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Changed line(s) 134 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik''': Well, he shouldn't be, because I am not getting him that blowjob! (everything starts shaking in the room) Oh, what is it? Come at me, you australian pums!
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-->'''Marik''': Well, he shouldn't be, because I am not getting him that blowjob! (everything starts shaking in the room) Oh, what is it? Come at me, you australian pums!ponce!
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Not necessary to say "Funny joke on funny page".
Deleted line(s) 1,2 (click to see context) :
It's Creator/LittleKuriboh! It is a guarantee that this page exists!
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Changed line(s) 243,244 (click to see context) from:
-->''While sneaking behind an enemy'': "Ah, yes, vampires, creatures of the night, known for passing under the cover of darkness by hunching over awkwardly and walking like a crab with two broken legs!"
-->''After backstabbing a thug'': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine."
-->''After backstabbing a thug'': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine."
to:
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Changed line(s) 242,243 (click to see context) from:
* When killing a random mook with a knife, Bakura points out how this isn't what vampires usually are known for and delivers this pearl:
-->'''Bakura''': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine."
-->'''Bakura''': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine."
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* When killing a random mook with a knife, Bakura points out how Bakura's frustration over the fact [[ThePiratesWhoDontDoAnything this isn't what game's vampires usually are hardly do anything you'd expect a vampire to do]]:
-->''While sneaking behind an enemy'': "Ah, yes, vampires, creatures of the night, known for passing under the cover of darkness by hunching over awkwardly anddelivers this pearl:
-->'''Bakura''':walking like a crab with two broken legs!"
-->''After backstabbing a thug'': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine.""
* Upon hearing mooks talking:
-->"Uh oh, someone is speaking generic video game thug language, I better get my universal translator out."
* Bakura criticizing how un-sneaky his character is:
-->"Ouuuh, don't look at me, [[HighlyVisibleNinja I am wearing bright red and I dyed my hair scarlet! I'm camouflaged, apparently: nobody looks at the bright red gangly thing that's jumping around like a lunatic! He's INVISIBLE!]]"
-->''While sneaking behind an enemy'': "Ah, yes, vampires, creatures of the night, known for passing under the cover of darkness by hunching over awkwardly and
-->'''Bakura''':
-->''After backstabbing a thug'': Imagine being that guy and getting in the afterlife and having to explain to your friends how you died: "Oh, yes, I got killed by a vampire!" "Oh? did he suck your blood, or something?" "No, he... he stabbed me." "... Oh. Well that's rather lame. It's kind of a lame death, you being stabbed by a vampire... I mean, did you put up a fight?" "No, he got me from behind and he just sort of stabbed me." "Oh." "Well... How did ''you'' die?" "Oh, I got shot in the face by a werewolf!" "... That's still better than mine.
* Upon hearing mooks talking:
-->"Uh oh, someone is speaking generic video game thug language, I better get my universal translator out."
* Bakura criticizing how un-sneaky his character is:
-->"Ouuuh, don't look at me, [[HighlyVisibleNinja I am wearing bright red and I dyed my hair scarlet! I'm camouflaged, apparently: nobody looks at the bright red gangly thing that's jumping around like a lunatic! He's INVISIBLE!]]"
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Changed line(s) 202 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Melvin''': Is... Is he attacking me with ''his own severed arm''?! Is that what's happening? [[NightmareFetishist THIS IS THE GREATEST VIDEO GAME FIGHT OF ALL TIMES!]]
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-->'''Melvin''': Is... Is he attacking me with ''his own severed arm''?! Is that what's happening? [[NightmareFetishist THIS IS THE GREATEST VIDEO GAME BOSS FIGHT OF ALL TIMES!]]
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* Melvin's awe over the boss fight with Gimble involving him attacking with his own severed arm.
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* "This game has taught me that if you live in Hollywood, you are either a SerialKiller or a vampire. Or a vampire serial killer. Or a serial killer that specializes in killing vampires. These are the options, pick one."
* Melvin's awe over the boss fight withGimble involving him Gimble:
-->'''Melvin''': Is... Is he attacking me withhis ''his own severed arm.arm''?! Is that what's happening? [[NightmareFetishist THIS IS THE GREATEST VIDEO GAME FIGHT OF ALL TIMES!]]
* Melvin's awe over the boss fight with
-->'''Melvin''': Is... Is he attacking me with
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* Melvin's awe over the boss fight with Gimble involving him attacking with his own severed arm.
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-->'''Melvin:''' ''HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?!?!''
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-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin''': (stabbing) Yes, his name is mr Stabby, and you would do well to listen to him! (After seeing the patient still isn't dead) Ah, I have exhausted all of my medical training! There's only one thing left to do: I'm going to have to bring out the big gun! (shoots the patient) [[NotHyperbole Which is literally a big gun!]]
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin''': ''Yes'', someone's there, he's called the Grim Reaper, and he wants you to shut the frig up!
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin''': ''YES'' SOMEBODY IS HERE, FOR GOD'S SAKE, SHUT THE FRIG UP!
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin:'''''HOW ''[[WhyWontYouDie HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?!?!''ALIVE]]?!?!''
-->'''Melvin''': (stabbing) Yes, his name is mr Stabby, and you would do well to listen to him! (After seeing the patient still isn't dead) Ah, I have exhausted all of my medical training! There's only one thing left to do: I'm going to have to bring out the big gun! (shoots the patient) [[NotHyperbole Which is literally a big gun!]]
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin''': ''Yes'', someone's there, he's called the Grim Reaper, and he wants you to shut the frig up!
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin''': ''YES'' SOMEBODY IS HERE, FOR GOD'S SAKE, SHUT THE FRIG UP!
-->'''Patient''': Is someone there?
-->'''Melvin:'''
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* Marik's interpretation of the various paintings in [=LaCroix=]'s office:
-->'''First painting (despicting a man trying to throw another off a cliff)''': Ah, the portrait of the first ever attempt at a curb-stomp. Didn't go very well.
-->'''Second painting (featuring someone walking away from another laying man)''': Ah, this one is called "Honey, can you get up and check if we locked the front door?"
-->'''Third painting (featuring a feminine man with long hair and roman armor)''': The straightest man in the fifteen-hundreds!
-->'''Fourth painting (featuring a woman on a horse with her escort)''': And over here, we have a portrait of the first ever flash mob recorded in history...
-->'''Fifth painting (featuring two man fighting with knives)''': Before you could block people on social media, ''[[MurderIsTheBestSolution this]]'' is how most arguments were resolved!
-->'''First painting (despicting a man trying to throw another off a cliff)''': Ah, the portrait of the first ever attempt at a curb-stomp. Didn't go very well.
-->'''Second painting (featuring someone walking away from another laying man)''': Ah, this one is called "Honey, can you get up and check if we locked the front door?"
-->'''Third painting (featuring a feminine man with long hair and roman armor)''': The straightest man in the fifteen-hundreds!
-->'''Fourth painting (featuring a woman on a horse with her escort)''': And over here, we have a portrait of the first ever flash mob recorded in history...
-->'''Fifth painting (featuring two man fighting with knives)''': Before you could block people on social media, ''[[MurderIsTheBestSolution this]]'' is how most arguments were resolved!
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* [=LaCroix=] then asks Marik if he had some problems on his way:
-->'''Marik''': Well, [[ContinuityNod Meb Gibson did give me a bit of difficulty]], but I think it's hard to rain that guy in, you know... once he is going, he is going.
-->'''[=LaCroix=]''': Oh? Then I'll see that he is suitably punished.
-->'''Marik''': Pretty sure that's already been handled by Hollywood.
-->'''Marik''': Well, [[ContinuityNod Meb Gibson did give me a bit of difficulty]], but I think it's hard to rain that guy in, you know... once he is going, he is going.
-->'''[=LaCroix=]''': Oh? Then I'll see that he is suitably punished.
-->'''Marik''': Pretty sure that's already been handled by Hollywood.
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** Bakura suggests Slenderman might be british:
-->'''Marik''': Last time I checked, british people didn't have tentacles!
-->'''Bakura''': Obviously you haven't met the royal family.
-->'''Marik''': Last time I checked, british people didn't have tentacles!
-->'''Bakura''': Obviously you haven't met the royal family.
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-->'''Marik''': [[SarcasmMode Wow, it's nice to see that the vampire society didn't spare me any expense in my accomodations!]] ''(looking at the [[{{Squick}} stained bedclothes]])'' And oh hey! My bedclothes are ''covered in urine! They '''shouldn't have!''''' Something tells me that "Jack" guy had something to do with this. ''(imitating Jack)'' "''(gibberish)'' come here to piss on yer bed! ''(gibberish)''" And what's with all these freaking notes?! I have a computer--it's right there! Just email me! What is this, the Dark Ages?! I know you're vampires and all, but come on! ''(sits at a laptop with a primitive looking command line OS)'' And oh good! My laptop is apparently on loan from the 1980's! ''(imitating a monotone computer voice)'' "[[{{Wargames}} Hello, Mr. Ishtar. Would you like to play a game?]]" I feel like frigging [[WebAnimation/HomestarRunner Strong Bad]] here...''(reading)'' "Mercurio will contact you when you get to San--" yeah, maybe Mercurio can run over here and de-urinate my freaking bed, huh? How about that?! ''(reading an "enlarge your penis" spam e-mail)'' Hey, Bakura! I think I got some of ''your'' e-mail by mistake!
to:
-->'''Marik''': [[SarcasmMode Wow, it's nice to see that the vampire society didn't spare me any expense in my accomodations!]] ''(looking at the [[{{Squick}} stained bedclothes]])'' And oh hey! My bedclothes are ''covered in urine! They '''shouldn't have!''''' Something tells me that "Jack" guy had something to do with this. ''(imitating Jack)'' "''(gibberish)'' come here to piss on yer bed! ''(gibberish)''" And what's with all these freaking notes?! I have a computer--it's right there! Just email me! What is this, the Dark Ages?! I know you're vampires and all, but come on! ''(sits at a laptop with a primitive looking command line OS)'' And oh good! My laptop is apparently on loan from the 1980's! ''(imitating a monotone computer voice)'' "[[{{Wargames}} "[[Film/WarGames Hello, Mr. Ishtar. Would you like to play a game?]]" I feel like frigging [[WebAnimation/HomestarRunner Strong Bad]] here...''(reading)'' "Mercurio will contact you when you get to San--" yeah, maybe Mercurio can run over here and de-urinate my freaking bed, huh? How about that?! ''(reading an "enlarge your penis" spam e-mail)'' Hey, Bakura! I think I got some of ''your'' e-mail by mistake!
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Changed line(s) 137 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Bakura''': Em... Marik? [[GenreSavvy You probably shouldn't]]...
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-->'''Bakura''': Em... Marik? [[GenreSavvy You probably shouldn't]]...shouldn't...
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Changed line(s) 49 (click to see context) from:
* "Tim Burton would love to live in a place like this: no sunlight and freaks everywhere."
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* "Tim Burton would love to live in a place like this: no sunlight and freaks everywhere."sunlight, surrounded by freaks...[[OhCrap oh my god]], what if that homeless guy ''was'' Tim Burton?! I could have killed a national ''treasure''!"
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** Even better: Bakura admits he can't deny this.
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[[folder:Part 17]]
* Marik reports to [=LaCroix=], who asks if he blew up the warehouse.
-->'''Marik:''' Well, mostly Bakura did it, but sure, I'll take credit.
-->'''[=LaCroix=]:''' Most excellent.
-->'''Bakura:''' Bloody typical.
* Marik learns of the Ankaran Sarcophagus. Undead people, plus a sarcophagus leads Marik to assume that maybe Yami is the BigBad.
* Marik asks Bakura what he should by from Fat Larry. Bakura tells him to buy the deadliest weapon Larry has and murder everybody. Marik buys the snazzy new outfit, because [[MrFanservice his body]] is the deadliest weapon in the game.
[[/folder]]
* Marik reports to [=LaCroix=], who asks if he blew up the warehouse.
-->'''Marik:''' Well, mostly Bakura did it, but sure, I'll take credit.
-->'''[=LaCroix=]:''' Most excellent.
-->'''Bakura:''' Bloody typical.
* Marik learns of the Ankaran Sarcophagus. Undead people, plus a sarcophagus leads Marik to assume that maybe Yami is the BigBad.
* Marik asks Bakura what he should by from Fat Larry. Bakura tells him to buy the deadliest weapon Larry has and murder everybody. Marik buys the snazzy new outfit, because [[MrFanservice his body]] is the deadliest weapon in the game.
[[/folder]]
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Changed line(s) 102 (click to see context) from:
** This is even funnier if you're familiar with the OldWorldOfDarkness. Marik's character is a Toreador; he SHOULD have a reflection, but sadly graphics limitations intervene.
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** This is even funnier if you're familiar with the OldWorldOfDarkness.TabletopGame/OldWorldOfDarkness. Marik's character is a Toreador; he SHOULD have a reflection, but sadly graphics limitations intervene.
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Changed line(s) 1,2 (click to see context) from:
It's LittleKuriboh! It is a guarantee that this page exists!
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It's LittleKuriboh! Creator/LittleKuriboh! It is a guarantee that this page exists!
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Changed line(s) 181 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Melvin''': *singing while attacking a security guard with a knife* I believe you can diiiiiieeee! I believe I will stab your thigh!
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-->'''Melvin''': *singing while attacking a security guard with a knife* I believe you can diiiiiieeee! I believe I will stab your thigh!thigh! I think about it every night and day! I'll stab your face and your blood will spray!
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* Marik sees a computer in-game has the password "Imalia" and comments on how short it is. He then reveals that to unlock ''his'' computer you have to say a modified version of the chant to summon the Winged Dragon of Ra.
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Changed line(s) 226 (click to see context) from:
* Bakura learns his mission is to place explosives in a warehouse to blow it up. He doesn't hide his happiness.
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* Bakura learns his mission is to place explosives in a warehouse to blow it up. [[CardCarryingVillain He doesn't hide his happiness.happiness]].
Changed line(s) 231 (click to see context) from:
* When killing a random mook with a knife, Bakura points out how this isn't what vampires usually are known for and deliver this pearl:
to:
* When killing a random mook with a knife, Bakura points out how this isn't what vampires usually are known for and deliver delivers this pearl:
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Changed line(s) 204 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik''': Somehow this is more effective than simply punching him with my own arm! Weeee! How is this friggin arm so powerful, did it belong to a jedi, or something?
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-->'''Marik''': Somehow this is more effective than simply punching him with my own arm! Weeee! Wheeee! How is this friggin arm so powerful, did it belong to a jedi, Jedi, or something?
Changed line(s) 226 (click to see context) from:
* Bakura learns his mission is to place explosives in a warehouse to blow it up. He doesn't hide his happyness.
to:
* Bakura learns his mission is to place explosives in a warehouse to blow it up. He doesn't hide his happyness.happiness.
Changed line(s) 237 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik:''' He looks like friggin' David Carradine after bobbing for apples in a vat of battery acid! The frigg?! F-frigg frigg f-f-frigg frigg...
to:
-->'''Marik:''' He looks like friggin' David Carradine after bobbing for apples in a vat of battery acid! The frigg?! F-frigg frigg f-f-frigg frigg...frig?! F-frig frig f-f-frig frig...
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-->'''Marik:''' Sounds like I'm walking in cereal. I like walking in cereal, it's the most important floor of the day. This is what it sounds like whenever my cat goes to use the litterbox.
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-->'''Marik:''' Sounds like I'm walking in cereal. I like walking in cereal, it's the most important floor of the day. This is what it sounds like whenever my cat goes to use the litterbox.litter box.
Changed line(s) 262 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik:''' Frig, he is there! LOOK OUUUUT THERE GOES A SLENDERMAAAAN!!
to:
-->'''Marik:''' Frig, he is there! (singing to the tune of [[ItMakesSenseInContext the Spider-Man theme]]) LOOK OUUUUT THERE GOES A SLENDERMAAAAN!!
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** ''(as thugs armed with wooden stakes break into the apartment)'' "Watchtower~" ''(stakes PC and woman he was with)'' "GAH! Talk about morning wood! [[LowestCommonDenominator Heh, did that joke for Rex and Weevil]].
to:
** ''(as thugs armed with wooden stakes break into the apartment)'' "Watchtower~" ''(stakes PC and woman he was with)'' "GAH! Talk about morning wood! [[LowestCommonDenominator Heh, did that joke for Rex and Weevil]]."
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Changed line(s) 215 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik''': Ah, up next on our tour of Santa Monica, it is the... [[IDontLikeTheSoundOfThatPlace vicious brutal murder site]]! [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin This were people get viciously brutally murdered]]! Uh... it's kind of a weird stop on the tour... I don't know why people come here, unless they want to get murdered brutally and viciously, but there you go! There you can see [[BlatantLies Santa Monica's finest police officers]] doing [[PoliceAreUseless what they do best- standing aroud doing nothing at all and just sort of hoping the crime solves itself!]]
to:
-->'''Marik''': Ah, up next on our tour of Santa Monica, it is the... [[IDontLikeTheSoundOfThatPlace vicious brutal murder site]]! [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin This were people get viciously brutally murdered]]! Uh... it's kind of a weird stop on the tour... I don't know why people come here, unless they want to get murdered brutally and viciously, but there you go! There you can see [[BlatantLies Santa Monica's finest police officers]] doing [[PoliceAreUseless what they do best- standing aroud around doing nothing at all and just sort of hoping the crime solves itself!]]
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-->'''Bakura:''' He comes from a world of darkness where no trace of humanity exists and should you enter it's unholy domain, you'll find yourself unable to escape with your sanity intact.
to:
-->'''Bakura:''' He comes from a world of darkness where no trace of humanity exists and should you enter it's its unholy domain, you'll find yourself unable to escape with your sanity intact.
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Changed line(s) 173 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Bakura:''' Uhh... I-I'll be off to the shops for a minute...\\
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-->'''Bakura:''' Uhh... I-I'll be going off to the shops for a minute...bit, I'll be back in about 10 minutes...\\
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Changed line(s) 117 (click to see context) from:
* The doorbell rings, prompting Marik to ask Bakura to get it. When Bakura protests that he's reading a book, Marik says he's been ''pretending'' to read a book and has actually been staring at him for the past 20 minutes.
to:
* The doorbell rings, prompting Marik to ask Bakura to get it. When Bakura protests that he's reading a book, Marik says he's been ''pretending'' to read a book it and has actually been staring at him for the past 20 minutes.two hours.
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* The doorbell rings, prompting Marik to ask Bakura to get it. When Bakura protests that he's reading a book, Marik says he's been ''pretending'' to read a book and has actually been staring at him for the past 20 minutes.
-->'''Marik:''' Put down ''Literature/TheCountOfMonteCristo'' and go open The Count of Monte DOOR!
** Making it funnier is that ''The Count of Monte Cristo'' is one of the most famous revenge stories of all time, so it makes sense for Bakura to read it.
-->'''Marik:''' Put down ''Literature/TheCountOfMonteCristo'' and go open The Count of Monte DOOR!
** Making it funnier is that ''The Count of Monte Cristo'' is one of the most famous revenge stories of all time, so it makes sense for Bakura to read it.
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* The ending of the video, where Melvin gets distracted from going after Bakura due to video games.
-->'''Bakura:''' Uhh... I-I'll be off to the shops for a minute...\\
'''Melvin:''' Foolish fool! The shops cannot save you from my--oh, hey, a video game!
-->'''Bakura:''' Uhh... I-I'll be off to the shops for a minute...\\
'''Melvin:''' Foolish fool! The shops cannot save you from my--oh, hey, a video game!
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** Immediately followed up with this:
-->'''Marik''': I do not do that! ''I have never touched a butt!''
-->'''Bakura''': That's...not feasibly possible.
-->'''Marik''': I do not do that! ''I have never touched a butt!''
-->'''Bakura''': That's...not feasibly possible.
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Changed line(s) 113 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Marik:''' I'm choosing to believe that this whole house is like that house from [[Disney/BeautyAndTheBeast Beauty and the Beast]], and all the furniture are going to start singing at me. Hey, watch this. *singing* Be our guest, be our guest... *chandelier falls down in front of him* OH MY GOD LUMIÉRE TRIED TO KILL ME! I knew it! Furniture can't be trusted.
to:
-->'''Marik:''' I'm choosing to believe that this whole house is like that house from [[Disney/BeautyAndTheBeast Beauty and the Beast]], and all the furniture are is going to start singing at me. Hey, watch this. *singing* Be our guest, be our guest... *chandelier falls down in front of him* OH MY GOD LUMIÉRE TRIED TO KILL ME! I knew it! Furniture can't be trusted. First chance I get I'm getting a shotgun and I'm going after Mrs. Potts!
