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This is becoming rare in real romances, which are beginning to eschew floweriness for prose that's either [[DarkerAndEdgier more direct, even crass,]] or else naturalist, down-to-earth, and maybe even funny. However, Mills and Boon Prose lives on in parodies, often used to invoke InnocentInnuendo. It also occurs in {{fictional document}}s as a form of StylisticSuck. Can involve AnatomicallyImpossibleSex. If a character uses this trope in first-person narration, that goes under ThinksLikeARomanceNovel.
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This is becoming rare in real romances, which are beginning to eschew floweriness for prose that's either [[DarkerAndEdgier more direct, even crass,]] or else naturalist, else down-to-earth, and maybe even funny. However, Mills and Boon Prose lives on in parodies, often used to invoke InnocentInnuendo. It also occurs in {{fictional document}}s as a form of StylisticSuck. Can involve AnatomicallyImpossibleSex. If a character uses this trope in first-person narration, that goes under ThinksLikeARomanceNovel.
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The traditional way of handling sex in a RomanceNovel; PurpleProse to IKEAErotica's BeigeProse. Physical actions and sensations are conveyed via vague euphemisms or even overblown metaphors - while emotions are described in excessive, abstract PurpleProse. Often one suspects that the writer wishes ''they'' were participating in the scene. A sure sign that you've got one of these is when [[TheBodyPartsThatMustNotBeNamed abstract nouns are used to refer to genitalia]].
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The traditional way of handling sex in a RomanceNovel; PurpleProse to IKEAErotica's BeigeProse. Physical actions and sensations are conveyed via vague euphemisms or even overblown metaphors - while --while emotions are described in excessive, abstract PurpleProse. Often one suspects that the writer wishes ''they'' were participating in the scene. A sure sign that you've got one of these is when [[TheBodyPartsThatMustNotBeNamed abstract nouns are used to refer to genitalia]].
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There's no "the" in the book's title, it's just Watermelon.
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* The sex scenes between Claire and Adam in ''The Watermelon'' by Creator/MarianKeyes.
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* The sex scenes between Claire and Adam in ''The Watermelon'' ''Watermelon'' by Creator/MarianKeyes.
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* ''Fanfic/{{Stray}}'' uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
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* ''Fanfic/{{Stray}}'' ''Fanfic/{{Stray|Dahne}}'' uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
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* ''Literature/ACourtOfThornsAndRoses'': It's not so present in the first book, but the sex scenes become increasingly loaded with grandiose metaphors and descriptors.
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-->-- [[Webcomic/IrregularWebcomic Irregular Podcast! #13]], "The Complete Works of Western Literature"
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-->-- [[Webcomic/IrregularWebcomic [[Podcast/IrregularPodcast Irregular Podcast! #13]], "The Complete Works of Western Literature"
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* ''Webcomic/EverydayHeroes'': Dinah Might writes her VillainousCrush on Mr. Mighty into her romance novel in [[https://eheroes.thecomicseries.com/comics/414 a scene]] where she imagines the hero capturing and having his way with her.
--> Dinah gasped as Mr. Mighty's hands roughly groped her, then his fingers hooked the neckline of her leotard. Under his super-powered hands, the reinforced fabric tore like tissue paper....
--> Dinah gasped as Mr. Mighty's hands roughly groped her, then his fingers hooked the neckline of her leotard. Under his super-powered hands, the reinforced fabric tore like tissue paper....
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[[folder:Anime]]
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[[folder:Film]]
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[[folder:LiveActionTV]]
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This is becoming rare in real romances, which are beginning to eschew floweriness for [[DarkerAndEdgier harder-edged]] (and sometimes downright vulgar) prose. However, Mills and Boon Prose lives on in parodies, often used to invoke InnocentInnuendo. It also occurs in {{fictional document}}s as a form of StylisticSuck. Can involve AnatomicallyImpossibleSex. If a character uses this trope in first-person narration, that goes under ThinksLikeARomanceNovel.
to:
This is becoming rare in real romances, which are beginning to eschew floweriness for prose that's either [[DarkerAndEdgier harder-edged]] (and sometimes downright vulgar) prose.more direct, even crass,]] or else naturalist, down-to-earth, and maybe even funny. However, Mills and Boon Prose lives on in parodies, often used to invoke InnocentInnuendo. It also occurs in {{fictional document}}s as a form of StylisticSuck. Can involve AnatomicallyImpossibleSex. If a character uses this trope in first-person narration, that goes under ThinksLikeARomanceNovel.
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* ''LightNovel/{{R15}}'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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* ''LightNovel/{{R15}}'': ''Literature/{{R15}}'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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* {{Exaggerated|Trope}} InUniverse in ''LightNovel/AscendanceOfABookworm'': Like many aspects of noble society, Ehrenfest's romance novels are laden in implication and euphemism, with ''any'' sort of intimacy resulting in the story [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment suddenly getting so abstract and surreal that Myne can't even tell what's going on]] (she compares the writing style to that of UsefulNotes/{{Bollywood}} musicals). When Myne tries to write a romance novel of her own, Ferdinand blasts it as "degenerate filth" and bans her from ever publishing it... because she was bold enough to directly describe the characters ''touching'' each other.
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* {{Exaggerated|Trope}} InUniverse in ''LightNovel/AscendanceOfABookworm'': ''Literature/AscendanceOfABookworm'': Like many aspects of noble society, Ehrenfest's romance novels are laden in implication and euphemism, with ''any'' sort of intimacy resulting in the story [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment suddenly getting so abstract and surreal that Myne can't even tell what's going on]] (she compares the writing style to that of UsefulNotes/{{Bollywood}} musicals). When Myne tries to write a romance novel of her own, Ferdinand blasts it as "degenerate filth" and bans her from ever publishing it... because she was bold enough to directly describe the characters ''touching'' each other.
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* ''Series/ManhattanLoveStory'': Dana has to edit a "light porn" novel that's full of turgid phrases. With the help of the other characters she manages to edit it into something better.
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* {{Exaggerated|Trope}} InUniverse in ''LightNovel/AscendanceOfABookworm'': Like many aspects of noble society, Ehrenfest's romance novels are laden in implication and euphemism, with ''any'' sort of intimacy resulting in the story [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment suddenly getting so abstract and surreal that Myne can't even tell what's going on]] (she compares the writing style to that of UsefulNotes/{{Bollywood}} musicals). When Myne tries to write a romance novel of her own, Ferdinand blasts it as "degenerate filth" and bans her from ever publishing it... because she was bold enough to directly describe the characters ''touching'' each other.
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* ''Fanfic/ImpenetrableWalls'' being a ''Chinese'' Palace Drama, a man wouldn't do something as vulgar as shoving his penis into his partner's hole. No, he will sheathe his jade stalk into his partner to make her flower bloom and fill her cauldron with his yang energy. Such flowery descriptions actually ''prevent'' Wei Wuxian to understand the Imperial Brother wishes to sleep with him, as everyone just keep couching it in poetic euphemisms he cannot understand.
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* ''LightNovel/R15'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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* ''LightNovel/R15'': ''LightNovel/{{R15}}'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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* ''LightNovel/{{R 15}}'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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* ''LightNovel/{{R 15}}'': ''LightNovel/R15'': The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, [[MostWritersAreWriters in a light novel that does this just as often]].
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[[folder:Fan Fic]]
* ''FanFic/{{Stray}}'' uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
* ''FanFic/{{Stray}}'' uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
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[[folder:Fan Fic]]
Works]]
*''FanFic/{{Stray}}'' ''Fanfic/{{Stray}}'' uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
*
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* ''FanFic/SpacedustAndChaosARequiem''. There's shagging going on but [[PurpleProse it's kind of hard to tell]].
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* ''FanFic/SpacedustAndChaosARequiem''. ''Spacedust And Chaos: A Requiem''. There's shagging going on in this ''Evangelion'' smut fic but [[PurpleProse it's kind of hard to tell]].
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* Every single line of ''FanFic/MyInnerLife'' that is not BeigeProse or CostumePorn.
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* Every single line of ''FanFic/MyInnerLife'' ''Fanfic/MyInnerLife'' that is not BeigeProse or CostumePorn.
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* An early episode of ''Series/{{Friends}}'' has Rachel attempt to write some ("Do you think his 'love stick' can be liberated from its 'denim prison'?"), inspired by Chandler's mother, who writes them professionally. [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar Luckily for the broadcasters]], she's a [[RougeAnglesOfSatin terrible speller]] so the others can openly mock her typos; the female character is apparently in possession of "heaving beasts", while the man at one point whips out his "huge throbbing pens".
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* An early episode of ''Series/{{Friends}}'' has Rachel attempt to write some ("Do you think his 'love stick' can be liberated from its 'denim prison'?"), inspired by Chandler's mother, who writes them professionally. [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar Luckily for the broadcasters]], broadcasters, she's a [[RougeAnglesOfSatin terrible speller]] so the others can openly mock her typos; the female character is apparently in possession of "heaving beasts", while the man at one point whips out his "huge throbbing pens".
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* ''Fanfic/ForbidenFruitTheTempationOfEdwardCullen'': MANCARROT. Which is ''still'' a nicer choice of words than calling Edward's penis a "throbbing lavender man-fruit thing" and Jacob's a ""horrible wet mushroom"!
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* ''Fanfic/ForbidenFruitTheTempationOfEdwardCullen'': MANCARROT. Which is ''still'' a nicer choice of words than calling Edward's penis a "throbbing lavender man-fruit thing" and Jacob's a ""horrible "horrible wet mushroom"!
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The traditional way of handling sex in a RomanceNovel; PurpleProse to IKEAErotica's BeigeProse. Physical actions and sensations are conveyed via vague euphemisms or even overblown metaphors - while emotions are described in excessive, abstract PurpleProse. Often one suspects that the writer wishes ''they'' were participating in the scene. A sure sign that you've got one of these is when abstract nouns are used to refer to genitalia.
to:
The traditional way of handling sex in a RomanceNovel; PurpleProse to IKEAErotica's BeigeProse. Physical actions and sensations are conveyed via vague euphemisms or even overblown metaphors - while emotions are described in excessive, abstract PurpleProse. Often one suspects that the writer wishes ''they'' were participating in the scene. A sure sign that you've got one of these is when [[TheBodyPartsThatMustNotBeNamed abstract nouns are used to refer to genitalia.
genitalia]].