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* One of [[WesternAnimation/{{Bunnicula}} Bunnicula's]] many [[LovecraftianSuperpower powers]] from sucking the juice out of [[VegetarianVampire vegetables]] includes draining an onion that causes his eyes to [[OcularGushers spray tears]] with the force of a fire-hose.
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* One of [[WesternAnimation/{{Bunnicula}} Bunnicula's]] ''[[WesternAnimation/{{Bunnicula}} Bunnicula's]]'' many [[LovecraftianSuperpower powers]] from sucking the juice out of [[VegetarianVampire vegetables]] includes draining an onion that onions causes his eyes to [[OcularGushers spray tears]] with the force of a fire-hose.fire-hose.
* In ''WesternAnimation/TheCupheadShow'', like in the video game the cartoon is based off of, Ollie the Onion cries a lot and when he does, he peels and causes everyone around him to cry as well.
* In ''WesternAnimation/TheCupheadShow'', like in the video game the cartoon is based off of, Ollie the Onion cries a lot and when he does, he peels and causes everyone around him to cry as well.
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* In episode 7 of Manga/MyDressUpDarling Kitagawa slices an onion while cooking and comments:
-->'''Kitagawa:''' My eyes are on fire. Screw you too, onions; damn. What did I ever do to you?
-->'''Kitagawa:''' My eyes are on fire. Screw you too, onions; damn. What did I ever do to you?
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* One of [[WesternAnimation/{{Bunnicula}} Bunnicula's]] many [[LovecraftianSuperpower powers]] from sucking the juice out of [[VegetarianVampire vegetables]] includes draining an onion that causes his eyes to [[OcularGushers spray tears]] with the force of a fire-hose.
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* The ''WesternAnimation/{{Beetlejuice}}'' episode "Recipe for Disaster" has Beetlejuice shed tears after a bunch of anthropomorphic vegetables explain their plight of being forced underground by Caesar Salad, then clarify that his eyes are watering because of the sentient onion among them.
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* OlderThanRadio: In Mme [=LePrince=] de Beaumont's "Literature/BeautyAndTheBeast", Beauty's sisters use OnionTears to emotionally blackmail her into staying home.
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* OlderThanRadio: In Mme [=LePrince=] de Beaumont's "Literature/BeautyAndTheBeast", Beauty's sisters use OnionTears onion tears to emotionally blackmail her into staying home.
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* ''WesternAnimation/TheCasagrandes'': The episode "Snack Pact" has the Casagrande family (except Rosa) learn about a food truck whose tamales are the best they've ever tasted. Knowing that Rosa [[GreenEyedMonster is bitterly jealous over anyone whose food supposedly tastes better than hers]], they decide to distract her while they get the tamales. Bobby's method of distracting Rosa is by chopping the onions for her. This results in him crying so hard his OnionTears overlap with InelegantBlubbering (OcularGushers, loud sobbing, red eyes, runny nose, the works!). His face is still stained with tears when he dials in his cousin Carlota.
* The ''WesternAnimation/TUFFPuppy'' episode "Snap Dad" has a bit where Dudley's mother is crying over the phone and turns out to be doing so because she's cutting onions.
* The ''WesternAnimation/TUFFPuppy'' episode "Snap Dad" has a bit where Dudley's mother is crying over the phone and turns out to be doing so because she's cutting onions.
to:
* ''WesternAnimation/TheCasagrandes'': The episode "Snack Pact" has the Casagrande family (except Rosa) learn about a food truck whose tamales are the best they've ever tasted. Knowing that Rosa [[GreenEyedMonster is bitterly jealous over anyone whose food supposedly tastes better than hers]], they decide to distract her while they get the tamales. Bobby's method of distracting Rosa is by chopping the onions for her. This results in him crying so hard his OnionTears onion tears overlap with InelegantBlubbering (OcularGushers, loud sobbing, red eyes, runny nose, the works!). His face is still stained with tears when he dials in his cousin Carlota.
* The''WesternAnimation/TUFFPuppy'' ''WesternAnimation/TUFFPuppy''
** The episode "Snap Dad" has a bit where Dudley's mother is crying over the phone and turns out to be doing so because she's cuttingonions.onions.
** The gag of a character getting teary-eyed from cutting onions is used again by Keswick and Dudley in "Puppy Unplugged".
* The
** The episode "Snap Dad" has a bit where Dudley's mother is crying over the phone and turns out to be doing so because she's cutting
** The gag of a character getting teary-eyed from cutting onions is used again by Keswick and Dudley in "Puppy Unplugged".
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* The ''WesternAnimation/TUFFPuppy'' episode "Snap Dad" has a bit where Dudley's mother is crying over the phone and turns out to be doing so because she's cutting onions.
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* A mother and daughter are making dinner, the former carving chicken and the latter peeling several onions... and getting teary-eyed all over. \\
"Why don't you try peeling them in water? You won't get the fumes in your eyes." the mother suggests. The daughter seems to get it and start filling a wash basin with water, but just then the phone in the hall started ringing. \\
The mother leaves the kitchen, had a lengthy conversation, comes back fifteen minutes later... and finds the daughter soaking wet in the face, hair, and totally out of breath. \\
"You're right, mom, it works!..." the daughter said. "But the problem is, it's so ''hard'' peeling them [[ComicallyMissingThePoint when your head's underwater]]!"
"Why don't you try peeling them in water? You won't get the fumes in your eyes." the mother suggests. The daughter seems to get it and start filling a wash basin with water, but just then the phone in the hall started ringing. \\
The mother leaves the kitchen, had a lengthy conversation, comes back fifteen minutes later... and finds the daughter soaking wet in the face, hair, and totally out of breath. \\
"You're right, mom, it works!..." the daughter said. "But the problem is, it's so ''hard'' peeling them [[ComicallyMissingThePoint when your head's underwater]]!"
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* A recurring character in the ''VideoGame/CookieRun'' games is Onion Cookie, a young girl cookie who cries when she's scared... and because her tears are made of onion juice, once she starts crying, she can't stop.
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** In ''''VideoGame/PuyoPuyoChronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
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** In ''''VideoGame/PuyoPuyoChronicle'', ''VideoGame/PuyoPuyoChronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
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* This happens twice in the ''VideoGame/PuyoPuyo'' series, usually caused by the onion-headed Onion Pixie:
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* This happens twice in the ''VideoGame/PuyoPuyo'' series, usually both instances being caused by the onion-headed Onion Pixie:
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** In ''Chronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
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** In ''Chronicle'', ''''VideoGame/PuyoPuyoChronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
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* ''WesternAnimation/LittlestPetShop2012'': In "Two Peas in a Podcast" when Penny Ling thinks she's being banished from the petshop, this leads to EverybodyCries; then Mrs. Twombly enters, crying from a raw onion, causing everyone to cry harder.
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* Exploited in ''Literature/TheAdventuresOfHershelOfOstropol'', when Hershel is getting his wife to [[FakingTheDead pretend to be dead]] so their family will get food and money for the funeral. The only food they have left in the house is a small onion, which he cuts open and rubs on his eyes to make them cry before telling the village what's happened.
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** In Sig's [=WakuWaku=] course in '' Puyo Puyo Fever 2'', Sig will remark that "That onion made me cry" after defeating him.
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** In Sig's [=WakuWaku=] course in '' Puyo Puyo Fever 2'', ''VideoGame/PuyoPuyoFever2'', Sig will remark that "That onion made me cry" after defeating him.
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** In a ParodyEpisode of StarWars, the characters try to find Plucky by inserting one of his feathers into their rocket's computer. However, it starts tickling the computer making their rocket go out of control, so the gang have to peel onions in order to make it cry and go back to normal.
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** In a ParodyEpisode of StarWars, Franchise/StarWars, the characters try to find Plucky by inserting one of his feathers into their rocket's computer. However, it starts tickling the computer making their rocket go out of control, so the gang have to peel onions in order to make it cry and go back to normal.
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* In ''Julie & Julia'', Julia Child is practicing cutting onions. Her husband Paul walks into their kitchen and immediately tears up, starts wiping his eyes, and hurries out of the room.
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* In ''Julie & Julia'', ''Film/JulieAndJulia'', Julia Child is practicing cutting onions. Her husband Paul walks into their kitchen and immediately tears up, starts wiping his eyes, and hurries out of the room.
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[[folder:Music]]
* Referenced by way of a {{pun}} in "Vidalia" by Music/SammyKershaw. The title female in the song gains her [[WhoNamesTheirKidDude unusual name]] as a {{portmanteau}} of her parents Violet and Dale. As Vidalia is also a type of onion, this then sets up the title lyric "Sweet Vidalia, you always gotta make me cry".
[[/folder]]
* Referenced by way of a {{pun}} in "Vidalia" by Music/SammyKershaw. The title female in the song gains her [[WhoNamesTheirKidDude unusual name]] as a {{portmanteau}} of her parents Violet and Dale. As Vidalia is also a type of onion, this then sets up the title lyric "Sweet Vidalia, you always gotta make me cry".
[[/folder]]
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* Onion Oni from ''{{Franchise/Anpanman}}'' has managed to weaponize this. He tosses onions and uses his kanabo to peel and slice them by whacking at them. The onion slices then land on the eyes of his victim (normally Baikinman in this case). Also, Onion Oni himself (his head's an actual onion, with two sprouts acting as his horns) is a bit of a crybaby (he's still a little boy, but he doesn't like being seen as just a kid).
to:
* Onion Oni from ''{{Franchise/Anpanman}}'' ''Literature/{{Anpanman}}'' has managed to weaponize this. He tosses onions and uses his kanabo to peel and slice them by whacking at them. The onion slices then land on the eyes of his victim (normally Baikinman in this case). Also, Onion Oni himself (his head's an actual onion, with two sprouts acting as his horns) is a bit of a crybaby (he's still a little boy, but he doesn't like being seen as just a kid).
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* In the ''Literature/AntAndBee'' book ''More and more Ant and Bee'', a child's nurse cries from cutting onions, to the astonishment of Ant and Bee, that a "big person" should cry. She has to be cheered up.
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* ''Manga/{{Beastars}}: Jack uses onions to force himself to cry because he think it is wrong that the disturbing information he learns about the world's history doesn't make him cry due to his species being engineered to not feel strong emotions.
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* ''Manga/{{Beastars}}: ''Manga/{{Beastars}}'': Jack uses onions to force himself to cry because he think it is wrong that the disturbing information he learns about the world's history doesn't make him cry due to his species being engineered to not feel strong emotions.
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* ''Manga/{{Beastars}}: Jack uses onions to force himself to cry because he think it is wrong that the disturbing information he learns about the world's history doesn't make him cry due to his species being engineered to not feel strong emotions.
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[[caption-width-right:350:"Hey, who left this bowl of onions here?"]]
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* In ''[[Literature/Lyra Caught in Crystal]]'', RetiredBadass innkeeper Kayl grabs a knife and some onions to mask her tears over painful memories. Later, her young son is telling the inn patrons not to get the stew, because [[BrickJoke he saw how many onions his mother was cutting for it]].
to:
* In ''[[Literature/Lyra ''[[Literature/{{Lyra}} Caught in Crystal]]'', RetiredBadass innkeeper Kayl grabs a knife and some onions to mask her tears over a painful memories.memory. Later, her young son is telling the inn patrons not to get the stew, because [[BrickJoke he saw how many onions his mother was cutting for it]].
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* In ''[[Literature/Lyra Caught in Crystal]]'', RetiredBadass innkeeper Kayl grabs a knife and some onions to mask her tears over painful memories. Later, her young son is telling the inn patrons not to get the stew, because [[BrickJoke he saw how many onions his mother was cutting for it]].
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* The ''WesternAnimation/XiaolinShowdown'' episode "Hear Some Evil See Some Evil" has the monks with tears in their eyes the night after they eavesdrop on each others thoughts with the newest Shen Gong Wu, only for it to be [[BaitAndSwitch because they are chopping onions]].
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* The ''WesternAnimation/XiaolinShowdown'' episode "Hear Some Evil See Some Evil" has the monks with tears in their eyes the night after they eavesdrop on each others other's thoughts with the newest Shen Gong Wu, only for it to be [[BaitAndSwitch because they are chopping onions]].
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*''WesternAnimation/TheCasagrandes'': The episode "Snack Pact" has the Casagrande family (except Rosa) learn about a food truck whose tamales are the best they've ever tasted. Knowing that Rosa [[GreenEyedMonster is bitterly jealous over anyone whose food supposedly tastes better than hers]], they decide to distract her while they get the tamales. Bobby's method of distracting Rosa is by chopping the onions for her. This results in him crying so hard his OnionTears overlap with InelegantBlubbering (OcularGushers, loud sobbing, red eyes, runny nose, the works!). His face is still stained with tears when he dials in his cousin Carlota.
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* The Creator/DiCEntertainment version of ''WesternAnimation/GIJoeARealAmericanHero'' had this happen in the episode "Cobra Land", where Cobra Commander makes the Joes look bad by lying that he's a changed man and wishes to make up for his previous crimes. As part of his sympathy act, Cobra Commander eats an onion to simulate tears.
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* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSmurfs'' episode "Crying Smurfs", Papa Smurf's fomula accdiently spilled on an onion. When Greedy about to cut an onion to slices for his salad, a strong smell comes up to his eyes - causing him to start crying. Later, Smurfette and other smurfs (except Hefty and Papa) started crying after having the salad, caused the village [[OcularGushers flooded with tears]].
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* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSmurfs'' episode "Crying Smurfs", Papa Smurf's fomula accdiently spilled on an onion. When Greedy is about to cut an onion to slices for his salad, a strong smell comes up to his eyes - causing him to start crying. Later, Smurfette and other smurfs (except Hefty and Papa) started crying after having the salad, caused the village [[OcularGushers flooded with tears]].
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* In his [=WakuWaku=] course in ''[[VideoGame/PuyoPuyo Puyo Puyo Fever 2]]'', Sig faces off against the onion-headed Onion Pixie as his first opponent. Upon defeating him, Sig says "That onion made me cry."
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* This happens twice in the ''VideoGame/PuyoPuyo'' series, usually caused by the onion-headed Onion Pixie:
** Inhis Sig's [=WakuWaku=] course in ''[[VideoGame/PuyoPuyo '' Puyo Puyo Fever 2]]'', 2'', Sig faces off against the onion-headed Onion Pixie as his first opponent. Upon defeating him, Sig says will remark that "That onion made me cry."cry" after defeating him.
** In ''Chronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
** In
** In ''Chronicle'', as the party makes their way through the Color Tower, they all get assaulted by an oniony stench making their eyes tear up. Surely enough, Onion Pixie is also nearby.
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[[quoteright:350:[[WesternAnimation/SpongebobSquarepants https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/squidward_onions.jpg]]]]
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[[folder:Advertisements]]
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[[folder:Films -- Animated]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekFourD'' (the UsefulNotes/ThreeDMovie that plays at Ride/UniversalStudios), newlywed Fiona is crying because her carriage is an onion. It's also referenced in the original ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}'' movie during the "ogres are like onions" scene -- Donkey suggests, "They make you cry!" as one of the possible connections.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Pinocchio}}'', Stromboli takes a bite of an onion and talks close to Pinocchio giving him tears.
* In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekFourD'' (the UsefulNotes/ThreeDMovie that plays at Ride/UniversalStudios), newlywed Fiona is crying because her carriage is an onion. It's also referenced in the original ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}'' movie during the "ogres are like onions" scene -- Donkey suggests, "They make you cry!" as one of the possible connections.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Pinocchio}}'', Stromboli takes a bite of an onion and talks close to Pinocchio giving him tears.
to:
* ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'':
-->'''Calvin:''' Why are you crying, Mom?\\
'''Mom:''' I'm cutting up an onion.\\
'''Calvin:''' ''[to audience]'' It must be hard to cook when you anthropomorphize your vegetables.
* In
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Kudzu}}'' sequence parodying Jimmy Swaggart's prostitution scandal, Reverend Will B. Dunn started crying
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Pinocchio}}'', Stromboli takes a bite of an onion and talks close to Pinocchio giving him tears.
[[folder:Films -- Animation]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekFourD'' (the UsefulNotes/ThreeDMovie that plays at Ride/UniversalStudios), newlywed Fiona is crying because her carriage is an onion. It's also referenced in the original ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}'' movie during the "ogres are like onions" scene -- Donkey suggests, "They make you cry!" as one of the possible connections.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Pinocchio}}'', Stromboli takes a bite of an onion and talks close to Pinocchio giving him tears.
[[/folder]]
* In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekFourD'' (the UsefulNotes/ThreeDMovie that plays at Ride/UniversalStudios), newlywed Fiona is crying because her carriage is an onion. It's also referenced in the original ''WesternAnimation/{{Shrek}}'' movie during the "ogres are like onions" scene -- Donkey suggests, "They make you cry!" as one of the possible connections.
* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Pinocchio}}'', Stromboli takes a bite of an onion and talks close to Pinocchio giving him tears.
[[/folder]]
[[folder:Jokes]]
* A [[BlackComedy dead baby joke]] runs thus: What's the difference between a baby and an onion? [[spoiler:You don't cry when you cut up a baby.]] Also applies to bagpipes, accordions, and violas.
* An unrelated joke actually inverts this trope: ''You are so ugly you made an onion cry.''
[[/folder]]
* A [[BlackComedy dead baby joke]] runs thus: What's the difference between a baby and an onion? [[spoiler:You don't cry when you cut up a baby.]] Also applies to bagpipes, accordions, and violas.
* An unrelated joke actually inverts this trope: ''You are so ugly you made an onion cry.''
[[/folder]]
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[[folder:Live Action TV]]
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[[folder:Newspaper Comics]]
* ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'':
-->'''Calvin''': Why are you crying, Mom?\\
'''Mom''': I'm cutting up an onion.\\
'''Calvin''': ''[to audience]'' It must be hard to cook when you anthropomorphize your vegetables.
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Mafalda}}'' comic strip, Mafalda's mother is tearing up while peeling onions, and her precocious child (who is always worried about the situation of the world) brings her a terrestrial globe "so that she can cry for something more altruistic than an onion".
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Kudzu}}'' sequence parodying Jimmy Swaggart's prostitution scandal, Reverend Will B. Dunn started crying on his show. The last frame revealed that he was using this method.
* ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'':
-->'''Calvin''': Why are you crying, Mom?\\
'''Mom''': I'm cutting up an onion.\\
'''Calvin''': ''[to audience]'' It must be hard to cook when you anthropomorphize your vegetables.
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Mafalda}}'' comic strip, Mafalda's mother is tearing up while peeling onions, and her precocious child (who is always worried about the situation of the world) brings her a terrestrial globe "so that she can cry for something more altruistic than an onion".
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Kudzu}}'' sequence parodying Jimmy Swaggart's prostitution scandal, Reverend Will B. Dunn started crying on his show. The last frame revealed that he was using this method.
to:
* ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'':
-->'''Calvin''': Why are you crying, Mom?\\
'''Mom''': I'm cutting up an onion.\\
'''Calvin''': ''[to audience]'' It must be hard to cook when you anthropomorphize your vegetables.
* In
* In a ''ComicStrip/{{Kudzu}}'' sequence parodying Jimmy Swaggart's prostitution scandal,
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[[folder:Oral Tradition]]
* A [[BlackComedy dead baby joke]] runs thus: What's the difference between a baby and an onion? [[spoiler:You don't cry when you cut up a baby.]] Also applies to bagpipes, accordions, and violas.
* An unrelated joke actually inverts this trope: ''You are so ugly you made an onion cry.''
* A [[BlackComedy dead baby joke]] runs thus: What's the difference between a baby and an onion? [[spoiler:You don't cry when you cut up a baby.]] Also applies to bagpipes, accordions, and violas.
* An unrelated joke actually inverts this trope: ''You are so ugly you made an onion cry.''
to:
*
* An unrelated joke actually inverts this trope: ''You are so ugly you made an onion cry.''
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[[folder:Podcasts]]
* In ''Podcast/TheHiddenAlmanac'', one of the history moments concerns an art work titled "Eleven Hundred Small Bits of Onion". Reverend Mord recalls that it was "reported to be a success, as no one could view it without bursting into tears, although some art critics suggested that this method was probably cheating."
* In ''Podcast/TheHiddenAlmanac'', one of the history moments concerns an art work titled "Eleven Hundred Small Bits of Onion". Reverend Mord recalls that it was "reported to be a success, as no one could view it without bursting into tears, although some art critics suggested that this method was probably cheating."
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*
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[[folder:Radio]]
* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'': In the episode "Tears for Mr. Boynton," Mrs. Davis advises Miss Brooks that she has to appear more vulnerable to attract Mr. Boynton. Davis hides onions in Miss Brooks' purse. In fact, the sobbing Miss Brooks is very successful in getting sympathy from Mr. Conklin and Walter Denton. She even gets Mr. Boynton [[SeriesGoal to propose]] . . . [[FailureistheOnlyOption almost.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder:Toys]]
* ''Toys/TheTrashPack'', ''Toys/{{Shopkins}}'', and ''Toys/TheGrosseryGang'', three toylines from Moose Toys that share connected universes, all have a crying onion character (Smelly Onion, Boo-Hoo Onion, and Onion Scum and Smelly Onion, respectively).
[[/folder]]
* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'': In the episode "Tears for Mr. Boynton," Mrs. Davis advises Miss Brooks that she has to appear more vulnerable to attract Mr. Boynton. Davis hides onions in Miss Brooks' purse. In fact, the sobbing Miss Brooks is very successful in getting sympathy from Mr. Conklin and Walter Denton. She even gets Mr. Boynton [[SeriesGoal to propose]] . . . [[FailureistheOnlyOption almost.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder:Toys]]
* ''Toys/TheTrashPack'', ''Toys/{{Shopkins}}'', and ''Toys/TheGrosseryGang'', three toylines from Moose Toys that share connected universes, all have a crying onion character (Smelly Onion, Boo-Hoo Onion, and Onion Scum and Smelly Onion, respectively).
[[/folder]]
[[folder:Web Animation]]
* ''WebAnimation/ChallengeToWin'' had a character in its second season named Onion, who is ProneToTears and cries about ''anything''.
[[/folder]]
* ''WebAnimation/ChallengeToWin'' had a character in its second season named Onion, who is ProneToTears and cries about ''anything''.
[[/folder]]
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[[folder:Web Original]]Videos]]
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* ''WebAnimation/ChallengeToWin'' had a character in its second season named Onion, who is ProneToTears and cries about ''anything''.
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* ''WesternAnimation/TinyToonAdventures''
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* ''WesternAnimation/TinyToonAdventures''''WesternAnimation/TinyToonAdventures'':
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* In his [=WakuWaku=] course in ''[[VideoGame/PuyoPuyo Puyo Puyo Fever 2]]'', Sig faces off against the onion-headed Onion Pixie as his first opponent. Upon defeating him, Sig says "That onion made me cry."
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In RealLife, if the onions are green or very fresh, they can produce the copious tears, often accompanied by sniffing (because your tear ducts and nasal tubes are connected), but not the sobbing (although sometimes, the tears and sniffling can make you congested, forcing you to breathe through your mouth and send you even one step closer to the appearance of sobbing.)
to:
In RealLife, if the onions are green or very fresh, especially if cut very close to the root end, they can produce the copious tears, often accompanied by sniffing (because your tear ducts and nasal tubes are connected), but not the sobbing (although sometimes, the tears and sniffling can make you congested, forcing you to breathe through your mouth and send you even one step closer to the appearance of sobbing.)