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-->'''Kanji:''' So I can talk about stories from my childhood? Or even stuff before that? ''[bringing his hands together and grinning]'' Because I have an interesting story about how I was born! [[TooMuchInformation So, about nine months before my birthday, Mom and Dad we're assigned to a mission somewhere in Hi no Kuni and they were wanting to experiment in bed and-]]\\
to:
-->'''Kanji:''' So I can talk about stories from my childhood? Or even stuff before that? ''[bringing his hands together and grinning]'' Because I have an interesting story about how I was born! [[TooMuchInformation [[FunnyConceptionStory So, about nine months before my birthday, Mom and Dad we're assigned to a mission somewhere in Hi no Kuni and they were wanting to experiment in bed and-]]\\
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* Right after Hinata makes it up the stairs following her fight, Naruto runs over to her, hugs her, and spins her around. Not only does this make her blush, but, given that she had been poisoned by Roto during her fight, her face turns into a mixture of red and blue, slowly becoming purple. Hinata tells him to put her down before she faints (although she doesn't know whether she would faint from the hug or the dizziness caused by the poison). Naruto does so and apologizes while rubbing his head in embarrassment.
to:
* Right after Hinata makes it up the stairs following her fight, Naruto runs over to her, hugs her, and spins her around. Not only does this make her blush, but, given that she had been poisoned by Roto during her fight, her face turns into a mixture of red and blue, slowly becoming purple. Hinata tells him to put her down before she faints (although she doesn't know whether she would faint from the hug or the dizziness caused by the poison). Naruto does so and apologizes while [[HandBehindHead rubbing his head in embarrassment.
embarrassment]].
Changed line(s) 205 (click to see context) from:
* [[DopeSlap Anko smacking Naruto]] on his head for loudly complaining about Sasuke having his fight before him.
to:
* [[DopeSlap Anko smacking Naruto]] Naruto on his head head]] for loudly complaining about Sasuke having his fight before him.
Changed line(s) 392 (click to see context) from:
* Hiruzen finds Anko in his office, sitting on his chair. She claims that his secretary let her in, but he correctly guesses that she snuck in there, with Anko rubbing her head sheepishly soon after:
to:
* Hiruzen finds Anko in his office, sitting on his chair. She claims that his secretary let her in, but he correctly guesses that she snuck in there, with Anko [[HandBehindHead rubbing her head head]] sheepishly soon after:
Changed line(s) 613 (click to see context) from:
'''Anko:''' ''[rubbing the back of her head while chuckling uneasily]'' Er...sorry. I got kinda excited. I should've probably asked if Hinata would come outside with me for a minute.
to:
'''Anko:''' ''[rubbing ''[[[HandBehindHead rubbing the back of her head head]] while chuckling uneasily]'' Er...sorry. I got kinda excited. I should've probably asked if Hinata would come outside with me for a minute.
Changed line(s) 638 (click to see context) from:
* Yoshino wants to repay Tsunade for agreeing to make Shikamaru her apprentice. Tsunade tries to say she doesn't have to, only for Jiraiya to say at the same time that they were about to eat. His former teammate glares at him while he sheepishly rubs the back of his head. Yoshino insists on cooking food for them and grabs Shizune's hand to drag her to her home. Shizune pleadingly looks at Tsunade, who then sighs and follows the two younger women:
to:
* Yoshino wants to repay Tsunade for agreeing to make Shikamaru her apprentice. Tsunade tries to say she doesn't have to, only for Jiraiya to say at the same time that they were about to eat. His former teammate glares at him while [[HandBehindHead he sheepishly rubs the back of his head.head]]. Yoshino insists on cooking food for them and grabs Shizune's hand to drag her to her home. Shizune pleadingly looks at Tsunade, who then sighs and follows the two younger women:
Changed line(s) 687 (click to see context) from:
* Naruto is greeted by an Anbu agent (who is heavily implied to be Yamato). The latter gives him a scroll and tells him that Jiraiya wishes to talk to him at Naruto's earliest convenience. The Uzumaki boy asks the Anbu how important is it. The man asks him if he has plans that are more important than seeing the Hokage. Even though the Anbu is wearing a mask, Naruto has a creeping sensation, as if the man's eyes behind his mask were somehow piercing his soul and judging him. The blond shinobi quickly shakes his head, only for the Anbu to chuckle and say that he's merely joking.
to:
* Naruto is greeted by an Anbu agent (who is heavily implied to be Tenzo AKA Yamato). The latter gives him a scroll and tells him that Jiraiya wishes to talk to him at Naruto's earliest convenience. The Uzumaki boy asks the Anbu how important is it. The man asks him if he has plans that are more important than seeing the Hokage. Even though the Anbu is wearing a mask, Naruto has a creeping sensation, as if the man's eyes behind his mask were somehow piercing his soul and judging him. The blond shinobi quickly shakes his head, only for the Anbu to chuckle and say that he's merely joking.
Changed line(s) 730 (click to see context) from:
* Naruto's students must find their sensei somewhere at the Uzumaki Clan compound as part of their test. Immediately after the Uzumaki boy disappears, Hanabi uses her Byakugan and easily finds him. When she and her teammates arrive to where Naruto is, Hanabi asks the latter if he designed the test like this even though he knows she has the Byakugan. He blushes and sheepishly rubs the back of his head, which is followed by Katsumi complaining that this is almost too easy. However, Naruto grabs a scroll from his jacket and uses it to summon one thousand shadow clones. After most of the clones leave the room, the remaining one at the center of the room smiles smugly at his students and asks them if they all actually thought he'd make it that easy on them. [[ObfuscatingStupidity In other words, Naruto pretended to make such an obvious mistake just to take his students by surprise.]]
to:
* Naruto's students must find their sensei somewhere at the Uzumaki Clan compound as part of their test. Immediately after the Uzumaki boy disappears, Hanabi uses her Byakugan and easily finds him. When she and her teammates arrive to where Naruto is, Hanabi asks the latter if he designed the test like this even though he knows she has the Byakugan. He blushes and [[HandBehindHead sheepishly rubs the back of his head, head]], which is followed by Katsumi complaining that this is almost too easy. However, Naruto grabs a scroll from his jacket and uses it to summon one thousand shadow clones. After most of the clones leave the room, the remaining one at the center of the room smiles smugly at his students and asks them if they all actually thought he'd make it that easy on them. [[ObfuscatingStupidity In other words, Naruto pretended to make such an obvious mistake just to take his students by surprise.]]
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'''Naruto:''' ''[rubbing his head sheepishly]'' You're right, I'm sorry. ''[looking at Sasuke, who is frowning at him]'' I'm sorry about that. Honestly, your hair looks good right now. It'll take some time getting used to it, but it looks good.\\
to:
'''Naruto:''' ''[rubbing ''[[[HandBehindHead rubbing his head sheepishly]'' sheepishly]]]'' You're right, I'm sorry. ''[looking at Sasuke, who is frowning at him]'' I'm sorry about that. Honestly, your hair looks good right now. It'll take some time getting used to it, but it looks good.\\
Changed line(s) 936 (click to see context) from:
** Not too long afterwards, Anko is confused to see the seal on Hinata's forehead and says she knows "that's not [her] Clan's Caged Bird bullshit" before asking what is that, making all three former-genin of Team 3 realize they have a lot to fill in for her.
to:
** Not too long afterwards, Anko is confused to see the seal on Hinata's forehead and says she knows "that's not [her] Clan's Caged Bird bullshit" before asking what is that, making all three former-genin of Team 3 realize they have a lot ''lot'' to fill in for her.
Changed line(s) 966 (click to see context) from:
''[Naruto and Fū freeze in place while Anko is leaking killing intent. They laugh nervously and rub the back of their heads.]''\\
to:
''[Naruto and Fū freeze in place while Anko is leaking killing intent. They laugh nervously and [[HandBehindHead rub the back of their heads.heads]].]''\\
Changed line(s) 978 (click to see context) from:
* Fū accidentally reveals to the Konoha shinobi a way to enter Taki. She rubs the back of her head sheepishly and recognizes her mistake before saying she assumes they're all fairly trustworthy and won't try and lead a Konoha invasion on her village:
to:
* Fū accidentally reveals to the Konoha shinobi a way to enter Taki. [[HandBehindHead She rubs the back of her head sheepishly sheepishly]] and recognizes her mistake before saying she assumes they're all fairly trustworthy and won't try and lead a Konoha invasion on her village:
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'''Naruto:''' ''[scowling at his best friend]'' ... Hey! I'm the one who asked her out, y'know?\\
to:
'''Naruto:''' ''[scowling at his best friend]'' ...BestFriend]'' ... Hey! I'm the one who asked her out, y'know?\\
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** The next day, Naruto walks into the room, eager to see what kind of shape Shikamaru must be in after a night of being tortured by Kurotsuchi. However, he's shocked to see the two of them asleep, the boy underneath the covers and the girl on top of them, while also cuddling each other. Leaving the room, Naruto grins as he found "the perfect blackmail".
to:
** The next day, Naruto walks into the room, eager to see what kind of shape Shikamaru must be in after a night of being tortured by Kurotsuchi. However, he's shocked to see [[ClingySleepers the two of them asleep, the boy underneath the covers and the girl on top of them, while also cuddling each other.other]]. Leaving the room, Naruto grins as he found "the perfect blackmail".
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* Before being awakened by the Raikage, Jiraiya is having a perverted dream and clearly having a lot of fun with it.
to:
* Before being awakened by the Raikage, Jiraiya is having a perverted dream an EroticDream and clearly having a lot of fun with it.
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[[folder:Chapters 91-98: Danzō Pursuit/ROOT's Last Stand Arc]]
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!!Chapter 98
* When Shikamaru, Dosu, Susumu, and Tayuya are about to leave Iwa, Rōshi smirks and says "Tell that Perverted Hokage of yours to fuck off for me, alright? And tell him that Tengoku no Sato is currently ''outselling'' his most recent version of Icha Icha Filth!":
-->'''Susumu:''' ''[nervously chuckling]'' We'll... er... make sure Godaime-sama gets the message.
** Shikamaru and Kurotsuchi have a romantic moment where they say a few things and hug each other. Roto smirks and tells them to not make out in public, only for the Tsuchikage to [[FlippingTheBird give him the bird]] and give a deep kiss to her boyfriend.
* At the Hokage's office, Koharu and Homura open the door and walk in. Jiraiya asks them to knock next time, only for Koharu to frown and point out [[HypocriticalHumor it's rather hypocritical for him to say that]].
* Etoro and Metoro once again bickering, this time after being reverse summoned by Tagitsuhime.
** Etoro smirks upon seeing Hidan's scythe and asks him if it's CompensatingForSomething or if it's just 'absolutely necessary' to have something like that for his fighting style. Needless to say, Hidan is not in a good mood upon hearing that.
[[/folder]]
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* Upon seeing Kido doing a technique that requires the Kyūbi's chakra, Kurama comments that he never considered using a technique like that one, but also that he thinks it's possible he could do it. However, his speech is interrupted by Naruto hissing at him and telling him it's not the right time to be inspired by their opponent.
!!Chapter 96
* Once again, Kurama is told by Naruto that it's not the right time when the former comments over how Kido is unable to do things that the fox can do.
!!Chapter 96
* Once again, Kurama is told by Naruto that it's not the right time when the former comments over how Kido is unable to do things that the fox can do.
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!!Chapter 95
* After being attacked by Fū, Maguire complains that she shattered his favorite pair of glasses, making her roll her eyes and say "Oh. I ruined your favorite pair of glasses. [[SarcasmMode How will I live with myself?]]"
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Changed line(s) 128 (click to see context) from:
** Shikamaru declines Kurotsuchi's offer to accompany her while she's visiting Konoha as he wants to take a nap. This annoys her and she demands that he stops being a "lazy ass" and shows her around his "damn village" before grabbing him by the shoulder and walking off.
to:
** Shikamaru declines Kurotsuchi's offer to accompany her while she's visiting Konoha as he wants to take a nap. This annoys her and she demands that he stops being a "lazy ass" and shows her around his "damn village" before grabbing him by the shoulder and walking off.off:
Changed line(s) 131 (click to see context) from:
* After Naruto snatches one of the forms from Anko, [[DopeSlap she smacks him in the head]].
to:
* After Naruto snatches one of the forms from Anko, [[DopeSlap she smacks him in the head]].head]]:
Changed line(s) 147 (click to see context) from:
** Later, Kurenai scares a genin named Asuna Kariudo by casting a genjutsu on the latter and making her see several deadly stuff from the Forest of Death.
to:
** Later, Kurenai scares a genin named Asuna Kariudo by casting a genjutsu on the latter and making her see several deadly stuff from the Forest of Death.Death:
Changed line(s) 194 (click to see context) from:
** After the fight is over, how do Lee and Gai celebrate the former's victory? By [[SayMyName shouting each other's names]] and doing so [[BrokenRecord over and over again]].
to:
** After the fight is over, how do Lee and Gai celebrate the former's victory? By [[SayMyName shouting each other's names]] and doing so [[BrokenRecord over and over again]].again]]:
Changed line(s) 215 (click to see context) from:
* Following his fight against Tenten, Naruto receives a hug from Hinata, the latter telling him that he did great out there. Naruto blushes and returns the hug, thanking her for that. [[ShipperOnDeck Shikamaru]] then tells them to break it up and refrain from their public display of affection. This makes Hinata realize what she's doing and she pulls away while heavily blushing, with Naruto also having a similar blushing face.
to:
* Following his fight against Tenten, Naruto receives a hug from Hinata, the latter telling him that he did great out there. Naruto blushes and returns the hug, thanking her for that. [[ShipperOnDeck Shikamaru]] then tells them to break it up and refrain from their public display of affection. This makes Hinata realize what she's doing and she pulls away while heavily blushing, with Naruto also having a similar blushing face.face:
Changed line(s) 263 (click to see context) from:
** Naruto expresses how much he missed Hinata and Shikamaru during this month of training by doing a GroupHug with them. Once again, Shikamaru complains about how the hug is too tight. Much to his chagrin, not only does Naruto respond by tightening the hug, but so does Hinata.
to:
** Naruto expresses how much he missed Hinata and Shikamaru during this month of training by doing a GroupHug with them. Once again, Shikamaru complains about how the hug is too tight. Much to his chagrin, not only does Naruto respond by tightening the hug, but so does Hinata.Hinata:
Changed line(s) 288 (click to see context) from:
* Ino loudly cheering for Shino. Too loudly in fact for Asuma, who's worried for his ears. Things get worse for him when Choji loudly cheers for both Shino and Shikamaru.
to:
* Ino loudly cheering for Shino. Too loudly in fact for Asuma, who's worried for his ears. Things get worse for him when Choji loudly cheers for both Shino and Shikamaru.Shikamaru:
Changed line(s) 388 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Jirayia:''' ''[sharply and scowling]'' You. Me. Training ground forty-three. Right now.\\
to:
Changed line(s) 392 (click to see context) from:
* Hiruzen finds Anko in his office, sitting on his chair. She claims that his secretary let her in, but he correctly guesses that she snuck in there, with Anko rubbing her head sheepishly soon after.
to:
* Hiruzen finds Anko in his office, sitting on his chair. She claims that his secretary let her in, but he correctly guesses that she snuck in there, with Anko rubbing her head sheepishly soon after.after:
Changed line(s) 399 (click to see context) from:
* Hinata expresses some concern over being on a boat given that her father got really sick from a boat ride during the first time he had a mission that was this far from Konoha. Shikamaru chuckles while thinking about Hiashi being bent over on the side of a boat and says that his father would find it hilarious. Hinata immediately begs him to not say anything about it to Shikaku, as her father would not like it if anybody knew what happened to him. The Nara boy tells her their fathers don't talk unless they have business with each other and his father is unlikely to bring up that subject to Hiashi.
to:
* Hinata expresses some concern over being on a boat given that her father got really sick from a boat ride during the first time he had a mission that was this far from Konoha. Shikamaru chuckles while thinking about Hiashi being bent over on the side of a boat and says that his father would find it hilarious. Hinata immediately begs him to not say anything about it to Shikaku, as her father would not like it if anybody knew what happened to him. The Nara boy tells her their fathers don't talk unless they have business with each other and his father is unlikely to bring up that subject to Hiashi.Hiashi:
Changed line(s) 402 (click to see context) from:
* Haku makes an appearance in this chapter. Just like Naruto did in canon, the Konoha shinobi [[DudeLooksLikeALady mistake him for a girl]] and [[UnsettlingGenderReveal are shocked when he reveals that he's actually a boy]]. After Haku leaves, Dosu comments that he was much prettier than any girl he had ever met. As for Hinata, she blushes when she remembers that she was jealous of Haku's natural looks the first time she saw him
to:
* Haku makes an appearance in this chapter. Just like Naruto did in canon, the Konoha shinobi [[DudeLooksLikeALady mistake him for a girl]] and [[UnsettlingGenderReveal are shocked when he reveals that he's actually a boy]]. After Haku leaves, Dosu comments that he was much prettier than any girl he had ever met. As for Hinata, she blushes when she remembers that she was jealous of Haku's natural looks the first time she saw himhim:
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* Anko is rather annoyed when she learns she has to work with Misora Kawada, given how much she disliked the latter when she met her during the meeting.
to:
* Anko is rather annoyed when she learns she has to work with Misora Kawada, given how much she disliked the latter when she met her during the meeting.meeting:
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* Shikamaru is confused when Hotaru suggests to Utakata that everyone present should all eat lunch together after Utakata tried to kill Ao. He's even more confused when Utakata agrees to that.
to:
* Shikamaru is confused when Hotaru suggests to Utakata that everyone present should all eat lunch together after Utakata tried to kill Ao. He's even more confused when Utakata agrees to that.that:
Changed line(s) 447,448 (click to see context) from:
* Sai is introduced in this chapter. When he notices that Naruto isn't paying attention to what Jiraiya is saying, he tells him "Hey dickless, the commander is speaking. You should stop zoning out." Naruto is about to angrily respond to him before realizing that his godfather is indeed speaking to the army.
to:
* Sai is introduced in this chapter. When he notices that Naruto isn't paying attention to what Jiraiya is saying, he tells him "Hey "[[BrutalHonesty Hey dickless, the commander is speaking. You should stop zoning out." ]]" Naruto is about to angrily respond to him before realizing that his godfather is indeed speaking to the army.
Changed line(s) 479 (click to see context) from:
** [[ShipperOnDeck Haku]] says to Naruto that Hinata has said a lot about him and asks him if Hinata got a chance to talk to him about anything. Remembering what she told to Haku on the boat, Hinata widens her eyes and blushes before quickly rushing to him and [[HandGagging covering his mouth with her hands]].
to:
** [[ShipperOnDeck Haku]] says to Naruto that Hinata has said a lot about him and asks him if Hinata got a chance to talk to him about anything. Remembering what she told to Haku on the boat, Hinata widens her eyes and blushes before quickly rushing to him and [[HandGagging covering his mouth with her hands]].hands]]:
Changed line(s) 792,793 (click to see context) from:
'''Jiraiya:''' It's not smut; it's erotic literature, and a high-quality level one too- ''[stopping mid-sentence and shaking his head]'' Never mind, I'm not even going to bother. I know you don't care.
to:
'''Jiraiya:''' [[InsistentTerminology It's not smut; it's erotic literature, literature]], and a high-quality level one too- ''[stopping mid-sentence and shaking his head]'' Never mind, I'm not even going to bother. I know you don't care.
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** When Fū explains what she remembers during her fight after going version two.
to:
** When Fū explains what she remembers during her fight after going version two.two:
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!!Chapter 93
* At the beginning of the fight between Sakura and Sai:
-->'''Sai:''' ''[with a small smile]'' [[BrutalHonesty Wow, I didn't realize that the Hokage was going to send such an ugly opponent to fight me.]]\\
'''Sakura:''' ''[her eyes twitching in irritation]'' Who the hell do you think are you? I'm not ugly!
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* At the gates of Konoha, Kotetsu and Izumo check the documents given to them by Yoshikane Hyuga that would justify him leaving the village with an escort made up of ANBU agents for a diplomatic mission (which is just one big lie to help Danzō). Yoshikane tells them to hurry up and that he and his 'escort' are already behind schedule because one of them was late. He then looks at one of the ANBU agents and says:
to:
* At the gates of Konoha, Kotetsu and Izumo check the documents given to them by Yoshikane Hyuga that would justify him leaving the village with an escort made up of ANBU ROOT agents for a diplomatic mission (which is just one big lie to help Danzō). Yoshikane tells them to hurry up and that he and his 'escort' are already behind schedule because one of them was late. He then looks at one of the ANBU ROOT agents and says:
Changed line(s) 1241 (click to see context) from:
** Several minutes later, Kotetsu and Izumo allow Yoshikane and his 'escort' to leave Konoha. After the Hyuga and the ANBU agents are out of range of sensors:
to:
** Several minutes later, Kotetsu and Izumo allow Yoshikane and his 'escort' to leave Konoha. After the Hyuga and the ANBU ROOT agents are out of range of sensors:
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!!Chapter 91
* Jiraiya ends up in a clearing to talk to Itachi. However, both Naruto and Hinata soon arrive, with the former asking his godfather what is he doing there. He claims he's just enjoying nature, but the Uzumaki narrows his eyes and asks "You were going somewhere private to work on one of those pervy books, weren't you?" Jiraiya then has a perverted grin and expresses some eagerness in doing so, only to be interrupted by Hinata (who's blushing and shaking her head over what the Hokage is saying).
* Omake 12:
** When Tayuya suggests having Kurotsuchi as Han's girlfriend, the new Tsuchikage widens her eyes in horror, while both Risho and Roto also have negative reactions.
** Tayuya explains her idea, only for Kurotsuchi to shake her head and mumble "You're... actually being serious. This is actually a serious suggestion..."
** Kurotsuchi angrily reminds Tayuya that Han was her jōnin-sensei. The Uzumaki argues while smirking that it's irrelevant given they're both adults and Kurotsuchi is now the Tsuchikage, meaning their whole dynamic will not only shift, but could do so in a romantic way. However, Risho points out that Han is fourteen years older than Kurotsuchi. While Tayuya argues that age difference doesn't matter that much given that these two are both adults, Roto adds while shivering that fourteen years is a bit much, especially given that Han knew Kurotsuchi when she was twelve.
** Kurotsuchi then angrily reminds Tayuya of another thing, all while having some killing intent radiating from her body:
--->'''Kurotsuchi:''' '''I AM ALREADY IN A RELATIONSHIP AND AM IN LOVE WITH SHIKAMARU! WHY THE HELL WOULD I BREAK UP WITH HIM TO DATE MY GODDAMN SENSEI?'''\\
'''Tayuya:''' ''[rubbing her ears and frowning]'' Oww... You don't have to be so loud.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' '''THEN DON'T MAKE STUPID SUGGESTIONS!'''
** In response to this, Tayuya says she doesn't think Shikamaru would mind it and that he "knows [Kurotsuchi] needs an Iwa lover when he's back in Konoha." The new Tsuchikage asks her "Excuse me?" while her eyebrow rises, which is followed by:
--->'''Tayuya:''' ''[grinning]'' Besides, you two always struck me as kinky motherfuckers. I ''really'' don't think he'd mind, just as long as you invited 'Han-sensei' to bed the next time you two go at it.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[feeling the urge of vomitting]'' '''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis What. The. Fuck?]]'''
** However, Roto makes the mistake of asking Kurotsuchi if the latter and Shikamaru are really that kinky in bed. Her killing intent is now aimed at him and she angrily yells "'''I AM NOT DISCUSSING MY SEX LIFE WITH YOU THREE! HELL NO! END OF DISCUSSION!'''" That reaction causes Roto to pass out on the floor in fright:
--->'''Risho:''' ''[thinking, shaking his head, and {{facepalm}}ing]'' That fucking idiot... That's a thought that you keep to yourself...
* Omake 13:
** Kurotsuchi angrily suggests to have Tayuya become Han's girlfriend instead. The Uzumaki says that [[HypocriticalHumor she's not interested in men who are more than ten years older than her]]. Naturally, the new Tsuchikage is furious over her hypocrisy and loudly calls her out on it.
** Smirking, Risho agrees and comes up with a few arguments supporting Kurotsuchi's idea. Tayuya points out that she's always on the move and thus wouldn't make a good girlfriend for Han. Smirking as well, Kurotsuchi points out that, as Tsuchikage, she could appoint Han in charge of Iwa's spy network:
--->'''Kurotsuchi:''' And I could just have him work directly with Konoha's 'spy master'. Have him work 'very close' with her, if you know what I mean.\\
'''Tayuya:''' ''[shaking her head]'' No. I don't.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[her smirk widening]'' I meant-\\
'''Tayuya:''' ''[clapping her hands]'' Read between my lips. '''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis Not. Happening.]]'''\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' '''WELL, THEN READ MY LIPS. IT. WON'T. HAPPEN. FOR. ME. EITHER!'''\\
'''Tayuya:''' '''FINE!'''
** In response to that, Risho moves his eyes back-and-forth between Kurotsuchi and Tayuya while wondering "What the fuck did I just watch?"
!!Chapter 92
* At the gates of Konoha, Kotetsu and Izumo check the documents given to them by Yoshikane Hyuga that would justify him leaving the village with an escort made up of ANBU agents for a diplomatic mission (which is just one big lie to help Danzō). Yoshikane tells them to hurry up and that he and his 'escort' are already behind schedule because one of them was late. He then looks at one of the ANBU agents and says:
-->'''Yoshikane:''' Looking at you, Tsumiki Kido.\\
'''Kido:''' ''[{{facepalm}}ing]'' Zip it, geezer.
** Several minutes later, Kotetsu and Izumo allow Yoshikane and his 'escort' to leave Konoha. After the Hyuga and the ANBU agents are out of range of sensors:
--->'''Kido:''' Was that comment necessary?\\
'''Yoshikane:''' ''[hissing]'' Fuck you.\\
'''Kido:''' ''[sighing]'' ... I'll take that as a yes.
** Given that Kido was the one who threatened Yoshikane earlier in this chapter if he wasn't willing to help Danzō, it seems like that comment served as a little payback on the Hyuga's part.
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* The Omake:
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* The Omake:Omake 1:
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* The Omake:
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* The Omake:Omake 2:
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[[folder:Chapters 77-90: Shimogakure/Iwagakure Arc]]
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[[/folder]]
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!!Chapter 90
* Tayuya grumbling over the toads always giving her the same lecture about how non-summoners should not be allowed to use them like this.
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!!Chapter 87
* Tayuya and Gamakichi having an argument over the former summoning the latter despite not being a toad summoner.
* When seeing Naruto again, Gamakichi tells him to summon him more instead of Gamaken, calling the latter "a boring dude."
* While eating and talking to his brother Akemi at their house, Roto says the word "shit". Their mother, Keiko, tells him "Roto, we're at the table. No swearing." in response. This causes Roto to immediately have a shiver down his spine and say "Yes Mom."
** Shikamaru remembers when Roto said he fished during the Tenchi Bridge mission:
--->'''Roto:''' ''[chuckling]'' You remember from back then? Dude, that was years ago and we all hated each other back then. Good times.\\
'''Risho:''' ''[slightly rolling his eyes]'' [[SarcasmMode Ah yes, getting jumped by S-Rank missing ninja and nearly dying on one of our first missions out of the village. Good times indeed.]]\\
'''Roto:''' [[CurseCutShort F-]] ''[noticing his mother's look towards him and shaking his head]'' Shove off Risho.
** Roto's sister Takara comments that she was hoping her brother would have gotten together with Kurotsuchi, saying that the latter would have been an amazing sister:
--->'''Roto:''' ''[shaking his head]'' ... Exactly, Takara. Kurotsuchi makes an amazing sister. Dating her would be weird.
** Keiko mentions that Roto would always talk about how Hinata is the most beautiful girl he had ever met:
--->'''Shikamaru:''' ''[chuckling]'' Oh yeah. I forgot you had a thing for her.\\
'''Risho:''' ''[smirking]'' He still does.\\
''[Roto [[FlippingTheBird raises his middle finger]], only to drop the gesture upon seeing his mother scowling at him and he shakes his head instead.]''\\
'''Roto:''' ''[crossing his arms]'' I mean, course I liked her. And of course I still do; she's phenomenal. But ''nooooo'', of course she and Naruto got together. ''[raising his eyebrow towards Shikamaru]'' They're still together, right?\\
'''Dosu:''' They are.\\
'''Roto:''' ''[shaking his head and sighing]'' Dammit.
* Onoki and Rōshi bantering in the former's office.
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!!Chapter 86
* Shikamaru laughing over learning that Kurotsuchi, Roto, Risho, and Tayuya have been trying to find a girlfriend for Han. He then says that Naruto is going to die laughing when he'll tell him all of this, only for Kurotsuchi to tell her boyfriend while grinning "You better save it till I'm there; I wanna break it to him too!"
** When Kurotsuchi says that Onoki is ruthless as an instructor and he doesn't let her slack off, Shikamaru chuckles and, while faking a shiver, says that it "[s]ounds horrible", only for his girlfriend to frown and tap his shoulder while saying "To you, lazy ass!"
** Not too long afterwards, the two of them come across her father Kitsuchi. Naturally, given his previous meeting with him, Shikamaru is rather nervous upon meeting him again. He then nearly chokes when Kurotsuchi's father suggests training with him instead of observing her training. Having no idea about their previous meeting, Kurotsuchi is in favor of it and grins while commenting that Shikamaru can get the chance to get to know her father, causing her boyfriend to think about how that's the last thing he wants at this moment.
** When Shikamaru and Kurotsuchi go their separate ways, the former wonders why did he agree to train with Kitsuchi and hopes it isn't an elaborate excuse for her father to kill him while they're alone.
* 'Yamafū' complaining about his nickname, causing the other Fū to giggle and think about how it's such a petty complaint coming from an emotionless person.
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!!Chapter 85
* Onoki banging his head hard on his desk and complaining to himself over Konoha shinobi requesting to meet him, as it will likely start a brand new pile of paperwork right after he was done with the paperwork he was slacking on.
** Onoki asks Kitsuchi to escort the Konjiri Brothers to T&I. Kitsuchi grabs the two brothers and is about to leave the room, only to stop in his tracks and focus his eyes on Shikamaru. The latter is confused and eventually unnerved by that. This awkward moment is then interrupted by Etoro taunting Kitsuchi, doing so by asking him "Does the golem here not know how to walk? Is something this freakishly big unable to move?"
** Shikamaru being horrified when Onoki reveals that Kitsuchi is ''Kurotsuchi's father''. By contrast, the Tsuchikage is quite amused by the Nara's reaction, laughing at the latter's expense.
* Tayuya and Roto having a disagreement when the former wants Han to come to Konoha with her after tasting the food he cooked. Roto tells her she's "not stealing his amazing cooking", causing Han to chuckle and comment that food is what's most desired about his company and not his actual company itself. This is followed by Kurotsuchi saying that she and Risho want Han to stay in Iwa because he's the best jōnin-sensei ever, which makes Tayuya roll her eyes and call the Tsuchikage's granddaughter a suck-up.
** When Shikamaru and his group enter Han's house:
--->'''Tayuya:''' ''[to Shikamaru while chuckling]'' Lazy fuck, the hell are you doing here? And you brought Dosu and Susumu with you, huh?\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[grinning]'' Hey, Shikamaru's not a lazy fuck. He's ''[[InsistentTerminology Lazy Ass]]''. Anko, Naruto, and I confirmed that together!\\
'''Shikamaru:''' ''[rolling his eyes]'' You think you're so funny.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[giving him a thumbs-up]'' Hell yeah I am; I'm fucking hysterical.
* When Shikamaru enters Kurotsuchi's bedroom for the first time, the first thing he immediately does is rush over to her bed and collapse onto it, sighing and nearly moaning over being on a bed:
-->'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[rolling her eyes]'' Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Some things never change with you, huh?\\
'''Shikamaru:''' I hate camping out in the woods for nights. Sleeping bags are fine, but they're not beds. Nothing beats a bed. And you have a really soft feeling bed. I may not wake up at all tomorrow.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[pouting]'' That'd be a problem, mister! You literally just got here; I can't have you literally sleep the entire day away, especially since I'll be busy in the nighttime!\\
'''Shikamaru:''' ''[opening his eyes as he looks up at her and nods his head]'' Promise. I'll be awake. Just for you.\\
'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[chuckling]'' Heh. Good.
* The First Omake:
** This omake begins with Sasuke calling Fū Yamanaka by his first name, causing some confusion as the other Fū (the one from Taki) thinks he's talking to her.
** One minute later, the group has an argument, leading to them deciding to give a nickname to Kanji's brother so there would be no more confusion. Naruto suggests calling him "Orangey" because of his orange hair:
--->'''Katsumi:''' Naruto-sensei, don't take this the wrong way, but that sounds stupid.\\
'''Naruto:''' ''[crossing his arms]'' ... Hmph. Well, what name do you think?\\
'''Katsumi:''' ''[blinking]'' Um... Uh... m-maybe Fūman, because he's Fū, but this one is a guy-\\
'''Naruto:''' ''[rolling his eyes]'' Okay, you can't criticize me if that's the best name you got! That's even worse than mine!
** Kanji has a grin while explaining that his brother was "an emotional, easy to anger person" when they were younger. Therefore, he suggests calling him "[[PunnyName Fūrious]]", only to be immediately interrupted by [[LamePunReaction Katsumi angrily making it clear she doesn't want his nickname to be a pun]].
** Hinata suggests calling him "Yamafū". She explains that it combines part of his last name with his first name, and it also has the kanji for 'mountain' and 'wind'. Everyone agrees with that nickname, except for Kanji's brother himself. While the group continues to travel, [[NotSoStoic the ROOT agent is scowling and complaining in his mind over that nickname]].
* The Second Omake:
** At Han's house, Tayuya suggests to Kurotsuchi, Risho, and Roto the idea of having Susumu dating Han. Kurotsuchi asks her what's her logic with Susumu:
--->'''Tayuya:''' ''[grinning]'' Okay, hear me out. Han's an artist right?\\
''[The three Iwa shinobi look at all the paintings and scrolls that Han himself created surrounding them, which they knew Tayuya knew he did.]''\\
'''Risho:''' ''[[[DeadpanSnarker deadpanned]]]'' [[SarcasmMode No. I didn't know that. Interesting revelation.]]\\
'''Tayuya:''' ''[rolling her eyes]'' Ah bite me.
** Tayuya says that Susumu is also an artist. Kurotsuchi acknowledges that and asks "What else?" However, the Konoha shinobi says nothing else and simply grins. This causes all three Iwa shinobi to {{facepalm}} at the same time as they realize it's her ''only'' argument. They then have an argument about it, making Risho conclude that Tayuya has never been in a relationship before.
** Han arrives in the room, only to be asked by Roto if he likes men. Tayuya yells "ROTO, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU DO THIS?" in her mind while nearly pulling out all of her hair. Han is confused by it and asks for the context, only to chuckle and says he has "never found men particularly attracting" when Roto asks if he's sexually interested in men:
--->'''Roto:''' So you're attracted to women, then?\\
'''Han:''' Yes- ''[his eyes widening in realization before [[{{Facepalm}} bringing his palm to his face]]]'' I am not interested in a relationship, dammit! Quit this foolishness already.
** After getting confirmation that Han is not gay, Risho admits while chuckling that it's a shame because he thought Kitsuchi would have been a good match:
--->'''Kurotsuchi:''' ''[chocking]'' ... My father? ''[narrowing her eyes on Risho]'' Why the hell would you think ''my stick in the mud, boring father'' would be a good match for Han-sensei?\\
'''Risho:''' ''[shrugging his shoulders]'' Your father's a quiet, serious man. Han-sensei would approve of that. Also-\\
'''Roto:''' Look, let's just move on, okay? To someone else? ''[his eyes narrowing on Tayuya]'' And when you suggest a woman for Han-sensei, I hope you'll do better than simply suggesting another person who likes art.\\
''[[[FlippingTheBird She raises her middle finger at him.]]]''
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!!Chapter 84
* Jiraiya, Hinata, and Fū are interrogating Torune after the latter wakes up. However, he keeps answering "I have no identity." whenever he's asked a question. This eventually leads to what follows:
-->'''Jiraiya:''' Were you trying to create a war with Kumo? Or was something else the reason? What benefit does Danzō get from this?\\
'''Torune:''' I have no reasons.\\
'''Fū:''' ''[frowning]'' ... Can you say anything other than that?\\
'''Torune:''' I have no reason to.\\
'''Fū:''' ''[crossing her arms]'' ... Well, you're a smartass.
* When Kanji thanks his teammates and Naruto for cheering him up:
-->'''Katsumi:''' No need to thank us, Kanji. It's all the truth. Cause you're a cool guy. Even though your puns suck.\\
'''Kanji:''' H-Heh. My... My puns... are the best thing about this team. Y-You know you love them.\\
'''Katsumi:''' ''[crossing her arms]'' I draw a line somewhere in our friendship, Kanji. That's the line.\\
'''Kanji:''' Boring.\\
''[Team 9 laugh together in response.]''
* Roto tries to describe Risho's cousin Kusari to Tayuya. He does so by asking her if she ever met Risho "before Naruto pulled the stick out of his ass". This causes his teammate to immediately [[FlippingTheBird raise his middle finger]], with Tayuya snorting.
** Kurotsuchi thanks Tayuya for sharing important information about the Suzumebachi, leading to this:
--->'''Tayuya:''' ''[grinning]'' Of course I'd help out. Any friend of Naruto's is a friend of mine. And you all are pretty cool fucking people. Even Risho, now that he's not an ass!\\
'''Risho:''' ''[raising his middle finger again]'' Oh fuck off, you weren't even there back then to comment on that!\\
'''Roto:''' ''[grinning]'' SEE?! EVEN SHE AGREES!\\
'''Risho:''' You can fuck off too!
* At the end of the chapter, we once again have Etoro and Metoro bickering, putting the blame on each other over their capture. This causes Dosu to complain that their bickering makes his "sound ninjutsu feel tame in comparison", while Susumu comments that his daughter behaves herself better than the two criminals:
-->'''Susumu:''' ''[to the Konjiki Brothers]'' Are you both elite jōnin-level missing ninja or belligerent academy students?
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!!Chapter 83
* Before being awakened by the Raikage, Jiraiya is having a perverted dream and clearly having a lot of fun with it.
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!!Chapter 82
* Naruto and Hinata remembers when the former lost control of the Kyūbi during their first C-rank mission. The Uzumaki says that Han was there to talk to him about it. Hinata then has the idea of asking another jinchūriki to talk to Fū in regards to her losing control of Chōmei. Naruto thinks about sending a toad to deliver a message to Han, only for his girlfriend to tilt her head in confusion and points out that both Killer Bee and Yugito are jinchūriki currently present in Shimo. The Uzumaki then {{facepalm}}s and chuckles over his mistake.
* Etoro and Metoro bickering after they've been captured by Shikamaru, Dosu, and Susumu.
* When Killer Bee asks Naruto about having a beer together, the Uzumaki sheepishly admits he doesn't drink much, only to be immediately interrupted by Bee grabbing him and dragging him to the nearest pub he could find.
* Fū being confused when Yugito pulls out a carrot stick and tells her to eat it:
-->'''Fū:''' ''[blinking]'' What?\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[inching the carrot forward]'' Eat one.\\
'''Fū:''' ''[blinking again]'' Uh... why?\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[rolling her eyes and inching the carrot forward]'' You need to eat something and they're good for your health. Come on; eat it\\
'''Fū:''' ''[crossing her arms and frowning]'' ... No-\\
'''Yugito:''' Did I give you an option on that? Or do you need a demonstration? A carrot is a slightly harder vegetable than most. You take the carrot stick and-\\
'''Fū:''' Ugh, I know how to eat a carrot dammit! ''[rolling her eyes before snatching the carrot and taking a bite]'' Happy, Mom?\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[her eye twitching]'' I am, but would be happier if you never called me that again.\\
'''Fū:''' ''[grinning]'' Sure thing, Mom.\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[gritting her teeth]'' Cheeky little shit...
** When Fū explains what she remembers during her fight after going version two.
--->'''Fū:''' All I remember was feeling pissed off. All I wanted was to smash Bee's head.\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[chuckling]'' Yeah, but he's Killer Bee. I want to smash his head right now. The challenge is to try and have a serious conversation with him where you ''don't'' want to smash his head in.
** Fū is concerned that what she did when she blanked out and was in a state of wanting to kill Bee would justify everything the Taki villagers said about her. However, Yugito points out that it doesn't justify it unless she was still planning on killing Bee and some of the other shinobi in Shimo:
--->'''Yugito:''' Are you planning on killing him?\\
'''Fū:''' ''[shaking her head and frowning]'' No.\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[her smile widening]'' Cause if you were, I'd help.\\
'''Fū:''' ''[snorting in laughter]'' Oh my god. He's not that bad, stop saying stuff like that! I'm starting to think you actually want to kill him!\\
'''Yugito:''' ''[rolling her eyes]'' I'm kidding.
** Fū asking Yugito if the latter is always hyper serious and if she actually goes out and does things for fun, and then asking if Yugito is actually a real person. This only puts the latter in a bad mood, causing the Taki jinchūriki to have a laughing fit.
* The Omake:
** Tayuya tries to find a girlfriend for Han. However, her first idea is Suzumebachi Kamizuru. She talks about it to Kurotsuchi, Roto, and Risho. Understandably, the latter three are against this idea.
** Roto explains to Tayuya that Han's biggest issue with people is when they think too highly of themselves. He then says "I mean, look at how he handled Risho back when he had a stick up his ass!", causing Risho to [[FlippingTheBird raise his middle finger]].
** Han learns about Tayuya's idea of Suzumebachi being his girlfriend. He {{facepalm}}s and asks if this is a joke before telling the Uzumaki to not make suggestions ever again.
