]]
After the plan to stop the Dark Lord is set in motion, Ebony keeps running into Marty or his "tim" machine for no directly stated reason. Ebony doesn't have any way of traveling on her own between the past and the present except by dying, which Professor Sinister and the others would probably view as too dangerous to rely on. Dumbelydum, therefore, sends Marty -- with his own means of time travel -- to shadow her in the past and help her return to the present if things go wrong. Marty disguises his time machine as an iPod and plants it on Ebony, so that she could use it to escape from Past!Dumbledore near the story's end. He's also responsible for Ebony falling through the hole and appearing back in the present after her first time travel session. Depending on the nature of Marty's employment, he and Doc might even have been among the people sent to London to find Serious and Lucian.\\

He was crying when he thought Draco had died. Not two chapters later does he openly mock Draco. It is possible he knew what happened to Draco and wanted Enoby to find him on her own (and this does, in fact, get them back together.) Judjing by some of the above guesses about his inconsistent behavior, this is kind of likely.

Sinister's speech about him not being evil because he found love meant that, should someone have sex with him, he would lose his powers/die/get amnesia/whatever. Of course they send Ebony, ''because she's the sluttiest student in school.'' It would be so easy.

That's why Enoby never heard of it. He probably gave pamphlets or something to Dumbledore so he could advertize to the goffs. But alas, he is young as DistractedByTheSexy, and he goes out of business giving Ebony free clothes. That's why him and the shop fade out of the story.

[[WMG: In Fanfic/MyImmortal continuity, Hedwig...]]
Is a ModeLocked, [[GenderBender Gender Bended]] animagus, possibly as a punishment (maybe for being an unregistered animagus).

If "vloxemortserum" is a terrible misspelling of veritaserum, the most powerful truth potion, then it would make sense for a seer to take it so much that they became addicted to it. That is, if it enabled someone to speak truths that they did not know, it would be the perfect tool for prophecy. Makes her addiction to it a form of Fridge Brilliance, really.

[[WMG: "Severus," who rescues everyone from "Snap" at the end of chapter 30 is Snape's abusive muggle father.]]
Because it makes more sense than the original story does.
* Wait, typed that backwards. Snap is Severus' father according to this theory.

[[WMG: Draco is a Star Trek fan]]
In one of the later chapters Draco supposedly "put his spock in [Ebony's] you-know-what". Since there is so such body part as a spock, perhaps Draco owns a Spock action figure and used that to penetrate Enoby? Either that or Draco named his penis Spock after the character...

Which means that unknown to Ebony and possibly everyone else in the story except Dumbleydore, everything he's done so far is a ploy to gain Voldemort's trust and execute some master plan to get rid of him. The few direct hints at this that we get is his letting Ebony and Draco off the hook for screwing in the forest, and his past self being goffik.

Hey, Rowling played the same plot twist with the same character twice in the actual series. Why can't Tara do it once?

[[WMG: Wormtail became Snaketail because it's more goff that way]]

[[WMG: Tara is not a goff. Goffs are only a symbol for the downtrodden.]]
It reads so much like a typical American high school novel, except the goffs and violence. Since Tara mentions emo rather than goff bands and makes blunders (saying The Nightmare before Christmas is goffik) she probably googled some bands that put on black and white makeup and labelled them as goff. But why use goffs against the preps then? Angered by bullying from preps at school, Tara retaliates by writing an escapist fic where the dorks rule. But she couldn't just make them dorks or ordinary kids, that would be lame. Why not make them goffs and Satanists instead? she reasoned, and thus My Immortal was born. It's all an allegory for social dynamics really. Besides, at her age she couldn't make the downtrodden resemble real sympathetic characters, so she made them into goffs so readers could identify the rival factions more easily.
* Having an alternate ideology makes you look cool and profound.

[[WMG: The veil will bring Serious to the [[spoiler: VideoGame/KidIcarus universe]]]]
Where he will live up to his nickname.

While the origins were the same, Lupin left them early on. Searching a new purpose, they became an all-Animagus band.

The members:

James "Samaro" Potter, who figured as a nickname this was a bit more inconspicuous than "Prongs".

Sirius "Serious" Black, ditto.

Severus Snape, nicknamed "Snake" because his Animagus form is... a snake.

Lucius Malfoy, nicknamed "Luscious" because... well... because... uh... they think ferrets are sexy?

Hedwig, whose Animagus form is an owl. He later accompanies Harry as a pet, similar to Scabbers with Ron in the original canon.

Also, the Potters' secret keeper was either Snape or Hedwig (explaining the need for the latter to stay hidden as an owl.)

Wormtail was kicked from the Marauders/band because he couldn't sing.

[[WMG: "Brittany" is Luna Lovegood]]
Enoby always wanted a blonde enemy called Brittany so she just started calling her that. And Luna went along with it because, well, she's Luna.

[[WMG: Loopin has vorarephilia]]
In My Immortal, Loopin has demonstrated (or is accused of) several sexual deviancies, including [[PedoHunt pedophilia]], [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], [[MakingLoveInAllTheWrongPlaces exhibitionism]] and [[ThePeepingTom voyeurism]]. In [[Literature/HarryPotter canon]], he is a werewolf.
For this reason, he [[RougeAnglesOfSatin masticated]] to bathing Ebony.

[[WMG: Willow and Draco are both ghosts]]
At least, they turned into them after their apparent deaths. Everyone has been wondering how Draco and Willow both just showed up alive in the next chapters, and this is why. Hogwarts has ghosts, and even though they don't show up in the fanfic, it's not completely unreasonable to say that, in the story's canon, there are none.

This is why nobody was surprised to see both of them alive right after they were said to have died.

This is also why she suddenly decided she liked Willow again- as a Sadistic Satanist Slytherin Vampire Goff, Ebony likes death. And thus, when Willow appeared as a ghost, she thought it was awesome, and decided to be her friend again.

As for how she and Draco could still have sex, well, it's My Immortal. Everyone and everything seems capable of sex.

Since they don’t have orange hair unlike the other Weasleys, they must be adopted by them. Makes sense, no?

[[WMG: Dumbledore is Draco’s sire]]
In one chapter, Draco refers Dumbledore as his sire. Maybe Dumbledore is a secret vampire who turned Draco into one. We guess that siring (aka turning a mortal into a vampire) may actually exist in the My Immortal-verse after all.

[[WMG: Voldemort is a dog]]

No, really.

Think about it: people call him the Bark Lord, the "Crookshanks" spell made him fall off his broom...

He ''is'' described as a person, but he could be an Animagus.

[[WMG: The preps are a rebellion against the goffs.]]
Originally, Hogwarts was like any other school where the students had a variety of different fashion styles and interests. Then the "goff" subculture started to form when emo music became popular. As seen in the story, the "goffs" are pretty off the wall, running around the school naked, shouting profanities at the drop of a hat, and casually cutting. The other students tried to distance themselves from the goffs as such as possible. They adopted a lifestyle that was the opposite of goff in every way. They dressed in bright colors, admire Hilary Duff and Ashlee Simpson, and have a positive attitude.

[[WMG: "Preps" aren't an actual group, Enoby just calls everyone she doesn't like preppy.]]

Ebony implies that there's two rival groups at school--the preps and the goffs. However, the preps don't show any evidence that they see themselves as a group. In fact, preps as a group probably don't exist. The preps are just regular people that the goffs put a label on. Furthermore, these students don't have a rivalry with the goffs. They only disapprove of them for acting insane, not because of the music or fashion interests.

[=NaNoWriMo=] is an Internet challenge in which you write a 50,000 word story in a single month. The whole point of [=NaNoWriMo=] is literary abandon -- write now, fix later. The author of ''My Immortal'' participated in [=NaNoWriMo=] in this way to [[TheBet win a bet]].

In keeping with [=NaNoWriMo=]'s ethos, "Tara" just hammered out whatever was in her head to work as fast as possible, without going back to proofread (as they say, editing is for the following month). In the early chapters, it's actually not ''too'' bad. But once the story picked up a cult following and people started commenting on the terrible spelling and grammar, "Tara" decided to turn it up to eleven. [=NaNoWriMo=] also explains the lack of continuity (it's all WritingByTheSeatOfYourPants), as well as the random plot twists and pop-culture references -- [=NaNo=] encourages these, calling them "plot bunnies". In sum, the whole thing is the product of a process that encourages writing down as many words as possible, as fast as possible, with no other consideration.

[[WMG: ''My Immortal'' is an advanced sociological study in socialist revolutions.]]
The dynamic between the preps and the goffs is really an analysis of the dynamic between the bourgeoisie and the proletariat. The preps, drawing from the canonical Gryffindors -- clever, successful, and popular -- are the self-absorbed elites, and the goffs are the downtrodden, creative misfits who foment the coming revolution. ''My Immortal'' turns ''Harry Potter'' on its head -- rather than the heroic Gryffindors taking down Voldemort, it's the goffic Slytherins.\\
\\

[[WMG: Tara is a muggle who stumbled across Hogwarts.]]
She WentMadFromTheRevelation and tried to inform the muggle world of what she saw. Unfortunately, the first place she staggered into was a HotTopic store, which greatly skewed her memories of the place. She also suffered a head injury on her way back home, which led to the odd grammar.
* In one of the Harry Potter books, it is mentioned that Hogwarts is guarded by spells so that muggles don't see Hogwarts where it should be; they just see a junk yard with over 9000 "keep out" signs.

[[WMG: The "hacker" is Tara, possibly acting out of boredom.]]
Turns out it's a troll fic after all, and after 38 chapters of writing essentially the same ridiculous thing over and over again, the author decides to take a different approach for a bit. Could explain why the hacker only wrote one chapter, and then uploaded two of Tara's originals; why not do more damage than that?
* This theory is already listed near the top of the page.

Think about it. She's Tara's second avatar. She hates herself and created Britney to punish the good side of her she always hated. "Britney" is just a normal, unremarkable girl, what Tara probably is in real life. She (Tara) bundled her up with everything she hates to justify her punishment.

[[WMG:[=XXXmidnitegoffXXX=] really is Tara.]]
[=XXXmidnitegoffXXX=] writes intentional badfics and did one of the "fake" ''My Immortal'' sequels, but is listed by Tara as one of her favorite authors. Doesn't it seem somewhat plausible that the same person ran both accounts?
** [=XXXmidnitegoffXXX=] confessed to having written Fanfic/MyImmortal recently. [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7440545/1/My_Immortal_The_Truth Here's what he has to say.]]



[[WMG: Tara's Account Got Hacked by Several Trolls Before the Chapter 39 Hack]]
It makes perfect sense. Some troll was looking for something to hijack. He picks a random one, and chooses My Immortal. Then another one comes along, and another, and another and so on and so forth, until we finally have the awfulness we have here. Each person hacking it didn't realize somebody hacked it before them. This would explain the changes in styles from chapter to chapter.


[[WMG: Tara is a [[{{GIRL}} Guy In Real Life]]]]
The bizarre lines like as referenced in [[Characters/MyImmortal the characters page]], with "he put his boy's thingy in mine" or "he put his throbbing you-know-what in my tool" or "my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I'm a girl so I didn't get one you sicko" suggests something odd. "Tara" really can't be that bad in writing a fan fiction, and the whole thing is an elaborate plot pulled by a troll. Eventually, the troll, realizing the prank had gone on long enough, slipped away.
* Uh, you have noticed the theory that this is a TrollFic is brought up a lot, right? Tara could be male if "she" were a troll, but that doesn't mean "she" is either.
** Another WMG was mostly about Tara being a [[{{GIRL}} Guy In Real Life]] than a troller.
*** We've got alot of those theories too, man you are way behind on your theories.
* For what it's worth, There's a plug of the entire text of ''My Immortal'' into [[http://www.hackerfactor.com/GenderGuesser.php Gender Guesser]] and it thinks the author is female.

[[WMG: A third individual was in on the story.]]
The person who posted the fic on the blog page after fanfiction.net took it down is skilled in the English language, moreso than either Tara or her co-writer Raven. Also, this person refers to both of them in the third person, while referring to him or herself in the first person. Furthermore, this person seems to be aware of which parts of the story were co-written by "Raven" and which parts were not, suggesting familiarity with the creation of the story.
* Except being good at English and talking in the first person are not uncommon, and Raven's help is common knowledge.

[[WMG: Tara is [[Franchise/CthulhuMythos Nyarlathotep]].]]
"She" wrote ''Fanfic/MyImmortal'' to screw with human beings and [[ForTheEvulz entertain herself]]. Goes well with the fic being a BrownNote.
* Actually, "The Pokemon Story" fits Nyarlathotep's character. Tara could be one of his worshippers.
* Ffinished reading it to chapter 25 and haven't had any prob-'' '''[[MadnessMantra SHUB-NIGGURATH!]]''' [[MindRape O black goat of the woods with a thousand young!]]''
** If this is true, there is [[OffTheRails only one thing that we can do]]. It involves [[NoodleImplements lawn gnomes, shotguns, Molotov Cocktails, a tanker truck, a yacht, a helicopter, varied weaponry, a speaker set, an ice rink, a zamboni, LOTS of C-4, and an Internet]]. We shall fight the [[Fanfic/MyImmortal insanity]] by being [[CrazyIsCool more insane than it ever could comprehend]]. Tara thinks that we are beneath her notice. [[LovecraftLite We shall show her how much she is wrong]], in a glorious incident involving the above materials and [[Film/PacificRim giant robots]]. We are the Internet, and we are as inexplicable as she. And we will continue to call her Tara, because [[TheUnpronounceable Nyarlathotep is unpronounceable]].

[[WMG: Tara is [[LightNovel/HaruhiSuzumiya Haruhi]].]]
We know what happens when Haruhi makes a movie: it's disjointed, poorly edited, and has no coherent plot. What would happen if she were to write a piece of Harry Potter fanfiction? It would look a lot like ''Fanfic/MyImmortal''. The "goffick" bits come from Haruhi having some contact with the ElegantGothicLolita community and thinking it was so {{moe}}.
** Don't you mean [[Manga/OuranHighSchoolHostClub Renge?]]

[[WMG: Tara is an advertiser for a clothing store competing against Hot Topic]]
The whole fic is an elaborate mudslinging campaign agaist Hot Topic, designed to make people think their customers are stupid, shallow, and horrendous at spelling and writing in general.

[[WMG: "Tara" is an [[CoolPlane A-10 Thunderbolt.]]]]

She's not human at all -- she's a fighter jet. "Tara Gilesbie" is actually the pilot's daughter, a twelve-year-old Potterhead whose music tastes include Music/MarilynManson, Music/MyChemicalRomance, and Music/GoodCharlotte. Airman Gilespie had a poor understanding of his daughter's interests, and he did an even poorer job explaining them to his comrades, but this is what the aircraft overheard, and based on this warped perception, it wrote ''My Immortal''.\\

The aircraft knows little about the Potterverse, but it does know a lot about guns, flying, and warfare, and this is reflected in the story. It's why the story has such a fascination with guns, which normally don't exist in the Potterverse, and which appear capable of holding [[MoreDakka a gazillion bullets]] that [[FiveRoundsRapid can be sprayed rapidly]] -- the aircraft projected its [[{{BFG}} GAU-8 Avenger]] into the story. It also subconsciously found ways to project flying things into the fic, such as Draco's flying car and the broomsticks [=TaEnony=] and Draako [[AssPull pull out of their asses]] to flee Volxemprxt's lair. The sex scenes are actually referring to refueling, which the aircraft clearly enjoys -- especially when it happens in midair, which is pretty cool.\\

The characterization comes from the aircraft's limited understanding of its pilot's family and comrades. Ebony's depression mirrors the real Tara's -- her dad was half a world away and might never come back. She might have had bipolar disorder, and her dad would probably have worried a lot about how that would affect her perception of his deployment. "Raven", meanwhile, was someone deployed with Airman Gilespie, possibly even a superior officer, with whom the pilot had a falling out.\\

Simple.

Just take a look at their writing styles. OK, Cori's grammar and spelling are way better than Tara's, but apart from that, they both have similar styles.

[[WMG: ''My Immortal'' was written by either Megami33 or [=KrisRix=]. Maybe both.]]
Tara comes off as a sort of proto-Abridged!Raye from WebVideo/SailorMoonAbridged. She hasn't perfected the NoIndoorVoice yet, but is taking steps towards "MUST! PRAY! TO! SATAAAAN!" and has perfected the love of pain and violence. Come to think of it, Ebony's black, waist length hair (which Sailor Mars/Hino Rei/Raye has in canon) is tinted with purple and red- the colors of Sailor Mars' fuku.

[[WMG: Tara is ''K''ara of the ''Series/{{Star Trek|The Original Series}}'' episode "[[Recap/StarTrekS3E1SpocksBrain Spock's Brain]]".]]
The woman who gave us the immortal line "Brain and brain, what is brain?!" is certainly dumb enough to write this and the names are ''so'' close. And we know she spells her name wrong, so maybe every time she wrote "Tara" she meant to say "Kara". Kara has seen the ''Harry Potter'' films because the Eymorg [[AliensStealCable picked up TV broadcasts of them]]. The signal forms of the first four movies have only just reached Sigma Draconis VI by 2268, which is why Kara thinks the fifth movie is about to come out. "Raven" is the name of the person whose brain formed the original Controller. Exposure to ''My Immortal'' was what caused the original Controller to be "finished". When Kara absorbed knowledge from the Teacher to get Spock's brain, she happened to be logged into her fanfiction account. After retrieving the brain, she went to her computer, didn't think the story could be hers because she remembered that story being brilliant, concluded that she must have hacked into some idiot's account, and wrote the hacker chapter. After the knowledge faded from her brain, she went back to her account and, not remembering she had written the hacker chapter, continued writing as normal. ''My Immortal'' ended shortly thereafter when Captain Kirk forced them to abandon the Eymorg complex.

[[WMG: Tara is actually Lil' J, a.k.a. LILSHOWSTOPPA from the infamous youtube video "ME TELLIN YOU MOTHA FUCKERS OFF"]]
~aye_amber: You know, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTosQerWBzU THIS video?]] Come on. Think about it. The demeanor just... fits, what with the horrible vocabulary and strong tendency to curse out and threaten those who criticize her. This was what Tara was like in real life; she was a white "gangstuh" (I wont use the word "wigger" because the MoralGuardians will get on to me). However, unbeknownst to those around her, Tara actually had a secret desire: a desire to be goffik. But sadly, do to the cruel world we live in, she had no doubt that she would've lost all her "gangstuh" friends if she all of a sudden became a goff and revealed her love for MCR, GC, ''Evanescence,'' and the like. The only person she knew in the same situation was Jenny (a.k.a. Raven), who she would have secret Gerard Way worshipping parties with. One day though, she came up with a brilliant idea: Write a fanfic for [[Franchise/HarryPotter her favorite book/film series]] that would feature a goffik protaganist who would also be her [[AuthorAvatar Author Avatar/Surrogate]], and employ [[strike: Jenny]] "Raven" as the "editor" of said fanfic. Little did Tara know just how [[strike: [[GoneHorriblyWrong horribly wrong]]]] [[GoneHorriblyRight horribly right]] [[SoBadItsGood things would go....]] Also, LILSHOWSTOPPA posted her video in Feb 2007, at which point in time ''My Immortal'' was still being published and, funnily enough, both Tara and LILSHOWSTOPPA stopped (verifiably) updating around the same time. Maybe Tara gave up on the internet after the second hacking locked her out of her FF account? For further proof, I present this line as evidence:

--->"Then swooped he [Hargrid] in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent."

** Alternatively, Tara and LILSHOWSTOPPA are ''the same'' '''''troll'''''.

[[WMG: Tara's account was really a prank run by someone on Fanfiction.net staff.]]
Someone working for Website/FanfictionDotNet was tired of reading through all the bad SlashFic, RougeAnglesOfSatin, [[StrawNihilist emo wannabes]], and endless {{Lemon}}s. They decided to write a StealthParody to beat the badfic authors at their own game. There's some evidence that ''My Immortal'' had some protection of some sort -- ''My Immortal'' survived the huge number of reports it got, but its many imitators were zapped on site. The hacked chapter, with its reference to "Fanfiction.net Hell", was even a dig at all the deleted imitators. But in the end, [=FF.net=] realized [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone what they unleashed upon the world]] and did a large-scale purge of ''My Immortal'' and everything like it.

* Tara is actually a brilliant author who wrote a {{Fanfic}} that was the epitome of SugarWiki/SoCoolItsAwesome. Her editor hijacked the brilliant fanfic and turned it into the parody we're reading now. For some reason.

[[WMG: Tara is somehow related to CWC, creator of Webcomic/{{Sonichu}}]]
* The similarities are... uncanny.
** Or its written by the man himself. He takes a female identity [[ArmouredClosetGay to hide the fact he's gay or bi.]] Likely bi, because Tara fancies girls. Ebony is one of the biggest Mary Sues in the universe, but not a PuritySue. At the same time, Chris has an AuthorAvatar who reeks in Mary Sueness, [[DesignatedHero but at the same time]] is a [[ItsAllAboutMe self-centered egotist]] [[DisproportionateRetribution who'll kill you even if wronged a little.]] Clearly, Chris found a Twilight book, tried his hand in writing it, [[SoBadItsGood and failed hilariously.]] If this is true, it means:
*** a) Chris is the biggest, most dedicated troll on Earth, and everyone is in on it.
*** b) Chris has a range of talent, from SoBadItsGood to BileFascination. He's just really, ''really'' bad at writing Sonic and Pokemon fanfics.
*** c) Chris miracolously managed to write something SoBadItsGood, instead of his usual trash.
*** d) Chris created Tara as one of his dream girls/future wives (he creates this type of character a lot) and My Immortal is a story within a story inside Sonichu, created to needlessly pad out Tara's character.
*** e) SoBadItsGood is an evolved form of BileFascination. After all, Sonichu is so awful you can't help but look away. Fanfic/MyImmortal is so bad, it forces you to enjoy it.
* The troll who hacked My Immortal is Clyde Cash, evil overlord of the internet and Chris's sworn enemy.

[[WMG: Tara's gotten saner.]]
* Seriously. [[http://twitter.com/#!/XxXgoffikgurlXx Just check her Twitter.]] She even insists that the story was a satire.
** She also refers to Tara in the third person when she says that. Hence, your theory is either inverted and only her grammar has improved with the rest of her mind spiraling into multiple personality madness, or that isn't her.
*** Doesn't prove anything; this would hardly be the first time someone on the internets has pretended to be Tara/know her IRL.

[[WMG: Tara is a JustForFun/TimeLord]]
* Well, why not?

* ...as any fule kno.

* She had some kind of condition which affected her ability to read and write, and she was bullied in school because of it. So she turned away from the world and went "goffik", with Raven being one of her only friends. Eventually, after she and Raven had the fight, she felt even more alone. The depression spiraled until she was DrivenToSuicide.
** Not likely -- don't forget that she and Raven made up by chapter 30 or so.

[[WMG: Tara comes from a conservative/religious family.]]
Ergo, her gothic/satanist fantasy is one by-product of family drama that virtually always accompanies a growing, rebellious teenager.

[[WMG: Two guys trolled us.]]
[[http://ohinternet.com/My_Immortal/TheBatMan%27s_confession Here's the confession in all its glory]].
* Well, if this is true, then this guy is the "real" version of Raven. He says he got locked out after chapter 15, and chapter 16 is the one in which Tara declared she had fallen out with Raven.
** What is this, the ''fourth'' time somebody claiming to be Tara, Raven, or another insider has shown up with a story? Yeah, but there's ''totally'' a chance it's true this time.
* Now, for the next order of business: ''hunting down the other guy''.
[[WMG:Tera is bthe emapra.]]
[[WMG:Tara isn't goth, she's just a poser.]]
To a real goth, any sex appeal inherent to the goth aesthetic is merely incidental to its main purpose. For Tara, though, the sex appeal is the whole point. She's no different from a prep who dresses up like a goth because she thinks its cute.
[[WMG:Tara is either the future Jane Austen of our decade, either a very young writer.]]
If Tara was thirteen, was a dreamy author, and had had to cope with bullying and restrictive parents who forbid her to really become who she wanted to be, a glamorous gothic girl, it would make sense that, despite her vivid imagination, she would be overwhelmed by her emotions and would have overlooked the reader's feelings of aggression towards a character that insults these not of the same social circle, and not be caring for grammar. Thus, she writing about a character that is morally ambiguous (but some kind of a ByronicHero) and trying her best to make it fascinating through glamorizing and not care about [[AntiHero value dissonance]].
If Tara is a young authoress and is even much more skilled, she could try to parody our modern literature and fanfiction, trying to point out all that is bad in it (disregard for the original's rules, lack of interest for the deepest part of the stories and Fire Wars). Creator/JaneAusten did it with juvenilia. She also used it in later works.
[[WMG:Tara is a USUK shipper]]
Some of her author's notes have her randomly yelling "USUK!!!!!1", which people tend to interpret as her telling her flamers that they suck, but perhaps she's actually referring to the ship name? She's already made it clear that she finds gay guys hot, and the fact that she's written Draco and Vampire as having been in some sort of relationship means that she's no stranger to shipping. And, although Hetalia isn't 'goffik' in the least, Tara does some to have an affinity of sorts for Japanese culture (or... her interpretation of it...) and so it's not that much of a stretch that she'd be into manga.

[[WMG: Tara is actually an intelligent, well-informed person.]]
Despite the abysmal quality of the characters and plot, there's numerous evidence for this theory. Why are all the funny or dirty malapropisms spelt correctly? "Masturbate" is spelt as "masticate" which is a pretty advanced word for a 13-year-old to use. Sirius' name is spelt alternately as Sodomize, Socrates and Spartacus. The last two names are not the sort of names a typical teenager would come up with. Therefore Tara must be reasonably well-read in some ancient history. [=McGonagall's=] insults are actually better than the average insult: "You mediocre dunces," "horny simpletons," the sort of things you would see in older novels a few decades ago. Similarly, the "albastard hand" is meant to be alabaster hand, which is a sort of purple prose seen in older novels, possibly the classics. To have read all these would require a better than average intelligence. Why then is the story so immature? Because Tara is a child prodigy with extensive reading but the emotions of a child.
* Alternately, Tara was bullied at school and retreated into books, where she got her vocabulary. She decided to write badly so that she would look cool and not nerdy. Needless to say, it didn't work.
** Well, if you believe [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1413070/XXXmidnitegoffXXX this guy's]] confession, Tara-- or rather, ''Todd''-- actually was bullied in school, and he created "Tara" as a kind of lightning rod to attract people's bad attention away from him.
** Hmm, unlikely. The style and sentiments expressed in My Immortal are definitely the work of a teen age girl. The social battle between goffs and preps and the redundant clothing descriptions for example.

[[WMG: Tara "Gilesbie" is actually Creator/TaraStrong, suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder due to playing so many different voice roles]]
And her "friend" "Raven" is actually a heavily [[{{Flanderization}} Flanderized]] version of the ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitans'' character portrayed by Ms. Strong, who has manifested as one of her many personalities born of getting too deep into her voice acting roles (further evidence of which is [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Tinq3ip85g contained w/in this clip]]). After all, she does have a history of trolling people w/ her Twitter account (for example, the entire BB/Raven shipper clique, which was actually "[[WesternAnimation/ThePowerpuffGirls Bubbles]]" saying the two would make a legitimately cute couple). And this is her most magnificent troll work of them all, something designed to express the insanity that comes from having to remember which [[WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddparents ten-year-]][[WesternAnimation/{{Ben10}} old boy]] she's supposed to be portraying that week. And the "hacks"? That was "[[WesternAnimation/BatmanTheAnimatedSeries Batgirl]]", trying to save the world from the insanity wrought by Ms. Strong and "Raven" before the end could be published and bring forth the end of days, c/o "Trigon".

Tara is obviously familiar with ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer'', since she referenced it at one point. Tara wrote Raven into My Immortal under the name of "Willow". In Buffy, what kind of relationship did Tara have with Willow? That's right, they were dating.

* After all, GenreSavvy {{Literature/Worm}} readers can tell you: Rule 1: Never underestimate [[TheChessmaster the Simurgh]]. Rule 2: [[UnwinnableByDesign You are underestimating the Simurgh]]. We know [[EldritchAbomination the Simurgh]] wants to cause conflict. So, it left a BrownNote perfectly designed to cause chaos, conflict, and destruction, that would persist and take effect independantly of its source, and could be promulgated across all worlds.
** The initial results, [[spoiler: [[FaceHeelTurn Scion's rampage and death]]]], were so impressive, that the Simurgh did the work to create a piece of Tinker Tech that spread the story across the internet across every reality.

[[WMG: No matter what happens, it will never be possible to know who "Tara" really is.]]
Given the length of time since the publication of ''My Immortal'' and the number of people who have come forward claiming to be or know Tara, it's probably going to remain impossible to know who the author really was or if she was sincere.

The author of what is arguably the worst fanfic in the history of bad fanfic was almost certainly either a young adolescent who now understands their mistake and is unlikely to want to have anything to do with it anymore, or a high school or college student (and their group of friends) who spent a boring half year parodying awful fanfiction. The latter seems the most likely, but in either case, the author of ''My Immortal'' is unlikely to have even retained their fanfiction.net password from 2007 to now. Any original document files have probably been lost or, if the work was sincere, possibly intentionally destroyed.

If the author were still interested in the work and wanted to come forward when they could still prove that it was theirs, they could have. Because of that, any present claims of authorship are highly suspect. It's fun to ask and to speculate about who wrote ''My Immortal'', but no answers are ever likely to be forthcoming.

[[WMG: We'll never know who Tara is, because even if she did tell us, we've already heard so many false Taras]]
Think about it. How would we know if someone claiming to be Tara is actualy Tara?
We don't.
There's no possible thing that can pinpoint someone as the real author, since her account was apparently hacked.

[[WMG: Tara Gilespie is a [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Twilight fan.]] ]]
Both Fanfic/MyImmortal and Twilight have a vampire obsession, ridonkulous "romance" plots, come off as teenage girl pandering and are SoBadItsGood. Twilight certainly seems like something Tara would like, and abandoned "My Immortal" because she was focused on this new fad.

[[WMG: ''My Immortal'' was written by Alphys]]
In August 2017, a Twitter user came forward claiming to be the writer of ''My Immortal'' via open letter. She ended the open letter like so: "P.S. Undyne is my wife, HAHAHA, SUCK IT HATERS." So what if she wrote a memoir under another name and claims to be merely a ''fan'' of ''{{Undertale}}''? No fact in the world has ever been more true than the fact that ''My Immortal'' is the brainchild of Alphys.

Chapter 35 is the "Morty McFli" chapter. Note that at the beginning of the chapter, Tara thanks someone named "Suzi" for an idea. Assuming that Tara herself is not a troll, it seems likely that "Suzi" was a troll that managed to befriend Tara and suggested the idea of adding Marty [=McFly=] to the story. Tara, not knowing any better, did as per suggestion. Evidence to back up this theory is that the "tim machine" is never described as a [=DeLorean=], but as something that fits in a pocket. This suggests that Tara does not know that it is supposed to be a [=DeLorean=] and has never seen Back to the Future.

[[WMG: Tara wrote ''My Immortal'' [[TheStoner while high]].]]
It solves the obvious problem -- you'd have to be [[ArtisticStimulation high on something]] to write something like ''My Immortal''. But it also explains the bizarre line, "I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot," with the weird capitalization -- Tara considers smoking tobacco more alarming than smoking cannabis, which is why the "[[RougeAnglesOfSatin cigarete]]" is in all-caps and the "smoke pot" is not.

A juvenile amateur "writer" writing the most infamous fic of the genre and of the generation, starring a [[ReallyGetsAround slutty]] [[DesignatedHero violent unsympathetic protagonist]] and featuring [[FetishRetardant gratitious bad sex scenes]], many malapropisms amd word crimes, [[PurpleProse excessive focus on irrelevant details]] and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking stupid]] [[{{Stripperiffic}} skimpy]] [[WTHCostumingDepartment outfits]]? [[GenerationXerox Like father, like daughter!]]

[[WMG: Tara is a former friend of JK Rowling who helped her write the Harry Potter books]]
Tara was upset that Rowling didn't give her due credit for her work, so she decided to get revenge with a horrible fanfiction. This explains why Tara knew about Harry being the seventh horcrux before this was revealed.

[[WMG: The Author is a Potterhead from the Caucuses who is obsessed with "goth" culture]]
Considering the fact that "Azkaban" is somehow corrupted to Azerbaijan and Abkhazia, a region of Georgia, both of which are relatively obsure.

[[WMG: Tara is [[GodwinsLaw Adolf Hitler]]]]
After decades of torture in Hell, Hitler succumbed to Satan's will, and pledged allegiance to him, who judged him as being immensley evil, and ressurrected him as an Archdemon. Demon! Hitler, now with knowledge of greater evils and immense power, possessed Tara, and used her to write an English-language translation of My Immortal, which is viewed as high art in Hell, in order to torment Sinners with the knowledge of what awaits them in Hell.
Hitler was chosen to write it since he is the only Archdemon of Human origin, and, as such knows the most of all Demons about Human cultures.


This is [[IncrediblyLamePun Führer]] supported by "Das Nitemare b4 Xmas", which would be as grammatically correct in German as the rest of the story is in English.

"Raven" was in actuality Rudolf Hess, Hitler's real-life deputy and the first GrammarNazi in the world.

[[WMG: My Immortal is a religious text from the far future]]
Thousands of years after a nuclear war, several damaged copies of Harry Potter and an as-yet unwritten Gothic Young Adult Urban Fantasy series where discovered by the residents of post-apocalyptic Dubai, which has been corrupted to "Dubya". The leader of the expidition, Tara, discovered the books and took them to a prophet named Raven, who interpreted them as messages from the Umarkans and Imratis, the gods of the Goffs, a tribe who inhabit Dubya. Raven ordered Tara to transcribe them into Dubyan, the horrifically mangled version of English, and Raven acted as the editor. Tara, a soldier in the Goff Army, later went to battle, hence why she said "omfg im leeving dubya pretty soon kant wait!!! Diz wil prolly be da last chaptah until I kum bak," but was tragically killed in battle against the Preps.

The "hacker" was in actuality a Prep Spy who vandalized several chapters.

[[WMG: The author is actually a fan of Music/HilaryDuff]]
And either she's a troll, or she was just super insecure and desperate to be seen as a credible goth back when she wrote ''My Immortal,'' and so ''acted'' like she hated Duff. As proof, Ebony at one point references a scene from Duff's film ''A Cinderella Story'' and compares the scene positively to her relationship with Draco, meaning that despite her insistence that she and her character Ebony hate Duff, the author is familiar with the film and her character Ebony thinks those scenes are desirable examples of romance.

[[WMG: Tara has dyslexia]]
Why else would the spelling be so....THAT!

[[WMG: Tara intentionally wrote Ebony as a bad person/Ebony is aware she's a bad person]]

Most readers assume that Ebony comes off as a bad person because of Tara's poor writing skills. But there's a strong case to be made that she was intentionally creating an antihero. Think about it: Ebony and her friends celebrate things that are considered bad such as Satan, suicide, hard drugs and violence. Tara sees "goffs" as people who embrace the dark side, and that includes more than just heavy eyeliner and emo music. It also includes negative personality traits.
Additionally, Enoby knows she's not a nice person and is proud of it because she associates niceness with preps.

[[WMG: Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way actually lives in the canonical ''Harry Potter'' universe.]]

Dumbledore listens to an N*SYNC song on her "tim machine" iPod. Now how did that get there....?

When Ebony said that she was a sadist, she means the "sado-" part of "sadomasochism" -- she's a wannabe dominatrix. Emphasis on the "wannabe" -- she's a shallow idiot who understands BDSM about as well as she understands being gothic. She doesn't understand that a BDSM-type sadist isn't an ''actual'' sadist -- they only pretend to be one when they hae sex. This is why she's capable of feeling sorry for Voldemort despite being a "sadist". She's also never really ''had'' BDSM sex, because none of her sexual partners (Draco, Vampire, ''et al'') are into it, and she just wants to be a part of the subculture -- she's perfectly capable of sexual satisfaction with just "vanilla" sex.

As the story goes on, she makes less and less sense; entire paragraphs are placed before they are happening. The already bad grammar continues to go downhill as she writes, ending up as a garbled mess. "Raven" is just a figment of her imagination, or else another side to her personality who has much better grammar and spelling. The hacker's chapter was the last straw and was what she thought happened when she truly cracked.

[[WMG: Proof Ebony is bisexual]]
The way she describes her female friends can be quite leering at times, such as mentioning Willow's "really big bobs".

[[WMG: Ebony has Bipolar Disorder.]]
Actually, much of the 'Goffik' cast may qualify.

The symptoms of bipolar disorder, according to this [[http://www.healthline.com/adamcontent/bipolar-disorder?utm_medium=ask&utm_source=smart&utm_campaign=article&utm_term=Bipolar+Disorder&ask_return=Bipolar+Disorder Healthline website]] include: [[MoodSwinger Mood Swings]]; [while in the manic state:] [[SmallNameBigEgo inflated]] [[AttentionWhore self-esteem]], lack of self-control, [[HairTriggerTemper poor temper control]], [[LeeroyJenkins reckless behaviour]] {i.e. [[FearlessFool impaired judgement]], [[BeAWhoreToGetYourMan sexual]] [[MyGirlIsASlut promiscuity]]}; [while in the [[TheEeyore depressive]] state:] [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny difficulty concentrating]], [[SelectiveMemory remembering]], or making decisions, [[NietzscheWannabe feelings of worthlessness]], persistent [[NightmareFuelStationAttendant thoughts of death]], and [[DeathSeeker suicidal]] thoughts.

Also, "There is a high risk of suicide with bipolar disorder. While in either phase, patients may abuse alcohol or other substances, which can worsen the symptoms. Sometimes there is an overlap between the two phases. Manic and depressive symptoms may occur simultaneously or in quick succession in what is called a mixed state."

[[WMG: Ebony is in Azkaban]]
This is prior to the Ministry removing the Dementors from the fortress (post DH), and Fanfic/MyImmortal was the [[ApocalypticLog thoughts (scratched into the wall) of a person slowly going mad]].

[[WMG: Ebony is a resident of Ward 49]]
Ward 49 (aka the Janus Thickey Ward on the fourth floor {Spell Damage} of St. Mungo's Hospital) houses long-term residents whose brains had been permanently affected by magic (i.e. the Longbottoms, Lockhart). Fanfic/MyImmortal is her journal. Chapter 39 is a brief period of lucidity.
* Or a patient in the Hospital Wing. See this fanfic [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8067803/1/Willow_Charms]]

Satan is not just a nickname. He eventually came to be known as Satan and was worshipped. Ebony and her friends don't know this, and Voldy probably cast a spell so he can keep taps on anyone who is a Satanist, or uses his name. Voldemort probably managed to make it so that any Satanist would do his bidding, and Ebony and co. are just pawns in his complicated power play. That's why Snape was freaked out about Hargrid being a goff (mistaking it for being related to Satan): he's used to people being controlled by Voldemort, but was shocked to learn that Hargrid had fallen in with him. Thus explaining all the CharacterDerailment.

[[WMG: Ebony had been driven to insanity by the Cruciatus Curse]]
Not enough to make her a shell like the Longbottoms, but enough that she has no grip on reality.

[[WMG: Ebony is a threat to us all.]]
The final chapter didn't end because of any of the above. Ebony gained full MediumAwareness, and knows we exist. Thusly, she's hiding her actions [[TheFourthWallWillNotProtectYou to reach our reality.]] And there she will use her Sue-ness to warp our universe into her demented vision. The disapperance of Tara is essentially her first thrust into our world.

[[WMG: Ebony is being tortured by the Death Eaters.]]
The story takes place during ''Deathly Hallows'', when the Death Eaters have taken over Hogwarts. Ebony is a Slytherin in the same year as Harry. She's a Muggle-born, but she's also a Seer, which explains her close relationship with Trelawney.\\

But other characters are real, and they're worried. Britney is Ebony's twin sister, who has no idea why Ebony has changed so much and tries fruitlessly to help her. Willow/Raven is another friend who's worried about Ebony, but Ebony's fragile mental state leads her to accidentally get both of them to punish and try to kill Willow; after that, Willow abandons Ebony. Neville is also trying to help her, but he's leading Dumbledore's Army and has a lot on his plate, so he can't devote all of his attention to her. Draco is somewhere in between; the first sex scene with him is real, but it's passionless pity sex, and the subsequent sex scenes are actually Ebony's torturers [[RapeIsASpecialKindOfEvil raping her]]. Filch is also an "in-betweener"; he's one of her torturers, too, but his identity is swapped with that of his cat.\\

[[WMG: Tara is really a guy.]]
Think about it: Every time unmentionables are mentioned, Tara gets into all the gorey details of male private parts, but only refers to Ebony's as "my you-know-what". Then there's all the slip-ups like 'he put his dude-thingy in mine' and too many instances of implying that Enoby is a Hermaphrodite. It's too convenient to be a coincidence! My guess is that [[WhatDoYouMeanItWasntMadeOnDrugs some dude got really high and decided to right this as part of some sort of prank]].
* Meth is a hell of a drug.

Her mere presence has driven all of the Harry Potter characters to insanity.

Centuries before he had Picard to bug, Q came down to Earth, took the form of a teenage girl, and altered the people of Hogwarts according to his whims. Willow is also a Q, which is why she came back after she "died".
** ''AND BY EXTENSION'', she is [[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Discord]]!

[[WMG: Ebony is the AnthropomorphicPersonification of badfics in general]]
There is a reason she uses every single MarySue cliche. She is not simply a Harry Potter fan character. She is the entire concept of bad fanfiction in general, given a human form.
** And she's warping the fabric of reality around Hogwarts to her will!

Her name is Ivory Light Innocence Dove Way. She is the preppiest prep ever. She never swears, is a virgin, and can't stand any of the so-called "goffic" bands. She is a werewolf. She has pale blonde hair with frosted blue tips and braided in yellow streaks. And she can spell perfectly.
* Also, she's a PuritySue.
** Someone needs to write this. It'd be interesting to hear about Ivory's misadventures in this twisted version of Hogwarts!
*** It is here, under the name of ' 'Till the World Ends '! It is written with purple prose, with Ivory wangsting about her horrible past, with new werewolf powers coming out of the blue from barely any mythological source, and Ivory redeeming all the characters that Ebony gothicized. Also, Ivory understands what it means to be a prep as much as Ebony understands what it means to be a goth.
** Despite being {{different as night and day}}, Ebony and Ivory [[Music/PaulMcCartney live together]] [[Music/StevieWonder in perfect harmony]] side by side on their piano keyboard.

She came to Earth in an attempt to conquer it. Just being around her causes people to go insane and become hopelessly attracted to her / want to follow her and become her clone. Prepz are people who can somewhat resist her, they still go insane and often turn evil, but they do not become perfect clones of her. The only hope for the version of the Potterverse that she resides in is for the Doctor to come and save the day.

[[WMG: Enoby is (or is somehow mentally linked to) [[TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}} an Ork.]]]]

Just think about it. Both of them (said to be) powerful. Both try to redeem Voldemort. Both of them fall in love with someone who goes on to become a Dark wizard, despite their attempts to change them, and both end up having to fight them. And both have more names than usual. ''And'' their names both refer to colors: Ebony (black) and Albus (white).

[[WMG: Ebony is an UnreliableNarrator.]]
She switches subjects and how slit wrists can harm people so many times, that it eventually makes you think that she's just making shit up as she goes along. Maybe she's just in Azkaban.

[[WMG: Enoby is the next wave of the ''VisualNovel/SayaNoUta'' invasion]]
She's somehow managed to make everyone at hogwarts suffer the same disorder Fuminori did, turning the world into a huge crapfest and shrouding her own disgusting self behind the appearance of a goffik chick she saw on a magazine, thus explaining why she's so easy (She's collecting semen just as Saya did).

Don't ask.

[[WMG: Ebony and the other "goffs" are really [[VillainProtagonist the bad guys]]]]
The author threw in some ObviouslyEvil traits (like HollywoodSatanism and being a vampire) to see if anyone would get a hint as to Ebony's true alignment. Voldemort was supposed to pull an EnemyMine with Gryffandor in the final battle because Ebony had a plot to kill Harry, and Voldemort won't let anyone else [[TheOnlyOneAllowedToDefeatYou to kill him]] due to his [[NoYay very creepy]] [[{{Yandere}} obsession with him]]. Or you know what? Let's just stop at "Ebony is the bad guy" and leave it at that.

[[WMG: Ebony is only a Satanist because of [[Series/{{Supernatural}} Samifer]]]]
If the author could predict [[spoiler:Harry being a Horcrux]] they could predict [[Creator/JaredPadalecki this]]

[[WMG: Ebony has powerful magic and uses mind control to make the Harry Potter characters her mind slaves.]]
The villains are really the only ones unaffected and dedicated to fighting against Ebony. The stranger and more...eccentric moments are just misunderstandings on Ebony's part because she's half insane herself.

And that's how she can "talk in silence". Because Sign Language is silent. However, it is Goffik Sign Language and can only be understood by other Goffs. Perhaps it is by knowing and being fluent in Goffik Sin Language (geddit) that one can become Goffik when they were not before, and how a Goff can sort out the Posers from the real Goffs.

[[WMG: Ebony has powers similar to [[VideoGame/NiNoKuni Shadar.]]]]
At some point during the plot of Harry Potter, a witch with [[WrongContextMagic unusual magic]] appeared and derailed it. Many of the characters are acting strangely because they have become Brokenhearted (Borkenhearthed?). Harry and company have become depressed goths because they lost their Hope and Enthusiasm. Draco got hit with something similar, but a little mistake by Ebony resulted in him getting extra Kindness, hence why he's willing to move in the same social circle as Hermoine. Voldemort is trying to have someone else kill Harry for him because he lost his courage, and is now too scared to face Harry himself. Brittany was once a very nice girl in Gryffindor who wasn't involved in the plot, until Ebony decided to remove her Kindness. Ebony's heart breaking spree was brought to an end when she got into a fight with Dumbledore. He managed to turn one of her spells back on her, stripping her of her Ambition (and accidentally taking a big chunk of her memories.) He acts erratically because he's had his own heart broken, but he's experimenting on himself to fix it, so he can fix everyone else.

[[WMG: Ebony is Transgender.]]

She used to have a penis but she traded it for a vagina during some sort of sex change. That’s why she says whenever she sees a hot person she’s reminded of the times she had a penis and all people with penises get erections.
* Maybe shortly after she transitioned to the female gender, it was either herself, her parents (if they exist) or someone else who wanted her to have a sex change and so she did.
* Speaking of the sex change, it was either surgical or magical. We really don’t know if there are spells and potions that change a person’s sex permanently in the Potterverse, but the closest thing to a sex-changing thing is the Polyjuice Potion. If not a surgery would work. Changing your gender is easy but changing your sex is hard.

She buys from American stores, after all. And if she thinks English accents are sexy, she probably doesn't have one herself. She could be Scottish, but Tara seemed to forget that Hogwarts was in Scotland.

[[WMG: Ebony is a HumanoidAbomination that has powers similar to those of vampires, but she isn't a vampire]]

[[WMG: Ebony is Atlantiana Rebekah Loren from Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen ]]

She wanted to escape the messy situation she found herself in, so she emigrated to the UK, adopted a new name and dyed her hair black because it was as different from her natural pale blonde hair as you can get.
She also possibly experimented with a potion or spell that altered her memory, to avoid blowing her cover and leave her past behind (that's why she claims she lost her 'virility' to Draco even though Atlantiana wasn't a virgin).
The fact that she's American and new at Hogwarts explains why she doesn't recognize Harry Potter at first, notices his English accent and is obsessed with American shops such as Hot Topic.
Notice that Ebony never says anything her past even though she mentions the backstory of minor characters such as Darkness, Crabb and Goyle; it's odd given how self-obsessed she is.

[[WMG: Alternatively, Ebony is Tiana's mother!]]
C'mon, the comparison was inevitable. The two of them are impossibly beautiful, gothic (or goffik), dress like whores yet slutshame people who dress in similar fashion, are extreme jerkasses, have blue eyes.

It may also explain why she was a human before having sex with Edward DESPITE her biological father being Caius, Ebony used her wizard powers to turn Atlantiana into a human (unless she sexed a vampire) so she wouldn't be BlessedWithSuck like her (remember that Ebony hated being as perfect as she is for... reasons). And you may be asking: How did Ebony manage to get impregnated with Tiana despite being a vampire? Because OurVampiresAreDifferent is in effect.

[[WMG: In fact, Ebony is not only Tiana's mother, she's also [[FanFic/BrewdeningLove Joan]] and [[Fanfic/TwilaTheGirlWhoWazInLuvWithAVampyre Twila's]] mother.]]

A juvenile amateur "writer" writing the most infamous SnarkBait of the genre and of the generation, starring a [[ReallyGetsAround slutty]] [[DesignatedHero violent unsympathetic protagonist]] and featuring [[FetishRetardant gratitious bad sex scenes]], many malapropisms amd word crimes, [[PurpleProse excessive focus on irrelevant details]] and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking stupid]] [[{{Stripperiffic}} skimpy]] [[WTHCostumingDepartment outfits]]? [[GenerationXerox Like father, like daughter!]]

The fic reads very much like an American high school drama, using one of its tried and true tropes: {{nerd}}s vs. cool people. Tara, being a loser, didn't want to write a typical "nerds vs. jocks" fic because she desperately wanted to sound cool and unique. Hence, Ebony's gang is a bunch of goths, and the jocks become preps. However, Tara's desire to be cool leaks into her portrayal of "goff" culture; she hates the preps because she wants to ''be'' one, and she accidentally makes the goffs behave more preppy and cool than they should in this type of fic.

In keeping with [=NaNoWriMo=]'s ethos, "Tara" just hammered out whatever was in her head to work as fast as possible, without going back to proofread (as they say, editing is for the following month). In the early chapters, it's actually not ''too'' bad. But once the story picked up a cult following and people started commenting on the terrible spelling and grammar, "Tara" decided to turn it UpToEleven. [=NaNoWriMo=] also explains the lack of continuity (it's all WritingByTheSeatOfYourPants), as well as the random plot twists and pop-culture references -- [=NaNo=] encourages these, calling them "plot bunnies". In sum, the whole thing is the product of a process that encourages writing down as many words as possible, as fast as possible, with no other consideration.

Written by none other than Tara Gilesbe. What other way to screw with people's heads and prove you've improved/it was all a TrollFic than by writing a decent version of [[SoBadItsGood My]] [[UpToEleven Immortal?]]

There's been a ''lot'' of digital ink spilled about this fanfic -- not just on [[Wiki/TVTropes This Very Wiki]], but elsewhere on the Internet. But why? What's so special about ''this'' fanfic? Well, it's entirely because it was written by an ordinary teenage girl. It's an insight into teenagers on the Internet in its halcyon days, before anyone had [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny seen that kind of thing before]], before the parade of imitators who lacked the earnest drive of the original. It was a bizarre, understated, perfect collision of two otherwise distinct worlds -- attention-seeking teenage girls, and intrepid Internet explorers.\\

Her knowledge of Tara's favorite music is uneven, to say the least. Yes, some of the songs mentioned in the fic, like "Demolition Lovers", are pretty damn obscure. On the other hand, if she knew anything about the genre, she'd know that Music/GreenDay is not as "emo" as people think. She probably skimmed her fans' profiles on FF.net and did some cursory research on Wiki/{{Wikipedia}} -- enough to pick up the name of a song and learn that a store called Hot Topic is popular among wannabe-emo kids, but not enough to pass for a legit fan. It's eerily reminiscent of her canonical "generic rock star" description of Bill Weasley.\\

It's written along the lines of ''Literature/GoAskAlice'' -- it purports to be the diary of a real Slytherin student, but it's BasedOnAGreatBigLie. And it's not very well researched, either, given its bizarre conception of what teenage students are thinking and its misunderstanding of Muggle culture. But its purpose is to show Pureblood parents how bad Hogwarts has supposedly gotten under Dumbledore. The bad spelling and grammar are intentional, to show the school's horrendous academic standards. Its portrayal of even hardcore Slytherins like Draco Malfoy rejecting Voldemort and embracing Muggle culture are meant to [[YouCanPanicNow shock and offend the sensibilities of the parents]]. ''My Immortal'' circulates among the parents, and sadly several of them are sufficiently ignorant to take it seriously.\\

Starring Tara Gilesbie and Jenny (Raven). It explains the occasional inconsistencies in Tara's character [[StaticCharacter and why she never grows as a person in over three years]]. The story is probably a parody of fanfic writers themselves. Whether or not the author was trolling or never thought people would believe her story is irrelevant.

All right, we have to get this out of the way first -- Tara is who you think she is at first glance. She's not a MagnificentBastard {{Troll}}, nor is she an [[StaticCharacter eternal wannabe emo-Goth]]. This may seem like it's missing the point of Wild Mass Guessing or otherwise being TheKilljoy, but there's actually something interesting to this when you think about it.\\

Most readers assume that Ebony comes off as a bad person because of Tara's poor writing skills. But there's a strong case to be made that she was intentionally creating an antihero. Think about: Ebony and her friends celebrate things that are considered bad such as Satan, suicide, hard drugs and violence. Tara sees "goffs" as people who embrace the dark side, and that includes more than just heavy eyeliner and emo music. It also includes negative personality traits.
Additionally, Enoby knows she's not a nice person and is proud of it because she associates niceness with preps.

Tara is your average, well-adjusted teenage girl. She has basic tastes for someone of her time period. She likes Aeropostale, Hilary Duff, bright colors, and the Disney Channel. There is some evidence to suggest this. In one scene, Enoby favorably compares her and Draco's kiss to Hilary Duff in "A Cinderella Story" and at one point rattles off a list of prep stores. Also consider how stereotypical the goffs act and how obvious the references to goth culture are.

Tara decided to go on fanficiton.net to get back at these goths.

Ebony implies that there's two rival groups at school--the preps and the goffs.

[[WMG: The preps are a rebellion against the goffs]]
Originally, Hogwarts was like any other school where the students had a variety of different fashion styles and interests. Then the "goff" subculture started to form when emo music became popular. As seen in the story, the "goffs" are pretty off the wall, running around the school naked, shouting profanities at the drop of a hat, and casually cutting. The other students tried to distance themselves from the goffs as such as possible.

Additionally, Enoby knows she's not a nice person

Think about: Ebony and her friends

The author threw in some ObviouslyEvil traits (like HollywoodSatanism and being a vampire) to see if anyone would get a hint as to Ebony's true alignment. Voldemort was supposed to pull an EnemyMine with Gryffandor in the final battle because Ebony had a plot to kill Harry, and Voldemort [[FoeYay won't let anyone else]] [[TheOnlyOneAllowedToDefeatYou to kill him]] due to his [[NoYay very creepy]] [[{{Yandere}} obsession with him]]. Or you know what? Let's just stop at "Ebony is the bad guy" and leave it at that.

[[If a My Immortal movies was to be made]]

[[In fact, Ebony is not only Tiana's mother, she's also [[FanFic/BrewdeningLove Joan]] and [[Fanfic/TwilaTheGirlWhoWazInLuvWithAVampyre Twila's]] mother.]]

She wanted to escape the messy situation she found herself in, so she emigrated to the UK, adopted a new name and dyed her hair black because it was as different as her natural pale blonde hair as you can get. She also possibly experimented with some potion or spell that altered her memory, to avoid blowing her cover and leave her past behind (that's why she claims she lost her 'virility' to Draco even though Atlantiana wasn't a virgin).

The fic was so bad that it began to warp the rules of grammar. It caught the Grammar Police's attention early on, but they couldn't find it on the Internet until the "hacker" tipped them off. Just after Ebony [[YouMakeMeSic shooted]] ''Avada Kedavra'' (and missed), the Grammar Police barged in and arrested all the characters. They also got Tara, who's currently locked in a mental asylum, while doctors and linguists work to rehabilitate her into a proper speller. "Tara" and "Raven"'s subsequent interactions with their fans are characters from the fic granted brief parole from their imprisonment. Britney and Darkness escaped and became fugitives in the world of fanfiction, terrorizing the characters of other fics.

A juvenile amateur "writer" writing the most infamous SnarkBait of the genre and of the generation, starring a [[ReallyGetsAround slutty]] [[DesignatedHero violent unsympathetic protagonist]] and featuring [[FetishRetardant gratitious bad sex scenes]], many malapropisms amd [[YouMakeMeSic word crimes]], [[PurpleProse excessive focus on irrelevant details]] and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking stupid]] [[{{Stripperiffic}} skimpy]] [[WTHCostumingDepartment outfits]]? [[GenerationXerox Like father, like daughter!]]

[[WMG:A Maru Sue is a Mary Sue whose Suedom manifests in winning the [[Franchise/StarTrek Kobayashi Maru]].