History Main / MarsAndVenusGenderContrast

-->"How dare she imply that we had tastes as bad as her people? If the situation were reversed and I told her that ''Series/OneLifeToLive'' was like ''Series/WalkerTexasRanger'' for girls, I'd mean that as a ''compliment''."

* The TropeNamer was a continually discredited but continually popular self-help book from TheEighties, which referred to men as Martians and women as Venusians. They were the same species, and [[SeparatedByACommonLanguage used the same language]], but lived in very different ways on two different [[PlanetOfHats planets]]. In the books, Martians valued status and achievements, stoicism, direct communication, and practicality. Venusians, meanwhile, valued ''very'' nuanced communication, art and pleasure, expressing of feelings, and placed somewhat less emphasis on status and achievements. Martians apparently need time to sulk and [[ContemplateOurNavels navel-gaze]], and Venusians apparently go through a regular cycle of feeling good and feeling crappy. Eventually, the Martians figured out space travel, and launched a BenevolentAlienInvasion on Venus, after which they and their new Venusian wives and girlfriends headed to Earth to build a new society. But because their communication styles, emotional needs, and values clashed, [[LoveRuinsTheRealm they developed problems in their relationships with each other]] that Martians rarely or never experienced with other Martians, and Venusians never or rarely experienced with other Venusians [[note]] Apparently, [[QueerAsTropes LGBT people]] don't exist. [[/note]], and began to resent one another, leading to relationship drama and messy breakups. The solution to this problem, as posited by the book, is that men and women need to [[AppealToNature return]] to [[AppealToTradition traditional roles and relationships]].

Characters male and (especially) female who are affected by this trope may occasionally get wistful about the idea of how much easier things would supposedly be if they could only get together with someone of their own sex, but this rarely goes anywhere lasting, and the work will rarely notice how many potential UnfortunateImplications and internal contradictions there are in this line of thought. {{Transgender}} characters are also rare, but not entirely excluded, though expect treatment of any GenderBlendingTropes to reinforce rather than bring into question more traditional/mainstream gender binaries.

* Manga/OnePiece: Nami proves to be an archetypal character for this trope. As the series unfolds, it's clear Nami simply doesn't get men's way of thinking, be it their values, attitudes, behaviors, codes, intentions, decisions, or actions. Specifically, she doesn't understand the tacit communication between Luffy and Zoro (as seen in Buggy arc), is the only character who hates to be in a Wanted poster (in contrast with general cheerfulness male characters react with to publications and updates of those posters) and her opinions and advice are usually disregarded in topics like adventures, honor or discipline, and respect, who are important for men (like her permission for Luffy and Zoro to fight Bellamy in Jaya arc, her attempt to ruin Luffy's adventure in Skypiea and her refusal to have a campfire in Upper Yard, the whole Usopp affair in Water 7, or the "Monster Trio" accepting or supporting the "Davy Back Fight" challenge against the Fox Pirates). Even after the {{Time Skip}}, that situation doesn't change at all, as seen in [[spoiler: Punk Hazard arc]] or the [[spoiler: Whole Cake Island arc, wherein Nami decides to cut bonds with Sanji, only to see how Luffy, unlike her, stays totally loyal with him, overriding Nami's decision in the process]].

* Appears in ''{{Theatre/Camelot}}'', when King Arthur, after an argument with Guinevere, starts wishing that Merlin had included women in his childhood education:

From the beaver to the smallest bobolink? \\
I should have had a whirl \\
At changing to a girl, \\
To learn the way the creatures think! \\

[[quoteright:350:[[ComicBook/WonderWoman https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/ares_aphrodite_wonder_woman_1.png]]]]

* ''ComicBook/WonderWoman1942'': While the actual comic allows men (like ComicBook/SteveTrevor) to be compassionate and kind and women to be cruel and violent (like [[ComicBook/{{Cheetah}} Priscilla Rich]]) these traits are explicitly coded as feminine and masculine and with war-loving shortsighted [[ComicBook/{{Ares|DC}} Mars]] and peaceful loving Aphrodite acting as avatars of the two sides, as pictured above.

* ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'' plays with this - it doesn't help that the protagonist and usual viewpoint character has NoSocialSkills to the point where, combined with certain magic and body size enforced mannerisms (not meeting someone's gaze due to fear of a soulgaze, softening his voice and hunching over to de-emphasise his height), tend to lead to assumptions that he's autistic. In fact, it's more likely that it's just due to his low self-esteem and horribly damaged capacity to trust/open up to ''anyone'', even those he cares for, due to his DarkAndTroubledPast. Certainly, it's relatively unusual in the setting - more socially savvy characters, like Thomas, decry his inability to understand women.
** In the novella, ''Aftermath'', told from [[OneOfTheBoys Karrin Murphy's]] POV, Murphy keeps telling us that men speak their own language, largely composed of grunts and physical postures, that has nothing to do with English without even realizing it. She calls it [[GenreSavvy Martian]] and insists that while she learned to speak and understand it by necessity, she has no idea what thought processes are responsible for it.

* ''ComicBook/WonderWoman1942'': While the actual comic allows men (like ComicBook/SteveTrevor) to be compassionate and kind and women to be cruel and violent (like [[ComicBook/{{Cheetah}} Priscilla Rich]]) these traits are explicitly coded as feminine and masculine and with war-loving shortsighted Mars and peaceful loving Aphrodite acting as avatars of the two sides, as pictured above.

* ''Animation/{{Igra}}'': The girl draws things like flowers, while they boy draws cars, tanks, planes, etc. For that matter the boy takes most of the aggressive actions, while the girl's actions are mostly defensive, at least until she draws herself a gun.

* One episode of ''WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddparents'' has Timmy wishing he was a girl so he could figure out what his crush wants for her birthday. Justified, since the kids still believe that GirlsHaveCooties. Chester discusses this when he sees Timmy as a girl going into an arcade and freaks out: ''"Boys like comic books, girls like dolls. Boys like video games, girls like makeup. We're different! That's why we have different bathrooms!"''...which is is immediately followed by a girl walking out a stall and questioning if she's in the wrong room.

* The TropeNamer was a continually discredited but continually popular self-help book from TheEighties, which referred to men as Martians and women as Venusians. They were the same species, and [[SeparatedByACommonLanguage used the same language]], but lived in very different ways on two different [[PlanetOfHats planets]]. In the books, Martians valued status and achievements, stoicism, direct communication, and practicality. Venusians, meanwhile, valued ''very'' nuanced communication, art and pleasure, expressing of feelings, and placed somewhat less emphasis on status and achievements. Martians apparently need time to sulk and [[ContemplateOurNavels navel-gaze]], and Venusians apparently go through a regular cycle of feeling good and feeling crappy. Eventually, the Martians figured out space travel, and launched a BenevolentAlienInvasion on Venus, after which they and their new Venusian wives and girlfriends headed to Earth to build a new society. But because their communication styles, emotional needs, and values clashed, [[LoveRuinsTheRealm they developed problems in their relationships with each other]] that Martians rarely or never experienced with other Martians, and Venusians never or rarely experienced with other Venusians [[note]] Apparently, [[QueerAsTropes LGBT people]] don't exist. [[/note]], and began to resent one another, leading to relationship drama and messy breakups. The solution to this problem, [[Administrivia/RuleOfCautiousEditingJudgment as posited by the book]], is that men and women need to [[AppealToNature return]] to [[AppealToTradition traditional roles and relationships]].

* This trope was given a TakeThat in ''WesternAnimation/{{Rugrats}}'' where Phil and Lil switch the hairbow so that Tommy can see it won't be hard for him to pass as a girl. Phil cries while wearing Lil's bow and Betty rushes to her side.

* Anime/{{Vandread}}: Men and women are ''literally'' from two different but neighboring planets and have vastly different cultures. Then three men get stuck on a female pirate ship sent nearly a year from their homes. They must journey back together. Hilary ensues.

** The UpdatedRerelease, ''Catherine: Fullbody'', complicates this even more so with the introduction of Qatherine,, who is a ThirdOptionLoveInterest or a "Cheryl." Unlike Catherine (the "Betty") or Katherine (the "Veronica"), Qatherine or "Rin for short, is "sweet, kind, supportive, and calming despite being an amnesiac and a bit of a klutz. Vincent has the most at ease interactions with Rin, which makes the surprise bigger with the reveal that Rin is a [[spoiler: a male... or rather from a race of shapeshifting AngelicAliens, who's human form are feminine-looking males or {{Otokonoko}}.]] This in turn adds several more paragraphs to the potential essay of the elements of this game.

* ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'':
** In the novelette ''Aftermath'', told from [[OneOfTheBoys Karrin Murphy's]] POV, Murphy keeps telling us that men speak their own language, largely composed of grunts and physical postures, that has nothing to do with English without even realizing it. She calls it [[GenreSavvy Martian]] and insists that while she learned to speak and understand it by necessity, she has no idea what thought processes are responsible for it.
** Another quick example pops up in ''Literature/ProvenGuilty'' when Harry complains about wanting to talk with Thomas, but not telling Thomas that.

** In ''Literature/ColdDays'', Harry goes on for several paragraphs about how women communicate on five separate levels at once, according to a magazine article he read, so it's no wonder that men can't understand them.
** The first time Murphy meets Susan, Harry comments that Susan gives Murphy "the scan", a quick overview and analysis of clothing, makeup, shoes, posture, appearance, probable relative wealth and social status, which will dictate how two women will interact. Harry muses that men's equvialent is "Does he have beer, and, if yes, will he let me have one?"

* ''Literature/TheBelgariad''. Women are incomprehensible to men, who almost never win an argument against them, and there are some things about each gender the opposite is just unable to comprehend.

* The TropeNamer was a continually discredited but continually popular self-help book from TheEighties, which referred to men as Martians and women as Venusians. They were the same species, and [[SeparatedByACommonLanguage used the same language]], but lived in very different ways on two different [[PlanetOfHats planets]]. In the books, Martians valued status and achievements, stoicism, direct communication, and practicality. Venusians, meanwhile, valued ''very'' nuanced communication, art and pleasure, expressing of feelings, and placed somewhat less emphasis on status and achievements. Martians apparently need time to sulk and [[ContemplateOurNavels navel-gaze]], and Venusians apparently go through a regular cycle of feeling good and feeling crappy. Eventually, the Martians figured out space travel, and launched a BenevolentAlienInvasion on Venus, after which they and their new Venusian wives and girlfriends headed to Earth to build a new society. But because their communication styles, emotional needs, and values clashed, [[LoveRuinsTheRealm they developed problems in their relationships with each other]] that Martians rarely or never experienced with other Martians, and Venusians never or rarely experienced with other Venusians [[note]] Apparently, [[QueerAsTropes LGBT people]] don't exist. [[/note]], and began to resent one another, leading to relationship drama and messy breakups. The solution to this problem, [[Administrivia/RuleOfCautiousEditingJudgment as posited by the book]], is that men and women need to learn and [[AppealToNature get back to]] [[AppealToTradition traditional roles and relationships]].

For contrasts along cultural lines rather than gender lines, see CultureClash.

* The fourth episode of ''Manga/{{Boruto}}'' features all the boys and girls in Shino's class facing off against each other after Boruto and Sarada get into a fight over lunch.
* An episode of ''Anime/{{Pokemon}}'' does this, with Ash and James engaging in a double battle with May and Jessie after both groups (Ash's friends and Team Rocket) get into arguments over who is more competent. It ends with Jessie deciding to cheat by using an extra pokémon, which Brock says disqualifies the girls' team, but by then Team Rocket are only interested in stealing Pikachu, anyway.

* ''Series/BlakesSeven'' got into the act too with the controversial Ben Steed episode [[Recap/BlakesSevenS4E2Power "Power"]], in which a post-apocalyptic society is at war on gender lines.

* ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'':
** Parodied with the Omicronians: "It is true what they say. Women are from Omicron Perseii 7, men are from Omicron Perseii 9."
** The later episode "Neutopia" exaggerates the differences between men and women for comedic purposes, before introducing a SufficientlyAdvancedAlien who creates harmony by [[NoBiologicalSex making everyone gender-neutral]]. Everyone's fine with it until they realize it means [[AllMenArePerverts no mo]][[AllWomenAreLustful re sex]], at which point they demand their genders back -- only the alien [[GenderBender gets a few things wrong]].

* In the ''WesternAnimation/TeenTitansGo'' episode "Boys vs. Girls" Starfire and Raven beat Robin, Cyborg and Beast Boy in a contest 3-0, resulting in Cyborg and Beast Boy assuming girls are better than boys in general, rather than two particular girls just happening to be more competent and having better powers than three particular boys.

%% Some comedians that rely heavily on this trope:

%% Image selected per Image Pickin' thread: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=1452266899092104700
%% Please do not change or remove without starting a new thread.

[[folder:Films -- Live-Action]]
* Played with throughout ''Film/WhenHarryMetSally''.

[[/folder]]

* The ''Literature/BlackJewels'' series by Anne Bishop

* Creator/DaveBarry's works, especially ''Dave Barry's Guide to Guys''.

* ''Self Made Man: My Year Disguised As A Man'' by Norah Vincent explores some of the tropes surrounding this in real life

** The solution to this problem, as posited by the book, is to read the book in order to better understand the other gender.
** The credibility of the book's theory was damaged when the author wrote a book on children's gendering claiming that every boy or girl who seemed to differ from these gender stereotypes was dysfunctional, needed therapy, and therefore did not count as evidence that these gender stereotypes were not the inevitable universals he claimed them to be.

* ''Series/SexAndTheCity'' and the whole ''Film/HesJustNotThatIntoYou'' spin-off industry.

* Many, if not most, episodes of ''Series/TwoAndAHalfMen'' rely on this trope to a large degree.

* A major plot-driving force in ''Series/{{Friends}}'' .
* Even more so in ''Series/{{Coupling}}''.
* ''Series/That70sShow'' derive alot of their trademark splitscreen humor out of this.

* ''{{ComicStrip/Cathy}}''.

Some comedians that rely heavily on this trope:
* JoBrand
* Creator/BillHicks (see [[AllGirlsWantBadBoys "Chicks]] [[DracoInLeatherPants dig jerks]])"
* Creator/DenisLeary
* Creator/ChrisRock
* AdalRamones
* Creator/ChristopherTitus
* WhitneyCummings
* Creator/MargaretCho, although it's more a case of [[WhiteDudeBlackDude Gay Dude Straight Dude]]

* [[PlayingWithATrope The degree to which this trope applies]] to ''VideoGame/{{Catherine}}'' would be a good, essay-length discussion of how the game portrays the intricacies of gender relationships. On one hand, the central plot element is about a [[ThisLoserIsYou laid-back slacker]] trying to decide whether he'd be happier settling down or remaining unchained, with a BettyAndVeronica LoveTriangle externalizing his decision. [[InvokedTrope Mars-and-Venus symbolism abounds]]: the [[EsotericMotifs planetary symbols]] are ubiquitous, one of the background tracks is a ClassicalMusic remix of an ode to the planet Mars, and one of the [[ScrappyMechanic worst things]] that can happen to the player is the "Curse of the Morning Star" (i.e., Venus). Most of the protagonist's friends don't "get" women, or make assumptions about the fair sex that are flat-out wrong. When their favorite waitress--the most approachable female character--tries to set the poor boys straight, none of them take her advice. Instead, they scoff because it's assumed ''she'' wouldn't get it either. [[spoiler: [[BackStory Though this is because she is MtF.]] ]] The other women don't get as much screen time, but don't fare any better: "Betty" is a straight-laced IceQueen type, while "Veronica" shows early signs of {{Yandere}} behavior. So, what does the game ultimately decide about this Trope? ''It doesn't.'' [[MultipleEndings You do.]]

* ''Webcomic/SomethingPositive'' doesn't employ as many stereotypes as some examples, and has more non-heterosexual characters than most examples, but still portrays an inherent and quite deep divide between men and women.

** And that's not even getting into the fake mustache...

* [[CloserToEarth Sharon]] and [[BumblingDad Randy]] Marsh in ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'', as well as the whole town [[DependingOnTheWriter when the plot asks for it]].

* Parodied in WesternAnimation/CampLazlo, where the Squirrel Scouts are told this by Ms. Mucus when they ask about boys. However, [[LiteralMinded they assume it means that all guys are literal aliens]]. [[HilarityEnsues The three main scouts kidnap our protagonists who decide to play along with their misconceptions as payback.]]

Characters need not be (entirely) [[FlatCharacter flat]], but women will tend to be stereotypically female and men stereotypically male. Deviations from stereotype, where they appear, will tend to be plot points in their own right as exceptions that prove the rule, and are usually resolved by a return to something more stereotypical (e.g., {{Tomboy}} WrenchWench gets her man when she finally [[SheCleansUpNicely cleans up nicely]]).