History Main / ComicallyWordyContract

* ''Film/{{Wonka}}'': The contract to rent from Mrs. Scrubbit initially seems like an ordinary sheet of paper but soon unfolds until it nearly reaches all the way across the room. Should anyone actually try to read it[[note]]It's written to entrap guests in indentured servitude via ridiculous fees such as drinking the glass of gin they provide or using the stairs[[note]], Bleacher clubs them over the head.

* ''Series/TheMuppetShow'' plays with this in the episode featuring Music/AliceCooper. Cooper is trying to get various people to sign a DealWithTheDevil. It doesn't work out well. Gonzo eventually materializes in a puff of smoke, holding a very long scroll. Kermit asks him if it's the contract with the Devil.
-->'''Gonzo:''' Worse! It's the bill from special effects!

[[caption-width-right:300:What your typical Terms of Agreement feel like.]]

* ''Film/Bedazzled2000'' had a contract big enough to be a phone book to a medium sized city. Elliot doesn't read it before he signs it. [[Spoiler: When he performed the selfless, benevolent act of wishing Allison a happy life he got out of hell under paragraph 147, paragraph 9 ,subsection 3. If he had read the contract he'd have known such an act might get him out of hell, so it wouldn't be selfless.]]

* ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'': In the episode [[Recap/StarTrekTheNextGenerationS3E2TheEnsignsOfCommand The Ensigns of Command]] we meet the Sheliak, a nonhumanoid race who thinks of humans as lesser life forms. Their language is so complex that humans can't learn it, so when writing a treaty the Sheliak insisted on an absurd level of precision to remove any possible ambiguity with the English language. The treaty is half a million words long and took 372 Federation lawyers to write.

* In the ''WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddParents'' episode where [[JackassGenie Norm the Genie]] is introduced, the wishes he gives Timmy are conceded with the ExactWords that Timmy said. After Norm tricks Timmy into wishing Cosmo and Wanda to be trapped, Timmy wises up and wishes for a lawyer. The Lawyer draws up a very lengthy contract, that Norm signs, that states that Timmy's next wish will be conceded with no weird surprises or tricks.

* When the Wiki/SCPFoundation did tests on [[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-738 SCP-738]], who is essentially Hell's negotiator, they sent in their genius legal counsel Sheldon Katz, who sat down to make a deal with the entity. What followed was a ''900-page'' contract written over the course of 41 hours, before Katz collapsed from exhaustion while negotiating the precise definition of the word "shall". The entity left a note for Katz stating "Come back anytime. [[WorthyOpponent I haven't had this much fun in years]]!"

* Webcomic artist ''[[Webcomic/Baalbuddy}} Baalbuddy's]]'' series on female elf character alignment features a RunningGag with elf women of each ''TabletopGame/DungeonsAndDragons''-style character alignment shocking their male lover with a sudden pregnancy. The LawfulNeutral Elf reacts to his surprise by asking if he read her contract before sex. He replies that it was ''500 pages long'', and she morbidly states that she needs to inform him of all the ''other'' things that he's now signed on for.

* Webcomic artist baalbuddy's series on female elf character alignment features a RunningGag with elf women of each ''TabletopGame/DungeonsAndDragons''-style character alignment shocking their male lover with a sudden pregnancy. The LawfulNeutral Elf reacts to his surprise by asking if he read her contract before sex. He replies that it was ''500 pages long'', and she morbidly states that she needs to inform him of all the ''other'' things that he's now signed on for.

** In the season 7 finale "[[Recap/SupernaturalS07E23SurvivalOfTheFittest Survival of the Fittest]]", Leviathan Dick Roman and Crowley come to terms where Crowley gets Canada in exchange for not helping the Winchesters create a weapon that can kill Leviathans (one of the ingredients is Crowley's blood). Dick tells Crowley that he doesn't do the "sealed with a kiss" thing that Crowley usually does to close his deals. Crowley nods and pulls out an extremely long parchment contract that stretches a good ten feet with unrolled. They then spend a good amount of time painstakingly going over it before agreeing to sign.

* ''[[WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies]]'': "Fool Coverage," pairing WesternAnimation/PorkyPig and WesternAnimation/DaffyDuck in a satire on insurance and fine print clauses in contracts. Here, Daffy is a shady insurance salesman, trying to convince Porky to buy coverage from his company, using the promise of a $1 million payoff for a black eye to hook him in. Only thing is – as Daffy deliberately holds back on revealing until Porky buys (staging a series of accidents in the meantime, all of which Daffy takes the brunt of) – the following events ''must'' happen for the company to pay out such a settlement: A wild stampede of elephants rumbles through the house between 3:55 and 4 p.m. on the Fourth of July, and there must be a hailstorm occurring during said event. Before Porky can tell Daffy he's been ripped off ... things are turned UpToEleven when all of those provisions are met, one by one, as Daffy begins sweating bullets. Once Porky shows a speechless Daffy his black eye and tells him he'd like his check now, the duck – desperate to not have to pay up money he likely does not have – quickly points out there must also be a baby zebra run through the house, doing an aside that he just added that to worm his way out of the predicament. To Daffy's shock... a baby zebra gallops through the house right there and then, knocking the duck down. Daffy groggily gasps, "... and one baby zebra!" before passing out for good!