History Main / TalksLikeASimile

A character who [[TitleDrop talks like a simile]] uses similes in their speech pattern the way a machine gun uses bullets: swiftly, mercilessly, and in quick succession, to the point where [[{{Metaphorgotten}} this quality becomes a prominent character trait]]. In a lot of these cases, [[SelfDemonstratingArticle the similes they use will be about as unusual as a school of fish in the Sahara and more complex than space shuttle wiring]], but still the offender will churn them out as they talk, either in casual conversation or in the narration, as though coming up with them as they go along was as natural an act to them as picking on AcceptableTargets.

* [[Literature/TheBible Jesus]] and his parables. [[AncientGreece Socrates]], too.

[[folder:Real Life]]
* Irish comedian Dylan Moran:
** [talking about 'The Rockafella Skank'] "I'm not saying it's a bad song. Or anything like that. I'm just saying that you could take a broom, dip it into brake fluid, put the other end up my arse and stick me on a trampoline in a moving lift and I would write a better song on the wall. That's all."
** [earlier] "This song sounded like a million fire engines being chased by ten million ambulances through a warzone and it was played at a volume that made the empty chair beside me bleed."
* Newscaster Dan Rather [[http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=125692&title=Election-Results---Dan-Rather was famous for this.]]
* [[Literature/TheBible Jesus]] and his parables. [[AncientGreece Socrates]], too.
* A stereotype of the DeepSouth.
[[/folder]]

* Given his time period, [[Franchise/SlyCooper Sly Cooper]]'s ancestor, Tennessee "The Kid" Cooper, is sure to say much of these anytime he's on screen.

* On ''WesternAnimaton/DocMcStuffins'', Hallie is full of unusual phrases that she pulls out at moment's notice.

* The entire cast of ''Franchise/MetalGear'', who [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic all talk exactly like]] Creator/HideoKojima.

** IntentionalEngrishForFunny-spewing Fawful in the handheld ''[[VideoGame/MarioAndLuigi Mario & Luigi]]'' games does it as well.

* [[WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw]] does this quite often, his similes being outrageous and bizarre, often to [[AccentuateTheNegative illustrate the negative aspect of the video games he reviews]]. He's mentioned insults being as offensive as "being smacked in the balls with your own dead dog," voice acting as unpleasant as "being raped in the ear by a man wearing a sandpaper condom," (but that was his roommate, and "not in those exact words, obviously") and [[SuperMarioBros Mario]] as "as big a sellout as a character can get without turning tricks for a penny on the New Jersey turnpike."

* The entire cast of ''Franchise/MetalGear'', who [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic all talk exactly like]] HideoKojima.

-->"At five minutes to eleven on the morning named he was at the station, a false beard and spectacles shielding his identity from the public eye. If you had asked him he would have said that he was a Scotch business man. As a matter a fact, he looked far more like a motor-car coming through a haystack."

* Massie Block from Literature/TheClique series continually uses "Are you an X? Then why are you ?"

* This device is very widely used in rap and hiphop while comparatively nonexistant in other genres.

* Irish Comedian Dylan Moran.

* Pete Wentz, lyricist of FallOutBoy is fond of this trope, to the point where it's in almost every song.

A staple of the PrivateEyeMonologue and of characters from the DeepSouth. Has some similarities with {{Dissimile}}. Also see StrangeSyntaxSpeaker, LikeIsLikeAComma. TruthInTelevision: there are many people who have this as a VerbalTic. In certain regions, like the Southern US, it borders on being a facet of the local dialect, [[AmericanAccents sure as a prickly pear's got spines.]]

* Invoked in ''Disney/TheFoxAndTheHound 2'' over and over again.

* Eilonwy of ''Literature/ChroniclesOfPrydain'' seasons this with a heavy dash of CloudCuckoolander.

* Literature/PhilipMarlowe, TropeCodifier for the PrivateEyeMonologue.

* Eddie Valiant in ''WhoCensoredRogerRabbit?'' by [[Creator/GaryWolf Gary K. Wolf]]. This quality did not carry over into [[Film/WhoFramedRogerRabbit the movie.]]

* The Script Assassin from ''KappaMikey''.
* TheTick, moreso in the cartoon than the comic book series.

* Maguro of ''SushiPack'' has a tendency to do this.

* FoghornLeghorn

* Creator/PGWodehouse definitely deserves a place here, as both Creator/DouglasAdams and StephenFry, who are both very adroit users of this trope, took their props from him.

A staple of the PrivateEyeMonologue and of characters from the DeepSouth. Has some similarities with {{Dissimile}}. Also see StrangeSyntaxSpeaker, LikeIsLikeAComma. TruthInTelevision: there are many people who have this as a VerbalTic. In certain regions, like the Southern US, it borders on being a facet of the local dialect, [[AmericanDialects sure as a prickly pear's got spines.]]

* The theme song of ''TabletopGame/{{FATAL}}'' was likened by one reviewer to the [[SesameStreet Cookie Monster]] chasing a drum kit being pushed down a flight of stairs.

* In the Music/{{Queen}} song "Don't Stop Me Now," Freddie Mercury compares himself to a shooting star, a tiger, a race car, Lady Godiva, a rocket ship on its way to Mars, a satellite, an atom bomb, and "a sex machine" (OK, maybe that last one [[MemeticSexGod isn't a simile]]).

* Beret Girl in ''[[WesternAnimation/AGoofyMovie An Extremely Goofy Movie]]'', introduced by performing a poem containing a series of similes for life, uses metaphors liberally in her common speech as well.

* Eilonwy of ''[[PrydainChronicles The Prydain Chronicles]]'' seasons this with a heavy dash of CloudCuckoolander.

* This trope is a staple of Dave Strider's vernacular in ''{{Homestuck}}''. Other characters also do this, but not to the same extent.

* [[CalvinAndHobbes Calvin]], when in character as Tracer Bullet.