History Main / Uncoffee

-->"Klingons have developed a way to make coffee particularly strong, both in flavour and in its effect as a stimulant, and it’s a very popular beverage. As a rule, coffee’s consumed plain - that is, black - but some Klingons prefer to mix other ingredients in with the coffee. If some kind of liquor is added to the coffee, the drink is called ra’taj. It’s said that the drink was originally nicknamed ra’wI’ taj (“commander’s knife,” suggestive of its potency), and that the name was shortened over time. In any event, ra’taj became one of the few Klingon foods to gain popularity outside the Empire, though in an altered form. Instead of containing liquor, as does the genuine Klingon ra’taj, the “export” version (which came to be pronounced in Federation Standard) consists of strong Klingon coffee plus a nutlike flavouring. Eventually, a new fashion developed - adding cream to the - and with this innovation came yet another name, , modelled after the name of another popular coffee drink, cappuccino. Raktajino is now served hot or iced, with or without extra cream, and with or without the rind of some fruit to add even more flavour. Though it’s sometimes called “Klingon coffee,” it’s quite different from both plain coffee and the alcoholic ra’taj.
** In the episode where the crew goes back in time to "The Trouble With Tribbles", Odo (in disguise) distractedly asks the waitress for raktajino and then clarifies that it is Klingon coffee. She replies that they don't serve Klingon food and drink, and that he's the second person to ask for it, cluing him in that fugitive Darvin has passed that way.

** Lack of real coffee becomes a real difficulty in ''Discworld/MonstrousRegiment'' thanks to a vampire using it as his [[AddictionDisplacement substitute for blood]]. The squad makes some out of acorns for him (which soldiers did often in RealLife, minus the necessity for keeping vampires on the wagon).
** In ''Discworld/MenAtArms'', Carrot orders a cup of acorn coffee at Gilmet's dwarf deli.

* Florence of ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}} enjoys drinking coffee even though it is mildly poisonous to her. A friend makes her a coffee substitute that smells like a frightened rabbit to her, but turns out to taste so bad that she ends up using coffee to scald the taste off her tongue, though it does do the job of waking her up like coffee, causing her to wonder how something could be so wrong and right at the same time.

* Fleegix, a watery, hot chocolate-like beverage that is made from the berries of the four zitzkis bushes that grow only on the summit of the mountain-city of Lenny in the existential plane of Waka-Waka and drunk out of ceremonial Lucite-handled thermal cups, shows up a lot in the sillier Creator/DanielPinkwater novels. Which is to say most of them.

* ''Literature/TheGeneral'': Raj Whitehall reflects that the Gubierno Civil's High Command can't function without "kave" from distant Azania.

* The Sand Kingdom in [[LightNovel/IsekaiShokudou Restaurant To Another World]]'' has a drink called cafa which can be drank hit or cooled with magic. The rest of the other world have never heard of coffee and visitors to the restaurant refer to it as a kind of tea.

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* The Sand Kingdom in [[LightNovel/IsekaiShokudou Restaurant To Another World]]'' has a drink called cafa which can be drank hit or cooled with magic. The rest of the other world have never heard of coffee and visitors to the restaurant refer to it as a kind of tea.
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** Mirrored by the North's lack of tobacco, and resulting in scouting parties from both armies being as likely to trade with one another as fight.

* Eastern European countries still drink grain coffee. There was all sorts of mock-foreign products, including faux chocolate. One of the party leaders advocated abandoning lemons in favor of the Sauerkraut - which has roughly the same vitamin C content. He changed his mind, when his wife prepared him some tea... with sauerkraut.

* "Fanfic/AenrhienVailiuri" has the Romulans quaffing a highly caffeinated bitter tea. Morgan flavors the recipe used on the ''Aen'rhien'' with khellid honey and spices (making it sort of like chai), but her tactical officer Sahuel complains that it's too sweet that way. Unfortunately, "replicated just tastes fake", so she's stuck. Jaleh Khoroushi, the Iranian ops officer and TokenHuman, {{lampshades}} it, thinking that it's funny how every species in the galaxy seems to have come up with some variation of a hot beverage with stimulant properties.

* After he runs out of real coffee, [[Determinator Mark]] [[MacGyvering Watney]] in ''Literature/TheMartian'' brews one of these diluting caffein pills in hot water.

* In the ''Literature/{{Dragaera}}'' series, coffee does exist, but most of the characters drink the specific variant of it known as ''klava'' (which is filtered through eggshells), and served with honey and cream. It's probably based on Hungarian egg coffee, because the Easterner culture is a FantasyCounterpartCulture to medieval Hungary.

* During UsefulNotes/TheAmericanRevolution, many colonists boycotted tea in protest of the British tax on it. Since tea was (at the time) a bit easier to come by than coffee, that's what they were used to...so they experimented with as many substitutes as possible, brewing "tea" from the barks and leaves of native trees and plants.

* In The Blitz, Britons had a similar problem with obtaining coffee (although [[SpotOfTea other drinks]] were more of a problem [[SeriousBusiness when they became unavailable]]). This may be the reason for the popularity of instant coffee in present day Britain. We've even invented varieties that don't taste unspeakably vile!

** Drinking hot Dr Pepper was an actual (short-lived) fad at the time.

->''"[Her son] hung over her shoulder and brought her continual mugs of strong black coffee. [[WriteWhatYouKnow This beverage began to appear in the books, too]]. The mutineer humans drank gav, while their law-abiding enemies quaffed chvi. Spacer aliens staggered from their nav-couches to gulp down kivay; and the mystics of Meld used xfy to induce an altered state of consciousness -- although this was not generally spotted as being the same substance. And it was all immensely popular."''

* Franchise/{{Emberverse}}: After technology (and, consequently, society) breaks down, real coffee becomes a rare and incredibly expensive luxury in most of North America. Several substitutes become fashionable among the younger generation, most notably chicory, which comes to be called "coffee" in some places. But many characters old enough to remember life before the Change eschew it, saying that it tastes just barely enough like the real thing to make them miss it all the more.

** Lack of real coffee becomes a real difficulty in ''Discworld/MonstrousRegiment'' thanks to a vampire using it as his [[AddictionDisplacement substitute for blood]]. The squad makes some out of acorns for him (which soldiers did often in RealLife, minus the the necessity for keeping vampires on the wagon).

* In ''[[Literature/KushielsLegacy Naamah's Kiss]]'' by JacquelineCarey, it is tremendously fashionable for D'Angeline nobles to drink ''khav'', which is described as a bitter drink from Jebe-Barkal (the FantasyCounterpartCulture of Ethiopia.)

** This is later {{Ret Con}}ned somewhat. There is also algae, and small shrimp grown in giant factory farms to add more variety. Real food (not made from soy) is eaten daily by middle class and higher. Soy food is the equivlent to modern-day processed foods. Only the really poor (And Shadowrunners needing to buy ammo) buy unprocessed soy.

* Chapter eleven of the {{Xenofiction}} WebSerialNovel ''[[http://hyperlit.adorobooks.com/treetops/?p=1 Treetops]]'' describes a beverage called ''"Chark"'', which is compared to both coffee and tea, and "other drinks that enjoy the same semi-cult status". It is a hot beverage made from boiled pollen that stimulates the spine and base brain tissue, increasing [[PsychicPowers available psychic energy]] and inducing a feeling of wellbeing. The more physical effects are likened to [[FantasticArousal an affectionate stroke on the ear.]]

* ''Fanfic/TheNextFrontier'' runs with [[TranslationConvention "a liquid it is convenient to call coffee"]].

* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' had an episode where Mrs. Krabappel offers Principal Skinner a cup of "coffee-flavoured beverine"; Skinner takes his "grey, with creamium". Presumably it's the same concept as the malk ("now with Vitamin R!") found in another episode: a poor, low-cost substitute that's all the school can afford.

* During the [[RedOctober Russian Civil War]], the exact same coffee substitutes were in use. There was even a brand of acorn coffee, "Zheludin" (lit. Acornine) that was marketed even after the hurdle was cleared, as a "healthy" coffee.

** In the ''StarTrekVanguard'' book ''Precipice'', Diego Reyes tries raktajino, and quickly concludes that it's ''nothing'' like coffee.

* A ''Magazine/{{Dragon}}'' article about food and drink in the ''TabletopGame/{{Greyhawk}}'' setting mentions kaffet, a bean grown in the Balkunish Basin (Oerth's FantasyCounterpartCulture Arabia) and made into a "bitter tonic" that promotes wakefulness.