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* From the book ''Our Dumb Century'':
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* From the book ''Our Dumb Century'':''Literature/OurDumbCentury'':
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** "[[CandidCamera Allen Funt]] Lets Kennedy In On Hilarious 'Cuban Missile Crisis' Prank"
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** "[[CandidCamera "[[Series/CandidCamera Allen Funt]] Lets Kennedy In On Hilarious 'Cuban Missile Crisis' Prank"
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* In 2010, the Seattle Seahawks became the first team to make the playoffs in a non-strike-shortened season. They played the defending champion New Orleans Saints in the first round. The Onion gave us "New Orleans Saints Given First-Round Bye." Then the Saints lost, leading to the headline "[[http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-orleans-saints-lose-firstround-bye,18755/ New Orleans Saints Lose First-Round Bye]]."
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* In 2010, the Seattle Seahawks became the first losing team to make the playoffs in a non-strike-shortened season. They played the defending champion New Orleans Saints in the first round. The Onion gave us "New Orleans Saints Given First-Round Bye." Then the Saints lost, leading to the headline "[[http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-orleans-saints-lose-firstround-bye,18755/ New Orleans Saints Lose First-Round Bye]]."
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*** And in the corner there is a box that says "Biggest Typesetting In All The Land".
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* In 2010, the Seattle Seahawks became the first team to make the playoffs in a non-strike-shortened season. They played the defending champion New Orleans Saints in the first round. The Onion gave us "New Orleans Saints Given First-Round Bye." Then the Saints lost, leading to the headline "[[http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-orleans-saints-lose-firstround-bye,18755/ New Orleans Saints Lose First-Round Bye]]."
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* Peter K. Rosenthal's [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9V5q0qZ1FdY review]] of ''Film/FiftyShadesOfGrey''
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bloodsoaked-mayor-bloomberg-announces-homelessness,34224/ Blood-soaked Major Bloomberg Announces Homelessness Not Longer A Problem In New York City]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bloodsoaked-mayor-bloomberg-announces-homelessness,34224/ Blood-soaked Major Blood-Soaked Mayor Bloomberg Announces Homelessness Not No Longer A Problem In New York City]]
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* While just about all of their movie reviews are funny, their [[http://www.theonion.com/video/the-onion-reviews-12-years-a-slave,34261/ review]] of ''12 Years a Slave'' is just hysterical.
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* While just about all of their movie reviews are funny, their [[http://www.theonion.com/video/the-onion-reviews-12-years-a-slave,34261/ review]] of ''12 Years a Slave'' ''Film/TwelveYearsASlave'' is just hysterical.
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** It doubles as a CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming.
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/gun-laws-passed-this-year,34806/?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=Default:1:Default Gun Laws Passed This Year]], [[SomeAnvilsNeedToBeDropped especially the final one]].
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/gun-laws-passed-this-year,34806/?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=Default:1:Default com/articles/gun-laws-passed-this-year,34806/ Default Gun Laws Passed This Year]], [[SomeAnvilsNeedToBeDropped especially the final one]].
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* Peter K. Rosenthal's review of The Hobbit: Desolation Of Smaug.
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/gun-laws-passed-this-year,34806/?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=Default:1:Default Gun Laws Passed This Year]], [[SomeAnvilsNeedToBeDropped especially the final one]].
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/who-said-it-kanye-west-or-an-instruction-manual-fo,34344/ Who Said It: Kanye West Or An Instruction Manual For The Cuisinart CRC-400 Electric Rice Cooker?]]
* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/51-blank-slides,34717/ 51 Blank Slides]]. [[spoiler:Doubles as a TakeThatAudience at the end.]]
* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/51-blank-slides,34717/ 51 Blank Slides]]. [[spoiler:Doubles as a TakeThatAudience at the end.]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/buddhist-extremist-cell-vows-to-unleash-tranquilit,34623/ Buddhist Extremist Cell Vows To Unleash Tranquility Upon West]]
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* Smaller side bits promoting features further in the "vintage" papers include "Complete [[Film/{{Rocky}} Creed-Balboa Fight Coverage]]" in 1976 and "Your [[Film/TheEmpireStrikesBack Star Wars 2]] Rumor Central" at the turn of TheEighties.
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* Smaller side bits promoting features further in the "vintage" papers include "Complete [[Film/{{Rocky}} Creed-Balboa Fight Coverage]]" in 1976 and "Your [[Film/TheEmpireStrikesBack Star Wars 2]] Rumor Central" at the turn of TheEighties.
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* While just about all of their movie reviews are funny, their [[http://www.theonion.com/video/the-onion-reviews-12-years-a-slave,34261/ review]] of ''12 Years a Slave'' is just hysterical.
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bloodsoaked-mayor-bloomberg-announces-homelessness,34224/ Blood-soaked Major Bloomberg Announces Homelessness Not Longer A Problem In New York City]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bloodsoaked-mayor-bloomberg-announces-homelessness,34224/ Blood-soaked Major Bloomberg Announces Homelessness Not Longer A Problem In New York City]]
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----
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*[[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bloodsoaked-mayor-bloomberg-announces-homelessness,34224/ Blood-soaked Major Bloomberg Announces Homelessness Not Longer A Problem In New York City]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/8-unlikely-animal-friendships,34188/ 8 Unlikely Animal Friendships]]
--> "This eel has been this shrimp's AA sponsor for 3 years."
--> "This eel has been this shrimp's AA sponsor for 3 years."
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-wonder-if-my-roommate-can-hear-my-girlfriend-and,34147/ I Wonder If My Roommate Can Hear My Girlfriend And Me Firing Civil War Cannons]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/bricks-goddamned-everywhere-reports-psychotic-stud,33684/ Bricks Goddamned Everywhere, Reports Psychotic Study]]
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* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/syria-conflict-intensifies-as-bears-enter-war,33659/ "Syria Conflict Intensifies as Bears Enter War"]], in a BlackComedy kind of way.
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*** Hungary reacts to the war by immediately surrendering to the Soviet Union, giving this darkly humorous and eerily plausible description of Stalin's reaction:
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*** Hungary reacts to the war by immediately surrendering to the Soviet Union, giving this darkly humorous and eerily plausible description of Stalin's JosefStalin's reaction:
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** When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA- Headline Continued on Page 2".
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** When WorldWar2 UsefulNotes/WorldWarII is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA- Headline Continued on Page 2".
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*** One thing this troper found darkly hilarious on that page was a little piece (ahistorical of course, but its the Onion, duh) of Hungary responding to World War 2 by immediatly throwing itself at the Soviet Union's mercy. What I found so funny was that I could envision [[JosephStalin Stalin's]] responding to such an event being exactly the way he is said to respond in the article:
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*** One thing this troper found darkly hilarious on that page was a little piece (ahistorical of course, but its the Onion, duh) of Hungary responding reacts to World War 2 the war by immediatly throwing itself at immediately surrendering to the Soviet Union's mercy. What I found so funny was that I could envision [[JosephStalin Stalin's]] responding to such an event being exactly the way he is said to respond in the article:Union, giving this darkly humorous and eerily plausible description of Stalin's reaction:
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** "[[CandidCamera Allen Funt]] Lets Kennedy In On Hilarious 'Cuban Missile Crisis' Prank"
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*** One thing this troper found darkly hilarious on that page was a little piece (ahistorical of course, but its the Onion, duh) of Hungary responding to World War 2 by immediatly throwing itself at the Soviet Union's mercy. What I found so funny was that I could envision Stalin responding to such an event exactly the way he is said to respond in the article:
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*** One thing this troper found darkly hilarious on that page was a little piece (ahistorical of course, but its the Onion, duh) of Hungary responding to World War 2 by immediatly throwing itself at the Soviet Union's mercy. What I found so funny was that I could envision Stalin [[JosephStalin Stalin's]] responding to such an event being exactly the way he is said to respond in the article:
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*** One thing this troper found darkly hilarious on that page was a little piece (ahistorical of course, but its the Onion, duh) of Hungary responding to World War 2 by immediatly throwing itself at the Soviet Union's mercy. What I found so funny was that I could envision Stalin responding to such an event exactly the way he is said to respond in the article:
-->Stalin, who was present to accept the Hungarian offer, was seen to deliver a curt nod and smile for a long unblinking moment.
-->Stalin, who was present to accept the Hungarian offer, was seen to deliver a curt nod and smile for a long unblinking moment.
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** When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA", continued on page two.
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** When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA", continued "WA- Headline Continued on page two.Page 2".
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A few from the book ''Our Dumb Century'':
* When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA", continued on page two.
* The entire "holy fucking shit we landed on the Moon" article from 1969.
* "OJ Simpson knifes mercilessly through young, vulnerable defense for 214 yards".
* "[=JFK=] Shot by Mafia, Castro, [=CIA=], Teamsters, [=LBJ=] - president shot 129 times from 43 different angles"
* When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA", continued on page two.
* The entire "holy fucking shit we landed on the Moon" article from 1969.
* "OJ Simpson knifes mercilessly through young, vulnerable defense for 214 yards".
* "[=JFK=] Shot by Mafia, Castro, [=CIA=], Teamsters, [=LBJ=] - president shot 129 times from 43 different angles"
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*
** When WorldWar2 is declared: The entire above-the-fold area is dominated by massive letters "WA", continued on page two.
* [[http://www.theonion.com/articles/romney-just-saying-he-grew-up-poor-in-memphis-now,29571/ Romney Just Saying He Grew Up Poor In Memphis Now]]
-->Romney then produced a harmonica from his hip pocket and played a stirring, lonesome melody.