History Main / TheAristocrats

Do not confuse with ''[[Disney/TheAristocats The Aristo]]'''[[Disney/TheAristocats cats]]'''''. '''[[BrainBleach PLEASE.]]''' [[note]]Humorously enough, the documentary has a segment in which comedians discuss [[FreudianSlip making that mistake]].[[/note]]

* Luigifan invokes the punchline, in similar fashion to ''WebVideo/WhatTheFuckIsWrongWithYou'' mentioned above, to [[LampshadeHanging lampshade]] an argument between Justin and Lydia (who are siblings) [[http://comments.deviantart.com/1/577188445/4220558505 during the "Growing Pains in the Neck" roleplay]] of ''Webcomic/WhiteDarkLife''. Notably, what he actually ''says'' is "'''Disney/TheAristocats!'''", but he does so on purpose [[PungeonMaster for the sake of a pun]] and as further lampshading of the argument (Lydia's boyfriend, who Justin [[MySisterIsOffLimits intensely dislikes and mistrusts]], is part-cat).

2) The comedian telling the joke describes the family's act in as much detail as they prefer. Sometimes, the father tells the agent a blow-by-blow description of the act, while other times, the family performs it live for the agent. The act ''always'' involves the family performing shocking, heinous, risqué, disgusting, and possibly even illegal acts.

* "1-Series/AdamTwelve, [[RealityEnsues see the talent agent at 9690 Wilshire Boulevard. Two-six-one suspects there now]]."
----

** Lydia, being an unabashed fangirl of the Film/DisneyAnimatedCanon (and pretty much everything Disney-related, for that matter), ''immediately'' thinks of the movie. Justin, on the other hand, immediately realizes what Luigifan is ''actually'' referencing, and is ''not'' pleased.

* In "Beach Games," ''[[Series/TheOfficeUS The Office]]'''s penultimate third season episode, Dwight attempts to tell this joke in what is more or less a FunnyBackgroundEvent -- since the audience's focus is on Pam doing the coal walk -- [[ItMakesSenseInContext in order to win Michael's job]]. He also [[ComicallyMissingThePoint completely misses the point of what makes the joke funny]]. [[SoUnfunnyItsFunny (Which is why it's so hilarious to the viewer.)]]

* ''WebVideo/HellsingUltimateAbridged'': When Abraham Van Hellsing confronts [[{{Dracula}} Alucard]] about his [[KillEmAll many]], ''[[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice many]]'' [[ComedicSociopath atrocities]], Alucard responds with this. Sir Hellsing is not amused and then proceeds to ram his stake threw Alucard's chest.

* In a short gag strip in ''Webcomic/GastroPhobia'', we see Gastro finishing telling the joke to a very angry Phobia. In the last panel we see Klepto bandaging Phobia's hand.

-->'''Count Maxwell:''' "So other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the show?"\\

-->'''Grandpa:''' Uh, this is no time to practice our act, Budgie!
-->'''Nostalgia Critic:''' ...'Kay, I don't want to know what kind of act requires her to pull his pants down...but it's probably called "The Aristocrats"!

-->'''Nostalgia Critic:''' Seriously, what woman -- especially seeing her daughter get eaten -- would take the time to raise her arms in the air and throw them down? You do that while telling a joke: "The Aristocrats"!

-->'''Count Maxwell:''' "So other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the show?"
-->'''Nostalgia Critic:''' Strange enough that there's a Lincoln assassination joke in this, but to have that classic followed up by crickets? Ain't none of you know good comedy! Hey Dracula, tell your version of "The Aristocrats"!

--> '''Dwight:''' And the talent agent says, "Describe your act." And the man says something really, really raunchy. And the town representative says, "What do you call yourselves?" And the man says, "The Aristocrats." ''([[{{Beat}} awkward silence]])'' [[AndThatsTerrible ...I mean truly repulsive acts.]]

-->'''Sir Hellsing:''' ''Vampire King''... You lay upon the blood soaked death of your ruined land, castles plundered, dominions in ruin, servants destroyed, all to end the hellfire with which you sought to cover the world. A bloody conquest having consumed ''hundreds of thousands'', countless villages ''razed'' to the ground, '''and over twenty thousand impaled and prostrated by you and you alone, to strike horror into the hearts of mortal men!''' WHAT SAY YOU!? MONSTER! DEMON! DEVIL CONCEIVED BY THE BLEAKEST WOMB! WHAT SAY YOU ''NOW''!?\\

* [[Podcast/WrecklessMediaRadio Brian Berris]] [[SubvertedTrope subverts this trope]]. In [[http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/aristocratjoke his version]], the act is incredibly tame and standard and the punch line is the offensive part.

* [[Podcast/WrecklessMediaRadio Brian Berris]] [[SubvertedTrope subverts this trope]]. In [[http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/aristocratjoke his version]], the act is incredibly tame and standard and the punch line is [[FantasticSlurs altered]].

'''Alucard:''' ...The Aristocrats.

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of. Extra risqué versions will also try to work in offensive political themes on top of everything, such as racism, blasphemy, sexism, homophobia, etc., into the performance (like the family insisting on including {{blackface}} and minstrel songs into the act).

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of. Extra risqué versions will also try to work in political themes, such as racism, blasphemy, sexism, homophobia, etc., into the performance (like the family insisting on including {{blackface}} and minstrel songs into the act).

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of. Extra risqué versions will also try to work in political themes, such as racism, blasphemy, sexism, homophobia, etc., into the performance (like the family insisting on including blackface and minstrel songs into the act).

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of. Extra risqué versions will also try to work in political themes, such as racism, blasphemy, homophobia, etc., into the performance.

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of. Extra risqué versions will also try to work in political themes, such as racism, blasphemy, and homophobia, into the performance.

In the past, the joke served as a form of satire about the upper class, but [[SeinfeldIsUnfunny that take doesn't really apply these days]]; in modern times, it's not particularly funny as a joke anymore (since it's essentially a ShaggyDogStory with a weak bit of irony as the punchline). The real point of the joke these days involves the description of the act itself: anyone who tells the joke must [[CrossesTheLineTwice cross the line as many times]] and in as many directions as humanly possible. Most comedians traditionally invent the act on the spot as they tell the joke, which turns it into an improv comedy exercise. Standard ingredients for the description of the act include [[IncestIsRelative incest]], [[PaedoHunt paedophilia]], [[BlackComedyRape rape]], death, [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]], coprophilia and urophilia [[note]]Getting turned on by shit and piss, respectively[[/note]], bodily fluids, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], and pretty much every vile sex act and fetish one can think of -- and every horrific act of violence, depravity, and otherwise immoral human behavior that nobody ''wants'' to think of.

-->'''Sir Hellsing''': Vampire King... You lay upon the blood soaked death of your ruined land, castles plundered, dominions in ruin, servants destroyed, all to end the hellfire with which you sought to cover the world. A bloody conquest having consumed hundreds of thousands, countless villages razed to the ground, '''and over twenty thousand impaled and prostrated by you and you alone, to strike horror into the hearts of mortal men!''' WHAT SAY YOU!? MONSTER! DEMON! DEVIL CONCEIVED BY THE BLEAKEST WOMB! WHAT SAY YOU ''NOW''!?
-->'''Alucard''': ...The Aristocrats...

* Creator/NataliePortman made an [[StylisticSuck intentionally lame]] attempt at this joke on ''Series/SaturdayNightLive''. Considering this is the same episode as her infamous [[CrowningMomentOfFunny rap video]], one can't help but wonder what it would be like if she really gave it a go.

* In one episode of ''LiveActionTV/TheOddCouple'', on a ShowWithinAShow Oscar is hosting, he announces an act called the Aristocrats, but we never actually see the act.

** Notably Creator/GilbertGottfried's [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGA0dIz9-Wk version from the Roast of Hugh Hefner]], which he'd done to ''recover'' from a TooSoon joke about "Miss[ing his] connecting flight at the World Trade Center". During the bit, after describing all manner of vile things, he finally draws the line [[spoiler:[[FelonyMisdemeanor at sweat involved in the act]]]].

3) At the completion of the description, the shocked agent can only ask what the family calls their act. The father proudly replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Comedians don't tell jokes. A proper joke seldom fits the format and atmosphere of stand-up comedy, and jokes end as soon as the audience knows the punchline.

* WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob said that ''Caligula'', being a big-budget mainstream porno film for those "craving the finest in bestiality and the finest in Shakespearean actors", was "like tracking down Laurence Olivier and asking him to perform The Aristocrats joke."

** Another notable rendition of the joke would be Creator/SarahSilverman's subversion in which she ditches the original punchline by referring to her fictional family troupe as ''The Aristocrats'' in the beginning, then going into detail describing how her family executed the eponymous routine (chiefly consisting of mutual masturbation) in a rather introspective manner while rehearsing under the watchful eyes of radio and TV host Joe Franklin but then faltering after a while while recounting how she was invited on Franklin's CastingCouch and closing with the line: [[spoiler: "''[[{{Beat}} (beat)]]'' [[RapeIsASpecialKindOfEvil Joe Franklin raped me..." ]]]]
* Website/ThatGuyWithTheGlasses did a nifty version.[[http://channelawesome.com/the-most-disturbing-aristocrats-joke-ever/ You can check it out here.]] Doug also held a contest on Website/YouTube to determine who could tell the best version of the joke. The winner was an overweight, bald, heavily tattooed man with the handle "Church of Dave," who describes an act climaxing in the souls of every evil person [[KarmicRape being raped by the souls of every good person]], which is called [[spoiler:Justice.]]

* Luigifan invokes the punchline, in similar fashion to ''WebVideo/WhatTheFuckIsWrongWithYou'' mentioned above, to [[LampshadeHanging lampshade]] an argument between Justin and Lydia (who are siblings). [[http://comments.deviantart.com/1/577188445/4220558505 during the "Growing Pains in the Neck" roleplay]] of ''Webcomic/WhiteDarkLife''. Notably, what he actually ''says'' is "'''Disney/TheAristocats!'''", but he does so on purpose [[PungeonMaster for the sake of a pun]] and as further lampshading of the argument (Lydia's boyfriend, who Justin [[MySisterIsOffLimits intensely dislikes and mistrusts]], is part-cat).

* When WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic reviewed ''WesternAnimation/FernGully2TheMagicalRescue'', there's a scene where Budgie accidentally pulls her grandfather's pants down, and he says it's no time to practice their act.
--->'''Critic''': ...Kay, I don't want to know what kind of act requires her to pull his pants down...But it's probably called THE ARISTOCRATS! *RimShot*

* Oancitizen of ''WebVideo/BrowsHeldHigh'' (quoting Phil Buni of ''TheBunnyPerspective'') compares the content of ''Film/ASerbianFilm'' to this joke. Instead of the usual punchline he delivers a very stern [[TrueArt "Art!"]]. ''*[[{{Beat}} beat]], [[TheStinger finger snap]]*''

* ''WebVideo/HellsingUltimateAbridged'': When Abraham Van Hellsing confronts [[{{Dracula}} Alucard]] about his [[KillEmAll many]], ''[[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice many]]'' [[ComedicSociopath atrocities]], Alucard responds with this.

--->'''Critic''': ...Kay, I don't want to know what kind of act requires her to pull his pants down. *beat* But it's probably called THE ARISTOCRATS! *RimShot*