History Main / MenUseViolenceWomenUseCommunication

--->'''Wonder Woman''': "We have a saying, my people. don't kill if you can wound, don't wound if you can subdue, don't subdue if you can pacify, and don't raise your hand at all until you've extended it."
** ''ComicBook/WonderWoman1987'': While the confrontation with the Sangtee Empire embodies this, with the all-female rebels refusing to kill and participating in all kinds of propaganda and other communication and ending the war with an agreement rather than a brutal military victory, there's also an indication that part of the problem with the Empire is systematic rather than relating to the differences between men and women, especially since the kreel are actually natural sex shifters who have stopped and made being a woman illegal due to propaganda.

*** Their views bite them in the arse when the Reapers hit Thessia. The open, debate-heavy asari political system is unable to present a co-ordinated defense in time, and while asari are born Spec Ops-operators, they are too few, and not of much use in defensive battles that require massive levels of firepower. While the human and turian homeworlds held out for months, Thessia fell in days.

* The increased levels of testosterone in men are directly correlated to propensity to violence; men are biologically, on average, more aggressive and prone to violent outbursts than women.

* Studies have shown that when two men get together, they tend to position themselves so that they're both facing the same way, whereas when two women get together, they tend to position themselves so that they're facing each other. This has commonly been interpreted to mean that women are more social, each orienting herself so that the other is the center of her attention. However, [[AlternateAesopInterpretation the findings can be interpreted many other ways as well]]: maybe women are more combative, physically orienting themselves in opposition to one another, while men are more cooperative, orienting themselves toward a common goal. Men are biologically more violent than women by virtue of their hormonal composition. Furthermore, decades of cross-cultural personality studies by psychologists such as [=McCrae=] and Costa have demonstrated that women are more interested in people (talking, communicating, being social) whereas men are more interested in ideas. So the notion of men being more violence-oriented and women more communication-oriented is well established within the literature.
* While not to the extent that [[ExecutiveMeddling executives and rating analyzers will say]], according to ratings and demographics, shows and that focus on action, violence, [[{{Gorn}} gore]] and/or [[AllMenArePerverts sex]] are more popular with men, whereas women prefer shows that focus on character development, dialogue and/or relationships, such as TeenDrama, CourtroomDrama or SliceOfLife shows, and reality shows on Creator/{{MTV}} and Creator/VH1 usually score high with women, but low with men. Vice-versa with Professional Sport shows, or combat sports like ProfessionalWrestling, Boxing, and UsefulNotes/MixedMartialArts. Though this is ''far'' from, universal, since a healthy PeripheryDemographic can grow from the [[EstrogenBrigade unintended]] [[TestosteroneBrigade demographic]].
** This is changing in TheNewTens, especially as some of the top shows typically seen as male-oriented (such as ''Series/GameOfThrones'' and ''Series/TheWalkingDead'') have grown to have just as large, if not larger, female audiences over time. [[http://www.adweek.com/tv-video/what-women-watch-tv-156621/ As this article tells;]] that the top show with women overall is, ''Series/AmericanHorrorStory'', an [[{{Gorn}} ultra-violent]], [[{{Fanservice}} hyper-sexual]] [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin horror series]] which {{av|ertedTrope}}oids stereotypes associated with female viewers. That's not even including the shows listed here. That being said, [[DoubleStandard oddly enough, the same level doesn't qualify for male fans watching female-oriented shows]].

* The Vorin religion practiced by the cultures of most of the main characters in ''Literature/TheStormlightArchive'' takes this UpToEleven, to the point where it's considered a sin for women to fight and for men to learn to read. The only exception is the ardent priestly caste, which can ignore the gender rules.

* Subverted in general by the reviewers of [[Website/ThatGuyWithTheGlasses Channel Awesome]], who whether male or female, prefer beating their enemies up. In the [[WebVideo/TGWTGYearOneBrawl first year brawl event]], WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick, That Girl With the Goggles, WebVideo/MarzGurl, and Little Miss Gamer cheerfully join in on the fight, and [[spoiler:''Ask that Guy'' of all people ends up quietly talking everyone into getting along.]]

* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSmurfs'' episode "Supersmurf", Brainy as Supersmurf tries and almost succeeds in getting the Smurfs' supply of food back from Bigmouth by using violence, only for his magic-given superpowers to wear out. Smurfette tries using communication (which in this case means feminine wiles and pleas of sympathy) to get the food back from Bigmouth, only that doesn't work either. It takes Brainy coming up with the idea of distracting Bigmouth's appetite with rocks dipped in slime sauce that the Smurfs are able to get their food back.

* ''Series/Loki2021'': [[InvertedTrope Inverted]] with Loki and Sylvie. While Loki can hold his own in a fight he generally prefers to manipulate people verbally and use illusiory magic to avoid actually trading blows. As the only magic Sylvie knows is her possession-via-enchantment trick she's more likely to use brute force to deal with enemies.

** This is changing in TheNewTens, especially as some of the top shows typically seen as male-oriented (such as ''Series/GameOfThrones'' and ''Series/TheWalkingDead'') have grown to have just as large, if not larger, female audiences over time. [[http://www.adweek.com/tv-video/what-women-watch-tv-156621/ As this article tells;]] that the top show with women overall is, ''Series/AmericanHorrorStory'', an [[{{Gorn}} ultra-violent]] [[{{Fanservice}} hyper-sexual]] [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin horror series]] which {{av|ertedTrope}}oids stereotypes associated with female viewers. That's not even including the shows listed here. That being said, [[DoubleStandard oddly enough, the same level doesn't qualify for male fans watching female-oriented shows]].

* [[ComicBook/TheMightyThor Thor #300]]: [[CosmicEntity The Celestials]] are going to judge the worth of humanity in 1000 years. When the male leaders of the [[PhysicalGod gods of Earth]] find out, they are sure it will end badly and plan to fight them. However, the female leaders decided to prove humanity's worth by gathering the best example of each human skill or art and making them immortal. Sure enough, when the Norse gods attack them they get [[CurbStompBattle curbstomped]]. Then [[MotherNature Gaia]] shows up with the chosen humans, and convinces The Celestials to spare mankind.
* In a story arc of the ''Overman'' Brazilian newspaper comic, he's searching for someone who can destroy electronic objects by looking at them. He's certain that the villain is a woman because as a man, he would just break stuff with his fists.
* ComicBook/WonderWoman is known for this trope, although some more recent writers have suggested that she would be willing to kill villains if need be.
-->'''Wonder Woman''': "We have a saying, my people. don't kill if you can wound, don't wound if you can subdue, don't subdue if you can pacify, and don't raise your hand at all until you've extended it."

[[folder:Films]]
* The Han/Leia and Anakin/Padmé pairings in ''Franchise/StarWars''. Though both Padme and Leia are definitely action girls and usually hold their own in a fight, they both clearly prefer diplomacy. Han can be quite reasonable at times, too, but never parts with his blaster. Anakin, sadly, was so much this that he killed most of the cast.
* Not exactly this, but a similar concept is ''very'' subtly used in ''Film/AnchormanTheLegendOfRonBurgundy'': the titular character, a chauvinist CasanovaWannabe, signs off his reports with his trademark "You stay classy, San Diego!", while his much more level-headed female rival, Veronica Corningstone, signs off with "Thanks for stopping by, San Diego." His is a command, hers is a compliment.

* ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXIV'' frequently inverts the trope with several female main characters whose idea to a solution is to kick ass first and ask questions second while a few male characters prefer to talk things out before resorting to violence.

* Women [[WomenAreWiser being praised as morally superior to men]] because of this trope -- the old "if only women were in charge, we wouldn't have wars".

Related to CloserToEarth. A sister trope of GuysSmashGirlsShoot. Related to why the ActionGirl used to be rare (as opposed to its current status as a common {{supertrope}}), as well as to why the NonActionGuy continues to be rare. Related to DoubleStandardAbuseFemaleOnMale, because of the idea that any man who can cause a woman to actually resort to using violence ''must'' have deserved every bit of it and more. Also see WomenAreWiser.

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* Once again, gender-flipped in ''Webcomic/AxisPowersHetalia'', with [[OfficialCouple Austria and Hungary]]. Austria prefers to use marriage and alliances to avoid conflict, while Hungary cheerfully will beat up anything that threatens them.

* ''Series/{{Torchwood}}: Miracle Day'' has a gender flip. Lynn tried to solve the problem with mind games and snark but Gwen had different ideas.

* Averted by the Doctor in ''Series/DoctorWho'', who resorts to violence only after exhausting other options (the Tenth was very fond of DontMakeMeDestroyYou). Sometimes inverted when he has an ActionGirl companion like Leela or Ace.

* Violent men [[ViolenceReallyIsTheBestAnswer putting a permanent end to the conflict]] and manipulative women, for all the mudslinging and underhanded tactics that they use, prolonging the feud -- sometimes to the point where it goes on forever.

* Violent men [[ViolenceReallyIsTheBestOption putting a permanent end to the conflict]] and manipulative women, for all the mudslinging and underhanded tactics that they use, prolonging the feud -- sometimes to the point where it goes on forever.

* Violent men [[CuttingTheKnot putting a permanent end to the conflict]] and manipulative women, for all the mudslinging and underhanded tactics that they use, prolonging the feud -- sometimes to the point where it goes on forever.

* Women being praised as morally superior to men because of this trope -- the old "if only women were in charge, we wouldn't have wars".
* Violent men putting a permanent end to the conflict and manipulative women, for all the mudslinging and underhanded tactics that they use, prolonging the feud -- sometimes to the point where it goes on forever.

* ''Series/{{Torchwood}}: Miracle Day'' has a genderflip. Lynn tried to solve the problem with mind games and snark but Gwen had different ideas.

* This trope sums up the difference in philosophy between Alm and Celica in ''[[VideoGame/FireEmblemGaiden Fire Emblem Echoes]]''. At the climax of act two, their reunion is soured when they spat over how to proceed: Alm wants to continue military action against the invading forces, Celica wants to hold a truce while she locates the [[HaveYouSeenMyGod absent god Mila]] and then renegotiate the restoration of the Divine Accord. The story is actually extremely even-handed about this, showing that Alm is aware of the devastating consequences of war, but has a point that some sort of counterattack is the only way to make the militaristic Rigel reconsider their actions. Meanwhile, Celica's desire for peace is certainly noble, but the fact she thinks an enemy being willing to parley with her is a sign of good faith in and of itself makes things a lot worse for everyone.

** This is changing in TheNewTens, especially as some of the top shows typically seen as male-oriented, (such as ''Series/GameOfThrones'' and ''Series/TheWalkingDead'') have grown to have just as large, if not larger, female audiences over time. [[http://www.adweek.com/tv-video/what-women-watch-tv-156621/ As this article tells;]] that the top show with women overall is, ''Series/AmericanHorrorStory'', an [[{{Gorn}} ultra-violent]] [[{{Fanservice}} hyper-sexual]] [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin horror series]] which {{av|ertedTrope}}oids stereotypes associated with female viewers. That's not even including the shows listed here. That being said, [[DoubleStandard oddly enough, the same level doesn't qualify for male fans watching female-oriented shows]].

* ''VideoGame/{{Persona}}'': Multiple:

The main bulk of any narrative is that whatever conflict exists gets resolved, in either the hero's or villain's way. An action show would typically showcase some form of violence as a method of solving conflict, while a more dialogue based show would showcase a form of compromise to have it resolved. Though there's a mindset out there that dictates that the process of conflict resolution is usually based on gender, with men being associated with violence and aggression and women being aligned with compromise and/or manipulation and this is applied ''regardless'' of what the show's genre is, which results in any of the following scenarios:

* Also gender flipped in ''Manga/{{Gintama}}'': men always try to talk things out rationally before resorting to sword fights, women usually respond with immediate violence.
* Once again, gender flipped in ''Webcomic/AxisPowersHetalia'', with [[OfficialCouple Austria and Hungary]]. Austria prefers to use marriage and alliances to avoid conflict, while Hungary cheerfully will beat up anything that threatens them.

** In ''Mazinger Z'' episode 3 Sayaka tested [[FemBot Aphrodite-A's]] new weapons and stated that she wished that Aphrodite was only used for peaceful purposes. In the prior episode Koji swore that he would use his SuperRobot to fight [[MadScientist Dr.]] [[BigBad Hell]].

** In a manga story, Duke has to fight a [[BrainwashedAndCrazy brainwashed]] Kouji and Tetsuya. Meanwhile, Hikaru laments that there is no way that peace can result from that battle, not matter who wins.

* [[ComicBook/TheMightyThor Thor #300]]: [[CosmicEntity The Celestials]] are going to judge the worth of humanity in 1000 years. When the male leaders of the [[PhysicalGod gods of Earth]] find out, they are sure it will end badly and plan to fight them. However the female leaders decided to prove humanity's worth by gathering the best example of each human skill or art and making them immortal. Sure enough, when the Norse gods attack them they get [[CurbStompBattle curbstomped]]. Then [[MotherNature Gaia]] shows up with the chosen humans, and convinces The Celestials to spare mankind.

** ''ComicBook/WonderWoman1987'': While the confrontation with the Sangtee Empire embodies this, with the all female rebels refusing to kill and participating in all kinds of propaganda and other communication and ending the war with an agreement rather than a brutal military victory, there's also an indication that part of the problem with the Empire is systematic rather than relating to the differences between men and women, especially since the kreel are actually natural sex shifters who have stopped and made being a woman illegal due to propaganda.

** In ''VideoGame/Persona5'', the party is forced to obtain five letters of introduction to unlock the Treasure Room of the seventh Palace. Each of the four party female party members uses their various skills to convince the [=VIPs=] to hand over their letters, but due to various circumstances, it always results in a fight. Yusuke's recruited to deal with the last VIP by drawing a tattoo for him, but it's actually Ann's idea.

** ''VideoGame/MassEffect3'' suggests that the [[ProudWarriorRaceGuy krogan]] work this way, although we only meet one female krogan in the entire series due to genophage-induced GenderRarityValue. It's also a relative value, since the first thing we see her do under her own power is gun down two enemy soldiers without a second thought.

*** Eve admits that after the Genophage is cured, the Krogan women are going to gain more political clout in their society and hints that they are also not above using a LysistrataGambit to keep the men in line and attempt to curb the worst of their BloodKnight tencendies.

*** They're monogendered (all female), and are considered flighty, promiscuous alien space babes who want to sleep their way around the galaxy (we later learn there is a ''very'' good reason why asari choose to mate with other races and not other asari). However, they are also considered top-notch diplomats and their long lifespans tolerate a degree of debate and inertia most other races can't. As Renegade Shepherd puts it, "If you want an issue talked to death, ask an asari". They are also the most adept at wielding [[PsychicPowers biotic abilities]], however, and their commandos are just as deadly as anything else in the galaxy.

* This trope sums up the difference in philosophy between Alm and Celica in ''[[VideoGame/FireEmblemGaiden Fire Emblem Echoes]]''. At the climax of act two, their reunion is soured when they spat over how to proceed: Alm wants to continue military action against the invading forces, Celica wants to hold a truce while she locates the [[HaveYouSeenMyGod absent god Mila]] and then renegotiate the restoration of the Divine Accord. The story is actually extremely even-handed about this, showing that Alm is aware of the devastating consequences of war, but has a point that some sort of counterattack is the only way to make the militaristic Rigel reconsider their actions. Meanwhile Celica's desire for peace is certainly noble, but the fact she thinks an enemy being willing to parley with her is a sign of good faith in and of itself makes things a lot worse for everyone.

* Subverted in ''Webcomic/ZombieRanch''. During episode five, after [[spoiler:the [=McCarty=]s]] arrive at the ranch, [[spoiler: Muriel [=McCarty=]]] is more than willing to do anything to get her way, including [[spoiler:shooting Brett (one of the hands) and releasing zombies to attack him]]. Likewise, Suzie has no problem holding [[spoiler:the [=McCarty=] boys]] at gun point. However, she still willing to discuss this until [[spoiler:Muriel]] pushes her too far. Meanwhile Frank and [[spoiler:Muriel's husband, Eustace [=McCarty=]]] end up negotiating, [[spoiler:not that it ends up doing much good]].
* In ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'', there are two Master Classes--the Lord, which is Active and AlwaysMale, who are destined to take the Conquest path, and conquer and destroy everything; and the Muse, which is Passive and AlwaysFemale, who are meant to [[HeroicSacrifice sacrifice themselves to bring happiness and good to the entire Universe]], [[ActualPacifist but are not expected to take part in any battle]]. The only Lord we see in ''Homestuck'' also happens to be the BigBad, while the only Muse we see is the BigGood and through careful planning helps lead the other players to a more concrete win.

* Alien X of ''WesternAnimation/Ben10AlienForce'' and ''WesternAnimation/Ben10UltimateAlien'' has two personalities, Bellicus and Serena. Bellicus is a warlike male whose answer to everything is to smash and destroy. Serena is a peace loving female who would prefer to talk everything out in a loving way. Naturally, it's almost impossible for them to agree on anything... except killing [[spoiler:Paradox]] on sight, thinking he is violating the restraining order against him.

* Studies have shown that when two men get together, they tend to position themselves so that they're both facing the same way, whereas when two women get together, they tend to position themselves so that they're facing each other. This has commonly been interpreted to mean that women are more social, each orienting herself so that the other is the center of her attention. However, [[AlternateAesopInterpretation the findings can be interpreted many other ways as well]]: maybe women are more combative, physically orienting themselves in opposition to one another, while men are more cooperative, orienting themselves toward a common goal. Men are biologically more violent than women by virtue of their hormonal composition. Furthermore, decades of cross-cultural personality studies by psycholigists such as [=McCrae=] and Costa have demonstrated that women are more interested in people (talking, communicating, being social) whereas men are more interested in ideas. So the notion of men being more violence-oriented and women more communication-oriented is well established within the literature.
* While not to the extent that [[ExecutiveMeddling executives and rating analyzers will say]], according to ratings and demographics, shows and that focus on action, violence, [[{{Gorn}} gore]] and/or [[AllMenArePerverts sex]] are more popular with men, whereas women prefer shows that focus on character development, dialogue and/or relationships, such as TeenDrama, CourtroomDrama or SliceOfLife shows, and reality shows on Creator/{{MTV}} and Creator/VH1 usually score high with women, but low with men. Vice-versa with Professional Sport shows, or combat sports like ProfessionalWrestling, Boxing and UsefulNotes/MixedMartialArts. Though this is ''far'' from, universal, since a healthy PeripheryDemographic can grow from the [[EstrogenBrigade unintended]] [[TestosteroneBrigade demographic]].

[[folder:Web Comics]]
* Averted in Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick, especially with Haley and Celia. While Celia fits the female half of this trope perfectly, Haley (another woman) is more content to shoot her way through the Theives' Guild members who are invading and trying to kill her.
** Also, the main character most likely to use diplomacy is Elan, a male.

* In ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'', there are two Master Classes--the Lord, which is Active and AlwaysMale, who are destined to take the Conquest path, and conquer and destroy everything; and the Muse, which is Passive and AlwaysFemale, who are meant to [[HeroicSacrifice sacrifice them self to bring happiness and good to the entire Universe]], [[ActualPacifist but are not expected to take part in any battle]]. The only Lord we see in ''Homestuck'' also happens to be the BigBad, while the only Muse we see is the BigGood and through careful planning helps lead the other players to a more concrete win.

* Creator/DrewCarey mocked the "there'd be no wars if women ran the world" idea and suggested that there'd be more wars than ever, going by his experience with the way women handle conflicts, and presents this hypothetical scenario:

* Toward the end of ''VideoGame/{{Persona 4}}'', notice that the males in the party advocate enacting revenge by [[spoiler: throwing Namatame into the TV]] without a second thought, while the females dissent, suspecting that they'd missed a crucial detail somewhere in the investigation and begging the player and Yosuke to think it through more carefully. Though [[{{Bifauxnen}} Naoto]] seemed to be in favor of tossing him in since she was the one who first pointed out that they could do so, although she does come around and convince Yosuke and Kanji that there are unanswered questions.
* In ''VideoGame/{{Persona 5}}'', the party is forced to obtain five letters of introduction to unlock the Treasure Room of the seventh Palace. Each of the four party female party members uses their various skills to convince the [=VIPs=] to hand over their letters, but due to various circumstances, it always results in a fight. Yusuke's recruited to deal with the last VIP by drawing a tattoo for him, but it's actually Ann's idea.

*** Mordin relates that the first time he met Eve, she was in great pain and clearly distraught by her ordeal as one of [[MadScientist Maelon's]] experiments. While he was treating her injuries, she managed to break out of one of her restraints and grabbed him. She could have easily killed him... but instead, all she said was, "''[[TearJerker Please]]''". This small act of kindness made Mordin regain his faith in the Krogan and vow to cure the genophage.

* ComicBook/WonderWoman is known for this trope, although some writers have suggested that she would be willing to kill villains if need be.

Related to CloserToEarth. A sister trope of GuysSmashGirlsShoot. Related to why the ActionGirl used to be rare (as opposed to its current status as a common {{supertrope}}), as well as to why the NonActionGuy continues to be rare. Related to DoubleStandardAbuseFemaleOnMale, because of the idea that any man who can cause a woman to actually resort to using violence ''must'' have deserved every bit of it and more.