History Narm / Music

* The horns on Music/JohnnyCash's "Ring of Fire" sound funny for [[LyricalDissonance some reason]], despite the song's serious lyrics. This is probably why it's used in a lot of comedies.

There are some who enjoy the [[NarmCharm over-the-top, exaggerated and silly nature of Metal]], and there are those that... don't.

* [[DreadfulMusician Sid Vicious']] cover of "My Way" could well be one of the best examples available. It is well played, but Music/SidVicious vocals are impossible to listen to without either [[DarthWiki/SoBadItsHorrible turning it off and vowing never to listen to it again]] or listen to without fighting the urge not to laugh. [[NarmCharm At the same time]], you can't help marvelling at his [[ClusterFBomb choice of lyrics]] (he didn't know all the lyrics, so he wrote what he didn't know, according to Website/TheOtherWiki). You can't help wondering how many drugs (and/or units of alcohol) were in his system when the idea came to him... yet it is still My Way done his way.\\

* Wrestling/HulkHogan And The Wrestling Boot Band's album ''[[http://www.i-mockery.com/bad-albums/hogan/ Hulk Rules]]'' alternates between SoBadItsGood and DarthWiki/SoBadItsHorrible in general, but [[http://www.i-mockery.com/bad-albums/hogan/hogan1.mp3 "Hulkster In Heaven"]] stands out as narm since it's the only song that's really meant to be taken seriously to begin with. It's supposed to be a sincere tribute to a fan who died at a young age, but the lyrics keep throwing in gratuitous references to Hulk Hogan himself ("I used to tear my shirt, but now you tore my heart/ I knew you were a hulkamaniac right from the very start"), to the point where it's almost more about him than it is his late fan. Then there's the cheesy synthesized backing music, and of course the fact that, well, it's ''Hulk Hogan'' singing what's meant to be a moving ballad (with some much more capable gospel-style backing vocalists helping out). Granted, it doesn't make the story behind the song any less sad, but just see if you can force a tear while listening to it.

* Music/{{Set It Off|Band}}'s "Wolf in Sheep's Clothing" is an angry diatribe directed at someone for pretending to be nice while backstabbing people. It sounds like it was written (and sung) by an edgy teenager going through his emo phase, while trying to be clever and sophisticated by using--of all things--fairy tale and nursery rhyme references like "Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any soul? / No, sir, by the way, what the hell are morals?" and "Fee-fi-fo-fum, you better run and hide / I smell the blood of a petty little coward!"

* Music/{{Immortal}} are the grim and frostbitten butt-monkeys of black metal, with lines such as this:

** "Monster" being a poor man's [[Music/ThreeDaysGrace "Animal I Have Become"]] is excusable, but nothing excuses digitally altering the singer's voice to ''emulate'' [[GutturalGrowler growling]], especially when vocalists who can naturally switch from singing to growling/screaming are a dime a dozen. The fake growling wasn't on the original album version -- if only it had stayed that way... It also doesn't help that the first line of the song sounds like he's singing "this secret [[HoYay sodomy]]".

* Music/{{Rush}}: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTFHwTKWawU The video for "Time Stand Still."]] An emotional power ballad ruined by a video that makes "Rock Me Tonite" look like the epitome of cool, with horrific green-screen work that basically involves showing the band members floating - yes, ''floating'' - in front of random backdrops. Even though it was done in 1987, there's still no excuse for this monstrosity.

** "I have played in every toilet" [[ItMakesSenseInContext makes sense in the context]] of Muscle Museum [[note]](the [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet_circuit "toilet circuit"]] is a set of small venues in the UK, with the term either stemming from the spaces being cramped and dirty or from bands having to use public restrooms as dressing rooms)[[/note]] , but it sounds really funny if you don't know what it actually means .

** "I have played in every toilet" [[ItMakesSenseInContext makes sense in the context]] of Muscle Museum, but it sounds really funny if you don't know what it actually means.

** And what sort of non-comedic band deliberately names themselves after an Elvis Presley send-up by [[[Music/TheBonzoDogBand the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band]]?

* Much of Music/{{Lonestar}}'s repertoire from "Amazed" onward. They were basically doing 10 years ago what Rascal Flatts is doing now: lightweight, formulaic PowerBallad fluff with ridiculously over-the-top vocals and bombastic production — however, they sang about family and home instead of love, and Richie [=McDonald's=] voice was far less whiny. Witness such gems as...

Spider’s web with blood o’ercast!\\

** And what sort of non-comedic band deliberately names themselves after an Elvis Presley send-up by the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band?

* Music/{{Creed}}'s "Signs" has the line "This is not about sex" followed by Scott Stapp screaming "SEX!" Webvideo/{{Rocked}} [[https://youtu.be/PUNoDFrxlwM?t=7m46s had a field day laughing at how unexpected\unintentionally hilarious it is]], saying it ruins a mostly OK song.

* For those who don't have either their judgement clouded by NostalgiaFilter or are devotees of the NewRomantic era, pretty much every song by Music/{{Visage}} is this in ''spades''. As it turns out, having a [[WTHCastingAgency nightclub owner]] be the lead vocalist was a terrible idea, as Steve Strange ''can't sing''; his vocal range is [[DullSurprise as flat as a pancake]], and his slurred Welsh accent makes the lyrics [[TheUnintelligible neigh-incomprehensible]] to decipher. It helps that Music/MidgeUre wrote the admittedly-catchy melodies, but many listeners wish he sung the tracks as well due to his immense singing ability, making this Music/{{Ultravox}} & Music/{{Magazine}} side project a great case of TheyWastedAPerfectlyGoodCharacter (well, singer).

* Music/SetItOff's "Wolf in Sheep's Clothing" is an angry diatribe directed at someone for pretending to be nice while backstabbing people. It sounds like it was written (and sung) by an edgy teenager going through his emo phase, while trying to be clever and sophisticated by using--of all things--fairy tale and nursery rhyme references like "Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any soul? / No, sir, by the way, what the hell are morals?" and "Fee-fi-fo-fum, you better run and hide / I smell the blood of a petty little coward!"

* Deryck of Sum41:

** A lot of people assume that part of the Narm in "Whenever, Wherever" could be chalked up to her only just getting her footing with writing in English. However, "Ojos Asi" ("Eyes Like Yours") started the tradition back in Spanish. The verses dive into TrueArtIsIncomprehensible, with the most lucid line being "Crossed a river of salt/Just after I rode a ship that sunk in the desert" (If you take a river of salt as the ocean, but sand doesn't work that way.) The chorus turns the song into a gender-flipped version of Cinderella, with Shakira saying she traveled over the seven oceans... but later saying the came from Bahrain and got to Beirut (meaning the girl needs a globe and an abacus.) She says she's tearing down windows and doors (one or the other would suffice) and spends the entire time looking for someone with eyes like her lover's. It's an awesome song with great music, but when you sit down and really analyze the lyrics (in English or Spanish, since the lyrics were pretty faithfully translated), it gets downright narmy.

** "Before He Cheats" is a Narm[=/=]FridgeLogic sandwich (with a side of DoubleStandard -- any ''male'' singer performing this song would be lucky to ''just'' get his car trashed. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YYNQ8SOZYE Or maybe not.]]) It's a great revenge song if you're into that sort of thing; but, in her vandalism of her (ex)boyfriend's truck -- and she is quite thorough -- she carves her name in the bucket seats. Yes, she wants her boyfriend to know she did it ("maybe next time he'll think before he cheats"), but that would also let the authorities know...[[note]]She can claim the real vandal carved her name into the seat in order to frame her, but then why would she do something specifically to say "I did this to punish you for cheating on me" if she's just going to say "someone tried to frame me" later?[[/note]] The overwrought singing doesn't help. She's just too enthusiastic about this vandalism. Vandalism as retribution for adultery that ''she has no evidence he committed!'' Even the singer herself isn't sure; she keeps saying, "He's probably (insert PG-13-rated infidelity here)" and presents no hard evidence that he did anything wrong to begin with.

** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWZi_oR033Y This cover of Freya's theme from]] ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyIX'' by Italian musician Psamathes is good for the most part, but she overblows one of the lines a bit, making it sound more like "'''POWW'''-UHR MY '''SPIIAH''' HAD FOOR-'''GOT'''-TINN!" Not to mention the fact that she chose the most situational line in the song to emphasize, and while a major part of Freya's motivation in the game was her not wanting to be forgotten, it feels a bit like the cover is borderline-hamfistedly trying to hammer home who the song is about, as if she was worried about the ''fans'' forgetting about her rather than those she's close to. In addition, the singing style clashes a fair bit with Freya's quiet, stoic personality.
* Hamas has released two propaganda songs in Hebrew to scare Israelis, ‘Rock Israel’s Security’ and ‘We Shall Take the Zionist to the Gallows’. The problem is, not only is the IDF way better equipped and has far more manpower than Hamas does (making the threats a bit ridiculous), the singers in both songs sing with a very thick Arabic accent and the lyrics are in poorly written flowery Hebrew. The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-Ouqp-YI-A first song]] was bad enough to become a [[MemeticMutation memetic]] laughingstock in Israel, but the [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSvGbYUIaaM second one]] also has repeated use of AccentOnTheWrongSyllable, and the clip shows Israeli soldiers ''dancing''. To ''Music/GangnamStyle''.

%%** Billy Gilman's ''anything'' can qualify here, honestly. His entire output oozed {{Glurge}} to the point that if your grandmother was diagnosed with diabetes in the early 00's, there's an 80% chance his music is what did it.

** Yes, Metallica's 80's albums had plenty of this as well:

* Van Canto is an ''interesting'' band. They have a male singer, a female singer, a drummer, and a couple of backing singers that imitate instruments. So they'll do a cover of a [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCGQiGEYl4Y Nightwish song]] or a [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEwNrjvNiYs Metallica song,]] but instead of guitar and bass, there's a couple of dudes going "''RIDDLY DIDDLY DIDDLY DIDDLY''" ad nauseum. This makes for a very unique listening experience, to say the least.

** "Vienna" is very melodramatic, what with Midge's hammy vocals & the pretentious instrumentation. It's unsurprising some consider it either one of the 80's worst singles or it's best.

* "Shiny Shiny" by Music/HaysiFantayzee. The song is the 80's equivalent of "Disco Duck" - produced quickly to cash in on a trend (the blossoming New Wave era); annoyingly, almost perversely catchy, so bad that listening to nails on a chalkboard would be preferable. The lyrics are screamed, not sung, and the backing track is a bizarre combination of country music & synth-pop. In spite of all this, if you decipher some of the lyrics and watch the video, it's also supposed to be some sort of ProtestSong about nuclear war (e.g. "We ain't got a hope / press a button, it's all remote")[[https://youtu.be/8TDHNbcfwws Hear it here, if you dare!]]

* Martika's "Toy Soldiers". Quite possibly the funniest song of the 80's, thanks in no small part to Martika's gloriously over-the-top performance in the chorus.

* Music/IconaPop 'I Love It' contains several instances of the line 'I crashed my car into the bridge. I watched, I let it burn./I threw your shit into a bag and pushed it down the stairs./I crashed my car into the bridge./I don't care, I love it!'. So... you love repeatedly inflicting serious injuries on yourself? Okay...even with the fact that it's about angrily breaking up with an older boyfriend (hence the "you're from the 70's and I'm a 90's bitch" line) who "made things complicated", wouldn't you want to crash ''his'' car in a bridge instead of ''yours?''

* Creator/DavidHasselhoff's rendition of "Hooked on a Feeling" isn't too bad. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJQVlVHsFF8 The video]], on the other hand, consists almost entirely of The Hoff being superimposed over various pieces of stock footage by means of the laziest green screen technology that the mid-90's can buy. Highlights include Hasselhoff wearing a safari outfit and floating in front of a river where two random weiner dogs are standing while two little girls in angel costumes float out of the sky, Hasselhoff "flying" on a motorcycle, Hasselhoff wearing an eskimo suit and holding a fake fish in his mouth, and the grand finale where all of the random elements from throughout the video are combined in increasingly nonsensical ways.

** "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" is very narmy, especially when he makes a Doris Day reference (that most 80's kids didn't even get!)

* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSL0y5B6-I0 Boom Boom (Let's Back To My Room)]]" by Music/PaulLekakis. There's a reason it often ends up on "Worst Songs of All Time" lists. The backing track is a ClicheStorm of 80's synths, and "boom boom" [[UnusualEuphemism is used as an euphemism for]] an [[ShoutOut Afternoon Delight]] ([[LampshadedDoubleEntendre if ya know what I mean]]).

* Before Music/MidgeUre was in the highly successful band Music/{{Ultravox}} (which nonetheless is mentioned above), he was in the much less succesful group Music/{{Slik}}. Even by 70's pop standards, their songs were cornball as hell. [[https://youtu.be/4CMGHx865T4 Forever and Ever]] is quite possibly one of the cheesiest tracks from the 70's, with a dull, labourious chorus that sounds like Midge is singing through clenched teeth, thinking "Will the 80's ''come along already''?! I wanna work with [[Music/{{Visage}} Steve!]]"

* "The Northern Kings" are a band who do covers of various 1980's pop songs, turning these cheesy pop songs into epic rock songs. Of course, if you know/really like the original song then expect a fast paced rock version to be full of Narm, especially when they decided to do a heavy metal version of Kylie Minogue's "I Should Be So Lucky" (seriously).