History Literature / TheyAreSmol

* PhyrricVictory: A multilayered example is revealed in the second arc, which covers the first contact between humanity and their new neighbors. [[spoiler:Russia is revealed to have set up a kind of [[TakingYouWithMe retributive strike-type doomsday weapon]], where the destruction of the Kremlin causes the country's nuclear arsenal to launch... ''at Russia itself'', with the intent of both annihilating the enemy ground troops and wiping out Russia's infrastructure, so the enemy will gain little of value for having conquered the nation. Then the Kremlin gets destroyed when a Karnakian drop-pad ''accidentally'' crashes into it and the EMP triggers the doomsday weapon. For added irony, the Karnakians didn't ''want'' to hurt anybody. So the Russian's retribution weapon basically annihilated the country utterly needlessly. It's never elaborated on what Russia looked like after the aliens were finally able to patch things up, but it probably was the end of the old government.]]

* DoesNotKnowHisOwnStrength: The first guy on the scene when the Karnakians land ends up tripping when he approaches them. A Karnakian soldier tries to pull the man up by grabbing his arms at the shoulders...[[spoiler: and tearing his arms off. He gets better, and said Karnakian soldier is ''really'' sorry.]]

''[[https://theyaresmol.com/ They are Smol]]'' by TinyPrancingHorse is an ongoing WebSerialNovel that originated from the [[Website/{{Reddit}} HFY subreddit]].

The story takes place in the near future. After the first alien race to ever make contact with Earth [[AlienInvasion invades the planet and nearly destroys all of human society]] ''[[MikeNelsonDestroyerOfWorlds completely by accident]]'', the [[TheFederation Galactic Senate]] decides to uplift humanity as reparations. There are a few reasons why they make this decision - partly out of guilt, partly out of genuine kindness.

Mostly, though? It's because [[spoiler: [[CutenessProximity the aliens all think we're]] ''[[CutenessProximity adorable.]]'']]

* AndCallHimGeorge: A xeno can easily kill a human even while trying to gently pat one on the head. First Contact goes horribly awry when a Karnakian soldier tries gingerly lifting a human back to his feet and tears his arms clean off at the shoulders. Any alien who wants to be around humans must be specifically trained to be ''really'' careful.

* DisasterDominoes: Pretty much the entirety of the accidental invasion of Earth. It started with the Karnakians trying to say hello and give away free blankets, and ended with [[spoiler: [[NukeEm the nuclear apocalypse.]]]]

* HumanityIsInsane: Humans snapping under pressure features heavily in various parts of the story, often PlayedForLaughs. It apparently happens enough that the other sapient species of the Galactic Union eventually consider random bouts of insanity to be something that just happens to humans.
** Special mention has to go to the Human military, who are a straight ShoutOut to the [[TabletopGame/Warhammer40000 Angry Marines]].

* MistakenForRacist: [[spoiler: The human practice of producing {{gag dub}}s of alien films in order to make the people they feature feel less intimidating sparks some controversy when it's discovered.]]

* OverprotectiveDad: Amongst Dorarizin, ''both'' mothers and fathers consider it their socially obligated duty to put the fear of god into girls interested in dating their sons.

*** Caroline is quite literally, not one word of hyperbole, terrified that the FunWithSubtitles version of a Jornassian war movie she was watching will offend them enough that they'll want to kill her.
*** Bill goes temporarily insane when confronted with the Dorarizin crew trying to get him out of the [[GiantRobot construction drone]] his room-mate put him in for safekeeping after an emergency shower washed off all his scent markers. All the camera shows him is a horde of werewolves trying to break in, and his hind-brain instinctively shouts "They're going to eat me." This results in him turning the water main into an improvised riot hose.

* ShoutOut: Many, especially to TableTopGame/Warhammer40000:
** The UTF millitary are the Angry Marines in all but name.
** The alien races are called "xenos".
** Several spacecraft are referred to as barges.
** After a dying human doctor, Nick Silver, is intigrated into a medical robot, he starts wearing purity seals and talking about the Omnissiah.
*** after assuming this robot form Dr. Nick Silver insists on being called [[VideoGame/SonicTheHedgehog Doctor Robot-Nick]].

** After a dying human doctor is intigrated into a medical robot, he starts wearing purity seals and talking about the Omnissiah.

* SnakePeople: The Jornassians.

* TactfulTranslation: [[spoiler: The names all three alien species give to humans - both as a species and as individuals - turn out to be... less than dignified. The Dorarizin, Jornassian, and Karnakian words for human translate literally as, respectively, "tiny chomper", "warmcuddle", and "little-needs-protecting". Their
TranslatorMicrobes usually cover this up for human ears.]]

* WolfMan: the Dorarazin are wolf-like xenos the size of polar bears. Luckily our odor, and sometimes even our mere presence, triggers their parental instincts, not unlike how real dogs and cats have gained infantile traits to take advantage of humans' own nurturing instincts.

* FunWithSubtitles: The human government requires that any astronauts working with aliens spend at least 4 hours per day watching either human media, or an edit of one of their [[NoSuchThingAsAlienPopCulture host species' media]] that's had "[[Memes/OtherInternet Doge]]"-style subtitles added. This is, naturally, classified, because, since everyone else evolved from a vicious predator and we didn't, it would likely upset them if they knew. [[spoiler: It's a good thing we're cute.]]

The story takes place in the near future. After the first alien race to ever make contact with Earth [[AlienInvasion invades the planet and nearly destroys all of human society]] ''[[EpicFail by complete accident]]'', the [[TheFederation Galactic Senate]] decides to uplift humanity as reparations. There are a few reasons why they make this decision - partly out of guilt, partly out of genuine kindness.

* AwesomeAussie: the Australian cop who, either due to HeroicSecondWind, or possibly due to being possessed by the spirit of Steve Irwin, ends up flipping a Karnakian soldier.

* MoreDakka: See NoKillLikeOverkill below. Humans absolutely cannot win in a melee combat situation, against any of the other xeno races, even when the human is in a MiniMecha and the "opponent" is a frazzled Dorarizin medic just trying to do his job.

* TokenHuman: There's a waiting list of Xenos ships who want a single human crewman. The vetting process is strict. Every crew member has to be trained to properly interact with humans lest they accidentally crush their new crewmate's skull trying to gently pat them on the head. And the ship has to be retrofitted with a human-specific living quarters and several human-only escape rafts. It's worth it to most Xenos because to them we're basically Space Pandas (i.e. very rare and very adorable.)

* TactfulTranslation: [[spoiler: The names all three alien species give to humans - both as a species and as individuals - turn out to be... less than dignified. The Dorarizin, Jornassian, and Karnakian words for human translate literally as, respectively, "tiny chomper", "warmcuddle", and "little-needs-protecting". Their TranslatorMicrobes usually cover this up for human ears.]]

* MeaningfulName: Book 2 features a police ship named ''La Chancla,'' which means "A Sandal" in Mexican Spanish. This comes from the tradition of ''abuella'' (granny) whupping naughty kids with a sandal.

* AlienLunch: "They are Smol-and Thankful'' involves a Thanksgiving feast with Jornissian clams (it's hairy and eaten still-alive but at broiling temperature), Dorarizin sausage (which has a millionth of a percent moisture content and is cured with metallic sodium), and a Karnakian delicacy that consists of a live animal that tastes absolutely delicious, even to humans (which escapes and knocks the other two into the drinks cooler, which return to hunting mode and violently explode, respectively).

* HolidayEpisode: Book 2 covers several holidays, and why it's a bad idea to let aliens participate.

The story takes place in the near future. After the first alien race to ever make contact with Earth [[AlienInvasion invades the planet and nearly destroys all of human society]] ''[[EpicFail by complete accident]]'', the [[TheFederation Galactic Senate]] decides to uplift humanity as reparations. There are a few reasons why they make this decision. Partly out of guilt, partly out of genuine kindness. Mostly though? It's because [[spoiler: [[CutenessProximity the aliens all think we're]] ''[[CutenessProximity adorable.]]'']]

* TactfulTranslation: [[spoiler: The names all three alien species give to humans - both as a species and as individuals - turn out to be... less than dignified. The Dorarizins, Jornissians, and Karnakian words for human translate literally as, respectively, "tiny chomper", "warmcuddle", and "little-needs-protecting". Their TranslatorMicrobes usually cover this up for human ears.]]

* SnakePeople: The Jornissians.

The story takes place in the near future. After the first alien race to ever make contact with Earth [[AlienInvasion invades the planet and nearly destroys all of human society]] ''[[EpicFail by complete accident]]'', the [[TheFederation Galactic Senate]] decides to uplift humanity as reparations. There are a few reasons why they make this decision. Part of it is out of guilt. Part of it is out of genuine kindness.

Mostly though? It's because [[spoiler: [[CutenessProximity the aliens all think we're]] ''[[CutenessProximity adorable.]]'']]

* DisasterDominoes: Pretty much the entirety of the accidental invasion of Earth. It started with the Karnakians trying to say hello and give away free blankets and ended with [[spoiler: [[NukeEm the nuclear apocalypse.]]]]

* AlienLunch: "They are Smol-and Thankful'' involves a Thanksgiving feast with Jornissian clams (it's hairy and eaten still-alive but at broiling temperature), Dorarizin saussage (which has a millionth of a percent moisture content and is cured with metallic sodium), and a Karnakian delicacy that consists of a live animal that tastes absolutely delicious, even to humans (which escapes and knocks the other two into the drinks cooler, which return to hunting mode and violently explode, respectively).

** Defied. The Jornassians have a pantheon, the Karnakians have a wide variety of religeons which all accept the existance of souls and try to explain where they come from and what happens to it after death (all presided over by the Diarchs), and Dorarizins have ancestor-worship. There is some overlap among alien religeons. Among humans, Christianity's had a bit of a revival, and there was a period where Karnakians were worshipped, which ended when someone sacrificed a goat to them and they got a "very long talk about convergent evolution."
** The Karnakians have the ability to sense souls, and presumably have the ability (natural or not) to demonstrate their existance objectiveley. This would ensure that everyone would have a vested interest in keeping themselves safe in the hereafter, rather than just the here and now.

*** Caroline is quite literally, not one word of hyperbole, terrified that the FunWithSubtitles version of a Jornissian war movie she was watching will offend them enough that they'll want to kill her.

* OutgrownSuchSillySuperstitions: Defied. The Jornassians have a pantheon, the Karnakians monotheistic (but have many, many denominations of that religeon, similar to [=WH40K=]'s Imperium of Man) and Dorarizins have ancestor-worship. Among humans, Christianity's had a bit of a revival, and there was a period where Karnakians were worshipped, which ended when someone sacrificed a goat to them and they got a "very long talk about convergent evolution."