History Main / CompletelyOffTopicReport

* ''ComicStrip/BigNate'': Nate's had a lot of these. Once he was supposed to write a report on Paul Revere, and instead writes it on Paul Revere from the band "Paul Revere and the Raiders". Another time, he was supposed to do a report on the Ming Dynasty and he ends up making it about the basketball player Yao Ming.
* ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'': Calvin usually manages to produce incredibly half-assed on-topic reports, but the time he was supposed to write about overpopulation and wrote a story about Susie getting eaten by dinosaurs ending with "...at least, that's how it ''ought'' to be" was rather a stretch. He also had a show and tell where he refused to show the thing or tell anything about it.

[[quoteright:300:[[ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/calvinreport3.png]]]]

[[quoteright:207:[[ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/completely_off_topic_report.png]]]]

Reasons for this may vary. Perhaps the haracter is [[OneTractMind so attached to a particular subject]] that they just want to write about this topic and somehow tie it to the original prompt, regardless of how convoluted the relation is. This is a good way for a creator to show off a character's quirk. Or maybe the character discovers a special gift or talent by steering away from the topic. Another commonly used reason is to show that the character has some sort of agenda, so they write something unrelated (or tangentially related) to the assignment as a thinly-veiled attack or call to action.

A usually PlayedForLaughs trope, this occurs when a character, usually a student, gives a report (or other written assignment) that has absolutely nothing to do with the assignment given. Sometimes this occurs for other reasons, however. Perhaps a character is [[OneTractMind so attached to a particular subject]] that they just want to write about this topic and somehow tie it to the original prompt, regardless of how convoluted the relation is. This is a good way for a creator to show off a character's quirk. Or maybe a character discovers a special gift or talent by steering away from the topic. Another commonly used reason is to show that a character has some sort of agenda, so they write something unrelated (or tangentially related) to the assignment as a thinly-veiled attack or call to action.

* In ''WesternAnimation/{{Arthur}}'', episode "Buster's Growing Grudge", Buster is frustrated that Binky told one of Buster's jokes while presenting his report on UsefulNotes/ChristopherColumbus and seemingly got a good grade for it while Buster receives a D for his report about [[UsefulNotes/{{Tutankhamun}} King Tut]]. Near the end of the episode, we get this exchange between Buster and Arthur.

* ''Film/{{Clueless}}'' when a report about the Haitians (pronounced Hait-i-ans) goes a little off-topic:

* In ''Film/{{Evolution|2001}}'', Professor Kane is pleased to report everyone in his biology class got As on their research papers, only for the [[TheDitz Deke and Danny]] to complain that they got C-:

* [[http://blog.ravmilim.co.il/ There's an old joke]] (or rather was, as its relevance has obviously diminished) about some Jews' tendencies towards SingleIssueWonk about the question of the political status of Jews, a.k.a. "the Jewish Question": A professor of zoology at Harvard asked his students to write a paper about elephants. A [[GermanicEfficiency German]] student wrote a paper titled "Foreword to the Bibliography to the Elephantine Sciences", a [[EverythingSoundsSexierInFrench French]] student wrote one titled "The Elephant's Love Life", an [[QuintessentialBritishGentleman English]] student wrote one titled "Elephant Hunting", an [[AmericansAreCowboys American]] student wrote a one titled "How to Raise Bigger and Better Elephants", and a [[JewsLoveToArgue Jewish]] student wrote a paper titled "The Elephant and the Jewish Question". A common variant has only the Jewish one, writing a paper that begins with, "The elephant is a large animal that has a tail that resembles a worm. One people known as bookworms are the Jews", and goes to to discuss the Jewish Question at length. Since then, the expression "the elephant and the Jewish Question" has been used in Hebrew to mean "two unrelated subjects linked together with a tenuous connection", made HilariousInHindsight by the involvement of [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Peel,_1st_Earl_Peel William Peel, 1st Earl Peel]] in the issue of dividing Mandatory Palestine, as ''pil'' is the Hebrew word for "elephant".

* One ''ComicStrip/CowAndBoy'' strip had Billy present his science fair project as the dangers of molecular teleportation to his class, explaining that they would end up as people that got their genes mixed up animals or get their limbs in the wrong places. After Billy finishes his report, the teacher tells him that she thought that his project was on photosynthesis and Billy responds "My plant died".

* Downplayed, but serious, variant in ''Fanfic/HarryPotterAndTheUndergroundsSaviour''. Frisk takes exception to writing a report about killing werewolves, and writes about their humanity instead. Snape is not pleased.

-->'''Prof. Kane:''' Allow me to share something with the entire class. Last night as I was grading papers, I came across two gems both entitled "Cells are Bad" and both with just one paragraph which I unfortunately committed to memory: "Cells are bad. My uncle lives in a cell. It's ten foot by twelve and he has to read the same boring, old magazine everyday. The end." Although my standards are nowhere near where they used to be I could not bring myself to put As atop those beauties.

* In ''Film/MeanGirls'', Gretchen reads a report in class about ''Theatre/JuliusCaesar'', specifically the murder scene, which is a very thinly veiled attack against Regina's tyrannous behavior and has fairly little to do with the actual plot. Ironically, Gretchen's rant still manages to capture the motivations of Julius Caesar's murder quite accurately.

* Creator/PhilipRoth's ''The Counterlife''. Nathan Zuckerman is asked by his brother Henry's widow (named Carol) to write a 3000 word eulogy on him, but being an author, he can't help but see his brother's life as novel-material and is completely unable to write a proper eulogy. He ends up writing some kind of biography based on what said brother told him before his passing; it describes in a romanticized way Henry's long psychological agony about his sexual impotence, and his adulterous relationship with his assistant Wendy, which Carol wasn't supposed to know about.

* ''{{Series/Community}}'': In "[[Recap/CommunityS1E02Spanish101 Spanish 101]]", Jeff and Pierce are assigned a simple presentation in Spanish class, needing to only exchange five phrases in conversational Spanish. Pierce goes way overboard, delivering a presentation that has multiple costumes, props, pyrotechnics (sparklers) and even has an audience participant (Annie) at one point. However, they did fail to include the actual five phrases needed to get a passing grade.

* ''Series/DoctorWho'': In [[Recap/DoctorWhoS36E5Oxygen "Oxygen"]], the Doctor delivers a lecture on all the ways that space can kill you to a packed lecture theatre. It was supposed to be on crop rotation. In [[Recap/DoctorWhoS36E1ThePilot "The Pilot"]], his companion Bill mentions that he does this almost every lecture and the university doesn't care.

* Gilda Radner had two characters on ''Series/SaturdayNightLive'' for whom this was their entire schtick, both commentators on "Weekend News Update". One was Emily Litella, who, being hard of hearing as well as a bit naïve, always misunderstood the topic she was supposed to be speaking about (too much violence on television, for instance) and ends up discussing a different topic (too much ''violins'' on television). When told of her mistake, she would the drop the topic entirely, ending with her catchphrase "Never mind." The other character, Roseanne Roseannadana, would always veer from the original subject and into some embarrassing, graphically disgusting personal anecdote. When told what that had to do with the original topic, she responded with her own catchphrase, "It's always something."

-->'''Picard:''' Dr. Vassbinder gave an hour long dissertation on the ionization of warp nacelles before he realized that the topic was supposed to be... ''psychology''.\\

--> '''Larisa:''' Your date will usually treat you like a princess at first. So to judge his character, pay particular attention to how he treats strangers.
--> '''Larisa:''' Arguing with other internet users is just marginally more productive than counting the ants in your garden.
--> '''Larisa:''' Before you leave the house: keys, wallet, phone!
--> '''History teacher:''' Those certainly weren’t three important teachings of Creator/{{Aristotle}}, but I’ll give you a plus for those words of wisdom anyway.

* In the ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' episode "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?", the first restaurant review Homer submits mostly consists of non sequitur and random rambling:

'''Editor:''' You keep using words like "Pasghetti" and "Momatoes" You make numerous threatening references to the UN and at the end you repeat the words "Screw Flanders" over and over again.\\

-->--''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'', "[[Recap/SouthParkS1E4BigGayAlsBigGayBoatRide Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride]]"

-->'''Prof. Kane''': Allow me to share something with the entire class. Last night as I was grading papers, I came across two gems both entitled "Cells are Bad" and both with just one paragraph which I unfortunately committed to memory: "Cells are bad. My uncle lives in a cell. It's ten foot by twelve and he has to read the same boring, old magazine everyday. The end." Although my standards are nowhere near where they used to be I could not bring myself to put As atop those beauties.

* Gilda Radner had two characters on ''Series/SaturdayNightLive'' for whom this was their entire schtick, both commentators on "Weekend News Update". One was Emily Litella, who, being hard of hearing as well as a bit naïve, always misunderstood the topic she was supposed to be speaking about (too much violence on television, for instance) and ends up discussing a different topic (too much ''violins'' on television). When told of her mistake, she would the drop the topic entirely, ending with her CatchPhrase "Never mind." The other character, Roseanne Roseannadana, would always veer from the original subject and into some embarrassing, graphically disgusting personal anecdote. When told what that had to do with the original topic, she responded with her own CatchPhrase, "It's always something."

-->--''WesternAnimation/SouthPark''

* In ''Film/{{Evolution}}'', Professor Kane is pleased to report everyone in his biology class got As on their research papers, only for the [[TheDitz Deke and Danny]] to complain that they got C-:

* ''VideoGame/BestOfThree'': Helen, out of her distaste for AP English, refused to read a single word ''Literature/AnnaKarenina''. Her essay was about a completely different book, and during class discussions, she just said whatever popped into her head. Her teacher never noticed a difference.

* ''Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince'': When the regular Quidditch commentator is unable to report on a match, [[CloudCuckoolander Luna Lovegood]] volunteers to replace him. During the match she talks about things like interesting clouds and whether one of the players suffers from something called "Loser's Lurgy", but never about the action or the score of the game.

* One urban legend describes a biology professor who always assigns the prompt "describe the earthworm" for the essay question on the midterm. But one year, he decides to change it to "describe the elephant". One of his students writes an essay that starts with a very basic description of an elephant that ends by saying its trunk resembles an earthworm... then goes on to describe an earthworm for the rest of its content.

--> '''History teacher:''' Those certainly weren’t three important teachings of Aristotle, but I’ll give you a plus for those words of wisdom anyway.

* Done seriously in ''[[Literature/WindOnFire The Wind Singer]]''. Aramanth has a series of mandatory tests by which families gain or lose status. Most of the Gray applicants (the lowest class) have failed the rigidly standardized tests many times and and expect to fail again, so Mr. Hath convinces them to ignore the questions and just write about what they do know (and in many cases are unsung experts on).

* In ''Film/MeanGirls'', Gretchen reads a report in class about ''Theatre/JuliusCaesar'', specifically about the murder scene, which is a very thinly veiled attack against Regina's tyrannous behavior and has fairly little to do with the actual plot.

* ''WesternAnimation/XMenEvolution'': Spike was supposed to write a report on the Strategic Defense Initiative "Star Wars program," but he wasn't paying attention and turned in a report about ''Film/StarWars'' instead.