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* ''Webcomic/SWAPEnsemble'': The second time Connie is involved in a tiebreaker elimination, she loses. Cedric begins the "If I had a nickel" speech, but she cuts him off. In case the ShoutOut to ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb'' wasn't obvious, the page description finishes the quote.
--> '''Cedric:''' If you had a nickel for every time you were involved in a tiebreaker-
--> '''Connie:''' Could you come up with a less meme-y quote?
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* The phrase shows up as a repeated refrain in "Moby Dick" by [[WebVideo/NakeyJakey Jakey]].
--> ''If I had a nickel for every time I think I did something stupid\\
Then I'd have a shit ton of nickels\\
[[SelfDeprecation That shit was stupid,]] now run it back, take it back''
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** In "Blue Harvest":
--->'''Luke Skywalker (Chris):''' They're [TIE Fighters] coming too fast!\\
'''Han Solo (Peter):''' A nickel for every time I've had that problem. Just keep shooting, Luke!

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** In "Blue Harvest":
Harvest", when the ''Millennium Falcon'' gets attacked by TIE Fighters:
--->'''Luke Skywalker (Chris):''' They're [TIE Fighters] coming too fast!\\
'''Han Solo (Peter):''' ''(under his breath)'' A nickel for every time I've had that problem. ''(loudly)'' Just keep shooting, Luke!

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-->'''Iris:''' I thought we were gonna die.
-->'''Felicity:''' If I had a dime for every time I thought that, I...I'd have $2. 40. ''(beat)'' I really thought I'd have more than that.

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-->'''Iris:''' I thought we were gonna die.
-->'''Felicity:'''
die.\\
'''Felicity:'''
If I had a dime for every time I thought that, I...I'd have $2. 40. ''(beat)'' I really thought I'd have more than that.



--> '''Olive:''' Whoa whoa. That wasn't Oscar. It was an Oscarbot.
--> '''Orchid:''' If I had a nickel every time someone said that, I would have ''[[SubvertedTrope noooooo]]'' [[SubvertedTrope nickels.]]
--> '''Oscar:''' You would have one, heh...'cause now.

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--> '''Olive:''' -->'''Olive:''' Whoa whoa. That wasn't Oscar. It was an Oscarbot.
-->
Oscarbot.\\
'''Orchid:''' If I had a nickel every time someone said that, I would have ''[[SubvertedTrope noooooo]]'' [[SubvertedTrope nickels.]]
-->
]]\\
'''Oscar:''' You would have one, heh...'cause now.


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* In ''VideoGame/LamplightCity'', during an investigation, Miles Fordham, comes across an old case about the murder of a sex worker, Lilly, which relates to a case he is currently investigating. Having learned that Serafina, the madam at the brothel Lilly worked at, still keeps her possessions in a locker [[TragicKeepsake because she cannot bring herself to get rid of them]], he asks Ruby, another woman that works at the place, if he could get to see Lilly's possessions. Ruby is hesitant to do this, as she is not sure if Serafina would approve of it, referring to how much Lilly meant to her. Miles assures her that Serafina doesn't have to know and he promises her that he is only going to "look, not touch." Ruby mutters "If I had a crown for every time I heard that..." under her breath at this.
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* ''Franchise/{{Batman}}'' (1966): "Devilishly [[ComicBook/TheJoker clown prince of crime]]! If I only had a nickel for every time he's baffled us!"

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* ''Franchise/{{Batman}}'' (1966): ''ComicBook/Batman1966'': "Devilishly [[ComicBook/TheJoker clown prince of crime]]! If I only had a nickel for every time he's baffled us!"



* In a ''ComicBook/BatgirlRebirth'' Annual, Kara tells Barbara Gordon about some telepathic messages she has been receiving:

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* In a ''ComicBook/BatgirlRebirth'' Annual, ''ComicBook/EscapeFromThePhantomZone'', Kara tells Barbara Gordon about some telepathic messages she has been receiving:
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->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?"''

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->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been I was doomed by a puppet, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?"''
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* "Chairman of the Board", by Music/TheStupendium, uses a variation near the end:
--> "I say, if I had a pound for every game of TabletopGame/{{Monopoly}} I've won, I could buy... well, another game of Monopoly, probably."
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* Music/TheHives's appropriately-titled "If I Had A Cent":
-->''If I had a cent for every time\\
You went across the line\\
Of what's appropriate or not\\
I'd be the richest guy in town.''
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* ''I.Q.'': "If you had a nickel for every nickel he has, you'd have a whole lot of nickels!"

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* ''I.Q.'': ''Film/{{IQ}}'': "If you had a nickel for every nickel he has, you'd have a whole lot of nickels!"
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* ''Film/{{Arthur}}'', on his own wealth: "I wish I had a dime for every dime I have."

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* ''Film/{{Arthur}}'', ''Film/{{Arthur 1981}}'', on his own wealth: "I wish I had a dime for every dime I have."
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--->'''Dr. Hibbert:''' Oh, if I had $75 for every novelty I've removed...Oh, by the way, the operation will cost $75.

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--->'''Dr. Hibbert:''' Oh, if I had $75 for every novelty I've removed...Oh, by the way, the operation will cost I'll need a check for $75.

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-->'''Bruce:''' Anything on that [[ComicBook/TheFlash kid from the liquor store?]]
-->'''Alfred:''' Possibly.
-->'''Bruce:''' If I had a door for every "possibly"...
-->'''Alfred:''' Yeah, it would make you even more insufferable.
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* ''Film/ZackSnydersJusticeLeague''. [[ServileSnarker Alfred]] is unimpressed when Bruce Wayne uses this trope, given that he's already a billionaire.
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* ''Literature/{{Elcenia}}'': Kolaan, discussing local EveryoneCanSeeIt somehow-not-actually-dating pair Soraak and Kutran, says that if he had an [[FictionalCurrency aaber]] for every time he tried convincing Soraak to just kiss Kutran already... well, he'd still want more, but not as much.
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Removing pothole from page quote, per What To Put At The Top Of A Page.


->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?"''

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->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?"''
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->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice, right?"''

to:

->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?"''

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* From the ''Series/OddSquad'' episode "No Ifs, Ands or Robots", regarding Orchid's toy being turned into a juice box.
--> '''Olive:''' Whoa whoa. That wasn't Oscar. It was an Oscarbot.
--> '''Orchid:''' If I had a nickel every time someone said that, I would have ''[[SubvertedTrope noooooo]]'' [[SubvertedTrope nickels.]]
--> '''Oscar:''' You would have one, heh...'cause now.
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->''"If I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have... [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice, right?"''

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->''"If ->''"Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have... have [[SubvertedTrope two nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice, right?"''

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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have ''one dollar!''"

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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'':
--> "''If
I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have ''one dollar!''"
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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If you had a dollar for every brain you don't have, you would have ''one dollar!''"

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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If you I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, you would I'd have ''one dollar!''"
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* ''Series/CrisisOnEarthX''.
-->'''Iris:''' I thought we were gonna die.
-->'''Felicity:''' If I had a dime for every time I thought that, I...I'd have $2. 40. ''(beat)'' I really thought I'd have more than that.
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->''"If I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have... two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice, right?"''

to:

->''"If I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I'd have... [[SubvertedTrope two nickels. nickels.]] Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice, right?"''
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** Also in "[[OffToSeeTheWizard The Wizard of Odd]]" when Buford was a [[MixAndMatchCritters combination Lion, Tiger and Bear,]] Buford says this after Candance, Jeremy and Baljeet's response to seeing him was "Oh my".

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** Also in "[[OffToSeeTheWizard The Wizard of Odd]]" when Buford was a [[MixAndMatchCritters combination Lion, Tiger and Bear,]] Buford says this after Candance, [[NeverHeardThatOneBefore Candace, Jeremy and Baljeet's response to seeing him was "Oh my".my"]].
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** The clip show episode plays with this trope from Doofenshmirtz, Phineas, and Linda. It cuts to a set of clips with a running total of money in the top corner. Doof and Linda realize that the total amount equals that of a candy bar.

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** The clip show episode "Phineas' Birthday Clip-O-Rama" plays with this trope from Doofenshmirtz, Phineas, and Linda. It cuts to a set of clips with a running total of money in the top corner. Doof and Linda realize that the total amount equals that of a candy bar.
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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have...I'd have one dollar."

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* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': "If I you had a dollar for every brain you don't have...I'd have, you would have one dollar."''one dollar!''"
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** From "I Remember Mono:"
-->'''Peggy:''' If your lies were dollars, I would have a $100,000 by now, and I would live off the interest, Hank. I'd still have to keep my job, but things would be a lot easier.
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** In ''Discworld/NightWatch'', Sergeant Colon says that if he had a dollar for every watchman's funeral he'd attended he'd have $19.50. He did the math right, it's just that one of them [[NotQuiteDead woke up before they buried him]].
** And in ''Discworld/LordsAndLadies'', Mustrum Ridcully says that if he had a penny for every time he'd been kicked out of the tavern in Lancre, he'd have $5.38.
** In ''Discworld/MovingPictures'', Windle Poons says that if he had a penny for every time the Watch chased him home, he'd have "fivepence-ha'penny", (because they once gave up halfway).

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** In ''Discworld/NightWatch'', ''Literature/{{Night Watch|Discworld}}'', Sergeant Colon says that if he had a dollar for every watchman's funeral he'd attended he'd have $19.50. He did the math right, it's just that one of them [[NotQuiteDead woke up before they buried him]].
** And in ''Discworld/LordsAndLadies'', In ''Literature/LordsAndLadies'', Mustrum Ridcully says that if he had a penny for every time he'd been kicked out of the tavern in Lancre, he'd have $5.38.
** In ''Discworld/MovingPictures'', ''Literature/MovingPictures'', Windle Poons says that if he had a penny for every time the Watch chased him home, he'd have "fivepence-ha'penny", (because they once gave up halfway).
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'''Brodie:''' Hello, [[https://victoriaplum.com/ Victoria]].\\

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'''Brodie:''' '''Bodie:''' Hello, [[https://victoriaplum.com/ Victoria]].\\
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* ''Literature/TheCatInTheStacksMysteries'':
** In book 1, the late Godfrey Priest's agent has to listen to a man complaining about the quality of literature nowadays and lamenting the commercialism of it all, how people have come to write for money over "literary merit". After chasing him off, she remarks that "If I had a dollar for every one of his kind I've met, I could retire."
** In Charlie's narration in book 2, when talking about how most people aren't familiar with the Maine Coon breed of cat and are confused when they see Diesel, he thinks to himself that "If I had the proverbial dime for every time someone asked me, "What is that?" I could donate a hefty sum to the library and solve some of its ongoing budget woes."
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[[folder:Anime & Manga]]

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[[folder:Anime & and Manga]]

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