History Main / CannotTellAJoke

* Gypsy from ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000'', to judge from the few times she was allowed to comment on a movie.
** Joel and the bots do a group impression of Rip Taylor with a string of increasingly lame, desperate prop jokes. IT'S FUNNYYY!
* A RunningGag in ''Series/ShootingStars'', where Vic's OnceAnEpisode attempt to tell a Dove From Above-related joke results in silence, whistling wind, and tumbleweeds. Unless another character reads the same joke for him, in which case it of course becomes enormously amusing.
* Anya in ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''
-->"Quiet, you'll miss the humorous conclusion!"
** Perhaps you should introduce her to her insect reflection.
*** It still isn't funny.
** It's worth noting that this was in a dream Giles was having while the First Slayer stalked his dreamscape, based on the fact that the real Anya is funny without meaning to be, with her oddities of behavior.
* Simon from ''Series/{{Firefly}}'' is seemingly bad at telling funny stories about working at Hospitals.
** Then again, when he's going up against the possibility of Inara telling some funny whoring stories the poor guy hasn't got much of a chance.
** His story about making surgeon in "Objects In Space" is much better.
* Dick Loudon demonstrates this on at least one ''Series/{{Newhart}}'' episode.

* In ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'', one of Data's many attempts to become more human involves him trying to understand the nature of humor. He enlists the help of a holodeck comedian program, and memorizes all the jokes...then proceeds to completely botch the delivery of every one. [[SoUnfunnyItsFunny It's hilarious to watch.]]
** In one of the last episodes ("Journey's End"), he actually pulled a joke off ''perfectly'', then explained that it wasn't a serious statement, killing the joke.
* ''Series/MontyPythonsFlyingCircus'' - as the funniest joke in the world proves an effective crippling weapon for the British in WWII, the Nazis try it themselves: An English couple listening to the radio hear a thick Germanic voice saying "Dere vere zwei peanuts valking down ze strasse, und vun vas assaulted. ...peanut." 'Deutschland Uber Alles' then plays triumphantly as the couple exchange puzzled looks.
* [[LovableNerd Spencer Reid]] of ''Series/CriminalMinds'' tells hilarious jokes ... if you're a genius speed-reading polymath with an eidetic memory. Otherwise, not so much.
* The entire premise of Luann Lockhart on ''Series/MadTV'', the amateur stand-up comedian who has no idea how to tell a joke.
--> '''Luann:''' So...do any of you like the holidays?
--> ''(People applaud)''
--> '''Luann:''' Uh, yeah, me neither. [[DontExplainTheJoke I'M ONLY FOOLING!]]
* Cliff Clavin of ''Series/{{Cheers}}'' attempts stand-up at one of those amateur hour comedy clubs, and his entire schtick is endless variations of "...what's up with that?" Yeah, he bombs.
* Reed from ''Series/AdamTwelve''. He spends a good portion of the finale of season one trying to tell Malloy a joke about ... a dog... and paint... or something, suffering constant interruptions from calls (not his fault) and his own disjointed retelling (totally his fault), and then he's crushed when Malloy doesn't laugh.
* Jeffrey from ''Series/HiDeHi'' is completely hopeless in front of a microphone. This is, in itself, [[SoUnfunnyItsFunny utterly hilarious]].
* Andy Kaufmann in his Little Foreign Man character would do a stand-up routine with deliberately incomprehensible, unfunny 'jokes'.
* On at least one occasion, KITT of ''Series/KnightRider'' tried to entertain Michael with pre-programmed jokes. He ended up completely messing them up, which wasn't too surprising ... but as it ended up, [[spoiler:it was his badly-told jokes that saved Michael's life.]]
* The Italian [[strike: ComedicSociopathy]] SadistShow series ''Series/CameraCafe'' has a sketch named "La barzelletta di Silvano" ("Silvano's joke") that [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin is based on this trope]]. It basically involves Silvano, a nerdy ButtMonkey, while he tries to replace an old (and supposedly overused before the sketch) joke involving a bald man to another one related to the math he usually has to deal with. The problem is, other than the new joke being a ReplacementScrappy of the previous ActuallyPrettyFunny joke, that, for one reason or another, he ''never'' gets to tell it. When a coworker of his ''finally'' manages to get him to return to the previous joke, Andrea the (''bald'') bodyguard comes in. And, as always, given how violent, sadistic and bossy Andrea is, the sketch ends exactly with [[NoHoldsBarredBeatdown what happens every time Andrea appears in any sketch.]]
* The King from ''Franchise/TheMuppets'' special ''Film/TalesFromMuppetlandTheFrogPrince''.
--> Why's a king's wand called a scepter? 'Cuz everyone in the kingdom works and he doesn't!
* In the ''Series/RedDwarf'' episode "Better than Life", the newly-titled "Admiral" Rimmer is attempting to tell an anecdote, but can't remember exactly what happened. It was so bad that even ''the fictional officers from his ideal dream'' went through a couple of seconds of embarrassed, uncertain silence before bursting into sycophantic laughter.
* Ferguson from the Nickelodeon sitcom ''Series/ClarissaExplainsItAll'' was generally a straight-laced, snobby know it all. Later in the series, he spent an entire episode practicing the delivery of a cliche joke (A homeless man walks up to me on the street and says he hasn't had a bite in...) for some event that he was participating in. The humor came not from the joke itself, but from the ludicrous attempts at telling it, which eventually started including ridiculous stresses on random words of the punchline, a la "I bit '''him'''. '''I''' bit him. I '''bit''' him."
* An episode of ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'' has an example with Castiel referencing a text as a joke "you breed with the mouth of a goat". This spawned the in-fandom meme "It's funnier in Enochian."
** Uriel is apparently the funniest angel in the garrison. [[TheComicallySerious Ask anyone.]]
* Brennan from ''Series/{{Bones}}'' as part of her general social incompetence.
* Mike from ''Series/{{Community}}'' episode [[Recap/CommunityS1E12ComparativeReligion Comparative Religion]]:
-->'''Mike:''' "Oh, you're funny. You're a funny man. Wanna hear somethin' funny, funny man? Knock-knock -- My fist up your balls!"\\
'''Jeff:''' "... Who's there?"

* ''Series/DrewCareysImprovAGanza'': "What is the difference between a rabbi and an Irishman window? One is a pane of glass, and the other's a Jew. ...Think about it."
* Paul from ''Series/MTVLive''.
* Armando from ''Series/TheArmandoIannucciShows'' is this; when he is asked to do a speech to a group of corporate executives on the grounds that, as the writer of ''Series/ImAlanPartridge'', he must be funny. Armando's speech consists of PowerPoint explanations of various jokes, including "My Dog's Got No Nose".
* ''Joker's Wild'' was a panel game from Creator/{{ITV}}, in which six comedians were each given a subject by the chairman (Barry Cryer). They had to tell a joke on this subject, and a member of the opposing team could interrupt if they thought they knew it. When Eric Sykes was on one of the teams, he played this trope for all it was worth (including, at one point, having team captain Alfred Marks go over to him and talk him through a joke).
-->'''Eric:''' Animals. Yes. There was this fella, and he was very strong...no, his wife was dying, that was it...she was Scottish, so Scott--no, she wasn't dying, she was pretty fit, you know... but she thought one day she ''might'' die, so she said to her husband, she said, um...
-->''(buzz)''
-->'''Barry:''' Interruption by his own captain.
-->'''Alfred:''' Can I retire? What with him, and now Eric...
-->'''Barry:''' No, no, Eric's still talking. Happy retirement.
-->'''Eric:''' Right--so he looked up, and he said "Don't jump"! ...No, no, you've put me right off now...no, listen, seriously, this is a real joke, I've been working on this for a week, and...
-->''(audience laughter as Ray Martino takes his belt off and pretends to hang himself)''
-->'''Eric:''' And she...no, he...
-->'''Barry:''' I'll give you five points now, Eric, we can return to this in the second half.
* In the first episode of ''Series/LifesTooShort'', Liam Neeson's attempts at improv comedy always end being about contracting [=AIDs=] from an African prostitute.

* One episode of ''Series/KnowingMeKnowingYouWithAlanPartridge'' featured the truly awful ventriloquist act of Joe Beazley and Cheeky Monkey. Even Alan realised how terrible they were.
* OnceAnEpisode on ''Series/TheTwoRonnies'', Ronnie Corbett would sit in a chair and explain that he was now going to tell a simple joke. He would often deviate from the subject this early by something like explaining that the editor wasn't happy with how it had gone last week and had... etcetera. This inability to stick to the point that tended to result in a three-line joke taking five minutes was the actual joke.

* In ''[[Series/TheMuppetShow The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence]]'', UsefulNotes/GeorgeWashington on Mount Rushmore is depicted like this.
* ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'': In "The Hesitation Ramification", Sheldon attempts to develop a unified theory of comedy to make anyone laugh at any time. Pretty much every attempt he makes to tell a joke falls into this category.

%%* Setsuna in ''Anime/{{Negima}}''. - ZCE
* The English dub of ''Manga/SgtFrog'' has Koyuki act like this in episode 18. She tells a condensed, G-rated version of TheAristocrats, apparently [[ComicallyMissingThePoint not knowing the point of the joke]] is to make it [[ShaggyDogStory as drawn-out]] [[RefugeInAudacity and vulgar]] as possible.
* Tenshinhan in ''Anime/DragonBallZ'' encounters trouble with this trope when Kaio requires all potential students to tell him a joke. He ''did'' manage a joke. Once. It wasn't funny, though. Kaio was scared by Tenshinhan's seriousness and determination, so he thought that laughing was the best solution.
** Similarly, Piccolo is also unable to tell a joke and refuses to make one, but Kaio takes one of his lines as a hilariously bad joke and he ends up laughing anyway.

* Masaomi Kida from ''{{LightNovel/Durarara}}''. Not that it stops him from trying at every chance.
* In ''Manga/{{Nichijou}}'', the principal tells old jokes that no one gets, while Yuuko's are just terrible.

* As a part of her NoSocialSkills, Saori from ''Manga/WanderingSon'' sucks at jokes.

* Creator/RichardPryor had a routine about a childhood friend who would constantly attempt to tell jokes and botch them up, but he was such a large, intimidating kid [[LaughWithMe that everyone would laugh anyway.]]

* ''Fanfic/PastSins'' has an example played for drama. The audience doesn't laugh because the pony telling the joke is [[spoiler:Nightmare Moon!]]

* [[Franchise/AceAttorney Phoenix]] in ''WebAnimation/TurnaboutStorm''. [[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Pinkie Pie]] says she'll help him if he tells her a funny joke, and Phoenix tries to. Simply put, the lameness [[OutOfCharacterMoment manages to leave her speechless]].

* In ''Fanfic/AmazingFantasy'', the first joke Future Izuku cracks in the story is a god-awful pun on web-swinging that's implied to provoke a LamePunReaction from his audience. His teenage self has a tendency to take Peter's jabs and jokes at face value.

* Biff Tannen in ''Film/BackToTheFuture'' is constantly, err, biffing his attempts at wordplay with lines like "Why don't you make like a tree and get out of here," and "That's as funny as a screen door on a battleship." Presumably everyone is too afraid of him to correct him. He is [[{{Lampshading}} berated]] for this by his older self in the [[Film/BackToTheFuturePartII second movie]].
* In ''Film/TheImitationGame'', the hero is shown to be socially inept and can't manage to tell a joke on his own or recognise them in others.
* In ''Film/{{Bill}}'', Christopher Marlowe doesn't really get comedy and spends much of the movie attempting to tell a YourMom joke after Shakespeare introduces him to the concept. And failing.
* ''Film/RaisingArizona'': H.I's boss, Glen, is always telling Polack jokes that no one thinks are funny. He also bungles one and has to start over again. H.I. notes that it finally gets him in trouble when he tries to crack a Polack joke to a Polish highway patrolman.
* ''Film/TheIncrediblyStrangeCreatures'': The comedian in the nightclub is horrendous, especially his timing on the "my mother irons and my father steals" joke, which was really old even when this movie was made. {{Lampshaded}} when someone in the audience snickers prematurely.
* Roger de Bris in ''Film/TheProducers''.
-->'''Roger:''' Messieurs Bialystock and Bloom, I presume? Ha! Forgive the pun!\\
'''Leo:''' ''(aside to Max)'' What pun?\\
'''Max:''' ''(aside to Leo)'' Shut up! He thinks he's witty!

* Jake from ''Literature/{{Animorphs}}'' can snark with the best of them, but when it comes to telling outright jokes, he inevitably summons the crickets. Even Ax, at one point, gets a big laugh just by repeating a joke that Jake had told him earlier. Nobody laughed the first time.
* Creator/MarkTwain wrote an essay about humor that explained how to do this.

* Theatre/SweeneyTodd in ''Literature/{{Dodger}}'':
-->At some time, somebody must have told Mister Todd that a barber, in addition to tonsorial prowess, should have memorized practically a library of jokes, anecdotes and miscellaneous rib-ticklers, occasionally including - should the gentleman in the chair be of the right age or nature - ones that might include some daring remarks about young ladies. However, that had given him this advice had simply not calculated on Sweeney's terrible lack of anything that could be called bonhomie, cheerfulness, ribaldry or even a simple sense of humour.
* The titular character of the ''Literature/SebastianDarke'' series has this problem, which is unfortunate, because he works as a [[TheJester jester.]]
* The 1929 book ''Literature/JokesCrackedByLordAberdeen'' attained a cult following (and original copies became much sought-after) in [[TurnOfTheMillennium the 2000s]] due to its reputation for this. It's likely that his Lordship ''could'' tell a joke, in person... but when written down they become SoUnfunnyItsFunny.
* In ''Literature/FiftyFeetOfTrouble'', the blob monster Gelatin Keyes knows lots of jokes and delivers them with the proper energy. The problem is that he never matches the setup to the right punchline.
* ''Literature/{{Unsong}}'': Archangel Uriel doesn't get the human concept of humour. His first attempt at making a joke is to just say "knock knock" before a random sentence. After Sohu tries to get him to understand by comparing jokes to Kabbalistic correspondences, he comes up with the following joke:
-->'''A''': Knock Knock.\\
'''B''': Who's there?\\
'''A''': "Nachash" is the Hebrew word for Serpent, but it has a Gematria value of 358, which is the same as the Hebrew word "Moshiach", meaning Messiah. Thus, although the Serpent introduces sin into the world and and the Messiah redeems the world from sin, both are Kabbalistically identical.

* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'': Mr. Boynton is rarely if ever able to tell a joke in a way that would be funny. The humor comes from the lameness of his attempt, and Miss Brooks' [[DeadpanSnarker response]] - [[OfficialCouple although, Miss Brooks once mentions she loves his terrible sense of humour.]]
* Harriet Hayes (''Series/Studio60OnTheSunsetStrip'') is depicted as incapable of either remembering the text, structure or delivery of a joke. She's a professional comedian...
* Dana, the producer on ''Series/SportsNight'', is said to be bad at jokes.
* Nancy Weeks, the delightfully awful "Head of Continuing Drama" in ''Series/MovingWallpaper'' is alleged to be thus. in S 2 E 5, the writers are discussing whether or not to put a joke in her speech. Pope, the producer, recommends against this, saying "the woman's got the comic timing of (something)".
* ''Series/{{The Office|US}}'': Michael Scott epitomizes this trope. Examples:
** When Michael falls for Jim's "It smells like Updog in here" joke (punchline: "[[{{Henway}} What's Updog?]]" "I don't know, what's up with you?"), he's so enamored with the joke that he attempts to retell it to everyone, but fails repeatedly. When he finally does properly trick someone into saying "What's Updog?" he botches the follow-up. "I'm fine, how are you?"
** After Michael is the face-slapping butt of Dwight's [[http://www.noob.us/humor/the-office-kgb-knock-knock-joke/ KGB knock-knock joke]], he argues with Dwight about answering Jim's "door". Of course, more [[AuthorityEqualsAsskicking face-slapping]] ensues.
*** That's because the KGB waits for no one.
** "Are you serious?" "[[Film/{{Airplane}} Yes. And don't call me Shirley.]]"
** His original counterpart in the British version, David Brent, was also like this, due to a similar over-reliance on second hand humor from old comedy shows and a general lack of wit.

* JD from ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'' is like this. When attempting to tell a joke about why a man who thinks he's a moth went to the dentist's (the light was on) he ends up improvising a whole pointless conversation between the man and the dentist to stall for time while he tries to remember the punch line.
** And later in the episode, he gives the person he was telling the joke to a written copy of it... which covers three pages on both sides.
** Carla also falls into this. Dr. Cox calls her out on it when he points out why everybody else in the hospital is funny, including calling Ted the "hospital sad sack". Dr. Cox notes that she ''can'' be funny when she's being sarcastic or arrogant, but her jokes are never funny.
* If she hadn't been [[SuspiciouslySimilarSubstitute substituted]] after one season, this would probably have been a bigger part of Kate in ''Series/NotGoingOut''. She only attempted to actually tell a joke once, and it did indeed go horribly, but Lee asked her at one point if she ever gets jokes. They just seems to be something she struggles with in general.
* Zag in Zig and Zag's ''Nothing to do With Toast Video'' frequently tries to tell an elephant joke, which is invariably ruined by his inability to pronounce the word elephant.
* ''Series/StargateSG1'' had an episode where Teal'c attempts to tell a joke, and fails miserably.
** It's a translated Jaffa joke; presumably, it's hilarious to Jaffa (maybe there's some pun in Goa'uld that makes it work). It goes: "Three Jaffa meet on a strange planet: a Horus guard [worshipper of the hawk-headed Egyptian god Horus], a Serpent guard [worshipper of Apophis] and a Setesh guard [worshipper of a doglike god, long-lost and considered sort of like mythical bumpkins by the others]. It is a tense moment. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Setesh guard's... nose drips!" And Teal'c bursts out laughing.
*** How is that not funny? It's the absurdity of it all. It's a tense situation. The Horus guard does something impressive, the Serpent guard does something else impressive, and the Setesh guard [[RuleOfThree does something]]...less impressive. Setup, further setup, and Subversion.
** Another ''SG-1'' example occurs in "Citizen Joe" in which Joe Spencer seems incapable of telling a simple joke.
* ''Series/{{Monk}}'' tries a few times, as a part of trying to become more social.

* Granny Weatherwax of Literature/{{Discworld}} doesn't quite 'get' humour. In ''Discworld/WitchesAbroad'', Granny keeps trying to tell a joke that goes "A man walks into a sandwich shop and sees a sign that says, 'We make all kinds of sandwiches'. So he says 'I'll have an alligator sandwich -- and make it snappy!'" Only she keeps giving the punchline as "and make it quick!", or "and I want it right away!", or "and don't be a long time about it!"

* ''Manga/{{Bleach}}'': In the many SliceOfLife sketches Creator/TiteKubo does about his characters, there's one of [[TheStoic Byakuya]] doing a stand-up routine in front of a huge audience. He holds his [[HairDecorations kenseikan]] to his ear and pretends it's a telephone. The audience doesn't laugh. He gets an "I told you so" from Renji afterwards. On another occasion, Renji asks Byakuya which hairdresser he uses and Byakuya tells him he gets his [[EmpathicWeapon zanpakutou]] to [[DeathOfAThousandCuts cut]] his hair for him. Renji is so shocked, Byakuya has to tell him he was joking. Of course, Renji's then more panicked by the idea of Byakuya telling jokes. It's a RunningGag that Byakuya's very funny when he's not trying to be but an absolute disaster when he is.

* In ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'', Spades Slick attempts a [[BondOneLiner hard boiled one-liner]]::'

* People with [[UsefulNotes/HighFunctioningAutism autism]] are likely to find it hard to tell jokes in such a way that they are funny (or supposed to be) due to limited, if not absent, social skills.

* Lurkalot during his brief turn as jester in''Film/UpTheChastityBelt''. He tells an extremely unfunny joke then, when it fails to garner any laughs, he kills it entirely by overexplaining it.

* Lurkalot during his brief turn as jester in''Film/UpTheChastityBelt''. He tells an extremely unfunny joke then, when it fails to garner ant laughs, he kills it entirely by overexplaining it.

* In ''[[Series/TheMuppetShow The Muppet Show: Sex and Violence]]'', UsefulNotes/GeorgeWashington on Mount Rushmore is depicted like this

* ''[[Series/ILoveLucy Lucy]]'' was apparently unable to tell a joke. In one episode, she tried to tell about the lady who went to a butcher and asked for pork chops "and don't leave too much fat on them." The butcher replied, "Yes, ma'am. Which way?" Fred Mertz had heard the joke before and explained that the lady was supposed to say, "Be sure you make them lean." Lucy thought this was only a minor detail, when it was in fact the point of the joke. A mental health crisis followed when she felt isolated and rejected by the others.

* ''Film/TheIncrediblyStrangeCreaturesWhoStoppedLivingAndBecameMixedUpZombies'': The comedian in the nightclub is horrendous, especially his timing on the "my mother irons and my father steals" joke, which was really old even when this movie was made. {{Lampshaded}} when someone in the audience snickers prematurely.

** "Outside Joke" featured Davis and his utter incompetence at pulling {{Practical Joke}}s. [[spoiler:[[ObfuscatingStupidity Which turned out to]] ''[[ObfuscatingStupidity be]]'' [[ObfuscatingStupidity a practical joke he was playing on Karen that he got the whole town in on]]]].

** In "Mosquito Time", Hank says that the human brain can only hold so much information, and we are treated to a GhostInTheMachine CutawayGag showing two Hanks in a white void organizing cardboard boxes full of information. One tells the other to put a box of knock-knock jokes next to the Bananarama lyrics. Real!Hank then tries to tell Lacey a knock-knock joke, but when she says, "Who's there?", he says, "Bananarama". Back in Hank's brain, the stack of boxes has fallen over and all their contents have mixed together.

* Shouko Komi of ''Manga/KomiSanWaKomyushouDesu'' tries her hand at jokes in one chapter. Aside from the significant problem that Komi is a ShrinkingViolet who uses a notebook to communicate because she can't handle spoken conversations, she also favors "Dad Jokes" that nobody else finds funny to begin with.

** Similarly, Piccolo is also unable to tell a joke and refuses to make one, but Kaio took one of his lines as a hilariously bad joke and he ends up laughing anyway.

* In ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia'', Izuku is too nervous and jittery to ever be able to properly deliver a joke. This actually becomes a plot point when he tries to get an internship with All Might's former sidekick, Sir Nighteye, who insists that all of his employees have a keen sense of humor. The best Izuku can do is shape his face into a perfect pantomime of All Might's in hopes of getting a reaction.

* Setsuna in ''Anime/{{Negima}}''.

* Dug from ''WesternAnimation/{{Up}}''. Of course, it's possible his joke is hilarious to another dog...