History Quotes / GagNose

-->-- [[CyranoDeBergerac '''Cyrano de Bergerac''']]

-->-- The same scene in ''{{Roxanne}}''

-> ''You might have said at least a hundred things''
-> ''By varying the tone ... like this, suppose, ...''
-> ''Aggressive: 'Sir, if I had such a nose''
-> ''I'd amputate it!' Friendly: 'When you sup''
-> ''It must annoy you, dipping in your cup;''
-> ''You need a drinking-bowl of special shape!''
-> ''Descriptive: ''Tis a rock! ... a peak! ... a cape!''
-> ''--A cape, forsooth! 'Tis a peninsular! ''
-> ''Curious: 'How serves that oblong capsular?''
-> ''For scissor-sheath? Or pot to hold your ink?''
-> ''Gracious: 'You love the little birds, I think?''
-> ''I see you've managed with a fond research''
-> ''To find their tiny claws a roomy perch!''
-> ''Truculent: 'When you smoke your pipe ... suppose''
-> ''That the tobacco-smoke spouts from your nose--''
-> ''Do not the neighbors, as the fumes rise higher,''
-> ''Cry terror-struck: "The chimney is afire"?''
-> ''Considerate: 'Take care, ... your head bowed low''
-> ''By such a weight ... lest head o'er heels you go!''
-> ''Tender: 'Pray get a small umbrella made,''
-> ''Lest its bright color in the sun should fade!''
-> ''Pedantic: 'That beast Aristophanes''
-> ''Names Anticonceptionnelles''
-> ''Must have possessed just such a solid lump''
-> ''Of flesh and bone, beneath his forehead's bump!''
-> ''Cavalier: 'The last fashion, friend, that hook?''
-> ''To hang your hat on? 'Tis a useful crook!''
-> ''Emphatic: 'No wind, O majestic nose,''
-> ''Can give THEE cold!--save when the mistral blows!''
-> ''Dramatic: 'When it bleeds, what a Red Sea!''
-> ''Admiring: 'Sign for a perfumery!''
-> ''Lyric: 'Is this a conch? ... a Triton you?''
-> ''Simple: 'When is the monument on view?''
-> ''Rustic: 'That thing a nose? Marry-come-up!''
-> '' 'Tis a dwarf pumpkin, or a prize turnip! ''
-> ''Military: 'Point against cavalry!' ''
-> ''Practical: 'Put it in a lottery!''
-> ''Assuredly 'twould be the biggest prize!''
-> ''Or ... parodying Pyramus' sighs ...''
-> '' 'Behold the nose that mars the harmony''
-> ''Of its master's phiz! blushing its treachery!' ''
-> ''--Such, my dear sir, is what you might have said,''
-> ''Had you of wit or letters the least jot:''
-> ''But, O most lamentable man!--of wit''
-> ''You never had an atom, and of letters''
-> ''You have three letters only!--they spell Ass!''
-> ''And--had you had the necessary wit,''
-> ''To serve me all the pleasantries I quote''
-> ''Before this noble audience ... e'en so,''
-> ''You would not have been let to utter one--''
-> ''Nay, not the half or quarter of such jest!''
-> ''I take them from myself all in good part,''
-> ''But not from any other man that breathes!''

-> ''All right, twenty something betters. I start with the obvious: ''
-> ''Excuse me, is that your nose or did a bus park on your face? ''
-> ''Meteorological: Everybody take cover, she will blow! ''
-> ''Fashionable: You could de-emphasise your nose if you wore something larger... like Wyoming. ''
-> ''Personal: Well, here we are... Just the three of us. ''
-> ''Punctual: Okay, your nose was on time, but you were 10 minutes late. ''
Envious: Oh, I wish I were you... to be able to smell your own ear!''
Naughty: Some of the ladies have asked if you would put that thing away.''
Philosophical: It is not the size of a nose that is important... it is what is in it that matters.''
Humorous: Laugh and the world laughs with you... sneeze and it is goodbye,Seattle.''
Commercial: Hi, I am Earl Scheib and I can paint that nose for $100!''
Polite: Would you mind not bobbing your head? The orchestra keeps changing the tempo.''
Melodic: Everybody. He has got the whole world in his nose. ''
Sympathetic: What happened? Did your parents lose a bet with God? ''
Complimentary: You must love the birdies... to give them this to perch on.''
Scientific: Say, does that thing there influence the tides?
Obscure: Whoa, I would hate to see the grindstone. Well, think about it.''
Inquiry: When you stop and smell the flowers... are they afraid?''
French: The pigs have refused to find any more truffles... until you leave.''
Pornographic: Finally a man who can satisfy two women at once. How many is that?''
- Fourteen, Chief.''
All right, religious:The Lord giveth ...and He just kept on giving, did he not? Fifteen. ''
Disgusting: Say, who mows your nose hair? Sixteen.''
-> ''Paranoid: Keep that guy away from my cocaine! Seventeen.''
-> ''Aromatic: It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee...in Brazil. Eighteen.''
-> ''Appreciative: Oh, how original.Most people just have their teeth capped.Nineteen.''
-> ''All right... [...] Dirty: Your name would not be Dick, would it?''

-> ''CYRANO: Ah no! young blade! That was a trifle short!''

''By varying the tone ... like this, suppose, ...''
''Aggressive: 'Sir, if I had such a nose''
''I'd amputate it!' Friendly: 'When you sup''
''It must annoy you, dipping in your cup;''
''You need a drinking-bowl of special shape!' ''
''Descriptive: ''Tis a rock! ... a peak! ... a cape!''
''--A cape, forsooth! 'Tis a peninsular!' ''
''Curious: 'How serves that oblong capsular?''
''For scissor-sheath? Or pot to hold your ink?' ''
''Gracious: 'You love the little birds, I think?''
''I see you've managed with a fond research''
''To find their tiny claws a roomy perch!' ''
''Truculent: 'When you smoke your pipe ... suppose''
''That the tobacco-smoke spouts from your nose--''
''Do not the neighbors, as the fumes rise higher,''
''Cry terror-struck: "The chimney is afire"?' ''
''Considerate: 'Take care, ... your head bowed low''
''By such a weight ... lest head o'er heels you go!' ''
''Tender: 'Pray get a small umbrella made,''
''Lest its bright color in the sun should fade!' ''
''Pedantic: 'That beast Aristophanes''
''Names Anticonceptionnelles''
''Must have possessed just such a solid lump''
''Of flesh and bone, beneath his forehead's bump!' ''
''Cavalier: 'The last fashion, friend, that hook?''
''To hang your hat on? 'Tis a useful crook!' ''
''Emphatic: 'No wind, O majestic nose,''
''Can give THEE cold!--save when the mistral blows!' ''
''Dramatic: 'When it bleeds, what a Red Sea!' ''
''Admiring: 'Sign for a perfumery!' ''
''Lyric: 'Is this a conch? ... a Triton you?' ''
''Simple: 'When is the monument on view?' ''
''Rustic: 'That thing a nose? Marry-come-up!''
'' 'Tis a dwarf pumpkin, or a prize turnip!' ''
''Military: 'Point against cavalry!' ''
''Practical: 'Put it in a lottery!''
''Assuredly 'twould be the biggest prize!' ''
''Or ... parodying Pyramus' sighs ...''
'' 'Behold the nose that mars the harmony''
''Of its master's phiz! blushing its treachery!' ''
''--Such, my dear sir, is what you might have said,''
''Had you of wit or letters the least jot:''
''But, O most lamentable man!--of wit''
''You never had an atom, and of letters''
''You have three letters only!--they spell Ass!''
''And--had you had the necessary wit,''
''To serve me all the pleasantries I quote''
''Before this noble audience ... e'en so,''
''You would not have been let to utter one--''
''Nay, not the half or quarter of such jest!''
''I take them from myself all in good part,''
''But not from any other man that breathes!''

All right, twenty something betters. I start with the obvious:
Excuse me, is that your nose or did a bus park on your face?
Meteorological: Everybody take cover, she will blow!
Fashionable: You could de-emphasise your nose if you wore something larger... like Wyoming.
Personal: Well, here we are... Just the three of us.
Punctual: Okay, your nose was on time, but you were 10 minutes late.
Envious: Oh, I wish I were you... to be able to smell your own ear!
Naughty: Some of the ladies have asked if you would put that thing away.
Philosophical: It is not the size of a nose that is important... it is what is in it that matters.
Humorous: Laugh and the world laughs with you... sneeze and it is goodbye,Seattle.
Commercial: Hi, I am Earl Scheib and I can paint that nose for $100!
Polite: Would you mind not bobbing your head? The orchestra keeps changing the tempo.
Melodic: Everybody. He has got the whole world in his nose.
Sympathetic: What happened? Did your parents lose a bet with God?
Complimentary: You must love the birdies... to give them this to perch on.

Obscure: Whoa, I would hate to see the grindstone. Well, think about it.
Inquiry: When you stop and smell the flowers... are they afraid?
French: The pigs have refused to find any more truffles... until you leave.
Pornographic: Finally a man who can satisfy two women at once. How many is that?
- Fourteen, Chief.
All right, religious:The Lord giveth ...and He just kept on giving, did he not?Fifteen.
Disgusting: Say, who mows your nose hair? Sixteen.
Paranoid: Keep that guy away from my cocaine! Seventeen.
Aromatic: It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee...in Brazil. Eighteen.
Appreciative: Oh, how original.Most people just have their teeth capped.Nineteen.
All right... [...] Dirty: Your name would not be Dick, would it?

''You might have said at least a hundred things''