History Funny / RedVsBlue

[[AC:Family Shatters]]
* Zero surfing on his sword in the intro while doing a "hang loose" gesture.
* "Shatter Squad Needs a Pet":
** One of the reasons for getting a pet: "Someone to blame property damage on".
** "I vote cat. [[PsychoKnifeNut They have knives for hands.]]"
** "Excuse me? I fed and watered my weapon every day this week!"
** When Phase reveals that she got a cat without West's knowledge.
--->'''Phase:''' I found it's best not to ask for permission.\\
'''One:''' Right, ask for forgiveness, not permission.\\
'''Phase:''' Oh, I definitely don't ask for that either.
* Axel's addiction to dad jokes is treated as SeriousBusiness. Including by himself, who does a SmokeOut after one, and goes on a "rampage" of sorts. West even says lethal force should be authorized against him before it gets contagious.
-->Can a bird do a pun? No, but toucan!
* "Walk and Talk" successfully recreates the show's absurd conversations, specially when Zero and Phase realize they are aimlessly walking.
* "Beach Episode" has plenty of LeaningOnTheFourthWall commentary, culminating in the budget running out, "animation" by dragging static renders, and a color bar in the colors of the RVB logo.
* "Did you... cut your hair?" "Seriously?! I'm wearing a helmet!" "No, did you... change your make-up?"
* One showing an old cell phone leads Raymond to comment "That's not a phone, that's a brick with buttons!"
* "Phase's Reputation":
** "Why can't the English language [[EverythingSoundsSexierInFrench be sexy?]] Like a Snyder movie without slow motion, it ain't happening."
** After all the tall tales about Phase are contrasted with that she's actually doing (cutting limbs with scissors = trimming a Bonsai; martial arts = Tai Chi Chuan; reshape mountains = doing a topographic model; beastmaster = playing with a cat), she still kills a hidden assailant by throwing her scissors over her shoulder.
** When Zero walks in, he's greeted with the cheering of an offscreen studio audience.
** [[KnowsAGuyWhoKnowsAGuy The escalating rumor chain]].
--->'''One:''' A friend told me that Phase defended Viper base against an elite class of shinobi.\\
\\
'''Raymond:''' Well, a friend's cousin told me…\\
\\
'''West:''' Well, a friend's cousin's chiropractor told me…\\
\\
'''Zero:''' Well, a friend's cousin's chiropractor's golf ball diver told me…
* "The Unbearable Lightness of Zero" has said villain in full LargeHam mode, shooting his alarm clock[[note]]which itself is a pop-up shooting target[[/note]], his enthusiastic spiel about breakfast (followed by him shouting at Phase for daring to correct him), some wordless overacting trying to clean his sword just by staring at it, and an overjoyed delivery of a factoid in a meeting. There is also his 'moment of zen' in a bathtub with his sword.
* Shatter Squad fears wasps worse than Grif and Simmons with bats and snakes. Although this one is no ordinary bug - a highlight is the wasp grabbing One in mid-air and throwing her into a wall.
* "Special Guestmas":
** When Santa shows up, Axel starts reminiscing about childhood holiday difficulties. Then Danyell shoves him aside to make her demands.
--->'''Axel:''' I don't know, a virtual Santa isn't so bad. No long lines, no crying kids. ''[getting lost in memory]'' No serious talks from your mother about having to put those sneakers you wanted on layaway, just in case you turned out to be a bad little boy after all.\\
''[beat]''\\
'''One:''' Yo... you good, Ax?\\
'''Axel:''' ''[chokes up and sniffs]'' Holidays are hard.\\
''[Danyell runs in from offscreen, slamming him aside]''\\
'''Danyell:''' You're taking too long. ''[to Santa]'' I need more knives. ''[mutters]'' And [=AirPods=].
** Throughout the episode, the squad are kept wondering who their special guest is going to be. Even though Lopez, Sarge, and Santa himself show up. After everyone leaves, an animated ''Gus'' shows up...to an empty room.
--->'''Gus:''' Happy federal holiday ever-Hello? ''[looks around]'' Oh goddamnit, I better still get paid for this.
* "Hard Boiled" has, true to the title, a FilmNoir sendoff that's increasingly absurd.
** Before we even get to the FilmNoir, we start with West just trying to watch a movie, but Shatter Squad wants to go out for a late-night meal.
** Raymond starts out by flubbing and calling West "Dad", much to West's annoyance, as he insists that he's their commanding officer, not father. He then follows up with, "And two, go to bed kids, last time you ate this late you had nightmares."
** How does East convince West to let the Squad go out? "No dishes, and we'll leave you alone." "Take the company card."

** This episode has the squad wondering who their special guest is going to be. Even though Lopez, Sarge, and Santa himself show up. After everyone leaves, an animated ''Gus'' shows up...to an empty room.

-->'''Gus:''' Happy federal holiday ever-Hello? ''[looks around]'' Oh goddamnit, I better still get paid for this.

* One of the reasons for getting a pet: "Someone to blame property damage on".
* "I vote cat. [[PsychoKnifeNut They have knives for hands.]]"
* "Excuse me? I fed and watered my weapon every day this week!"

* “Why can't the English language [[EverythingSoundsSexierInFrench be sexy?]] Like a Snyder movie without slow motion, it ain’t happening.”
* After all the tall tales about Phase are contrasted with that she's actually doing (cutting limbs with scissors = trimming a Bonsai; martial arts = Tai Chi Chuan; reshape mountains = doing a topographic model; beastmaster = playing with a cat), she still kills a hidden assailant by throwing her scissors over her shoulder.

* "Special Guestmas" has the squad wondering who their special guest is going to be. Even though Lopez, Sarge, and Santa himself show up. After everyone leaves, an animated ''Gus'' shows up...to an empty room.

--->'''Church:''' That's not what I meant! That's not how it works, dummy!\\

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[[/folder]]

Virtually ''every'' episode of ''Machinima/RedVsBlue'' has a Crowning Moment of Funny. These are the best ones. '''Warning: Each folder will contain unmarked spoilers for the previous seasons.'''

* The "Return to Work" PSA hosted by Agents Washington and Carolina has the Freelancers explaining how you can re-integrate into the workplace after staying home during a pandemic, with the Reds and Blues screwing around as usual.
** Lopez's DespairEventHorizon when he sees the troopers again.
** And the punchline- Wash and Carolina are ''still'' working from home, using a green screen to look like they're in Blood Gulch.
->'''Carolina:''' They can take my pajama pants when they rip them from my cold, dead hands.

** How they explain Caboose's new voice and being different, he has a mullet.

'''(The map changes to a green screen, showing that Washington and Carolina are not at the base)''\\

-->'''Grif:''' You know what? I give up. My eyes were bigger thank my fucks on this one. (sighs) he won't change.

** The results of Grif's medical exam: [[ThrowTheDogABone Perfect blood pressure,]] his blood is 50% marinara sauce, his knees are dust, his bone density is 2%, and [[UpToEleven he has type 7 diabetes.]] The MRI guy tells him that his suit's life support is the only reason he's still alive.

* The "Return to Work" PSA hosted by Agents Washington and Carolina has the Freelancers explaining how you can re-intergrate into the workplace after staying home during a pandemic, with the Reds and Blues screwing around as usual/

--->December Fool's Day, Groundhog Day, New Fear's Day, Chinese New Fears, [[Film/GroundhogDay Groundhog Day]], XXX-Mas (18+ ONLY), Brother From Another Mother's Day, Roboween, [=ROM=] Kippur, [[GroundhogDayLoop Groundhog Day]], Rhode Island Appreciation Day, Earf Day, Mardi Gross, Dependence Day, [[Film/TheCabinInTheWoods Kevin]], Manual Labor Day, Dia de los Huevos, [=MILK=] Jr. Day, Cyber Monday, Uncle's Day

* "I vote cat. [[KnifeNut They have knives for hands.]]"

* "Walk and Talk" sucessfully recreates the show's absurd conversations, specially when Zero and Phase realize they are aimlessly walking.

'''Sarge:''' It doesn't have to be just dinosaurs, moron. Any animal turns in to oil when it dies. So remember: if you wanna be environmentally friendly, ''[[KillThemAll just kill every living thing you see]]''! And bury it.\\

** "FUCK ART, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

--->'''Caboose:''' Eh. It was my backup school.
** Tucker is reprimanded by Simmons for yelling in the museum... since, as Simmons states, "[[BaitAndSwitch this isn't a library]]".

* [[https://roosterteeth.com/watch/red-vs-blue-psa-2020-2-22 "Spice It Up!"]]. In which Sarge and Grif discuss how to keep their "[[SelfDeprecation reluctantly]] [[LongRunners immortal]]" series interesting. There's when they suggest adding to the cast...

** The results of Grif's medical exam: [[ThrowTheDogABone Perfect blood pressure,]] a cholesterol level high enough to clog a toilet, his blood is 50% marinara sauce, his knees are dust, his bone density is 2%, and [[UpToEleven he has type 7 diabetes.]] The MRI guy tells him that his suit's life support is the only reason he's still alive.

** Caboose's reflex test: Every time the doctor taps his leg, [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext he doesn't react, but a machine turns on/off,]] culminating in all the toilets in the hospital flushing at once.

--->'''Donut:''' At least I have all this French cheese to comfort me. (tearing up) It smells ''terrible!''

'''Grif:''' Try selling them on lava house first. [[CrossesTheLineTwice Those dickheads love burning shit!]]

-->'''Simmons:''' I think we just figured out how to make the Earth a better place again!\\
'''Sister:''' I'll go start making some calls!\\

** Sarge and Caboose go camping. It goes about as well as you'd expect. Except that they go camping in ''{{VideoGame/Minecraft}}''.

* In [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8bzvODzPJ8 "The Winter Lames: the Olympics Suck"]], Sarge has several suggestions on how to improve the events, most of which boil down to StuffBlowingUp.
-->'''Church:''' Okay, well instead of just criticizing the Games, I think we should concentrate on helping make the current Olympic events more fun to watch.\\

* In the [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8bzvODzPJ8 "Winter Olympics"]] PSA, Sarge gets the idea to give medals of ''enriched uranium'' to the losers.

* In [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5RKt6lPoNY "Lethargy Crisis"]], Sarge's insane solution to make more fossil fuel.
-->'''Sarge:''' [Everyone] knows that gasoline comes from dinosaurs. If we're running out of gas, the solution isn't to drive less, it's to kill more dinosaurs!\\

'''Simmons:''' But that process takes millions of years!\\

'''Sarge:''' No, like replacing the skis with ''heat seeking missiles''! And the jumping with exploding.\\

** "The Franchise Player" features a player, "Extermination" Murphy, whose constantly in jail for excessive violence, but is paid more half the Grifball League's payroll. Naturally, he gets put onto Team Slipspace. Of course, due to legal reasons, he's not allowed outside of a tiny cage. And due to his contract stipulations, only ''Murphy'' is allowed to score. How does Team Slipspace deal with this? They give him the Grifball, shove his cage to the goal so he score...and leave him there. [[StuffBlowingUp And we all know what happens when you score in Grifball...]]